Rilou The Fire Lord prototype.

[ShinyMonster]

These cards are just prototypes of a deck im creating. the full deck will be posted in the "Finished sets" topic. Please rate my cards either,
0/10
1/10
2/10
3/10
4/10
5/10
6/10
7/10
8/10
9/10
10/10
and please can you give me ways to improve them.

[IMG]http://i48.tinypic.com/mv2fwl.jpg[/IMG]
Lore: "This card cannot be normal summoned except by removing from play 3 pyro monsters in your graveyard. When this card attacks with an ATK that is higher than the DEF of your opponents monster, inflict the damage as battle damage to your opponents life points"

[IMG]http://i47.tinypic.com/2mq6p7s.jpg[/IMG]
Lore:"You can ritual summon this card with the ritual spell card "Dragon Lock". This card cannot be destroyed by battle. Once per turn you can select up to 2 monsters from your hand and remove them from play. For each monster in your remove from play zone this card gains 500 ATK and DEF; if this card has ATK points that is 2700, you may sacrifice this card to special summon"Rilou the fire lord" from your hand/ deck."

[IMG]http://i50.tinypic.com/w4275.jpg[/IMG]
Lore:"Once per turn you can destroy one monster on your opponents side of the field; decrease this cards attack by 500 if this effect is used."

[IMG]http://i49.tinypic.com/20h0fn6.jpg[/IMG]
Lore:"This card is used to ritual summon "Rilous Slave". You must also offer monsters whose level stars equal 1 or more from the field or your hand as a tribiute."

[Sora1499]

Hey new member! Welcome to YCM! I'm glad that I got to critique your cards first.
I'll go through these 1 by 1:
*An outlet for Pyro monsters that would otherwise sit in the grave, and a 3.1k piercer. Not horrible, but I'd cut the ATK down to about 2800. The card's still pretty powerful, but not super dewper OP like DAD.
*It has the potential for super abuse in Macro decks. Just sayin. I'd cut out the pat of the effect that gives it the 500 boost for each banished monster, and instead give it 500 ATK for each FIRE monster that you banished with the effect. So, the card would look something like this:
"You can banish any number of cards from your hand, and if you do, this card gains 500 ATK for each FIRE monster banished with this effect. If you have 5 or more banished FIRE monsters, you can tribute this card; special summon 1 'Rilou the Fire Lord" from your deck."
That looks better.
*Dark End Dragon, except a lot slower. I'd make it a level 6 with 2200 ATK, for more usability.
*Ritual spell, not much else to say about it.

Oh, I'd give em 6/10

[Pepperyena]

Well then. Let's see if I can review these properly.

-Rilou the Fire Lord
First thing I noticed is the "Normal summon" cost. That doesn't really seem to work with me, since I haven't seen that in the official card game yet, but I guess it can work. I would assume it would be something like Special Summon, is what I'm saying.
Second thing, you don't have to write "Inflict the difference as battle damage", or anything like that. You can just write "This card inflicts Piercing Damage". It has decent ATK for a bit of a Pyro-based Archetype, and it could serve as a boss monster, though the OCG and summon cost may need a little bit of cleaning up.

-Rilous Slave
First thing: You need an apostrophe if you're gonna put an S at the end of a name for ownership. Thus, "Rilou's Slave"
Lots of OCG errors here. Other than that, I believe I can read the effect.
I'm kind of confused as to why it's a Ritual. I know this thing is capable of bringing out the sole monster, but having to have a Ritual Spell Card, as well...?
Its summoning condition is okay, though, but I have to ask - why 2700? Since its ATK and DEF only go up in multiples of 500, that would seem kinda strange. That would also require 6 monsters in the Banished zone, which you could theoretically summon 2 Rilous with. Perhaps include from the "Hand, Deck, or Graveyard", instead of just hand and deck? It would give this card more usage, since it's a ritual.

-Rilous Wolf
Well, this card is... kind of strange and I really don't understand it. o.o
It's random, is what I mean. Doesn't appear to mix with the archetype at all, and it's also a level 7 tuner. Well... Then.
Its effect is capable of being used more than once per turn through loops and whatnot, and I'd say it's relatively balanced if only for the fact that it gets lower and lower stats if you choose to use it. I suppose the only link to Rilou it has is that it's a Pyro - which is good, I suppose.


All in all... If you can edit them a little, make them work together, get a little more balanced, they could work in tandem to bring out the boss monster.

Mmm... If you really want me to rate, then I suppose I'll give a 6/10, as well.

[ShinyMonster]

haha ok thank you . I actually meant to put Rilou's Wolf a level 5. This was just a prototype though . The real cards should be here soon. Thanks for the feedback guys

i also just noticed that i have -23 warning points o.O!!!

[ShinyMonster]

bump

[Hermit Purple]

Rilou the Fire Lord - It's okay i guess. I find it to be slow since you Normal Summon it as opposed to Special Summoning, but then again, It can still be Special Summoned from the hand or Graveyard. The piercing effect also keeps this thing from being too overpowered as opposed to an effect that would've been much different. I'd say bump the ATK down a bit as well.

Rilous Slave
[quote name='Archlord Sora' timestamp='1352847420' post='6068586']
*It has the potential for super abuse in Macro decks. Just sayin. I'd cut out the pat of the effect that gives it the 500 boost for each banished monster, and instead give it 500 ATK for each FIRE monster that you banished with the effect. So, the card would look something like this:
"You can banish any number of cards from your hand, and if you do, this card gains 500 ATK for each FIRE monster banished with this effect. If you have 5 or more banished FIRE monsters, you can tribute this card; special summon 1 'Rilou the Fire Lord" from your deck."
[/quote]
Yeah i agree with this so much when it comes to this card.

Rilous Wolf - Flamvell Firedog Target? idk, probably no one would use firedog on this but then again, you could use to kill off 2 of your opponent's monsters. Effect on Wolf is okay, but i'd say put it's level down by 1 and lower the ATK if you choose to fix it.

other than some minor OCG fixes here and there, i'd have to agree with the others on this one. 6/10

[ShinyMonster]

thanks for the feed back :3^^

[ShinyMonster]

bump