jolteon13 Posted December 28, 2011 Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 [img]http://img263.imageshack.us/img263/6222/63868v.jpg[/img][img]http://img534.imageshack.us/img534/9135/63868.jpg[/img][img]http://i.imgur.com/ct9rp.jpg[/img][img]http://img97.imageshack.us/img97/9135/63868.jpg[/img][img]http://img84.imageshack.us/img84/9135/63868.jpg[/img][img]http://img718.imageshack.us/img718/8158/63868n.jpg[/img][img]http://img684.imageshack.us/img684/9135/63868.jpg[/img][img]http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/9135/63868.jpg[/img][img]http://img840.imageshack.us/img840/9135/63868.jpg[/img][img]http://img252.imageshack.us/img252/9135/63868.jpg[/img][img]http://img828.imageshack.us/img828/9135/63868.jpg[/img][img]http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/2865/63868f.jpg[/img][img]http://img546.imageshack.us/img546/9135/63868.jpg[/img][img]http://img594.imageshack.us/img594/9135/63868.jpg[/img][img]http://img502.imageshack.us/img502/9135/63868.jpg[/img][img]http://img825.imageshack.us/img825/9564/63868j.jpg[/img][img]http://img860.imageshack.us/img860/9135/63868.jpg[/img][img]http://img202.imageshack.us/img202/318/63868c.jpg[/img][img]http://img17.imageshack.us/img17/9135/63868.jpg[/img][img]http://img804.imageshack.us/img804/9135/63868.jpg[/img][img]http://img155.imageshack.us/img155/9135/63868.jpg[/img][img]http://img407.imageshack.us/img407/2865/63868f.jpg[/img][img]http://i.imgur.com/szhEh.jpg[/img][img]http://i.imgur.com/4e1VJ.jpg[/img] I'm a bit rusty at the whole card making thing and I kind of want to see what the general public thinks of this card. I've just started going back and adding the newer terms and changing card text, so this is a sample of a card I made and tried to edit. Any helpful criticism is accepted. I'll put the lores here: Monsters: [spoiler/] Earthvine, Protector of the Forest: This monster cannot be normal summoned or set. This monster's effect cannot be activated unless 'Time to Train' is in the graveyard. Each turn, during your opponents Draw Phase, special summon up to 2 level 4 or lower monsters from your graveyard. Decrease this monster's by 400 to negate the effect of a trap card targeting 'Devil Brood' cards. This monster gains 100 for each players standby phase. Vassar: When this card is normal summoned, special summoned, or flip summoned, you can search your deck for 1 level 4 or lower 'Devil Brood' monster or for 1 'Doom Gate'. When this monster is removed from the field, it is banished instead. Aquos centari:This monster cannot be normal summoned or set. This card cannot be special summoned except by the effect of 'Devil Brood- Aquos'. 'Devil Brood' monsters are unaffected by Trap cards. Inferno: If this monster is removed from the field, special summon a "Devil Brood" from your graveyard in attack position except 'Devil Brood- Inferno'. This monster gains 400 attack for each card in your hand Victori: Discard one monster card from your hand. Special summon 1 level 4 or lower 'Devil Brood' monster from your graveyard. When this card is destroyed by a card effect, it is banished instead. Aquos: If this 'Devil Brood- Aquos' battles with a monster, flip a coin. If heads, 'Devil Brood- Aquos' cannot be destroyed as a result of battle this turn. If 'Devil Brood- Aquos' is destroyed by a result of battle, special summon 'Devil Brood- Aquos Centari' from your Deck or Hand. D.cay: 'Devil Brood- D.Cay gains 400 attack for each "Devil Brood" in your graveyard. When this card is sent to the graveyard, destroy one of your opponent's monsters with the highest attack. Earthvine: This card cannot be special summoned. When this card is normal summoned, special summon 1 Level 4 or lower "Devil Brood" monster from your hand in face-up defense position. Sempir: If your opponent has at least 1 monster on their side of the field, special summon this card from your hand. The turn this effect activates, this monster cannot attack. Once per turn, during the standby phase, discard 2 cards from your hand to special summon 2 level 2 or lower monsters from your graveyard. El Fuego: El Fuego has burned buildings to ashes and set fire to water. He has become a force of destruction. However, without his siblings, he is incapable of ripping open a new Doom Gate. Maji: Maji in ancient times has flooded the Earth and drove a man close enough to insanity to build an ark to get away from him. He can easily flood the world, yet chooses not to. He realizes he must find his siblings in order to rip open a new Doom Gate. Foraoise: Foraoise believes that she is not as destructive as her brothers, however she is very deceptive. She has used nature's creatures to deceive and trick mankind into making reckless decisions. With her brothers, she realizes that they can form a