Lightsworn card

[Samurai BlaZe]

Just found a decent picture and i came up with this idea:

 

2 Level 4 lightsworn monsters

Lightsworn monsters you control cannot be destroyed by the effects of your opponents spell/trap cards for as long as this card remains on the field. If you have 10 or more cards in your graveyard, once per turn you can detach one xyz material from this card; special summon one level 4 or lower "Lightsworn" monster. During each of your end phases: send the top 3 cards of your deck to the graveyard. You must control this face-up card to activate and resolve this effect.

 

 

what are your opinions?This is my first card, be nice  :D

 

 

 

 

image from: http://hunduel.deviantart.com/art/Lightsworn-Crusader-182657137

[Zazubat]

Now, for the fact that this card is a Lightsworn card, it isn't that totaly bad. I have always dislike Lightsworn for basically being a luck based Deck, where it doesn't matter how you play, as long as you send stuff to the Graveyard, you can win. But since this requires a total of 20 cards or more for its effect, it is gonna take a little more time than others. That said, the fact that you cannot use any of its effects to put a Lightsworn in the Graveyard again is sorta strange. It is an Xyz Monster after all. The flavor is kind of bad. You see, all Lightsworn has this diamond in the background of their art. This doesn't. You can easily find some Lightsworn-like pictures online, so try to do that. The OCG also needs some fixing, so here's a fix:

 

Lightsworn monsters you control cannot be destoyed (I assume you mean destroyed, harmed is not a word in YGO) by your opponent's Spell and Trap Cards. If you have 20 or more cards in your Graveyard, once per turn: You can Special Summon Level 4 or lower "Lightsworn" monster from your Graveyard. During each of your End Phases: Send the top 3 cards of your Deck to the Graveyard. You must control this face-up card to activate and to resolve this effect.

[Samurai BlaZe]

Now, for the fact that this card is a Lightsworn card, it isn't that totaly bad. I have always dislike Lightsworn for basically being a luck based Deck, where it doesn't matter how you play, as long as you send stuff to the Graveyard, you can win. But since this requires a total of 20 cards or more for its effect, it is gonna take a little more time than others. That said, the fact that you cannot use any of its effects to put a Lightsworn in the Graveyard again is sorta strange. It is an Xyz Monster after all. The flavor is kind of bad. You see, all Lightsworn has this diamond in the background of their art. This doesn't. You can easily find some Lightsworn-like pictures online, so try to do that. The OCG also needs some fixing, so here's a fix:

 

Lightsworn monsters you control cannot be destoyed (I assume you mean destroyed, harmed is not a word in YGO) by your opponent's Spell and Trap Cards. If you have 20 or more cards in your Graveyard, once per turn: You can Special Summon Level 4 or lower "Lightsworn" monster from your Graveyard. During each of your End Phases: Send the top 3 cards of your Deck to the Graveyard. You must control this face-up card to activate and to resolve this effect.

ah yes, Destroyed was the word i was looking for it somehow must of popped out of my head and i used harmed instead, i will fix it right away and try to look for a new picture. Thanks!

[Samurai BlaZe]

Now, for the fact that this card is a Lightsworn card, it isn't that totaly bad. I have always dislike Lightsworn for basically being a luck based Deck, where it doesn't matter how you play, as long as you send stuff to the Graveyard, you can win. But since this requires a total of 20 cards or more for its effect, it is gonna take a little more time than others. That said, the fact that you cannot use any of its effects to put a Lightsworn in the Graveyard again is sorta strange. It is an Xyz Monster after all. The flavor is kind of bad. You see, all Lightsworn has this diamond in the background of their art. This doesn't. You can easily find some Lightsworn-like pictures online, so try to do that. The OCG also needs some fixing, so here's a fix:

 

Lightsworn monsters you control cannot be destoyed (I assume you mean destroyed, harmed is not a word in YGO) by your opponent's Spell and Trap Cards. If you have 20 or more cards in your Graveyard, once per turn: You can Special Summon Level 4 or lower "Lightsworn" monster from your Graveyard. During each of your End Phases: Send the top 3 cards of your Deck to the Graveyard. You must control this face-up card to activate and to resolve this effect.

There we are, i have done all you said and managed to get a picture with a similar background to a monster that would be a lightsworn monster  ;)

[Zazubat]

There we are, i have done all you said and managed to get a picture with a similar background to a monster that would be a lightsworn monster  ;)

Alright, you're new here, so a few things you should know. Do no post right after each other in just a few minutes, there's a reason why you can edit these thing. Secondly, don't have more than one card in the same thread, instead, just delete the other card, and post the new, improved version, third, you must post the lore, always, otherwise, it might get locked/moved and you might get a warning. Anyway, the new image looks fine, and the new text is good as well, so yeah, fine job.

[Samurai BlaZe]

Alright, you're new here, so a few things you should know. Do no post right after each other in just a few minutes, there's a reason why you can edit these thing. Secondly, don't have more than one card in the same thread, instead, just delete the other card, and post the new, improved version, third, you must post the lore, always, otherwise, it might get locked/moved and you might get a warning. Anyway, the new image looks fine, and the new text is good as well, so yeah, fine job.

Yep, gotcha i will try to avoid more posting and try to edit instead. Thanks for the advice, it helped me alot with this card B)

[Zazubat]

Yep, gotcha i will try to avoid more posting and try to edit instead. Thanks for the advice, it helped me alot with this card B)

Not a problem at all, and your first post looks like it should. Also, remember to read all the rules if you havn't, there's some specific things you should know.