[NEW] FIEND

[Wanderley]

I make this card for a contest, but i need comment to know the card is good^^

 

Rabe - Cursed Fiend Bird Warrior

[align=center]

When you Tribute Summoned this card, pay 500 Life Points. Each time this card inflicts battle Damage to your opponent, pay 500 Life Points and Special Summon 1 Fiend-Type with 1500 ATK or less. When this card is destroyed by battle or by a Trap Card, Special Summom 1 "Cursed Token" (DARK/Level 3/Fiend-Type/ATK 1500/DEF 300) this token cannot attack directly.[/align]

 

comment/rate/help/

[awesomeuser]

Try using proper capitalization. Missing a period before final sentence.

 

9/10

[Azerty-of-KoL]

You also missed the "e" in tribute.

[Wanderley]

thank you *fixed*

[Doom_Shaman]

smexy...

 

10/10

[Wanderley]

thank you^^

[Enrise]

For a second, I saw Rape instead of Rabe, <.<

Pretty good though, I don't really like the 2550, part, could either make it 2600 or 2500.

Don't really have to do that, just that you see cards with ATK like that these days.

[Wanderley]

^^thank you for your comment and tip^^

[awesomeuser]

For a second' date=' I saw Rape instead of Rabe, <.<

Pretty good though, I don't really like the 2550, part, could either make it 2600 or 2500.

Don't really have to do that, just that you see cards with ATK like that these days.

[/quote']

 

Where's the fun without that?

[OhHerro]

When you Tribute Summoned this card, pay 500 Life Points.

 

Either change to:

 

When you Tribute Summon this card, pay 500 LP.

 

OR Pay 500 LP to Tribute Summon this card.

 

 

Each time this card inflicts battle Damage to your opponent, pay 500 Life Points and Special Summon 1 Fiend-Type with 1500 ATK or less.

 

Are you trying to give the option of doing so or is it required?

 

When this card is destroyed by battle or by a Trap Card, Special Summom 1 "Cursed Token" (DARK/Level 3/Fiend-Type/ATK-1500/DEF-300). This token cannot attack directly.

 

Edits in bold.

 

And I don't know if I want to say this card is broken or not, because odds are if you are getting an attack off with this card that damages your opponent's LP, there's a good chance that they'll have an open field. Summoning a monster with 1500ATK or less gives you the opportunity to attack again and deal up to 1500 in the same attack phase.

 

First of all, make it so that the monster you summon is in Defense position, and maybe even lower the ATK of the card to around 2400.

 

It's pretty solid though.