My First 2 Cards

[DeathWielder]

Hey, it wouldn't suprise me if this has been way overdone, lol. But, I would like to share my versions of the second and third "The Seal of Orichalcos" cards. Important to note: There are edits in the description of the effect under the card images because I was too lazy to put up edited images. Read the description below the card, rather than the text on the image.

Just for starters, here is the Seal we have currently, which has been nerfed heavily for OCG/TCG use:
[url="http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20121005224735/yugioh/images/f/fc/TheSealofOrichalcos-LC03-EN-UR-LE.png"][img]http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20121005224735/yugioh/images/thumb/f/fc/TheSealofOrichalcos-LC03-EN-UR-LE.png/300px-TheSealofOrichalcos-LC03-EN-UR-LE.png[/img][/url]

[i]All monsters you control gain 500 ATK. Once per turn, this card cannot be [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Destroy"]destroyed[/url] by [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Card_effect"]card effects[/url]. While you control 2 or more [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Face-up"]face-up[/url] [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Attack_Position"]Attack Position[/url] monsters, your opponent cannot [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Target"]target[/url] your monster(s) with the lowest ATK for an [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Attack"]attack[/url]. When this card is [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Activate"]activated[/url]: Destroy all [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Special_Summon"]Special Summoned[/url] monsters you control. You cannot Special Summon monsters from your [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Extra_Deck"]Extra Deck[/url]. You can only activate "The Seal of Orichalcos" once per [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Duel"]Duel[/url].[/i]

And now, here is my version of "The Seal of Orichalcos - Deuteros."


[attachment=36083:Orichalcos Seal Deuteros.png]

[i]Activate only by sending one Face-Up "The Seal of Orichalcos" on your side of the Field to the Graveyard. Cannot be activated on the same turn as "The Seal of Orichalcos." This card gains all effects and conditions of "The Seal of Orichalcos" and is treated by that name while Face-Up on the Field. You gain 500 Life Points for each Monster on your side of the Field during each of your StandBy Phases. You must pay 1000 Life Points at each of your End Phases. If you do not, destroy this card. (The effect preventing this card's destruction does not activate.)[/i]

And, finally, here is my version of "The Seal of Orichalcos - Tritos."

[i]Activate only by sending one Face-Up "Orichalcos Seal - Deuteros" on your side of the Field to the Graveyard. Cannot be activated the same turn as "Orichalcos Seal - Deuteros." This card gains all the effects and conditions of "The Seal of orichalcos" and "Orichalcos Seal - Deuteros." This card's name is treated as "The Seal of Orichalcos" while it is Face-Up on the Field. You may discard 2 cards from your hand to negate any Card Effect or opponent's Attack. If this card is destroyed and sent to the Graveyard, remove all cards on the field from play.[/i]

Okay, so I am not sure how balanced they are. I nerfed the cards heavily (I'd like to think so, anyway) from the effect in the anime to make it similar to the Seal of Orichalcos, but I worry that they are still on the overpowered/broken side.

So, oppinions? Anything that might need to be changed? And remember, please be nice about any critisizm; this is the first post I have made on this forum, as well as the first 2 cards I have made on this site.

Oh, btw, the Tritos file was too large to upload for whatever reason.

[Miror B]

First: Cost needs to be send for each because they prevent their destruction anyway.
Second: I'll assume the "gains all effects" works.

Now to go on specific cards.

Deuteros: The life point gain is cool and all, but the cost of tributing a monster is pretty hard to do and means it probably won't see much play at all. Also if you don't tribute it and it tries to destroy itself, won't its protection just come into play and save it? Seems like a pretty big loop hole right there.
My fix ideas: Needs a different staying alive cost. Not much though because it's the Seal with some extra gain, I actually feel the cost of actually using the Seal (which can only be used once per duel in the first place) is enough, if anything the cost should be something dumb like milling the top card or paying 500 life points (Which you would've recovered I know).

Tritos: Y U NO HAVE IMAGE D: Also it being in play doesn't guarantee you 2500 Life Points. Also negating multiple attacks means you're going on 6000+ life point payment :/ If anything have it discard a card if you're worried about the cost. Not sure about the backlash because memorization always causes issues for people. I understand what you're trying to do but chances are you'll be losing life points as you gain them, meaning this being destroyed is insta loss, which is a pretty bad idea card design wise. Also, adjust the effect of Deuteros because right now, it's treated as just the regular Seal so Tritos can't use it for its activation cost.

Damn I haven't written so much since English class :/

[DeathWielder]

[quote name='Kevin the Bird' timestamp='1356982704' post='6107356']
First: Cost needs to be send for each because they prevent their destruction anyway.
Second: I'll assume the "gains all effects" works.

Now to go on specific cards.

Deuteros: The life point gain is cool and all, but the cost of tributing a monster is pretty hard to do and means it probably won't see much play at all. Also if you don't tribute it and it tries to destroy itself, won't its protection just come into play and save it? Seems like a pretty big loop hole right there.
My fix ideas: Needs a different staying alive cost. Not much though because it's the Seal with some extra gain, I actually feel the cost of actually using the Seal (which can only be used once per duel in the first place) is enough, if anything the cost should be something dumb like milling the top card or paying 500 life points (Which you would've recovered I know).

Tritos: Y U NO HAVE IMAGE D: Also it being in play doesn't guarantee you 2500 Life Points. Also negating multiple attacks means you're going on 6000+ life point payment :/ If anything have it discard a card if you're worried about the cost. Not sure about the backlash because memorization always causes issues for people. I understand what you're trying to do but chances are you'll be losing life points as you gain them, meaning this being destroyed is insta loss, which is a pretty bad idea card design wise. Also, adjust the effect of Deuteros because right now, it's treated as just the regular Seal so Tritos can't use it for its activation cost.

