SBS1 "Tenebris" Cards (Cause Latin is fancy)

[Archwing]

Allright, introductions first, Its been a good while since i made cards and ive never been very good with OCG.... So those two combined with the fact that im trying to make fairly original effects normally mean bad OCG and unlike most people i do care if my OCG is good, So if you could help with it and not just say its "Bad" (Im willing to give a [color="#00FF00"]Rep[/color] to anyone who can actually help)

[spoiler=Stuff most of you dont care about]The basic idea of the cards is that they are creatures born of darkness or shadows (Not really "evil"... more like ghosts) and as such require a sacrifice of dark energy to be created and cannot survive being exposed to light for a extended period of time (I thought it was a new idea >_>) I expect the "Tenebris" set to be about 8 cards. [/spoiler]

[font="Century Gothic"][center][img]http://img708.imageshack.us/img708/1368/121928p.jpg[/img]
[color="#800080"]This card cannot be Normal Summoned. This card can only be Special Summoned by sending 1 DARK monster from your hand to the Graveyard OR by the effect of a card with "Tenebris" in its name. This card cannot be destroyed by battle. Once per turn you can discard up to 5 DARK monsters in your hand increase the ATK of this card by the number of discarded monsters x100 Untill the End Phase. During the End Phase of your turn flip this card Face-down. If this card is Face-up when you start your Main Phase 1, send it to the graveyard.[/color]

[img]http://img156.imageshack.us/img156/7614/121928.jpg[/img]
[color="#8B0000"]Activate only if a monster with "Tenebris" in its name is flipped Face-up during your Opponent's turn. If the card were to be destroyed by a monster effect or the effect of a Spell or Trap card, negate the effect of that card and destroy it, Then inflict 800 points of damage to your Opponent's Life Points and flip the selected card Face-Down.[/color]
[img]http://img542.imageshack.us/img542/7614/121928.jpg[/img]
[color="#0000FF"]This card cannot be Normal Summoned. This card can only be Special Summoned by sending 1 DARK monster from your hand to the Graveyard OR by the effect of a card with "Tenebris" in its name. This card cannot be destroyed by battle. If this card were to be sent from your hand to the Graveyard by the effect of a "Tenebris" you can return this card to the top of your deck instead. During the End Phase of your turn flip this card Face-down. If this card is Face-up When you start your Main Phase 1, send it to the graveyard.[/color][/center][/font]

[MibeR]

Sure i'll help you

This card cannot be Normal Summoned or Set. This card can only be Special Summoned by sending 1 DARK monster from your hand to the Graveyard OR by the effect of a card with "Tenebris" in its name. This card cannot be destroyed by battle. Once per turn, you can discard up to 5 DARK monsters from your hand increase the ATK of this card equal to the number of discarded monsters x 100, untill the End Phase. During the End Phase of your turn, flip this card into face-down Defense Position. If this card is face-up when you start your Main Phase 1, send it to the Graveyard. >Discard 1 card for 100 ATK is way too UP, i suggest to raise it

Activate only if a monster with "Tenebris" in its name is flipped face-up during your opponent's turn. If the card were to be destroyed by a monster effect of the effect of a Spell or Trap Card, negate the effect of that card and destroy it. Then inflict 800 damage to your opponent and flip the selected card face-down.>>1000 would be more useful

[AsianGuy1137]

Cool concept - Tenebres means shadow or darkness in French/Romantic languages correct?

Anyway, moving on to the actual cards. They seem quite underwhelming considering you have to minus yourself to actually use them. The effect of the Monster is similar to that of Dark Crusader, but discarding 5 cards for a mere 500 ATK increase is completely disadvantageous. The second card is somewhat confusing. Why can it only be activated if a Tenebres monster is flipped face up? I can't think of a card effect that actually specifically targets and destroys facedown cards except very situational ones that people have given up using like Six Sam Irou and Nobleman of Crossout. It doesn't seem to go well with the entire protection theme because very rarely well it ever be used. How about just negate anything that would affect a Tenebres Monster in the first place?

[Archwing]

[quote]Discard 1 card for 100 ATK is way too UP, i suggest to raise it

[/quote]
I thought about 200 but then im sure theirs tons of DARK Zombie-Type monsters that get Special Summoned/returned to the hand/deck if they are in the graveyard or discarded... I could be wrong though.....
[quote]1000 would be more useful

[/quote]
Same as before, thought about it (And originally had it at 1000) but Seemed a bit much.... Mabey ill change that back
[quote]Cool concept - Tenebres means shadow or darkness in French/Romantic languages correct? [b]Yup[/b]

Anyway, moving on to the actual cards. They seem quite underwhelming considering you have to minus yourself to actually use them. The effect of the Monster is similar to that of Dark Crusader, but discarding 5 cards for a mere 500 ATK increase is completely disadvantageous [b]I was under the opinion that there were some zombie monsters that return to the hand if discarded but i cant find them so i might make a card that can be discarded to power up the ATK of Hicus and then return to your hand for the next turn.[/b]. The second card is somewhat confusing. Why can it only be activated if a Tenebres monster is flipped face up? I can't think of a card effect that actually specifically targets and destroys facedown cards except very situational ones that people have given up using like Six Sam Irou and Nobleman of Crossout [b]Any normal attack on a face-down monster has to flip it face-up. When that happens it acts kind like a FLIP effect for the Tenebris card.[/b]. It doesn't seem to go well with the entire protection theme because very rarely well it ever be used. How about just negate anything that would affect a Tenebres Monster in the first place?

