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Things your parents should have told you..


Bloodrun

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Alright kiddies class is in session.

 

Our first lesson:

 

Things your parents say to scare you:

 

1) Never eat before swimming.

 

Conclusion:

Wrong! You can eat before swimming, unless you swim with your stomach, then your screwed. *Waning: May cause cramps and our several forms of rashes*

 

2) Don't make funny faces or your face will get stuck.

 

Conclusion:

 

Wrong! I make funny faces all the time, and my face never got stuck like that *Warning: Don't go to the zew and make funny faces, unless you feel like getting torn apart by apes and lions.*

 

3) Don't stare at the Micro Wave, you'll go blind.

 

Conclusion:

Wrong! you wont go blind at all. *Warning: Don't stick head in microwave and turn it on.*

 

4) Don't do naughty things or you'll get coal for christmas.

 

Conclusion:

Wrong! The only bad thing you could to do to possibly get coal, is to go to your parents room when you hear screaming. *Warning: Knock before entering*

 

And just one last word of advice.

People who don't brush their teeth on a daily bases, should never be able to open their mouth.

 

Cancer is a very bad thing. So make sure you wish upon all the people you hate =)

 

*Warning! Your teacher is not a whore, so don't call her one.. In front of her face.*

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My mom said "Your moving with your auntie and uncle to bel-air"

[/badjoke]

 

[spoiler=Dont look if you believe in Santa] one time my mom told me that Santa was real and that I he can enter the house magically. I was so scared that Santa would rape me, I booby trapped my room. Too bad my mom disarmed the traps manually the next morning.

 

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Guest JoshIcy

 

*Warning! Your teacher is not a whore' date=' so don't call her one.. In front of her face.*

[/quote']

 

Correction: I did have a teacher in the 8th Grade that was one. It (and yes I mean "It" as it was both genders/transexual) would work the streets in town every few nights...

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