Soulborn Mirages

[Lexadin]

[center]As the Topic description already says it's been quite a while since I last posted a thread here. So I've decided to redo loads of cards I once made for a contest in a new Pack (which is being worked on) named after this topic's title. So here follow the 1st 3 cards of the pack. It will be quite random so don't expect loads of new Archtypes and stuff. Mostly single cards.

So give me your opp on them YCM, so I can improve and or aprove them.

[spoiler=Z'Rak, Lord of the Ending]
[img]http://img717.imageshack.us/img717/9443/20638t.jpg[/img]
[i]This card cannot be Normal Summoned or Set. This card cannot be Special Summoned except by the effect of "Ultimate Reversal". This card cannot be targeted and is unaffected by the effects of Monster, Spell, and Trap Cards other then "Ultimate Reversal". Each time this card inflicts battle damage to your opponent, put 1 Ragnarok Counter on this card. When there are 5 Ragnarok Counters on this card, you win the Duel.[/i]
[/spoiler]
[spoiler=Ultimate Reversal]
[img]http://img852.imageshack.us/img852/8593/20638.jpg[/img]
[i]Activate only when you have 4000 or less Live Points, your opponent has 8000 or more Life Points and while you have no Cards on your side of the field or in your hand other then this card. Special Summon 1 "Z'rak, Lord of the Ending" from you hand, Deck or Graveyard.[/i]
[/spoiler]
[spoiler=Wodech, Embodyment of the Forest]
[img]http://img508.imageshack.us/img508/6507/20638g.jpg[/img]
[i]This card cannot be Special Summoned. This card returns to the owner's hand during the End Phase of the turn that this card is Normal Summoned, Flip Summoned, or flipped face-up. When this card is Normal Summoned, Flip Summoned, or flipped face-up, Special Summon 1 "Woodchip Token" (Plant-Type/EARTH/Level 1/ATK 0/DEF 200). The "Woodchip Token" cannot be Released or be used for a Synchro Summon. Once per turn, you can destroy all "Woodchip Token" you control to return a number of Plant-Type monsters from your Graveyard to your Deck equal to the number of "Woodchip Token" destroyed by this card's effect.[/i]
[/spoiler]

And before you guys start hating (which I know some of you will do), plz remeber that most of the cards where made a couple of years ago and therefor may contain flaws even though I tried to improve them.

Usefull comments will recieve a Rep.
[/center]

[Lexadin]

I can't say I didn't expect this.

[Knight of Emotion]

Pretty neat in my opinion.

[Lexadin]

Care to review them more accuratly?

[Mugendramon]

Long time no see Lex.

First off, I'll say there are little typos, which I'll point right now.

You wrote, at least twice, 'then' instead of 'than'. I'm not sure if this is a normal way if writing it, but I'm pretty sure you won't find 'then' replacing 'than' in the OCG/TCG.

You wrote, in "Ultimate Reversal", the term 'Life Points' as 'Live Points', in the first occasion. Since the second time Life Points were mentioned, the term was spelled correctly, it makes me think the first one was a slipping of fingers.

The third is not really a Typo, but rather misuse of number. When you refer to Woodchip Token[i][u]s[/u][/i] (as in 'destroy all "Woodchip Token[b]s[/b]" you control), you are supposed to mention them as plural, take [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Doppelwarrior"]Doppelwarrior[/url] as an example.



Now commenting on the cards themselves.

I must say that the first card disappointed me. You rewrote Vennominaga, and gave her a set ATK, and two extra turns to kill. I'm not really saying it's broken on itself, because it is indeed hard to Summon. But the card is not creative, effect-wise. At all. Picture is fine I guess. Name was nice.

The card to Summon [s]Vennominaga[/s] the boss is really unlikely to ever work. Maybe, just [i]maybe[/i], and with the greatest of lucks, you might be able to miraculously topdeck it after Judgemnt Dragon+somehow running out of hand. But hell, it's pure chance. "Ultimate Reversal" seems like a cliché name. Try something like [s]"Rise of the Ending Deity"[/s] Reversal Finish, or, if the White bird would represent that 'reversal', call it 'Faith Dive' or 'Faith Release' (despite of the still-present cliché-ness ;D).

The last one. THIS ONE could see some use. Although, to be honest, works inversely to what plants usually do. I suggest making it inverted-working. More like destroying the tokens to [i]Mill [/i]rather than to refill. Then this guy could be a re-and-ab-usable card. Picture looks good, but doesn't look like the original spirits. Name is lovely.

First too cards are far too luck-based combo and too worst-case scenario to actually see any use. So sorry, but as this is right now it is roughly worth 4/10, 5 at most. D :

[Lexadin]

Good review = Rep for you.

Well about the spelling errors, as above mentioned, I made them more then 1 years (possible almost 2 years) ago and I was quite a newb/noob back then, so overeading those in my corrections is a bigger chance.

Yeah, if I may be honest, that was my 1st contest card... 4th contest card ever made. So yeah, not quite my best work.

Erm, yeah its main existance is to Summon the above card. So yeah. Same as the above.

The 3rd one ages from a somewhat different and later contest. But anyway, milling can indeed be quite handy. Mhh, good suggestion. And about the img, it's based on forest spirits that take control of (dead) plants. And therefor fit within the mythology based Spirits.

As these are just "protoypes", I plan to tweek them some more and didn't expect a lot of them anyway. So I'm probebly changing some names and effects to be more intersting and usefull.

Thanks for your review though, it is really apriciated. Oh and yes, it's been a while.