WickeRogs Posted September 27, 2012 Report Share Posted September 27, 2012 Hello guys. I bring to you my very first set. When I created this set it was called Undead Set with a total of 45 cards. Today, I reformulated it completely: changed it's name to Deathless; changed some effects and deleted some useless cards. Please, tell me what you think. [spoiler='Monsters'] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50193.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50195.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50197.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50200.jpg[/img] [spoiler='Lore']This card cannot be Special Summoned. You can only Normal summon or set this card if you control no tuner monsters. You cannot control another tuner monster if you control this card. This card can only be tributed to Normal Summon or Synchro Summon a "Deathless" monster. While you control this card face up on your field, all "Deathless" monsters cannot be destroyed by battle(damage calculation applied normally).[/spoiler] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50202.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50203.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50214.jpg[/img] [spoiler='Lore'] When you Summon this card: If you control another "Deathless" monster, you can choose one of the following effects: - Return 1 "Deathless" monster that was removed from play to your hand. - Equip this card to another "Deathless" monster you control. Increase the ATK of the monster equipped with this card by 1000 during your battle phase only. This card is treated as an Equip Spell card. - Tribute this card to special summon from your graveyard(except "Deathless Goblin") 1 level 3 or lower "Deathless" face up on your field.[/spoiler] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50217.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50219.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50224.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50257.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50312.jpg[/img] [spoiler='Lore'] If this card is Special Summoned: put 1 "Deathless" counter on it. Remove 1 "Deathless" counter to activate one of the following effects: - Destroy one spell or trap card on your opponent's field(If the card is face down, destroy it without flipping it). - Chose 1 level 4 or lower "Deathless" monster in your deck and send it to your graveyard. The Deck is then Shuffled. - Randomly remove from the game one card of your opponent's hand. If his/her does not have cards on hand, remove from his/her deck. The deck is then shuffled. You can only control 1 "Deathless Magician" on your field..[/spoiler] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50315.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50453.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50466.jpg[/img] [spoiler='Lore']This card cannot be Special Summoned. This card is removed from play if destroyed by battle. If this card is in your graveyard during your Main Phase 1, return it to your deck(the deck is then shuffled). Once per turn, if you control this face up card, you can negate the activation of a Spell or Trap card that targets a monster in the graveyard and destroy it by sending 1 Zombie-type monter from your deck to your graveyard. This card cannot declare an attack in the turn you activate its effect,[/spoiler] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50455.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50474.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50485.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50176.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50177.jpg[/img] [/spoiler] [spoiler='Synchro'] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50192.jpg[/img] [spoiler='Lore']1 “Deathless” Tuner + 2 "Deathless" or more Non-tuner monsters This card can only be Synchro Summoned. This card cannot declare an attack in the turn it's summoned. Once per turn, you can discard the card in the top of your deck to destroy one card on your opponent side of the field. If you control another face-up “Deathless” monster, this card is unnefected by card effects. If "Unholy Ground" is face up in your field, this card can attack your opponent life points directly.[/spoiler] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50260.jpg[/img] [spoiler='Lore']1 “Deathless” Tuner monster + 1 non-tuner Zombie-type monster. The following effects can be only used depending of how many "Deathless" monsters you used to summon this card: 1 – This card is unnefected by spell and trap cards. 2 – All "Deathless" monsters on your field are unnefected by your opponent' Spell and Trap cards as long as this card remains face up on your side of the field.[/spoiler] [/spoiler] [spoiler='Spell'] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50490.jpg[/img] [spoiler='Lore'] Activate this card if your opponent Special Summon a monster from his/her: - Hand: Special Summon a level 4 or lower Zombie-type monster from your hand. - Deck: Special Summon a level 4 or lower Zombie-type monster from your deck. The Deck is then shuffled. - Graveyard: Special Summon a level 4 or lower Zombie-type monster from your graveyard. Any effect of the monster Special Summoned by this card is negated and you cannot tribube it to Synchro Summon a monster. You can only activate one Rise of the Damned per turn.[/spoiler] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50494.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50496.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50503.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50505.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50526.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50535.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50539.jpg[/img] [/spoiler] [spoiler='Trap'] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50186.