Hasimird Posted May 13, 2008 Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 Hey guys, So this is it, my first realistic card of my first set on this site: Abyssal Rise. This set will be compose of, you aware, Abyss monster. Like the elemental hero and the rest, they'll have new abilities. Plus i'm creating a new Monster-type codename "SIN" So, this is the first sample of this future set of mine, who will be out someday, in a near future...At least I hope. Enough talking, more showing! I Like to thanx TrueVenom for it's magnificient Artwork!Every comment is welcome, say what you think, idk. Also, i Could need a little help for the name!Well...I do care, but I meant that you could say what you think, even if it's harsh! Also I'm fluent in sarcasm, so don't feel offend when I'll reply, it has become automatic over the years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ABC Gun Posted May 13, 2008 Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 The word Graveyard is always capitolized. Other than that you did an excellent job, I can seriously see this as being a real card in the game (or show). 9.9/10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hasimird Posted May 13, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 Thank you to point that out. I will correct it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phantasy Dreamz Posted May 13, 2008 Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 instead.... just state "Special Summon 1 monster from your Graveyard to your side of the field." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CinnamonStar Posted May 13, 2008 Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 Aside from the fact that I like the picture, you must write a disclaimer or give a link to the page of the artist you got it from.Other than that, you should work on your OCG and on your grammar in general, like in the name of the card itself. The correct version would be "Abyss", but I would also suggest you to find a better name. The way you put it sounds as if "Abyss" was a new type of monsters like the Elemental Heroes, which it is apparently not. I'd suggest you to change it into "Tyrant Angel from the Abyss" and then maybe add a name to make it more interesting. Also, it is "successfully", "one of your opponent's monsters, "1 counter", "Graveyard" and "on your side of the field.However, I think you also deserve congratulations for creating a balanced card, which is something not many new members do.On a whole that makes 8/10. I hope you'll continue the good work^.^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hasimird Posted May 13, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 Well my dear raven, if you had read my post, abyss (yup with 2 "ss", how can i flunk that...) will be a new type of monster, with also a new type of monster that i'm creating, called Sins monster. Plus I thank you to point my numerous grammar error (God, I do suck writing in english), and, sadly i did not post the name of the artist, since i didn't find it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CinnamonStar Posted May 13, 2008 Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 I actually read your post, but it seems that I misunderstood that part, which is why I said apparently... Well sorry then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chaos Impact™ Posted May 13, 2008 Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 image credit? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junk Raver Posted May 13, 2008 Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 Please read R-Cards rules 9 and 10. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hasimird Posted May 13, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 I wonder why I start to think that some people are definitely blind? Well, i like to thanx TrueVenom for it's fantastic artwork, that i have nobly use in this humble card. Now, can we pass to something else? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CinnamonStar Posted May 13, 2008 Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 No we're not blind, but we just like making sure that there are no misunderstandings.Well thank you for mentionning the name of the artist. The only thing you should do now would be correcting the OCG mistakes in your first post and as I said, you didn't mention that Abyss cards were supposed to be a new type, but you only talked about a new set.Anyway, if you do those things, it would be great^.^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hasimird Posted May 13, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 Raven, look a post 8, i've changed the OCG.Alson, how can i replace the card i've put in post number 1? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CinnamonStar Posted May 13, 2008 Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 I've seen that, but you should add the changes to your first post, so that people can see them.You only need to click on "Edit", cancel the initial card and put the IMG tags of the new one there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Black Rose Phoenix® Posted May 13, 2008 Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 I wonder why I start to think that some people are definitely blind? You just said that to a mod, he was only helping. No were not blind, and don't use that kind of attitude on YCM, especialy to Dj Osiris!!And your card isn't bad, so please don't use bad attitude in your own card thread, cas you can get some people who don't like the card(s), and some that don't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hasimird Posted May 13, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 Maybe that will sound stupid, but why i should treat people differently, no matter who they are? I don't want to burst the bubble of anyone on this site, but this is a Website.And I was thinking that American constitution prevail freedom of speech? Sigh... That being said, please oh mighty Dj Osiris, spare my tread from your godily wrath!Just kidding...? For those who didn't get it, it's call sarcasm. I know that I, most of time, abuse the use of it. So don't feel offend or whatever... Sumimase, plz:) That being said too, I like to thank everyone who comment my card or the errors, and God, who maybe exist, I know that I've made a lot! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hasimird Posted May 13, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 I ve update the first post, thanx to Raven. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chevalier Posted May 13, 2008 Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 Slight OCG Errors. Image is so/so. Good effort. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HelioSpark Posted May 13, 2008 Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 Not bad at all after the edits! good effort:D 8/10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alvarosv Posted May 13, 2008 Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 First of all, don't double post just make it all in one post. Second, don't be so rude if there is no need. Cardcreator is right. Some people will like you card(s) and some won't. I'm not telling you to treat people differently but do not treat them rudely. They're just trying to help you. They're not evil, perverse people that want to take your card away and eat it (I know it's a bad metaphor but you get the idea). Third of all, I guess this card is good but I see a mistake in it (by the way 9.5/10). When you say to add a counter you don't specify which type of counter which makes it an alone card and the other monsters with it may not help it get counters or have an effect the involves it's counters and you can't do trap or magic cards that are specifically for it or other monsters of it's type so they would have to be a bit worse than normal. This is a card alone like Breaker the Magical Warrior. If you specify what counter it is the other monsters of it's set could be powerful by using that counter and things like that. You get the third part (not being sarcastic or asking you an answered question)? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hasimird Posted May 13, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 13, 2008 I'm happy its not bad at all, but how can I make it better?And thanx to point the counter problem! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alvarosv Posted May 14, 2008 Report Share Posted May 14, 2008 Thank you but I think it should have 1000 DEF and then be a six star monster because otherwise this card is easily destroyed. Even if you equip it DEF raising cards it would still have a bad defense and would be beaten with cards that change ATK and DEF or change him into DEF position. It would be a bit better and it would stay longer on the field but then it would have to be a six star monster. By the way, my suggestion is to do a card for it that raises up DEF by pretty high like 1000 but of course, it could only be for this monster. Then I guess it's ok. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Typhoon brightness Posted May 14, 2008 Report Share Posted May 14, 2008 no pic credit, but otherwise good, looking forward to any improvements, XD- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alvarosv Posted May 14, 2008 Report Share Posted May 14, 2008 There is pic credit. Not the best one but... look under the card. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hasimird Posted May 14, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 14, 2008 Ehey Alvarosv, I've seen that my pic credit is not the best?What should i've write? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Valhalla God Odin Posted May 15, 2008 Report Share Posted May 15, 2008 ill tell you whats not realistic'Angel' being a 'Fiend'other than thatits alright Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.