Snake Bandit (Zazu Zingle)

[Zazubat]

Just something I made randomly while helping a guy in Zextra's template thread. Anywho, I just made something up on the spot, and there's not too much thinking here. I normally use Judas' since it's nicer to use and looks a bit better.

[URL=http://s1077.photobucket.com/user/Zaziuma/media/SnakeBandit-2.png.html][/URL]

During either player’s turn: You can send this card from your hand to the Graveyard to target 1 monster you conrol; until the end of this turn, thart target you control cannot be destroyed by card effects. Once per turn: You can target 1 monster in your Graveyard; banish it, then add 1 “Snake Bandit” from your Deck to your hand.

[Sora1499]

I was a bit disappointed that it wasn't this guy:

 

[spoiler='Review']In its current state, it is arguably an OTK/big push-enabler. It is also an easy out to opponent's attempts at rearranging the field, executed in a mind-game-esque, veiler-style manner. Hand traps should be regulated, and I feel like this card warrants some regulations. Perhaps save only one monster at a time? That'd be the best course of action in my opinion.

The other effect is fairly benevolent, in that you have to sacrifice a normal summon to grab a veil. Seems fair to me.[/spoiler]

[Zazubat]

I was a bit disappointed that it wasn't this guy:

 

[spoiler='Review']In its current state, it is arguably an OTK/big push-enabler. It is also an easy out to opponent's attempts at rearranging the field, executed in a mind-game-esque, veiler-style manner. Hand traps should be regulated, and I feel like this card warrants some regulations. Perhaps save only one monster at a time? That'd be the best course of action in my opinion.

The other effect is fairly benevolent, in that you have to sacrifice a normal summon to grab a veil. Seems fair to me.[/spoiler]

The name was also random actually. It doens't make any sense to the picture other than the fact that it's a snake. I will change it to only work for 1 monster.

[Therrion]

ME GUSTA

Personally, I'm fine with it. At first I was going to suggest making it battle resistant as well, but that does go a tad far for a generic handtrap. It's pretty good. I can't see it being ran too much outside Lv. 1 Decks for its DARK Status (Get some Kuriboh/Relinquished Chaos up in dis bi***).

I do suggest however fixing your grammar. It's funny you are the OCG Police yet you always mess up Grammar as a whole. "fro" and "contorl" are not valid, good sir. Just nitpicking though, good card.

[Zazubat]

ME GUSTA

Personally, I'm fine with it. At first I was going to suggest making it battle resistant as well, but that does go a tad far for a generic handtrap. It's pretty good. I can't see it being ran too much outside Lv. 1 Decks for its DARK Status (Get some Kuriboh/Relinquished Chaos up in dis bi***).

I do suggest however fixing your grammar. It's funny you are the OCG Police yet you always mess up Grammar as a whole. "fro" and "contorl" are not valid, good sir. Just nitpicking though, good card.

 

As said, I made this in like a minute for somebody. That will happen. And, it's not really grammar, just typos, there's a difference :P

[Zextra]

You insulted me! *starts crying in a corner* :p

All jokes aside, I would like you to point out what I can do to make the template better. I mean, since I've already put in a whole lot of effort to make it look as realistic as I can, I might as well go all the way. 

 

Anyways, the card is interesting. Though it's a handtrap, which I personally despise for bringing unnecessary mind-games into the game, it takes the role without inheriting the game-changing or crippling effects that other handtraps present. However, the idea that it's basically a semi-Lance worries me, and can essentially push a potential OTK's consistency in a questionable manner. Nevertheless, I don't think it's that over the top, so it's probably fine. The second effect is quite nice, though, both allowing it to take its position as a Tuner as well as being able to preserve its first effect by searching a second copy.

[Zazubat]

You insulted me! *starts crying in a corner* :P

All jokes aside, I would like you to point out what I can do to make the template better. I mean, since I've already put in a whole lot of effort to make it look as realistic as I can, I might as well go all the way. 

 

Anyways, the card is interesting. Though it's a handtrap, which I personally despise for bringing unnecessary mind-games into the game, it takes the role without inheriting the game-changing or crippling effects that other handtraps present. However, the idea that it's basically a semi-Lance worries me, and can essentially push a potential OTK's consistency in a questionable manner. Nevertheless, I don't think it's that over the top, so it's probably fine. The second effect is quite nice, though, both allowing it to take its position as a Tuner as well as being able to preserve its first effect by searching a second copy.

I didn't mean to, yours looks good as well, I just prefer Judas'. Oh, and things I notice easily is the space between the lines of the effect, they seem too close together, the ATK and DEF values seem kinda off to me, the name font seems way too big, though I can probably change that myself. The ATK and DEF, I don't know how Judas did it, but he made it so when you write it, it makes it so it writes it from the right to the left, and in yours, it does it from left to right, which isn't how you would normally see it on the cards (see monsters with 0 ATK/DEF for an example of that).

 

EDIT: New version up.

[Zextra]

I was just kidding, haha. Nevertheless, your feedback is appreciated - and seeing how everything seems to be text-related, I can fix it all easily.