new Doom Gate. [/spoiler] Synchros and Fusions: [spoiler/] Ozuro: 1 "Devil Brood" Tuner+ 1 or more non tuner monsters This monster cannot be destroyed as a result of battle. If "Doom Gate" is on the field, this monster cannot be destroyed by the effects of monsters or spell cards. During each main phase, special summon one "Devil Brood" from your graveyard in attack position. This monster gains 200 attack for each "Devil Brood" monster on the field. Krokek: 1 'Devil Brood' Tuner+ 1 or more non-Tuners This monster cannot be destroyed by card effects. This monster gains 100 attack for each card in your graveyard and an additional 400 attack for each 'Devil Brood' monster in your graveyard. Your other 'Devil Brood monsters gain 500 attack and defense. If this monster is in the graveyard, negate its effect and special summon it to the field. Titanus: 'Devil Brood- El Fuego'+ 'Devil Brood- Maji'+ 'Devil Brood- Foraoise' This card can only be special summoned by banishing the above monsters from your hand, field or graveyard. This card cannot attack directly. During your main phase, discard your hand to search your graveyard and deck for one 'Doom Gate' and activate it. If this monster is removed from the field, special summon the banished monsters listed above in defense position. [/spoiler] Spells: [spoiler/] Doom Gate: This effect can only be used if only "Devil Brood" monsters are on your side of the field. Each turn, during your standby phase, special summon one level four or lower "Devil Brood" monster from your hand, deck or graveyard. Hell Fire: Discard one "Devil Brood" from your hand to activate this effect. Destroy all monsters on the field except for 'Devil Brood' monsters. Each player then draw cards equal to the number of monsters sent to the graveyard by the effect of this card. Forged Defense Against the Gate: This card can only be activated if 'Manifestation' and 'Crystallization' are face-up on your side of the field. Destroy all monsters on the Field. If 'Manifestation', 'Crystallization' are face-up when this card are activated, each player takes damage equal to the number of non 'Devil Brood' monsters in their respective graveyards. This card, 'Manifestation' and 'Crystallization' are banished after this effect resolves. Crystallization: This card can only be activated if 'Manifestation' is face-up on your side of the field. Once per turn, search your Deck for 1 level 4 or lower monster and send it to the Graveyard. When 'Manifestation', 'Forged Defense Against the Gate' and this card are activated, return 3 cards from your Graveyard to your Deck. [/spoiler] Traps: [spoiler/] Ready to Backstab: Each time a 'Devil Brood' monster is destroyed as a result of battle, activate one of the following effects: -Special Summon 1 level 4 or lower 'Devil Brood' monster from your Deck -Destroy 1 monster on your opponent's side of the field -Draw 1 card Manifestation:Activate this card during your opponent's Standby Phase. Once per turn, search your deck for 1 level 4 or higher monster and banish it. When 'Crystallization' and 'Forged Defense Against the Gate' and this card are activated, Special Summon 3 monsters banished by this card effect. [/spoiler] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DARKPLANT RISING Posted December 28, 2011 Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 You gotta show me the other "Devil Brood" for me to really judge the first eff, but one thing for sure. The ATK increase effect is rather irrelevant, and this card doesn't seem that good on its own unless the other Devil Broods revolve around effects that activate upon summoning. Dark Resonator does the job much better, and Dark Resonator sucks excpet in Resonators. IDK about OCG. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jolteon13 Posted December 28, 2011 Author Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 i had the attack higher and also the attack bonus from cards and you're right it doesn't make sense without all of the other cards but im still working on them now because the effects are outdated. and they have a sub-archtype that i'm editing now as well. ill put more up and two of the cards are in my signature as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DARKPLANT RISING Posted December 28, 2011 Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 Wait, so "Devil Brood" is an archetype? Not a singular monster? In that case, add "Except "Devil Brood - Inferno" to the first card. Otherwise it'll promote victory by Rainbow Life. Well, Colossal Fighter does that too, but at least it takes some stuff to summon. Anyhow, onto new cards. Aquos seems rather pointless to be honest. Why would I run this over Pashuul? That's another good Tuner that doesn't get killed easily. Not to mention it has good support. If you think by coin toss cards, Sasuke Samurai does it better, and just like Pashuul, can use various Warrior-Type support outlets. Doom Gate has amazing synergy with the 2 Devil Broods, given they'd most likely survive (something I like given that's proof you're actually thinking as you're making this set - people here rarely do that). It's also a +1 every turn, and being highly searchable, is a bit overpowered. However, this is the Gate-esque overpoweredness, not the Inzektor Dragonfly-esque overpoweredness. It's needed, and good card design IMO. Ozuro's a Level 9 Synchro, meaning that unless you summon him with 2 monsters, Trishula laughes in his face. Well, let's look at its effect. 