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finnally fixed my damn first cards ever


WTFauKorean

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ok so after a long butt time i finnally fixed most of the ocg error and maybe even made a few more while i was fixing them. If you do see those few more errors please, oh i beg you masters of the ocg to point them out. also tell my if there o'ped and all that good stuff. some of the art work is still utter poo. I added 2 more cards and took out about 3 and i also finnally got around to learning how to do spoilers T-T kind of late but now i can organize a 40 card deck slightly better.
now reply so i can kill you last

[spoiler=monster lvl 1-3][img]http://img715.imageshack.us/img715/1271/329618q.jpg[/img][img]http://img574.imageshack.us/img574/7536/329618o.jpg[/img][img]http://img37.imageshack.us/img37/2685/329618j.jpg[/img][img]http://img831.imageshack.us/img831/2685/329618j.jpg[/img][img]http://img831.imageshack.us/img831/3091/329618p.jpg[/img][img]http://img824.imageshack.us/img824/7536/329618o.jpg[/img][img]http://img831.imageshack.us/img831/1271/329618q.jpg[/img][/spoiler]
[spoiler=monster lvl 4-7][img]http://img822.imageshack.us/img822/7508/329618e.jpg[/img][img]http://img833.imageshack.us/img833/9167/329618r.jpg[/img][img]http://img705.imageshack.us/img705/2418/329618.jpg[/img][img]http://img705.imageshack.us/img705/3139/329618h.jpg[/img][img]http://img692.imageshack.us/img692/5729/329618y.jpg[/img][img]http://img251.imageshack.us/img251/9167/329618r.jpg[/img][img]http://img200.imageshack.us/img200/8577/329618s.jpg[/img][img]http://img574.imageshack.us/img574/6876/329618f.jpg[/img][/spoiler]
[spoiler=monster lvl 8-12][img]http://img692.imageshack.us/img692/8577/329618s.jpg[/img][img]http://img820.imageshack.us/img820/831/329618l.jpg[/img][img]http://img203.imageshack.us/img203/9568/329618t.jpg[/img][img]http://img692.imageshack.us/img692/5522/329618k.jpg[/img][/spoiler]
[spoiler=traps][img]http://img593.imageshack.us/img593/5729/329618y.jpg[/img][img]http://img573.imageshack.us/img573/7536/329618o.jpg[/img][img]http://img833.imageshack.us/img833/2418/329618.jpg[/img][img]http://img717.imageshack.us/img717/2418/329618.jpg[/img][img]http://img203.imageshack.us/img203/1271/329618q.jpg[/img][img]http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/4721/329618v.jpg[/img][img]http://img268.imageshack.us/img268/9656/329618m.jpg[/img][img]http://img651.imageshack.us/img651/2418/329618.jpg[/img][/spoiler]
[spoiler=spell][img]http://img257.imageshack.us/img257/4721/329618v.jpg[/img][img]http://img831.imageshack.us/img831/939/329618c.jpg[/img][img]http://img821.imageshack.us/img821/2685/329618j.jpg[/img][img]http://img692.imageshack.us/img692/1942/329618u.jpg[/img][img]http://img251.imageshack.us/img251/3504/329618w.jpg[/img][img]http://img268.imageshack.us/img268/2418/329618.jpg[/img][img]http://img715.imageshack.us/img715/9656/329618m.jpg[/img][img]http://img39.imageshack.us/img39/9167/329618r.jpg[/img][img]http://img822.imageshack.us/img822/3504/329618w.jpg[/img][img]http://img823.imageshack.us/img823/9568/329618t.jpg[/img][/spoiler]
[spoiler=fusion][img]http://img651.imageshack.us/img651/1396/329618z.jpg[/img][/spoiler]
[spoiler=ritual][img]http://img268.imageshack.us/img268/7828/329618b.jpg[/img][img]http://img696.imageshack.us/img696/2418/329618.jpg[/img][/spoiler]

lol ok that was ridiculous here is finally all 40 cards
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[quote name='SuperNarb' timestamp='1293857141' post='4902288']
Horrible ocg and grammar, 2/10 for the set, nice try though, I can see you tryed.
[/quote]


If you're gonna say "Horrible OCG and grammar", tell him what he needs to fix and where. You telling him he has bad OCG helps with nothing. Not to mention that the OCG in your siggy card is pretty bad. No offense.

Now then.

Please post card text in spoilers for easy OCG fixes.
You got some good pics, but I noticed one blurry pic.

I read your notice that you messed up, so I'll wait for your fixes.

