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Doomsday Deck? The Unbeatable Army


pumpkin_972005

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The characters:

Yami Yugi & Friends

Man in Cloak

Crew & Audience of Tournament

 

The Story:

 

Announcer:Hello everyone, and welcome to the annual World Championships!!!

 

Crowd: YAAAAAAAAAA!!!

 

Announcer: The First Round will now commence: Seto Kaiba Vs. The Sorceror!!!

 

Seto Kaiba: This auta be easy. I mean what kind of a nickname is, "The Sorceror"?

 

Judge: Gentlemen, you may now start! Sorceror, you may go first.

 

Sorceror and Kaiba start with 8000 LP.

 

Sorceror: I'll go easy on you Kaiba... I'll just set a card.

 

Kaiba: Fine... I'll go hard on you! Draw! (smirks) Ladies and gentlemen, this is the first time I'm doing this on my first move... I activate polymerization! Fusing the five dragon cards in my hand to summon THE FIVE-HEADED DRAGON!!!

 

Sorceror: Activating face-down card: Final Doom. As long as it is in my graveyard, if another card goes in my graveyard, I lose! But, in addition, we both draw one card.

 

Kaiba: Amazing. But before I draw, go my dragon! attack his lifepoints directly!!! (Sorceror: 3000). Now I draw, and amazingly the card I drew is Defusion! I'm going to use it to defuse my dragon into the cards I used to summon them: 3 Blue-Eyes White Dragons, and two Chaos Dragons!!! Now, I use one of my Caos dragon's effects to destroy all of my monsters and deal 300 points of damage to you for each one!!! (Sorceror: 1500)

 

Sorceror: My move. Draw!!! I activate the card Final Bribe, so by removing a card from my hand from play, I can negate the effect of Final doom for a turn! Now I summon Dark Blue-Eyes White Dragon!

 

Kaiba:What the???

 

Sorceror: It's just like your monster except it has an effect and can only be summoned when Your Blue-Eyes is in the grave! Now, I'm also going to activate a card called Megamorph! This doubles my dragon's ATK points! Now go, MY dragon, attack Seto Directly! (Seto: 2000)

 

Seto: You'll pay for that you little rat!!!

 

???: Hey! That rhymes!!!

 

Seto: WHEELER!!!

 

Joey: Yep! Me and my pals are here to watch the match!!!

 

Steo: (sigh) Now it's my move! DRAW!!! I activ Card of Sanctity! Now we both draw until we have six cards! Now, I'm going to activate the spell card caled FINAL FUSION!!! Thius allows me to discard my hand to summon any fusion card from my fusion deck as long as I remove from play the fusion materials from my graveyard!!!

Ladies and gents, THE BLUE-EYES ULTIMATE DRAGON!!!

 

Sorceror: Kaiba, (laughs loudly) you fool!!! (LAUGHS VERY LOUDLY)!

 

(To be continued)

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De-Fusion is a Quick-Play Spell, so Kaiba could have just used it on his F.G.D. during the Battle Phase and attacked with the five monsters summoned by it, thus winning the duel instantly. Since he didn't do so, this entire story is based around the premise that one of the world's best and richest duelists has no clue how to play, making it automatically fail due to ridiculous character derailment and an idiot plot.

 

Oh, and let's not forget that Final Bribe went to the graveyard after use, and its effect wore off at the end of Sorcerer's turn, which means that Kaiba should have won at the start of his next turn, since Final Doom would become active again.

 

So this Sorcerer guy should have lost twice already, but didn't - once due to Kaiba carrying an idiot ball, and once due to disregard of the established rules. Can this get any more contrived?

 

Oh, and let's not forget that Kaiba would definitely not give up five dragons from the field, including his 3 Blue-Eyes white Dragons, in order to inflict a measly 1500 damage that wouldn't even win him the game and which would leave him completely open to a direct attack and with no cards in his hand or field. So that's another piece of character derailment, and another idiot ball handed to Kaiba.

 

And even aside from all of this, the story is hideously generic - a mysterious guy with a deck of doom appears and fights an established character without any real setup other than LOLITSATOURNAMENT.

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PART 2:

 

Sorceror: Go ahead, attack it! I don't care!

 

Kaiba: You're bluffing... AND I'LL PROVE IT! BLUE-EYES ULTIMATE DRAGON, ATTACK HIM WITH TRIPLE WHITE LIGHTNING!!!

