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Fragile Eye Archetype [Written]


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This is my first attempt at making some balanced cards. I would love to hear how to fix the grammar on these cards and whether or not their balanced. I'm not trying to make them OP or follow the current meta or anything. This is just a fun idea and I might add more cards to this archetype. I added some flavour text to these cards so that it'll be easier to visualize them while I'm making their card art.

 

Fragile Eye Archetype
Legends say that there once lived a powerful mage who, at the cost of his vision, gained great magical abilities. Those who dabble in the unnatural seek his most prized creations in hopes of resurrecting him.

"Combined Eye"
Normal Trap
When your opponent adds a card(s) from their Deck to their hand (except during the Draw Phase or the Damage Step): Both players reveal their hands and banish 1 card from each other's hand, also, after that, toss a coin:
• Heads: Special Summon 1 "Fragile Eye" from your hand or Deck.
• Tails: Special Summon 1 "Sick Eye" from your hand or Deck.
"Looks to be a shattered Fragile Eye."

"Sick Eye"
Level 1 DARK
[Fiend/Effect]
When this card is Special Summoned: Target 1 "Sick Eye" or "Fragile Eye" in your GY; add it to your hand. If this card was Normal or Special Summoned: Place 1 counter on this card. During your End Phase: Place 1 counter on this card (max. 2). You can remove 1 counter from this card, then target 1 card on the field; destroy it. If a Trap Card is sent to your opponent's GY: Place 1 counter on this card (max. 2) and then destroy 1 card on the field.
800/200
1579494194_SickEyeCardArt.png.c41eccbf3b5a41d9e3bd6812f6baf123.png
"An unsightly eyeball that seems to have been brought to life! Its strong arms can hurl anything in its vicinity away. However, its puffy eyelids give it poor vision."

"Fragile Eye"
Level 1 DARK
[Fiend/Effect]
When this card is Special Summoned: Target 1 "Fragile Eye" or "Sick Eye" in your GY; add it to your hand. If this card was Normal or Special Summoned: Place 1 counter on this card. When your opponent activates a Spell Card: Place 1 counter on this card (max. 2). You can remove 1 counter from this card, then activate one of the following effects:
• Target 1 monster your opponent controls; change it to Defense Position and negate its effect.
• Target 1 monster you control; it cannot be destroyed by card effects.
When this card is destroyed by battle and sent to the GY: add 1 "Combined Eye" from your GY or Deck to your hand.
200/800
"A glass sculpture of an eyeball that is tinted green. If you listen closely you will hear a pulse. Any monsters in its line of vision will find themselves unable to move. It is said that, if dropped, something terrible will happen."

"Blind Magician"
Level 5 DARK
[Spellcaster/Fusion/Effect]
"Fragile Eye" + "Sick Eye"
Must be either Fusion Summoned, or Special Summoned by sending the above monsters you control to the GY (in which case you do not use "Polymerization"). This card's name is also treated as "Sick Eye" and "Fragile Eye". While this card is face-up on the field, your face-up Level 1 monsters cannot be destroyed by battle or card effects. Once per turn (Quick Effect): You can target 1 "Sick Eye" or "Fragile Eye" in your GY; Special Summon it. While there is a face-up "Fragile Eye" on the field: This card cannot be targeted for an attack. This card gains 500 ATK for each "Sick Eye" on the field.
2000/1500
1820817085_BlindMagicianCardArt.png.b37a85396833866a5e4e4c37faf97ee7.png
"A legendary magician, who used his own eyes to create magical objects that gave him protection from harmful magic. Though blind, nothing can sneak up on him."

Blind Magician Card Art Preview.png

Edited by o.22
Card Effect Revision
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  • o.22 changed the title to Fragile Eye Archetype [Written]

Hey there, welcome in the Realistic Cards Section :D

First of all I'd like to say that I usually like to have some background information on the archeype I am reviewing, so when you post a balanced (finished) archetype, maybe consider writing a small introduction to the theme or presentation of the concept. If you don't feel like writing alot, something along these lines should usually do it:

The Sick/Fragile Eye Archetype is composed of fiend monsters that prevent your opponent from activating effects. They are a homage to the mythological figure of the blind magician, who is represented by the Fusion Monster which rounds off the small engine with a nice Contact Fusion.

