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Granty Boy

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this joke goes against no one or no race... its just a joke

 

a black guy saw a chinese guy skipping rocks on the lake

so he goes over

he notice that each time the rock skips, it makes a sound

so he listen closely

"chin-zing-yong-ping-kun"

so he asked the chinese guy

"why does the rock make that sound"

the chines answered

"it tells you who you are and where you come from"

so the black guy picked up a rock and skipped it on the water

"chan-pan-zee"

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Man:God what is a million bucks to you?

 

God:That to me is a panny.

 

Man:Ok what is 100 million to you?

 

God:That to me is a 10 bucks.

 

Man:Can I have 10 bucks please

 

God:Ok you can have 10 bucks

 

OCC please post what you think of my joke

 

The better version.

 

Mortal:What is one million years like to you?

 

God:Like one second.

 

Mortal:What is one milloin dollars like to you?

 

God:Like one penny.

 

Mortal:Can i have a penny?

 

God:Just a second...

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joke's kinda long, but bear with me till the end.... youll laugh your a55 off...

 

so three guys went to asked god the change them into whatever they want right...

first guy asked, "can you make me into an eagle?"

god, "sure. all you have to do is jump off that cliff and yell out what you want to change into."

so the first guy walked to the cliff and jumped off and yelled eagle and chaged into an eagle and flew away.

second guy asked, "can you make me into a tiger?"

god, "sure. all you have to do is jump off that cliff and yell out what you want to change into."

so the second guy quickly sprint to the cliff and jupmed off and yelled tiger and turned into a tiger and ran to the wild.

third guy asked, "can you make me into a bear?"

god, "sure. all you have to do is jump off that cliff and yell out what you want to change into."

so the third guy ran towards the cliff, tripped on a rock and fell off the cliff and screamed...

"OH!! SH!T!!!!"

and so landed on the ground as a pile of crap.

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blonde jokes are funny

 

A group of blondes were willing to prove that not all blondes were dumb. They established a judges panel of people to ask the questions.

 

On the day of the judging the people started off by asking, "What is 59 + 2?"

 

The first blonde contestant responded by saying, "57?"

 

The rest of the blondes said, "Give her another chance, give her another chance!"

 

Then they asked, "What is 15 - 5?"

 

The blonde responded, "20, right?"

 

Once again the rest of the contestants screamed, "Give her another chance, give her another chance!"

 

The judges decided to go easier on her and asked, "What is 1 + 2?"

 

"3?" said the blonde.

 

The rest of the blondes said, "Give her another chance, give her another chance!"

 

 

LOL

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Im not Irish, but this is funny,

 

Joke:

 

Us Irish can't stand above 24 degrees, because if we go over 24 degrees are limbs go all floppy and we fall to the floor, just imagine a weather report on Irland saying,

 

Weather: Oh its gonna be a lovly 24 degrees outside

 

you would run into your kids rooms and go,

 

You: Kids, its a wonderful 24 degrees outside!!!!!

Kids: But dad its 1 o'clock in the morning.....

You: Yes i know but its 24 degrees, you may never see that temprature again in your lifetime in Irland!!!!

 

so you take your kids to the beach, and because its night its still pitch black, so when your about to leave you regret to say,

 

You: Son, where did you bury your brother?

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[align=center]Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

 

Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage.

We know this beverage as Red Bull.

 

What was going through the minds of Chuck Norris' victims before they died?

His shoe.

 

Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors.

 

Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice. [/align]

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