I'm not gonna rate till the rest of the cards are up and the set is fixed.
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[quote name='Shion Kaito' timestamp='1293857570' post='4902301']
If you're gonna say "Horrible OCG and grammar", tell him what he needs to fix and where. You telling him he has bad OCG helps with nothing. Not to mention that the OCG in your siggy card is pretty bad. No offense.

Now then.

Please post card text in spoilers for easy OCG fixes.
You got some good pics, but I noticed one blurry pic.

I read your notice that you messed up, so I'll wait for your fixes.

I'm not gonna rate till the rest of the cards are up and the set is fixed.
[/quote]

lol thx for you pateince

[quote name='SuperNarb' timestamp='1293857141' post='4902288']
Horrible ocg and grammar, 2/10 for the set, nice try though, I can see you tryed.
[/quote]

its not eaxtly up yet but anyways yeah alot of the ocg is bad i was editing off of BT's help so im still not there yet

feel free to critique the cards ocg,o'ped,art work etc...
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[quote name='Flamingo Yeti' timestamp='1293859300' post='4902352']
Ok now that i can see the cards i think this deck is a bit over powered
[/quote]

thx lol you should have seen it before the editing zeratul had 2 sacrafice 7000 attack ill think about ways to balance the deck and this will probably be the last time before i move onto a new project
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You have quite a few OCG errors. I'd correct them, but my computer is being stupid in displaying cards when it comes to spoiler >.<

You do have quite a few blurry pics, but a few are actually not that bad. You do have a couple of Vanillas (Normal Monsters) in there that could use a bit more complex support.
Your "Protoss Archon" has a lot of potential, but...it has no effect >.> Add one and it'll be so much better.
Your Ritual is a Level 12 that only needs 2 Tributes and has quite the basic effect. Add more to the Ritual Spell, and maybe make your Ritual more powerful. The effort for Ritual Monsters needs to be worth the trouble if you're gonna Summon it.
Your Spells and Traps are quite basic. Add some complexity so that they can work together, potentially resulting in powerful combos.

I rate this

6/10

It's not bad, but...it could be so much better.
I understand that finding pics can be difficult, but the least you can do is work on your OCG.

Starcraft is Strategy, and Yu-Gi-Oh has that same element as well. Try to incorporate some kind of strategy to your cards, and I'm sure you'll do fine.
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First thing I noticed is that you need to capitalize their names, like "Infested Protoss"

Second, fake types like Hybrid are frowned upon unless you have a very good reason for doing it.

Third: Normal Monsters are boring.

Finally, the only reall OCG errors are things like capitalizing words such as Graveyard, Deck and Life Points.(Hand is not capitalized, seems wierd to me.)

Mabey when I'm able to read through all the effects I can give a better rating, but just looking at OCG it seems fine except for the capitalization and such, I mean at least you're using proper English grammer.

Quick edit, just saw your ritual and I think you mistook the Spell card for a different card, because I'm pretty sure you can't Special Summon a Spell...
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[quote name='Shion Kaito' timestamp='1293859828' post='4902373']
You have quite a few OCG errors. I'd correct them, but my computer is being stupid in displaying cards when it comes to spoiler >.<

You do have quite a few blurry pics, but a few are actually not that bad. You do have a couple of Vanillas (Normal Monsters) in there that could use a bit more complex support.
Your "Protoss Archon" has a lot of potential, but...it has no effect >.> Add one and it'll be so much better.
Your Ritual is a Level 12 that only needs 2 Tributes and has quite the basic effect. Add more to the Ritual Spell, and maybe make your Ritual more powerful. The effort for Ritual Monsters needs to be worth the trouble if you're gonna Summon it.
Your Spells and Traps are quite basic. Add some complexity so that they can work together, potentially resulting in powerful combos.

I rate this

6/10

It's not bad, but...it could be so much better.
I understand that finding pics can be difficult, but the least you can do is work on your OCG.

Starcraft is Strategy, and Yu-Gi-Oh has that same element as well. Try to incorporate some kind of strategy to your cards, and I'm sure you'll do fine.
[/quote]

thanks for the feed back especially on the ritual cards , yeah art work sux lol but i kept the normals becasue yes there boring but i wanted balance in the deck seeing that i never seen a starter deck with an effect for every single monster. idk if i can fit an effect to archon maybe have to look up more lore. definatly i want to elaborate on the complexity of the spell and trap cards. thx

[quote name='Metagross386' timestamp='1293859898' post='4902378']
First thing I noticed is that you need to capitalize their names, like "Infested Protoss"

Second, fake types like Hybrid are frowned upon unless you have a very good reason for doing it.