Now to the actual concept. I'm personally a huge fan of smaller archetypes/engines in customs as they are easier to balance and can be mixed up with meta for better consistency. I don't think that the concept of preventing your opponent from activating any cards is very interactive though.

Combined Eye is an interesting variation of Dark Law-ish effects, as it allows you to punish your opponent really hard for searching, while also giving them the opportunity to return the favor. Since it also Special Summons a monster, it's basically a +0 in card advantage, which I think is balanced if you look at it separately. The card text is a little weird (and wrong) to be honest. Taking a look at Dark Law here, it states:

Quote

If your opponent adds a card(s) from their Deck to their hand (except during the Draw Phase or the Damage Step)

So to match this with a "when"-Trigger for Traps and your effect, it should be:

Quote

When your opponent adds a card(s) from their Deck to their hand (except during the Draw Phase or the Damage Step): Both players reveal their hands and banish 1 card from each other's hand, also, after that, toss a coin:
• Heads: Special Summon 1 "Fragile Eye" from your hand or Deck.
• Tails: Special Summon 1 "Sick Eye" from your hand or Deck.

Note that a dot usually separates effects, so to resolve the coin toss in sequence, the junction should be a "also, after that". This will prevent optional "when" triggers, that activate when a card is banished from activating. If you want the first and second part of the effect resolve simultaneously, just use "also" as junction. Also I've never seen "Deck or hand" anywhere before. Even though it's technically not wrong, it is customary to call the hand first.

Sick Eye kind of reminds me of Altergeists, as it's pretty easy to bring up, since it is Level 1 (not Rank 1!) and searchable by One For One, Where Arf Thou and similar cards, and a pretty beasty interruption. Anyhow regarding that it has super weak stats, requires 2 copies on the field to be effective and its destruction effect is an ignition effect, I'd rather call it underpowered. For the PSCT here, firstly remind, that words are capitalized after colons. Furthermore modern cards no longer use the term "Graveyard" but just its abbreviation "GY". Also the condition for the obstructive effects might seem gramatically correct, but on a second thought it seems like a trigger, and since continuous effects cannot be triggered, you should use this wording:

Quote

When this card is Special Summoned: Target 1 "Sick Eye" or "Fragile Eye" in your GY; add it to your hand. If there are 2 or more "Sick Eye" on the field, this card gains the following effects:
• Your opponent cannot activate any Trap Cards.
• You can tribute 1 "Sick Eye" you control; destroy up to 2 cards your opponent controls.

I also made the Tributing part a proper cost (using a semicolon), since effects don't usually Tribute cards and I assumed you intended it to be a cost.

Pretty much all of the above PSCT complaints also apply to Fragile Eye. This one seems to be alot stronger to be honest. If you actually manage to put two of these on the board (and protect them with a Linkuriboh or something), which seems accessible in a Level 1 Spam Deck, and also get the monster negate effect on, this basically means a turn skip for your opponent, except if they play a very trap-heavy Deck. I mean VFD alone is huge in the current meta, but this is also a built-in Secret Village. Change the VFD-ish effect to something going second related, just like Sick Eye's destruction effect, and this is perfecty balanced.

Blind Magician is a little bit weird to me, as it doesn't really follow a clear concept. Maybe you just messed the wording up a little bit, but it seems like this does the same as Fragile Eye, but worse. It states "you can negate all monster effects activated on your opponent's field", which leaves a bit space for interpretation. I'd understand this as "negate all monster effects activated on your opponent's field until the End Phase", which does save you from further interruptions, but I think your opponent would have already used his interruptions at the point you are summoning this card. Also since it's not a Quick Effect, this would not prevent your opponent from doing anything during his own turn, except if it was meant to be "until your opponent's next End Phase", as which it would again be a pretty broken effect, which calls for the banhammer (I'm looking at you VFD). To be honest I'd have expected something like:

Quote

This card's name is also treated as "Sick Eye" and "Fragile Eye". If there is another "Sick Eye" and "Fragile Eye" on the field, this card gains the following effects:
• Once per turn (Quick Effect): You can negate the effects of all face-up monsters your opponent controls until the End Phase.
• Your face-up Level 1 monsters cannot be destroyed by battle or card effects.

