KindredTether Posted January 23, 2010 Report Share Posted January 23, 2010 Awesome nice prologue and stuff!This is alright' date=' but I must comment on the low Description and the rushed feeling of it all. Also, the chapters are a bit short. I read all of it them in about ten minutes, including the proulouge.[/quote'] Dude you must be a slow reader I read it in under 3 mins top that!:P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaisu Posted January 23, 2010 Report Share Posted January 23, 2010 And did you get it all? As for the new chapter, it's still a bit fast paced. I'm a bit confused, to be honest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twig Posted January 23, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 23, 2010 And did you get it all? As for the new chapter' date=' it's still a bit [b']1)[/b]fast paced. I'm a bit 2)confused, to be honest. 1)Why, the battle with Mamoswine wasn't long enough?2)What's confusing? D: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaisu Posted January 24, 2010 Report Share Posted January 24, 2010 All the characters just popping up.That's one reason why it's a bit fast-paced. As for the Battle, I guess you could only make it a couple lines longer than that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eury Posted January 24, 2010 Report Share Posted January 24, 2010 Ice got Eevee and Sableye out You meant Leo right? Anyways, it was good, but a little fast paced, as stated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twig Posted January 24, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 24, 2010 Oh woops. *goes to the chapter to fix* Edit: Fixed. Anyways, it's only my second fanfic.(my first one failed miserably)I'm still learning. I'll try to slow it down even more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smear Posted January 25, 2010 Report Share Posted January 25, 2010 Oh woops. *goes to the chapter to fix* Edit: Fixed. Anyways' date=' it's only my second fanfic.(my first one failed miserably)I'm still learning. I'll try to slow it down even more.[/quote'] I've only made 1. But thinking about bringing it back. Anywayz, I like Chapter 4. Black blood. o_OReturn the Shadow Mamoswine back to its Shadow Ball? xD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twig Posted January 27, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 27, 2010 Expect Chapter 5 not not any time sooner. I've been busy... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.:Abarai Renji:. Posted January 28, 2010 Report Share Posted January 28, 2010 Nice chapters so far... BUT WHERE IS MY CHAR? D= Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twig Posted January 28, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 28, 2010 I have been noted that my chapters are too fast paced. I've slowed it down. By the way, your characters are in chapter 5. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twig Posted February 1, 2010 Author Report Share Posted February 1, 2010 Don't you hate Writer's Block? So yeah...It took a while, but chapter 5 is here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaisu Posted February 1, 2010 Report Share Posted February 1, 2010 Tell me about it. Anyways, I'll read. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smear Posted February 1, 2010 Report Share Posted February 1, 2010 Don't you hate Writer's Block? So yeah...It took a while' date=' but chapter 5 is here.[/quote'] ... Please. Never. Use. Jonas. Brothers. Reference. Ever. Again..D: Awesome chapter.Loved the Cliffhanger. ;D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.:Abarai Renji:. Posted February 1, 2010 Report Share Posted February 1, 2010 Although I didn't get to see much of Drake in person, this chapter was good. Keep on doing it! ^_^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twig Posted February 1, 2010 Author Report Share Posted February 1, 2010 Don't you hate Writer's Block? So yeah...It took a while' date=' but chapter 5 is here.[/quote'] ... Please. Never. Use. Jonas. Brothers. Reference. Ever. Again..D: Awesome chapter.Loved the Cliffhanger. ;D That wasn't a Jonas Brothers reference. I don't get what you said... Although I didn't get to see much of Drake in person' date=' this chapter was good. Keep on doing it! ^_^[/quote'] Thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.:Abarai Renji:. Posted February 1, 2010 Report Share Posted February 1, 2010 Smeargle is a random person. Maybe even more random than me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smear Posted February 2, 2010 Report Share Posted February 2, 2010 Don't you hate Writer's Block? So yeah...It took a while' date=' but chapter 5 is here.[/quote'] ... Please. Never. Use. Jonas. Brothers. Reference. Ever. Again..D: Awesome chapter.Loved the Cliffhanger. ;D That wasn't a Jonas Brothers reference. I don't get what you said... Although I didn't get to see much of Drake in person' date=' this chapter was good. Keep on doing it! ^_^[/quote'] Thanks.Good xD Smeargle is a random person. Maybe even more random than me. Yerp.i haz dem speshal powahz! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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