Huntar! Posted August 14, 2009 Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 The Knight and his High Horse~Prince Hunter There once was a knightBoth royal and blueBut his mind was taintedBad for me and for you He rode his horse highBut too high for his goodThough well intentionedHe did what he could There once was a knightWhose heart was quite trueHe set out to help himAnd do all he could do He talked to his friendTo try to fix thingsAnd stop him from himselfAnd to numb the stings The knight had realizedThe dark of his waysHe looked in the mirrorAnd regretted his days The knight was from thenknocked off his high horseThough as one might sayIt could've been worse. ----------------Some of you understand this perfectly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CeDeFiA Posted August 14, 2009 Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 I'm not one of those people.... o.O Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huntar! Posted August 14, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 Nope Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CeDeFiA Posted August 14, 2009 Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 Nope Do you like.... Dislike me or something? You seem to be negative towards me any time possible. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huntar! Posted August 14, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 i'm like that to everyone. Its not negative, if it appears so, my apologies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OMGAKITTY Posted August 14, 2009 Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 The rhythm feels off. "But too high for his good"Feels really awkward without "own" in there before good. I think I get the overall message behind this, although I'm guessing it goes a little more personal than that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huntar! Posted August 14, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 yeah, it does, but dont worry about that. I took out own, because adding "own" made that line too long. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enrise Posted August 14, 2009 Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 I wonder who you are talking about... Is it me? Still, it is a good poem. And quite a good one to give a message that people can understand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huntar! Posted August 14, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 Thanks Lucifer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enrise Posted August 14, 2009 Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 Thanks Lucifer I'm surprised you didn't catch the question residing in my statement. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huntar! Posted August 14, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 I did, and no, it isnt you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OMGAKITTY Posted August 14, 2009 Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 Stanza's 4 and 6 still feel really awkward to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huntar! Posted August 14, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 6 is fine, IMO. The second line in the 4th stanza makes it awkward. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Juuzou Posted August 14, 2009 Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 did you go to an intervention or something? jk, it was a good poem, though i do not understand it's contents. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cyber Altair Posted August 14, 2009 Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 Yes we do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evilhorus Posted August 14, 2009 Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 it was a good poem' date=' though i do not understand it's contents.[/quote'] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Posted August 14, 2009 Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 Who dis 'bout? The night had realized Missed out on a K there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huntar! Posted August 14, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 Thanks for that catch, Dark. Not sayin. Altair, if you PM me your guess, and its right, I'll rep you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sid. Posted August 14, 2009 Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 Meh, i have an idea. I read every poem before i comment on them, so i'll say i like the flow, but some of the words mess it up, just for a second. Good poem overall though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dissidia Posted August 14, 2009 Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 I'm not one of those people.... o.O I must be his brother. 0.o Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huntar! Posted August 14, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 14, 2009 No~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pikachu Posted August 15, 2009 Report Share Posted August 15, 2009 Um, 'A looked in the mirror'? You mean 'He looked in the mirror'? Nice poem, though. ;D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brushfire Posted August 15, 2009 Report Share Posted August 15, 2009 Hmm... I'm surprised that I don't understand who or what it's about. Shame. Either way, except for certain lines (you probably know which one's), it's great. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huntar! Posted August 15, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 15, 2009 Sam, you should know exactly what its about. =o Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brushfire Posted August 15, 2009 Report Share Posted August 15, 2009 Sam' date=' you should know exactly what its about. =o[/quote'] Re-reading it an scanning for what it could be about, I've got it. Both royal and blue This and stanza 2 are what made it obvious. I can't believe I didn't get it before. D:<Baka Sam. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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