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Demon Plains plz rate. new cards.


Bahumut

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This card cannot be Special Summoned. This card can only be Normal Summoned by Tributing 3 DARK monsters on your side of the field, including at least 1 "Demonlord" card. The Attribute of this card is also treated as FIRE. If this card would be destroyed, you may send the top 5 cards of your deck to the Graveyard so that this card is not destroyed

 

 

this is only the first card of the set. pic came from photo bucket

 

here's the next card. a strong level 4 monster

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the 3rd and 4th card demonlord support

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a card to help draw get those demonlords

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You want him to be Normal Summoned, but still be the 3-card tribute.. the OCG is really bad, so I can reqrite the effect here:

 

'This card cannot be Special Summoned. This card can only be Normal Summoned by Tributing 3 DARK monsters on your side of the field, including at least 1 "Demonlord" card. The Attribute of this card is also treated as FIRE. If this card would be destroyed, you may send the top 5 cards of your deck to the Graveyard so that this card is not destroyed.'

 

With the primary effect (summoning condition) it shows that the card should be strong. However, the secondary effect (stall ability) makes it sound as though the monster had low ATK.

 

You're making too many cool-looking, high-level cards, a mistake many junior YCMers make. Make some low-level cards, and some Spell & Traps that aren't complete field wipes, before you make cards like above (and it shouldn't be cards, just card if you get my meaning.. only 1 card like this per set, and the rest need to be weaker)

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You want him to be Normal Summoned' date=' but still be the 3-card tribute.. the OCG is really bad, so I can reqrite the effect here:

 

'This card cannot be Special Summoned. This card can only be Normal Summoned by Tributing 3 DARK monsters on your side of the field, including at least 1 "Demonlord" card. The Attribute of this card is also treated as FIRE. If this card would be destroyed, you may send the top 5 cards of your deck to the Graveyard so that this card is not destroyed.'

 

With the primary effect (summoning condition) it shows that the card should be strong. However, the secondary effect (stall ability) makes it sound as though the monster had low ATK.

 

You're making too many cool-looking, high-level cards, a mistake many junior YCMers make. Make some low-level cards, and some Spell & Traps that aren't complete field wipes, before you make cards like above (and it shouldn't be cards, just card if you get my meaning.. only 1 card like this per set, and the rest need to be weaker)

[/quote']

 

this is the strongest card in the set so yeah all the others are going to be weaker. thanks for the ocg tip ill fix it right away

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you rewrote the card effect for "Daalani" in text, but you didn't change the actual effect...

 

for card names, you need a space between the guys name and "Demonlord" (Ex: it's "Jawalzar - Demonlord" instead of "Jawalzar-Demonlord"). Your OCG is off in quite a few other places, I can't list all of them...

 

decrease Damor's DEF to something more like 2000 (with an effect like "Metalsilver Armor", you need to balance it with weakness in battle). Also, you haven't specified in your effect where you Special Summon your "Demonlord" monster from (the Graveyard, your Hand, Deck, what?). Fix those before I rate again.

 

You already have too many high-level "Demonlord" monsters, make "Dran" a 4-star and make the ATK increase 200 or 300 (depending on what you decide from the next paragraph).

 

Alright, you need to make a choice. The cards you've shown me make your set look like an aggro-style set (high-ATK monsters; ATK boost cards). However, "Damor", your coolest-looking card, has an effect and stats that aren't aggro... he doesn't support the strategy. Which do you want, a Defensive-style set or an offensive-style set. If you want the first one, then you need to recreate all of your cards except "Damor". If you're for the latter, then "Damor" needs to be remade into an aggro-style card.

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