With something like that, the archetype should feel much less clunky when playing and also maybe stand a solid chance against the current meta. By the way here's your correct Contact Fusion PSCT:

Quote

"Fragile Eye" + "Sick Eye"
Must first be Special Summoned (from your Extra Deck) by sending the above cards you control to the GY. (You do not use "Polymerization".)

I don't know if you also intended this card to be summonable with Polymerization, but this "Must first..." surpasses the summon limitation of Extra Deck monsters, so you could also revive it with cards like Monster Reborn after using the contact fusion condition.

All in all the archetype provides an interesting theme, but I don't really think that playing with or against it would create a pleasant (interactive) game.

Greets,
Messoras

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On 2/8/2021 at 8:05 AM, Messoras said:

Hey there, welcome in the Realistic Cards Section :D

First of all I'd like to say that I usually like to have some background information on the archeype I am reviewing, so when you post a balanced (finished) archetype, maybe consider writing a small introduction to the theme or presentation of the concept. If you don't feel like writing alot, something along these lines should usually do it:

The Sick/Fragile Eye Archetype is composed of fiend monsters that prevent your opponent from activating effects. They are a homage to the mythological figure of the blind magician, who is represented by the Fusion Monster which rounds off the small engine with a nice Contact Fusion.

Now to the actual concept. I'm personally a huge fan of smaller archetypes/engines in customs as they are easier to balance and can be mixed up with meta for better consistency. I don't think that the concept of preventing your opponent from activating any cards is very interactive though.

Combined Eye is an interesting variation of Dark Law-ish effects, as it allows you to punish your opponent really hard for searching, while also giving them the opportunity to return the favor. Since it also Special Summons a monster, it's basically a +0 in card advantage, which I think is balanced if you look at it separately. The card text is a little weird (and wrong) to be honest. Taking a look at Dark Law here, it states:

So to match this with a "when"-Trigger for Traps and your effect, it should be:

Note that a dot usually separates effects, so to resolve the coin toss in sequence, the junction should be a "also, after that". This will prevent optional "when" triggers, that activate when a card is banished from activating. If you want the first and second part of the effect resolve simultaneously, just use "also" as junction. Also I've never seen "Deck or hand" anywhere before. Even though it's technically not wrong, it is customary to call the hand first.

Sick Eye kind of reminds me of Altergeists, as it's pretty easy to bring up, since it is Level 1 (not Rank 1!) and searchable by One For One, Where Arf Thou and similar cards, and a pretty beasty interruption. Anyhow regarding that it has super weak stats, requires 2 copies on the field to be effective and its destruction effect is an ignition effect, I'd rather call it underpowered. For the PSCT here, firstly remind, that words are capitalized after colons. Furthermore modern cards no longer use the term "Graveyard" but just its abbreviation "GY". Also the condition for the obstructive effects might seem gramatically correct, but on a second thought it seems like a trigger, and since continuous effects cannot be triggered, you should use this wording:

I also made the Tributing part a proper cost (using a semicolon), since effects don't usually Tribute cards and I assumed you intended it to be a cost.

Pretty much all of the above PSCT complaints also apply to Fragile Eye. This one seems to be alot stronger to be honest. If you actually manage to put two of these on the board (and protect them with a Linkuriboh or something), which seems accessible in a Level 1 Spam Deck, and also get the monster negate effect on, this basically means a turn skip for your opponent, except if they play a very trap-heavy Deck. I mean VFD alone is huge in the current meta, but this is also a built-in Secret Village. Change the VFD-ish effect to something going second related, just like Sick Eye's destruction effect, and this is perfecty balanced.

Blind Magician is a little bit weird to me, as it doesn't really follow a clear concept. Maybe you just messed the wording up a little bit, but it seems like this does the same as Fragile Eye, but worse. It states "you can negate all monster effects activated on your opponent's field", which leaves a bit space for interpretation. I'd understand this as "negate all monster effects activated on your opponent's field until the End Phase", which does save you from further interruptions, but I think your opponent would have already used his interruptions at the point you are summoning this card. Also since it's not a Quick Effect, this would not prevent your opponent from doing anything during his own turn, except if it was meant to be "until your opponent's next End Phase", as which it would again be a pretty broken effect, which calls for the banhammer (I'm looking at you VFD). To be honest I'd have expected something like:

With something like that, the archetype should feel much less clunky when playing and also maybe stand a solid chance against the current meta. By the way here's your correct Contact Fusion PSCT:

I don't know if you also intended this card to be summonable with Polymerization, but this "Must first..." surpasses the summon limitation of Extra Deck monsters, so you could also revive it with cards like Monster Reborn after using the contact fusion condition.