Damn I haven't written so much since English class :/
[/quote]

I'll see what I can do as far as the effects. See, I actually forgot some text on Deuteros and Tritos lol. I meant to put an "Ignoring this card's effect" clause so that the Seal cannot protect itself when being destroyed by its own or the next level's effect.The payment for negating with the effect of Deuteros definitely has a hole in it, and I will see what I can do to fix that. I'll edit them some and post again.


EDIT: I have edited the cards. Read the descriptions under the cards, rather than the cards themselves, as I have not updated the images.

[Miror B]

Still say "Sending to the Graveyard" is a better way of doing it.
Like "Can only be activated by sending 1 (card name here) you control to the Graveyard."
Point still stands about tributing a monster being a pretty hefty cost for a pretty meh card considering the requirements to use it in the first place.
Discard 1 to negate an attack seems a bit more reasonable but it's much better than pay a bunch of life points.
Also banishing all cards on the field might be used to the advantage of the user, but then again it requires 2 cards to play it in the first place so you can probably ignore that and keep it the same.

Oh and one nitpicky thing is saying "This card gains all the effects and conditions of "The Seal of Oricalchos" just to avoid the whole "Oh not summoning from the Extra is a condition so it doesn't apply"

[DeathWielder]

[quote name='Kevin the Bird' timestamp='1356985703' post='6107416']
Still say "Sending to the Graveyard" is a better way of doing it.
Like "Can only be activated by sending 1 (card name here) you control to the Graveyard."
Point still stands about tributing a monster being a pretty hefty cost for a pretty meh card considering the requirements to use it in the first place.
Discard 1 to negate an attack seems a bit more reasonable but it's much better than pay a bunch of life points.
Also banishing all cards on the field might be used to the advantage of the user, but then again it requires 2 cards to play it in the first place so you can probably ignore that and keep it the same.

Oh and one nitpicky thing is saying "This card gains all the effects and conditions of "The Seal of Oricalchos" just to avoid the whole "Oh not summoning from the Extra is a condition so it doesn't apply"
[/quote]

Oh. I never really distinguish effects and conditions, so I don't think about that. Thanks for that advice. As for the "tributing one monster" in order to keep the card in play, I didn't want it to be another discard effect, as it would become even powered as you would potentually lose 3+ cards a turn. If you have a suggestion for an effect in place of the monster tributing (other than discarding card(s)) I'd love to hear it.

[Miror B]

My suggestion was a life point payment which will somewhat counteract the Life Gain, but also means you have to have a monster on the field and retain it to make it costless, which isn't amazingly easy in today's meta.

[DeathWielder]

[quote name='Kevin the Bird' timestamp='1356987311' post='6107441']
My suggestion was a life point payment which will somewhat counteract the Life Gain, but also means you have to have a monster on the field and retain it to make it costless, which isn't amazingly easy in today's meta.
[/quote]

How does "You must pay 1000 Life Points at each of your End Phases. If you do not, destroy this card (ignoring the effect that prevents this card's destruction.)" sound?

The only issue is that you would be losing more LP than you're gaining, so Idk how that will effect the playability of the card. I imagine players might keep it around a few rounds, and then allow its destruction. Although, swarm decks would benefit, as they could gain over 1000 LP per turn to get around the cost of sustaining the card.

Idk much about the current meta. I usually just battle my friends, and we all use pretty basic, not-too-good decks. All I can do right now is guess at how the current meta would be effected, so I hope I am right in my assumptions.

Any other feedback for me, Kevin?

[Miror B]

With the current meta the only decks that would gain more life than they're losing are lock decks like Watts with Watthopper and the like. Otherwise just a minor Lifepoint Payment should suffice. 1000 could be fine though.
Also Swarm decks have to swarm and maintain their monsters to gain the amazing life, and the only really good one I can think of is Wind-Ups, which need the Extra to survive so this isn't even viable in the first place for them.

[DeathWielder]

[quote name='Kevin the Bird' timestamp='1356988539' post='6107454']
With the current meta the only decks that would gain more life than they're losing are lock decks like Watts with Watthopper and the like. Otherwise just a minor Lifepoint Payment should suffice. 1000 could be fine though.
Also Swarm decks have to swarm and maintain their monsters to gain the amazing life, and the only really good one I can think of is Wind-Ups, which need the Extra to survive so this isn't even viable in the first place for them.
[/quote]

I see. I thought Gravekeeper decks would be very benefited by this, but then I realized they really need Necrovally to be of any use, and although they swarm, they don't stick around long.

Okay, I am going to incorporate that 1000 LP cost into the description. If you could, I'd like another assessment of the newly updated descriptions to be sure there's nothing else that really needs to be changed.

[Miror B]

I still say sending instead of destroying would be altogether better but that's just me.
Let's get some other people commenting here (hopefully)

[DeathWielder]

[quote name='Kevin the Bird' timestamp='1356989248' post='6107471']
I still say sending instead of destroying would be altogether better but that's just me.
Let's get some other people commenting here (hopefully)
[/quote]
[quote name='Kevin the Bird' timestamp='1356989248' post='6107471']
I still say sending instead of destroying would be altogether better but that's just me.
Let's get some other people commenting here (hopefully)
[/quote]

Yeah. And I changed the description back when you suggested saying "sending" rather than "destroy". The description below the card is changed, bu I haven't changed the actual description on the card image.

It would be nice to get more feedback here though. You've been awesome, but 2 heads are better than one lol.