2000 ATK is depressingly low, though 3300 DEF promises it'll never get killed in battle. It also has built-in protection, which makes it damn hard to take down. And given the only real Traps that will harm this used anymore are Torrential Tribute and the Solemn Trio. Doom Gate will be probably essential if this archetype was made real, so it'll almost always have its eff switched on. It can also +1 every turn. I'd make it only Level 4 or lower for the revival eff, though. Other than aforementioned flaws, archetype overall looks decent so far, and it's definitely a decent start-off for a new guy. The OCG is a bit off, but I don't really care about it either way. Pics are overall meh, so use these sites (I use them too): http://s825.photobucket.com/profile/JazinKay http://www.magicdeckvortex.com/art_catacombs.htm http://www.deviantart.com/# Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jolteon13 Posted December 28, 2011 Author Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 Making edits as we speak. Also, the edits are going to bring along new cards, especially for aquos and his new effect: SSing aquos centari. So sit tight as i use these sites to further edit these cards. EDIT: i made aquos centari's effect like that to stop Ozuro from becoming OP (think of it as if aquos centari wants to betray ozuro and they can't be around at the same time) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DARKPLANT RISING Posted December 28, 2011 Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 Victori is perfectly balanced. D.Cay seems pretty nice. If you have Doom Gate and this out, your opponent HAS to kill it, given otherwise they'd keep on swelling in number. Aquos Centiari seems okay, but the last effect seems pointless; I'd neg it. Also, it doesn't have a Type. Aquos is balanced, and definitely better. Sempir seems rather pointless. It doesn't have any synergy with the rest. I'd completely remake the effect - let's say the same summoning conditions as Great Shogun Shien, except with Devil Brood instead of Six Sam. And neg its cost and raise its ATK by 500 or something. Earthvine seems perfectly balanced. Big Boom has a terrible name, and you should change it. Its effect is a bit underpowered too, not to mention it's anti-synergy with Doom Gate. I'd make it destroy stuff except Devil Broods, and keep the opp's draw eff at 1 card. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ragnarok1945 Posted December 28, 2011 Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 can you write the lore out for Aquos and Ozuro? They're a bit small to read Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DARKPLANT RISING Posted December 28, 2011 Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 [quote name='ragnarok1945' timestamp='1325075194' post='5734189'] can you write the lore out for Aquos and Ozuro? They're a bit small to read [/quote] Writing out lore from the start certainly is part of RC manners, but if you can't read them that's your fault because you haven't bought a new pair of glasses. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jolteon13 Posted December 28, 2011 Author Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 bump. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jolteon13 Posted December 31, 2011 Author Report Share Posted December 31, 2011 bump Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jolteon13 Posted January 1, 2012 Author Report Share Posted January 1, 2012 BUMP'ed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jolteon13 Posted January 2, 2012 Author Report Share Posted January 2, 2012 bump Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jolteon13 Posted January 6, 2012 Author Report Share Posted January 6, 2012 BUMP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jolteon13 Posted August 11, 2012 Author Report Share Posted August 11, 2012 Bringing back this thread it's been dead for a while but didn't want to start a new one with the same topic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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