Flame Empress

[Ezazel]

My first posted card. Plz comment! XD

[img]http://img28.imageshack.us/img28/6702/255451.jpg[/img]

Description:
Increase the ATK of this monster by 200 points for each FIRE type monster on your side of the field. Once per turn, you may special summon one Flame Spirit Token (FIRE: ATK/ 0 DEF/ 0) on your side of the field in face up defense posistion.

[snowyash]

The effect is quite bland in my opinion and the card is quite underpowered, only boosted by the possible tribute/synchro fodder from the tokens. At best, during the turn this is summoned it's a 2400 ATK monster at Lv.8, which by most standards is weak, seeing as how it doesn't really have a "killer" effect.

It's not bad, especially considering it's your first card, but somehow, it would seem more fitting as a Lv.7 with another effect tied in to the Tokens maybe.

This is how I'd fix the OCG (Official Card Grammar):

Increase [b]this card's ATK by 200 for each FIRE monster on your side of the field.[/b] Once per turn, you [b]can Special Summon[/b] one Flame Spirit Token [b](Pyro-Type/FIRE/Level 1/ATK 0/DEF 0)[/b] on your side of the field in face up [b]Defense Position[/b].

All things considered, it's a 6/10 from me.

[Ezazel]

The tokens will play there part later. Thnx for the advice.

[Tenneko Kazeno]

This is very good for a first card. Nice pic, a bit underpowered for a lvl 8 but if your planing to make a set around flame spirit tokens then you have a great start. I would boost its original Atk up to 2400, making it 2600 when it hits the field and then 2800 when you summon the token which is much more balanced when combined with its effect.

As for the ocg, I agree with Skizo's rewrite, just change one to 1 and on your side to to your side.

I'll give you an 8/10 with the hope you will listen to our advice, make the changes, and continue to make cards.

Oh, I almost forgot. Since your a newbe, I have the pleasure of explaining spoilers to you. They are very useful when it comes to organizing your cards.

[ spoiler=A name ] your cards [ /spoiler ] just remove the spaces and you get

[spoiler=A name]

Your Cards Here

[/spoiler]