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50189.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50511.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50512.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50524.jpg[/img] [img]http://yugico.com/customcard/50536.jpg[/img] [/spoiler] PLZ PLZ PLZ comment Hope you like it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sander Posted September 27, 2012 Report Share Posted September 27, 2012 Do you know that cards like Foolish Burial, Armageddon Knight and Dark Grepher exist? By the looks of the monsters alone from this set, you clearly don't, and that led you to make such a broken concept for the monsters which is so ridiculously easy to do with the cards I just mentioned. The most problematic monsters here are Deathless Swordmaster, Magician, Destroyer and Giant Orc. I'll explain why these are the most problematic monsters in this set: [indent=1]• Deathless Magician: Let's say you use Foolish Burial or Armageddon Knight, and you pitch Magician. In the case of Foolish Burial sending Magician, Magicians effect kicks in, Special Summoning itself, which in turn activates its counter effect. Now, the effect I'm talking about is the effect that allows you to remove a counter to send another Deathless monster from your Deck to the Graveyard, but the hand removal effect is problematic as well, but I'll talk about that later. Now, since you can mill any Deathless monster with its effect, who is to stop you from sending another Magician and then rinse and repeat until you have 3 Magicians on the field, plus another Deathless monster if you chose to use the second effect again.[/indent] [indent=1]• Deathless Swordmaster: Nothing really to discuss about this, other than what I already said before; it's so easy to Summon, ALSO the fact that it can be Summoned even when it's discarded, so you can, let's say, use Dark Grephers effect, pitch Swordmaster from your hand to send another Deathless monster from your Deck to the Grave (which would be Magician, as that makes so much spammy plays), Special Summon Swordmaster and then Special Summon the monster sent via either Dark Grepher, Armageddon Knight or Foolish Burial.[/indent] [indent=1]• Deathless Giant Orc: Same as Swordmaster, except this card is a 2300 beater out from nowhere.[/indent] [indent=1]• Deathless Destroyer: You call that a cost? A cost that let's you send a card from your Deck to the Grave, which would obviously be a Deathless monster to negate the activation of a Spell or a Trap Card? You know, costs aren't supposed to allow you to gain more advantage over your opponent.[/indent] Well, that covers the monsters, but there are still the broken Spell and Trap Cards that need to be covered: [indent=1]• Rise of the Damned: I just don't know what to say. I'm dumbfounded on how someone could design a card like this and not but any restrictions on it, especially when it can Special Summon any Deathless monster from your hand, Deck or Graveyard.[/indent] [indent=1]• The Frightened Corpse: In short, the card effect allows you to either Special Summon a Deathless monster from your Deck, or mill a non-Deathless Zombie-Type monster, which would probably be Mezuki. You know, this card wouldn't be bad IF you didn't make the monsters like they already are.[/indent] [indent=1] • Unfair Game: So let me get this straight, you made this card indestructible against any Spell / Trap removal just so you could guarantee that you could Special Summon a Deathless monster from your hand, Deck or Graveyard? And did you have to do for it? Oh yeah, absolutely nothing. So yeah, the card is exactly what its name suggests; unfair.[/indent] Rest of the cards are not worth to be mentioned, as they are either decent or just worthless. But yeah, all this set does is make already real cards make combos with these cards which in turn create more combos and so on and so on. Also, you have a wording issue. You don't say "discard 1 card from your Deck", you say "send 1 card from your Deck to the Graveyard". This reminds me why I don't like reviewing sets, especially when the sets contain cards designed to be broken. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WickeRogs Posted September 28, 2012 Author Report Share Posted September 28, 2012 First, thanks for the detailed review [quote] Deathless Magician: Let's say you use Foolish Burial or Armageddon Knight, and you pitch Magician. In the case of Foolish Burial sending Magician, Magicians effect kicks in, Special Summoning itself, which in turn activates its counter effect. Now, the effect I'm talking about is the effect that allows you to remove a counter to send another Deathless monster from your Deck to the Graveyard, but the hand removal effect is problematic as well, but I'll talk about that later. Now, since you can mill any Deathless monster with its effect, who is to stop you from sending another Magician and then rinse and repeat until you have 3 Magicians on the field, plus another Deathless monster if you chose to use the second effect again.[/quote] [indent=1]Yeah, you can choose a Deathless Magician, but the fact that you can only control 1 Deathless Magician on your field, stop it from Special Summon itself. But maybe it would be better if I just put that you cant choose Deathless Magician or take out its effect to special summon when sent to the graveyard.[/indent] [quote] Deathless Swordmaster: Nothing really to discuss about this, other than what I already said before; it's so easy to Summon, ALSO the fact that it can be Summoned even when it's discarded, so you can, let's say, use Dark Grephers effect, pitch Swordmaster from your hand to send another Deathless monster from your Deck to the Grave (which would be Magician, as that makes so much spammy plays), Special Summon Swordmaster and then Special Summon the monster sent via either Dark Grepher, Armageddon Knight or Foolish Burial.[/quote] Did not think of that. I'll fix it. [quote]Deathless Giant Orc: Same as Swordmaster, except this card is a 2300 beater out from nowhere.