Third: Normal Monsters are boring.

Finally, the only reall OCG errors are things like capitalizing words such as Graveyard, Deck and Life Points.(Hand is not capitalized, seems wierd to me.)

Mabey when I'm able to read through all the effects I can give a better rating, but just looking at OCG it seems fine except for the capitalization and such, I mean at least you're using proper English grammer.

Quick edit, just saw your ritual and I think you mistook the Spell card for a different card, because I'm pretty sure you can't Special Summon a Spell...
[/quote]

hybrid thing ill fix now that i know lol, normals ill probably keep i have my reasons ill fix all the cap's ocgs and the tributes are probe and high temp isnt it? idk ill check. thanks for the feed back anyways ill get to it

[quote name='Flamingo Yeti' timestamp='1293860021' post='4902385']
keyboard error i meant 300
[/quote]

oh ok i see i have to think about it i might just but more lvl on reaver and put more sacrafices on him cuz in the game reavers do ridiculous damage
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The thing about Vanillas in a Deck is that by themselves they are useless. That is why people either skip Vanillas entirely when building Decks, or they put in a ton of support.
For your Fusion, look at a real Fusion card so that you can get the basic lore. The newer Fusions have more complex lore, so start with the basic "Monster" + "Monster" format. Once you get the hang of it, work your way up to more complex Fusion lore.

As for your Spells and Traps, have some to support your Vanillas in a way that makes them more usable. Don't just do basic stat gain, that's bland. Think of something beneficial to your Vanillas and find a way to fit it in a proper OCG format. Use other Spells and Traps for other purposes, examples include obtaining field advantage, hand advantage, keeping said advantages, etc. You have a world of possibilities.

I'm sure you'll think of some things for your cards.
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[quote name='Shion Kaito' timestamp='1293860789' post='4902411']
The thing about Vanillas in a Deck is that by themselves they are useless. That is why people either skip Vanillas entirely when building Decks, or they put in a ton of support.
For your Fusion, look at a real Fusion card so that you can get the basic lore. The newer Fusions have more complex lore, so start with the basic "Monster" + "Monster" format. Once you get the hang of it, work your way up to more complex Fusion lore.

As for your Spells and Traps, have some to support your Vanillas in a way that makes them more usable. Don't just do basic stat gain, that's bland. Think of something beneficial to your Vanillas and find a way to fit it in a proper OCG format. Use other Spells and Traps for other purposes, examples include obtaining field advantage, hand advantage, keeping said advantages, etc. You have a world of possibilities.

I'm sure you'll think of some things for your cards.
[/quote]

thx man ill keep that in mind i actually ment lore as in starcraft lore though in comparison with cards lol. but yeah you make a good point
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Tassadar is broken change it to something like
When this card is Normal Summoned, destroy all face-up cards that your opponent controls.

all of your trap cards are pretty broken especially purification agenda... that is VERY broken, burn decks will have a hell of a easy time with that card

-no condition
-all very good or broken effects

so yeah put more draw backs or make it weaker

your spells aren't AS broken, but some of them are still very broken, free special summons? wotisdisiduneven
and 1 other thing, you don't specify where you can Special Summon from

the fusion should be something like

1 "High Templar" monster + 1 "High Templar" monster

the ritual spell card is messed up, it has the effect of a monster basically.... u don't summon spell cards

should be something like

This card is used to Ritual Summon "Protoss Mother Ship". You must also Tribute 1 "Protoss Probe" and 1 "Protoss High Templar" from your hand or field.


there are lots of problems but at least you organized it a little bit more...
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[quote name='krazyxgamer' timestamp='1294026280' post='4908228']
Tassadar is broken change it to something like
When this card is Normal Summoned, destroy all face-up cards that your opponent controls.

all of your trap cards are pretty broken especially purification agenda... that is VERY broken, burn decks will have a hell of a easy time with that card

-no condition
-all very good or broken effects

so yeah put more draw backs or make it weaker

your spells aren't AS broken, but some of them are still very broken, free special summons? wotisdisiduneven
and 1 other thing, you don't specify where you can Special Summon from

the fusion should be something like

1 "High Templar" monster + 1 "High Templar" monster

the ritual spell card is messed up, it has the effect of a monster basically.... u don't summon spell cards

should be something like

This card is used to Ritual Summon "Protoss Mother Ship". You must also Tribute 1 "Protoss Probe" and 1 "Protoss High Templar" from your hand or field.


there are lots of problems but at least you organized it a little bit more...
[/quote]

hooray detail feed back thx man
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