Dark Vortex Dragon

[Rey07]

This card was inspired by the signature card of Jack Atlas: Red Dragon Archfiend in the Yugioh 5ds TV series. Let me know if this card is balanced, really put a lot of thought to not make it overpowered and capture the spirit and strategy of the Red Dragon Archfiend, but instead of an artwork and lore that relates to hell/fire, I decided to use darkness as the lore and artwork instead. Feel free to give feedback if you view this card.

 

 

 

[the_engineer]

You should post the lore (card text) below the card, otherwise it can be hard to read the lines in the card, also we will be able to correct your OCG (the card grammar) ;)

[-DG-]

your OCG could use some MAJOR correction, but more importantly, this card is SERIOUSLY OP

 

Possible new lore:

 

Make that joker 11 stars.

 

1 DARK Tuner + 1 or more DARK non-Tuner monsters

This card must be Synchro Summoned, and cannot be Special Summoned by other ways.

This card's Synchro Summon cannot be Negated.  When Synchro Summoned, cards and

effects cannot be activated.  When Synchro Summoned, banish all non-DARK monsters 

you control.  When this card declares an attack, cards and effects cannot be activated.  

If this card attacks or is attacked, at the End Phase: destroy all other cards on the field.

If this card does not declare an attack during your Battle Phase, destroy this card; you 

take damage equal to its original ATK. 

 

That's an attempt to make this card better, take or leave it.  this is a more star eater-ish approach, but it has a great effect to go with it.  More costly for more 

results, without the ridiculous OP effect.

[Rey07]

.happy you got to tone it down a bit. I said that this card was based on the Red Dragon Archfiend card in the 5ds anime which if I am not mistaken has 3000 attack and is 2000 defense and 8 stars. I appreciate your advice and I will change the stats and effects of the card but you don't need to act offended especially when I requested advice as to whether or not the card was OP in the first place. Anyway I'll repost the card and you can let me know what you think. 

[Rey07]

Here is an revised version of this card with changes to its effects to limit its OP. Let me know what you think. 

 

 

 

 

1 Dark tuner and 1 dark attribute Synchro material. Cannot be Special Summoned can only be Synchro Summoned with the above Synchro materials. This card cannot attack your opponent directly. When Synchro Summoned all non dark attribute monsters on your opponents side of the field are sent to the graveyard and banish all light attribute monsters destroyed by this effect. If you destroy a monster by battle destroy another monster on your opponents field that is in defense mode. 

[-DG-]

I'm not offended.  I'm just trying to help.

 

The reason I said 11 stars originally was that is star eater's ATK, an 11 beater.

 

 

Your new effect is much better, but it is still way to OP.  You have only the negative of not being able to attack directly, but the monster still wipes the field, and a level 8 that can do that without much sacrifice is still OP. the OCG is still way off though. Should look more like this:

 

1DARK Tuner + 1 or more DARK non-Tuner monsters

This card must be Synchro Summoned and cannot be Special Summoned by other ways.

This card cannot attack your opponent directly. When Synchro Summoned, send all non-

DARK monsters your opponent controls to the Graveyard; any LIGHT monster sent to the

Graveyard by this effect is banished instead. If this card destroys an opponent's monster 

by battle, you can destroy 1 defense position monster your opponent controls.

 

 

This effect is still OP because of the immediate field wipe.  Instead of not being able to attack directly, I'd wipe that and the field destruction.  Do something like a field wipe of the whole field if he attacks or is attacked, and if he doesn't attack, he needs a weakness, such as the one I suggested.

 

I am not offended, nor am I angry. I am only trying to help you get this card into realistic shape.  

[Rey07]

Ok sorry if I went to far. I am pretty new to this but I appreciate the advice all the same. This will help balance out the card and make it better. Thanks.

[-DG-]

no problem at all.  

 

A good reminder with cards is that they either should have a high summoning requirement or a negative effect to balance the good effects! It'll help make your future cards balanced as well!