[/quote] I did Giant Orc with this purpose: A heavy beater that can be Special Summoned easily. C'mon, a Chainsaw Insect has 2400 ATK being a 4 star monster, but I'll do something about it. [quote]Deathless Destroyer: You call that a cost? A cost that let's you send a card from your Deck to the Grave, which would obviously be a Deathless monster to negate the activation of a Spell or a Trap Card? You know, costs aren't supposed to allow you to gain more advantage over your opponent.[/quote] In the gameplay today we have a lot of card with similar effects, but what I think that concerns you is the fact that, in a set like that, its cost would be to favor me. That as the idea when I created this card. The just change that I'll do for now is to put it as a 7-star monster. [quote] Rise of the Damned: I just don't know what to say. I'm dumbfounded on how someone could design a card like this and not but any restrictions on it, especially when it can Special Summon any Deathless monster from your hand, Deck or Graveyard.[/quote] I won't change this card for now just because it only works for this set. [quote]The Frightened Corpse: In short, the card effect allows you to either Special Summon a Deathless monster from your Deck, or mill a non-Deathless Zombie-Type monster, which would probably be Mezuki. You know, this card wouldn't be bad IF you didn't make the monsters like they already are[/quote]. Didn't understand what you meant to say here, sorry :/ [quote]Unfair Game: So let me get this straight, you made this card indestructible against any Spell / Trap removal just so you could guarantee that you could Special Summon a Deathless monster from your hand, Deck or Graveyard? And did you have to do for it? Oh yeah, absolutely nothing. So yeah, the card is exactly what its name suggests; unfair.[/quote] I got carried away with this card, I admit haha. [quote]Also, you have a wording issue. You don't say "discard 1 card from your Deck", you say "send 1 card from your Deck to the Graveyard".[/quote] Man, I got to improve my OCG. Thanks for point it out, I'll fix it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guy Raffaele Posted September 28, 2012 Report Share Posted September 28, 2012 It looks like most of these monsters rely[size=4] on[/size] Dark Grepher and Foolish Burial.[background=rgb(251, 253, 254)][font="tahoma, helvetica, arial, sans-serif"][color="#5a5a5a"]Deathless Destroyer is too much of an advantage if you send a "Deathless" monster from the deck to the graveyard you've already got a monster then you can negate an activation of a spell or trap and its pretty much no cost for it.Just a thought.[/color][/font][/background]It looks like most of these monsters rely[size=4] on[/size] Dark Grepher and Foolish Burial.[background=rgb(251, 253, 254)][font="tahoma, helvetica, arial, sans-serif"][color="#5a5a5a"]Deathless Destroyer is too much of an advantage if you send a "Deathless" monster from the deck to the graveyard you've already got a monster then you can negate an activation of a spell or trap and its pretty much no cost for it.Just a thought.[/color][/font][/background] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WickeRogs Posted September 28, 2012 Author Report Share Posted September 28, 2012 [b]Update.[/b] Hi guys, I changed some effects Deathless Destroyer now can only negate the activation of a Spell or Trap card that Target a monster in the graveyard and it cannot declare an attack in the turn it uses its effect. Deathless Giant Orc is removed from play at the end phase its Special Summon itself. The Frightened Corpse is no longer a continuous spell card and can only be activated during your main phase and if you control no monsters. Also, cannot synchro and xyz summon in the same turn you activate it. Unholy Ground became more powerful, covering all Zombie-type monster an the main spell card of this set. Unholy Refresh and Rise of the Damned changed dramatically. Please, comment Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sander Posted September 28, 2012 Report Share Posted September 28, 2012 [quote name='WickeRogs' timestamp='1348803668' post='6033635'] I won't change this card for now just because it only works for this set. [/quote] Ugh, this mentality. "I won't balance this card just because it makes my archetype live!", but the thing is, the archetype already has 3 ways to get the monsters in the Graveyard from the Deck. I already mentioned them so I'm not going to explain this again. [quote name='WickeRogs' timestamp='1348803668' post='6033635'] Didn't understand what you meant to say here, sorry :/ [/quote] You would clearly select a Deathless monster with The Frightened Corpse, which in turn will kick the selected monsters effect in and said monster will Special Summon itself from the Graveyard. Get it now? [quote name='WickeRogs' timestamp='1348803668' post='6033635'] I did Giant Orc with this purpose: A heavy beater that can be Special Summoned easily. C'mon, a Chainsaw Insect has 2400 ATK being a 4 star monster, but I'll do something about it. [/quote] Don't compare Chainsaw Insect which gives your opponent a free draw to a monster that can be Special Summoned with Foolish Burial / the plethora of cards that mill your deck. All in all, the set is still broken as it has 2 cards (Rise of the Damned / The Frightened Corpse), and those cards are only good for one thing: spam monsters for NO COST WHATSOEVER. Really, why did you think that was a good idea in the first place? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WickeRogs Posted September 28, 2012 Author Report Share Posted September 28, 2012 [quote name='Zanda Panda' timestamp='1348839759' post='6033791'] All in all, the set is still broken as it has 2 cards (Rise of the Damned / The Frightened Corpse) [/quote] Changed both cards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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