All in all the archetype provides an interesting theme, but I don't really think that playing with or against it would create a pleasant (interactive) game.

Greets,
Messoras

Thank you so much Messoras! Your reply was very informative and helpful. Thank you for helping me correct the effect grammar on these cards. I am going to go ahead and execute all of the suggestions that you made. Here are a couple of clarifications that I have:

- Combined Eye's coin toss is like a gamble: Sick Eye is supposed to be the worse option, while Fragile Eye is the better option. I originally thought of giving Sick Eye an effect that was detrimental to both players and Fragile Eye an effect that was helpful to both players, but then I came up with the idea for Blind Magician, so I scrapped it. Now Sick Eye is focused on blocking traps and Fragile Eye blocks Spells.

- Blind Magician's summoning condition was based off of Blue Eyes Twin Burst Dragon because I liked the idea of having the option to either special summoning him by tributing the monsters on your field or by using Polymerization to tribute the cards directly from your hand.

I'm gonna change Blind Magician's effect so that he's more reliant on Fragile and Sick Eye. I really appreciate your feedback!

Also a question that I have is what would make a card more interactive?

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Honestly, these card artworks are sick. Impressive work my guy.

I think this wording should do best for the Magician:

Quote

Must be either Fusion Summoned, or Special Summoned by sending the above monsters you control to the GY (in which case you do not use "Polymerization").

I still think that Fragile Eye's VFD effect is pretty broken and no card should prevent your opponent from playing spells AND monsters. In this context I will also answer your question. I'd call a game interactive, if both player's get to play and the gamestate goes back and forth. I also meant to apply that term to the playstyle of the cards. I like to cite Traptrix Rafflesia as a good example for interactive (and innovative) boss monsters. Many custom boss monsters pretty much all look the same, like "Cannot be targeted by card effects. Once per turn, when your opponent activates whatever: You can negate the activation and destroy it. Once per turn: You can do something archetype related" Traptrix Rafflesia actually interrupts the opponent by using other archetypal cards, namely normal Hole Trap Cards. One of the things I usually aim for when making custom cards is making them as little generic as possible, while still trying to give them some versatility. Decks that can be played in many different ways are usually much more fun than just the standard Virtual World spam into VFD stuff.

For your archetype the playstyle would pretty much be: Try spamming out 2 Fragile Eyes to use the effect and disable 80% (Monster Cards) of all the viable cards currently in the game, then, if possible, try setting up 2 face-up Fragile Eyes to disable the remaining 20% (Spell Cards). You will have to use non-archetypal cards to set this up and that will probably not leave much space for other ways to play the deck.

To make it more interactive. I'd probably create some other condition that has to be met, to prevent the opponent from playing and add some cards to fulfil that condition, aswell as interact with each other. Look at The Fabled Unicore for example, which continuously negates and destroys cards but only if you have the same amount of cards in the hand as your opponent. "Your opponent cannot activate ..." is always a little hard to balance, but if you change that to something like destroying or negating, you could probably go with something column related, like

Quote

Negate any opponent's Spell effect that activates in the same column as a "Blind Magician".

for Fragile Eye for example (Mekk-Knights intensify...), and maybe create a Trap that can change the zone of your Fusion Monster and be recovered with the Eye cards or give the Eye Cards an effect that allows them to swap locations with your other monsters. Just an idea to make it a little more interactive.

 

Greets,
Messoras

Edited by Messoras
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I think I have a better understanding on what makes a card interactive. I'm gonna think of a way to make Fragile Eye less broken without messing up its key element. Again, I really appreciate the advice!

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Okay, so I've decided to give each of the eyes spell counter-like effects. I think this has buffed Sick Eye a bit and nerfed Fragile Eye a bit. I ran through some situations, and best case scenario, Sick Eye can destroy all Traps and 2 more cards on the field on top of that. Fragile Eye is very limited to how many Spells your opponent activates. The only thing that might be a problem is perhaps it gets unbalanced once Blind Magician enters the field. I tried my best to keep the grammar correct, but I suspect I messed up somewhere. The column idea is very interesting, and I might do something with that in the future.

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