 

A massive burst of colour comes out of the dragon's mouth, aiming directly at The Sorceror, but then, just then, something strange happens... The Sorceror's Dragon Begins to [underline]consume[/underline] the Dragon's attack!!!

 

The Sorceror: You see, Seto, my Dragon's special effect will save me!!! as long as Final Doom is in my grave, it drains your attack and loses ATK and DEF points equal to your monster's ATK. (Dark Blue-Eyes White Dragon: ATK=1000, DEF=0)

 

Kaiba: Very nice.

 

Sorceror: My move, DRAW! Now I activate my Final Bribe, and also the spell card Graceful Gain. The effect is simple: I will give you any amount of cards from my hand, and gain 1000 LP for each card! So here are 2 cards. (Sorceror:3500) Next, I activate Power Surge. By forcing you to discard all the cards in your hand, I draw a card, and your BEUD gains 300 ATK for each. (BEUD:ATK=5100) But there's more; I summon my Dark Summoned Skull and Evil Dark Magician!

 

Joey:What? Kaiba doesn't have Summoned Skull or Dark Magician???

 

Yugi: But the Sorcerer probablay gave it to him!!!

 

Sorcerer: Now I activate Final Dark Fusion, which is only able to be activate when Final Doom is in my grave. It is just like Polymerization. I fuse the monsters on my side of the field to summon Evil Thunder Dragon Magician!!!(ATK:0, DEF:0) It has the ultimate special ability!!! It can take one monster in your graveyard and one spell card in mine and add their effects and ATK to itself!!!

 

Kaiba: WHAT???

 

Sorcerer: GO! DRAIN THE POWER OF MEGAMORPH AND CHAOS DRAGON!!! THEN FINISH KAIBA OFF!!!

 

A burst of electricity hit the duelists' duel disk as the magician waved his staff around. (Evil Thunder Dragon Magician: ATK:6000) then a huge blast of fire and smoke destroyed BEUD. (Kaiba: 1100). Now, I activate pot of greed, then the spell card Power Creation, alllowing me to bring out one monster that I used for Evil Thunder Dragon Magician!!! (ETDM: ATK:0, DEF:0). Now I'll use Chaos Dragon's effect combined with the effect of Return from the grave, allowing me to bring back all the monsters in your graveyard on the field and Chaos Dragon will destroy each one!!! (Kaiba: 0)

 

Kaiba: How is this possible???

 

Continued to round Two

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More mistakes.

 

First of all, a card under the control of the opponent of its creator - whether on the field by the effect of something like Creature Swap, in the hand by the effect of something like Exchange, or in the deck by the effect of something like Parasite Paracide - will, when sent to the graveyard, return to the graveyard of its owner, not the graveyard of the opponent. Thus, Dark Magician and Summoned Skull would be in Sorcerer's own graveyard, not Kaiba's, so by the established rules of these dark counterpart monsters, Sorcerer should not have been able to summon them.

 

There's no real reason for Kaiba to run something like Final Fusion when he could just use Dragon's Mirror - a card which, in his Dragon-based deck, would have an identical effect but would lack the cost of discarding the five-card hand he just drew?

 

Power Surge, incidentally, is a ridiculously overpowered card that would be put in every deck from the moment it was released until the moment it was banned. Compare it to Delinquent Duo - a card that only discards two cards, doesn't let you draw, and has a Life Point cost.

 

You've screwed up one again with Evil Thunder Dragon Magician - or, more specifically, with the Megamorph effect that it was using. Megamorph's effect doubles your monster's ATK if you have fewer Life Points than if your opponent does, but while your opponent is winning, your monster's ATK is cut in half. At that point in the duel, Sorcerer had 3500 Life Points, but Kaiba only had 2000; therefore, Evil Thunder Dragon Magician's ATK would have been sliced in half down to 1500, not doubled up to 6000, so it would be unable to defeat Blue-Eyes Ultimate Dragon.

 

I had thought that Chaos Dragon was an original card you created, but it now seems like it's supposed to be Chaos Emperor Dragon - Envoy of the End, a card used by Kaiba during the KC Grand Prix arc. If it is supposed to be that card, then you're getting its effect completely and utterly wrong.

