Lucas Maximus Posted February 23, 2008 Report Share Posted February 23, 2008 This poem took me 20 days and 20 nights to write, edit and be happy with, so i really hope you like it. I’ve seen the world with these two eyes.A movie played inside my mind.I’ve traveled the seas in half the timeWithout ever leaving home. I’ve spread my wings but didn’t flyI’ve touched heaven, but I didn’t dieHad the chance to ask God whyWithout ever receiving an answer. I’ve count the stars and made to tenLost track and had to start again.People laughed, but that’s how we make friendsWithout ever knowing their name. I’ve loved completely and watched them leaveI tell the story—some don’t believeLet them go or did you flee?Without seeing what tomorrow brings. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucas Maximus Posted February 24, 2008 Author Report Share Posted February 24, 2008 Bump. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VladAshram Posted February 24, 2008 Report Share Posted February 24, 2008 It sounds beautiful, but would make a better song than a poem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NP Sage Posted February 24, 2008 Report Share Posted February 24, 2008 I have a totally unrealted poem or rhyme. It won't make sense. I have a gunHis name is SteveWhen i see nunsI make swiss cheese Don't ask Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dryad Posted February 24, 2008 Report Share Posted February 24, 2008 @ NP Sage: It makes more sense then what you lead it to be :roll: @ Cyber Static: I can relate with what your poem means :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NP Sage Posted February 24, 2008 Report Share Posted February 24, 2008 @ NP Sage: It makes more sense then what you lead it to be :roll: @ Cyber Static: I can relate with what your poem means :) No i meant it dosen't have anything to do with anything. Don't use drugs. All I'm saying Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucas Maximus Posted February 24, 2008 Author Report Share Posted February 24, 2008 I'm glad you all, well, um, like it. O_o Thankyou very much for your opinions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kizzi Posted February 24, 2008 Report Share Posted February 24, 2008 O_ONice poem. I likez. Tis better than your other 2. ^_^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrazyKev Posted February 24, 2008 Report Share Posted February 24, 2008 Nice poemIt is very nice^_^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Careless Whisper Posted February 24, 2008 Report Share Posted February 24, 2008 You are one of the best poets I have ever met, great job...10/10 lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucas Maximus Posted February 24, 2008 Author Report Share Posted February 24, 2008 Thankyou very much all, looks like i have talent for poem writing. ^_^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Careless Whisper Posted February 24, 2008 Report Share Posted February 24, 2008 Apparently, have you considered taking to poetry contests? I entered my Raven Parody in the 2008 poetry contest on poetry.com, I'm a semi-finalist right now, sometime next week, I'll be getting info about if I'm a finalist or not.. here's the poem I submitted.. [align=center]Everday upon my after school hoursI sit in my room within the highest towerAnd in my room, I sit on my throneThe throne in which I sit in front of my hard-ware droneWith the vision of a corpse within my memory core Only this and nothing more. And on this hard-ware drone I sit in frontGathering my forces and resources as I prepare to confrontConquering land and mineral points with relative easeWith loyalty at my side I do as I pleaseAs my men charge forward they hear me from the shore "Spill the gore," and nothing more One-by-one my enemies fallUntil only one stands above it allAs my loyal men prepare to begin to chargeI click the button to make the screen enlargeThey shout a battle cry as they rush to war "Quote thy Lord, 'Spill the gore.'" With me as the victor and dominator of the worldI get out of my throne with a single little twirlI head down the steps to find something to drinkand finished with the drink I rinse it in the sinkand head back up to my chamber door because this is what I do, and none else more[/align] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucas Maximus Posted February 25, 2008 Author Report Share Posted February 25, 2008 Very nice poem anomu, i wish you luck on getting to the finals, i may consider entering a poem of mine. =/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ITI3L33 Posted February 25, 2008 Report Share Posted February 25, 2008 This is really good. It is even better than your others. 10/10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucas Maximus Posted February 25, 2008 Author Report Share Posted February 25, 2008 Ty D-Vader, i'm glad you like it, i did put much effort in on this poem. ^_^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nobody9999 Posted February 25, 2008 Report Share Posted February 25, 2008 Beautiful. This could be a real song. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucas Maximus Posted February 25, 2008 Author Report Share Posted February 25, 2008 Thankyou Sonic, i have recently posted my latest poem on the subject of space. ^_^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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