Where is all your LOLZ?

[Thesius]

I only have black jokes. =[

[Donquixote Doflamingo]

I only have black jokes. =[

 

I'm glad you didn't post them.

[Kizzi]

No joke in this thread have I even made the slightest chuckle towards.

 

YCM.

 

I am dissapoint.

 

This' date=' although Kizzi's was maybe a little bit funny.

[/quote']

 

holy sheet its larxene

 

I only have black jokes. =[

 

Are they good? If so, post them.

[Kitty]

 

A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.

 

On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."

 

"What?" said the puzzled groom.

 

"How can that be if you've been married ten times?"

 

"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

 

Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.

 

Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.

 

Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.

 

Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.

 

Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.

 

Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.

 

Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.

 

Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.

 

Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"

 

"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"

 

"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"

 

 

 

 

Why it's better to be a Woman!

 

1. We got off the Titanic first.

 

2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.

 

3. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.

 

4. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.

 

5. We can cry and get off speeding fines.

 

6. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central female figure in a computer game.

 

7. Taxis stop for us.

 

8. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.

 

9. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.

 

10. Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies ... (you get the point).

 

11. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.

 

12. We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay.

 

13. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.

 

14. It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower.

 

15. We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.

 

16. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.

 

17. We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.

 

18. If we have a zit, we know how to conceal it.

 

19. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.

 

20. If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.

 

21. We don't have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in.

 

22. We have the ability to dress ourselves.

 

23. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.

 

24. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.

 

25. Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask whether there's spinach in our teeth.

 

26. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.

 

27. We'll never regret piercing our ears.

 

28. We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

 

29. We know which glass was ours by the lipstick mark.

 

30. We have enough sense to realize that the easiest way to get out of being lost is to ask for directions.

 

 

 

[LiAM]

lol @ Kitty's jokes ;D

 

Prefer the second spoilers' jokes =3

[BehindTheMask]

Women's Rights.

[Eury]

BTM won the thread.

 

Sorry Kizzi.

[-Berserker-]

Why do women live more time than men?

 

 

 

Because they don't marry women.

 

 

 

 

Oookay. I know a lot of jokes about an ethnic group that most of you will not know, so I'll replace it with something more known; like... English.

 

The english joined the Space Race. They made a rocket and launched it. Everything ended as expected. 100 ft, 500 ft, 2000 ft, 10000 ft... and they ran out of charcoal.

[Womi]

lol

 

 

Why did YCMaker lose his girlfriend?

-Cuz he never came.

 

BTM won this.

[Mehmani]

Lack of funny stuff is 'cause the Mods are Nazis that attempt to round us up into unfunnyland before spreading a disease called Mediocrity.

 

Nah, not really. They're just a bit stricter nowadays.

[Dark]

Spongebob can't drive' date=' is yellow, and has a small penis. Who is he?

 

[spoiler=']

Asian

 

 

 

This was the only one that made me laugh.

 

But it was ever so slight.

[chairman ali]

I are sad. No one read my joke D:

 

WHAT HAPPENS WHEN A JEW WITH A BONER HITS A WALL?

 

[spoiler=]HE BREAKS HIS NOSE.

 

[Womi]

^replace it with a Chinese. ;O