Creature Absorption

[AGATHODAIMON BANGTAIL COW]

[spoiler='H-how are you doing this?! You didn't even Shape me!']Target 1 monster on the field; its controller gains 3000 Life Points, and if they do, send that monster to the Graveyard, also you cannot Special Summon until the end of your turn.

 

EDIT 1: Nerfed the removal from banishment to sending to the Grave, and also added a "no SS" clause.[/spoiler]

 

Another toy that makes you glad that the age of Dragon Rulers is gone. Inspired by the silly "kill monster" spells such as Soul Taker and Smashing Ground, this card lets you take out monsters with a +0. To compensate your opponent for suddenly killing their monster, with control over what you're killing and banishing it instead of destroying (not to mention this is a quick-play), this card gives the controller of the monster 3k Life Points. It's designed to be versatile enough for you to be able to -2 yourself for a quick heal in response to something. In a currently unprecedented (I think) clause that only banishes the monster if your opponent gains Life Points, this card's use in Healburn Decks is lessened somewhat so that they can't get a kill off and a Gift Card to boot.

 

Given the potency of the card, I have a feeling that a 3k heal for your opponent isn't enough to make up for the quick-play banishment, even though it is enough to completely nullify pretty much any single direct attack (like one that would not have been made if the monster wasn't banished, for example). I'd raise the healing, but I really shouldn't do that because Nurse Reficule and Bad Reaction to Simoichi exist, and also there's a limit on how much you should be able to heal yourself with a card that coincidentally lets you dodge things like BTS. I could weaken the form of removal to sending to the Grave, though I don't think I'd want to nerf it completely down to destroying since so many cards already do this, and so many cards also ignore it/float off of it. And destruction kinda removes flavor points.

[-Griffin]

You are correct that it does not make up for the Quick-Play Banishment. Quick-Play Target-Any-Monster +0 Banishment is absurdly good. This breaks combos and kills bosses so easily that it will single handedly win games all the time and be fast-tracked to the banlist. A prime example of Life Points above 1 not being a big deal very often.

[AGATHODAIMON BANGTAIL COW]

You are correct that it does not make up for the Quick-Play Banishment. Quick-Play Target-Any-Monster +0 Banishment is absurdly good. This breaks combos and kills bosses so easily that it will single handedly win games all the time and be fast-tracked to the banlist. A prime example of Life Points above 1 not being a big deal very often.

Well, Life Points is somewhat a bigger deal since Soul Charge exists, but anyways I decided it should send to the Grave, then tossed on a no-SS clause that won't be ignored if it activates on your opponent's turn.