[/quote]

Thanks for the comments, they seem to be rare these days :/

[AsianGuy1137]

The last part about attacking is not true, flipping only occurs when the damage step has already initiated and proceeds immediately to damage calculation. During the damage step, only Counter Traps, certain Quick-effects, and Quick-play Spells or Traps that alter ATK/DEF in any way can be activated. Besides, the card specifically designates that it only works for effects, not game mechanics such as destroying through battle. So that would actually render this card unplayable.

[quote]Thanks for the comments, they seem to be rare these days :/ [/quote]

Very true. I spent a long time working on my Flames of Eternity set, but it has yet to receive a single comment. Maybe we could help each other out like a community of people that design cards and try to help each other improve and stuff !

[gustaph80]

the only thing though when he attacks it not like you could just switch him into face down defense. so are u going to make a card to counter his weakness??

[Archwing]

The card says it can be activated at any point during your opponents turn, including the damage step so it would fall under the [quote]"Any card whose text specifically says it may be activated during the Damage Step" (the examples they use are kuriboh who simply says it can be activated during the Battle Phase and Nutrient Z)[/quote] So it works, If they attack with a monster whos effect dosnt destroy the card you simply skip to the 800 damage and ill have to add that it gets fliped back down at the end of the damage step. If its a Monster effect that has to flip it face up to destroy it then it can negate the effect and destroy the moster + the 800 damage and the flip face down ( So any monster whos effect is " destroy any monster this card attacks at the end of the Damage Step" would be able to trigger the trap, negating the effect and destroy the attacking monster) If the effect destroys it without flipping it face up then the trap dosnt do anything. However im not sure if spell and trap cards actually flip the cards before destroying them....

Or am i not reading/understanding somthing right? Like i said, its been a while and i trying to do an effect that i dont have anything like it really to compare to (That i know of)

[quote]Very true. I spent a long time working on my Flames of Eternity set, but it has yet to receive a single comment. Maybe we could help each other out like a community of people that design cards and try to help each other improve and stuff
[/quote]

Well it used to be people did that but now activity seems way down, has been for a while. Its late but PM me or somthing that well catch my eye and ill try to look at it tomarrow after school. (Sorry, its like 10: 30 at night and i still have homework to do )
[quote]the only thing though when he attacks it not like you could just switch him into face down defense. so are u going to make a card to counter his weakness??

[/quote]
"He" refering to?
If you ment your opponent-When your opponent attacks Hircus you activate Impetus to deal 800 damage and flip it face down + destroy it if it has an effect that would have destroyed Hircus, if they attack with a diffrent monster and you dont have somthing to flip it face down before your Main phase 1 it (Hircus) gets destroyed (Though there are going to be more cards that help keep it face down untill your Main Phase). If you ment When Hircus attacks its effect says "During the End Phase of your turn flip this card Face-down" (I should probably say in defence position though")

[AsianGuy1137]

[quote]So it works, If they attack with a monster whos effect dosnt destroy the card you simply skip to the 800 damage and ill have to add that it gets fliped back down at the end of the damage step. If its a Monster effect that has to flip it face up to destroy it then it can negate the effect and destroy the moster + the 800 damage and the flip face down ( So any monster whos effect is " destroy any monster this card attacks at the end of the Damage Step" would be able to trigger the trap, negating the effect and destroy the attacking monster) If the effect destroys it without flipping it face up then the trap dosnt do anything. However im not sure if spell and trap cards actually flip the cards before destroying them....[/quote]

I understand what you're trying to get at, but sadly it does not work for the very reason that it goes against game mechanics and only Konami has the right to ever defy itself. The damage step has a clear-cut set of sequences that prevents cards that need to be activated in direct response to something happening from being activated because the last thing to happen is usually the monster being destroyed. Floaters like Mystic Tomato activate at this time because their effects specifically designate what situation they can happen in by a trigger effect. I think some kind of textual revision is needed, maybe something like:

"Activate only if a monster with "Tenebris" in its name is flipped face-up during your opponent's turn. If the card is to be destroyed by a card effect, negate the effect and destroy the card. During the End Phase, inflict 800 points of damage to your opponent's Life Points and flip the selected card Face-Down."

I added the End Phase part because it makes the instance where effect damage occurs more apparent. Also, how about making this card more worthwhile by extending the last clause to "During the End Phase, inflict 800 points of damage to your opponent's Life Points for each face-up "Tenebris" Monster you control and flip all face-up "Tenebris" Monsters to face-down Defense Position."

[quote]Well it used to be people did that but now activity seems way down, has been for a while. Its late but PM me or somthing that well catch my eye and ill try to look at it tomarrow after school. (Sorry, its like 10: 30 at night and i still have homework to do )
[/quote]
I understand completely, school does take a lot out of you when you're not sleeping in class.

[Archwing]

I guess that would be fine but im gonna try and reword it so it still stops spell and trap cards, and i would prefer if it didnt flip it face down at the end of the turn because part of its weakness is that it only stops one card from flipping it face up.

[Archwing]

Ugh, monster pictures are hard to find D:
But a new ones been added while i try to reword the magic card.

[Archwing]

[center]~Bump~[/center]

[Archwing]

Bump

[Archwing]

Yet another bump

[Archwing]

Bump....

[Archwing]

bump

[Love of Ghibli]

I'm scared of the first one actually, since discarding isn't worded as a cost I could technically hold out till I get 5 dark world monster in my hand and swarm the field and he would gain at least 2000 atk. So I would suggest rewording the first one to say "to increase."

[ragnarok1945]

5 Dark monsters just to boost it a max of 500?

A little bit too low on that part

I'd have given it the base atk of 1900 instead or something

9.2/10