jason+sean Posted March 27, 2014 Report Share Posted March 27, 2014 [attachment=41050:Krate4.jpg] *All damage this card deals to your opponent is halved. If this card attacks, give control of this card to your opponent after damage calculation. If this card does not declare an attack, the controller of this card takes damage equal to its original Atk during the end phase. Cannot be used as a Fusion, Synchro, or Xyz Material for a Summon. While this card is face-up on the field, it cannot be Tributed. My first card. I wanted to make an extremly powerful level 4 monster but I knew its effect would have to balace it out. I think I did a good job. If people like it, or at least tolerate it, I might expand upon the betrayer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BANZAI!!!! Posted March 27, 2014 Report Share Posted March 27, 2014 card text should read: *All damage this card deals to your opponent is halved. If this card attacks, give control of this card to your opponent after damage calculation. If this card does not declare an attack, the controller of this card takes damage equal to its original Atk during the end phase. (someone correct me if my ocg is still wrong) art is meh at best. As for the card itself, while I wouldn't necessarily call it badly designed, its pretty bad. 2700 is nice to kill things with, but a lot of decks will have ways around the one attack it has before it changes control. even if they don;t and you manage to off something nice and big with it, (which is what im assuming this is meant to do) once it does change control, you've basically given your opponent half of whatever flavor of generic rank 4 xyz they decide to use it as material for, and they won't get burned by it by doing that either. plus, it being a dark warrior means it can be a mat for a few non-generics too (excalibur comes to mind, but i can't think of any others atm and im not even sure he qualifies). all in all, while not a badly designed card (the effect is certainly fair and not broken from my perspective), i wouldn't call it playable in the least. perhaps give it a clause that makes it unable to be used as a mat so that it has to either burn a player or keep swinging until someone/thing kills it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trebuchet MS Posted March 27, 2014 Report Share Posted March 27, 2014 Let's fine-tune the lore first. Halve all damage this card does inflicts to your opponent is halved. If At the end of the Damage Step where this card attacked: s and the attack is not negated, your opponent gains control of this card changes to your opponent after damage calculation. At the end of the Battle Phase: if this card is able to, and does but did not attack during the controller of this card's turn; You the controller of this card takes damage equal to its original ATK attack. Does the first effect also halve any effect damage this card would inflict, if any? The last effect has been particularly difficult to phrase in PSCT. My current version in the quote above has the unintended side effect of not taking damage if you don't enter the Battle Phase. Maybe if we make it a "must attack if able" effect which can be negated by taking damage... Anyway, I like how, in exchange for having ridiculous stats, you risk either taking severe damage by not attacking, or giving your opponent this card (and all its burdens) if you do attack with it. Skill Drain turns it into a simple no-tribute big beater (but then again, Skill Drain has Barbaros...), Remove Brainwashing negates the control switch effect, but much more hilariously, Vengeful Servant combines the switcharoo shenanigans with the sadistic decisions presented for stupid amounts of potential burn. Now, if only its new controller doesn't simply use it for Synchro/Xyz/Tribute/Fusion fodder... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jason+sean Posted March 27, 2014 Author Report Share Posted March 27, 2014 Is this better? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BANZAI!!!! Posted March 27, 2014 Report Share Posted March 27, 2014 non-mat clause should read: *this card cannot be used as fusion, synchro, or xyz material. gadjiltron brought up some good points that i didn't think of, like this guy being hella fun in skill drain decks. as it is now, it's not a staple card or anything that would be meta, but it looks like a fun, derpy card that i would throw in skill drain or something else random. i like it. I would advise giving the realistic cards guide a look-see, if only so that you can find the card art dumps that Aix (one of the mods here) posted links to. as well, might help you get better at card making if you read it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trebuchet MS Posted March 27, 2014 Report Share Posted March 27, 2014 Taking from the Duston clause, the last sentence should read: Cannot be used as a Fusion, Synchro, or Xyz Material for a Summon. While this card is face-up on the field, it cannot be Tributed. Which prevents the opponent (or you, for that matter) from doing anything to willingly remove this card from the field and dodge its sadistic choice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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