 

ah' date=' to see Kaiba humiliated by somone other than Yugi, and this time it appears to be fairly done (unlike Noah and Dartz who cheated), I never thought I'd see the day

[/quote']

 

Is that so? Let's recap:

 

1) Kaiba carries an Idiot Ball by not simply winning with De-Fusion when he had the chance.

 

2) Kaiba carries an Idiot Ball by giving up all five cards he controls in order to inflict minor burn damage, leaving him with absolutely nothing at the end of his first turn.

 

3) Kaiba suffers from Character Derailment by sacrificing his three precious Blue-Eyes White Dragons for practically no reason.

 

4) Sorcerer breaks the established rules by not losing due to Final Doom's effect during Turn 4.

 

5) Kaiba carries an Idiot Ball by using Final Fusion in his deck instead of Dragon's Mirror.

 

6) Kaiba carries an Idiot Ball by activating Final Fusion while he still has a completely full hand instead of playing some of the cards from it first, essentially giving up five cards for no logical reason.

 

7) Kaiba, along with everyone else in the universe, carries an Idiot Ball by not including Power Surge in their deck.

 

8) Sorcerer breaks the established rules by Special Summoning Evil Dark Magician when his opponent's graveyard did not contain Dark Magician.

 

9) Sorcerer breaks the established rules by Special Summoning Dark Summoned Skull when his opponent's graveyard did not contain Summoned Skull.

 

10) Sorcerer breaks the established rules by having his monster's ATK double by the effect of Megamorph even though his own Life Points exceeded those of his opponent.

 

11) Assuming that Chaos Dragon is indeed supposed to be Chaos Emperor Dragon - Envoy of the End, both duelists break the established rules by pretending that its effect is essentially a weakened version of that of Cannon Soldier.

 

For those who don't know, a character "carries an Idiot Ball" when they do something unbelievably stupid for the purpose of advancing the author's plot (such as Kaiba deciding not to win with a play that he has used countless times in the past), and suffers from "Character Derailment" when they act completely against their established character for no apparent reason other than because the author wanted them to (such as Kaiba randomly sacrificing the BEWD's to which he is supposed to have a strong attachment).

 

And all of this took place during a single five-turn duel in the first chapter.

 

Fail.

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hey' date=' Kaiba has done more than enough of those stupid moves in the anime already, so I consider that natural

[/quote']

 

Kaiba occasionally carries an Idiot Ball in the anime, but so does every other character. The writers are bad that way. But Kaiba's actual character stopped being relevant the moment he gave up his BEWDs for no reason.

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well that's obvious. Since when has Kaiba dueled without EVER using at least one of his BEWD?

 

The problem isn't that he used them; the problem is that he gave them up for no reason. Read my posts better.

 

In the original, the only times I can think of where Kaiba voluntarily gave up a BEWD were the times he fused it into BEUD, making it even more awesome, the time he had it discarded from his hand so he could immediately use Monster Reborn on it, thus allowing it to actually be used, and the time he sacrificed ia weakened BEWD along with another monster to Tribute Summon a full-strength BEWD, thus somehow proving how awesome BEWD is. He certainly never casually tossed all his Blue-Eyes White Dragons off the field and into the graveyard for a minor burn effect like that - he loves his dragons too much for that.

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De-Fusion is a Quick-Play Spell' date=' so Kaiba could have just used it on his F.G.D. during the Battle Phase and attacked with the five monsters summoned by it, thus winning the duel instantly. Since he didn't do so, this entire story is based around the premise that one of the world's best and richest duelists has no clue how to play, making it automatically fail due to ridiculous character derailment and an idiot plot.

 

Oh, and let's not forget that Final Bribe went to the graveyard after use, and its effect wore off at the end of Sorcerer's turn, which means that Kaiba should have won at the start of his next turn, since Final Doom would become active again.

 

So this Sorcerer guy should have lost twice already, but didn't - once due to Kaiba carrying an idiot ball, and once due to disregard of the established rules. Can this get any more contrived?

 

Oh, and let's not forget that Kaiba would definitely not give up five dragons from the field, including his 3 Blue-Eyes white Dragons, in order to inflict a measly 1500 damage that wouldn't even win him the game and which would leave him completely open to a direct attack and with no cards in his hand or field. So that's another piece of character derailment, and another idiot ball handed to Kaiba.

 

And even aside from all of this, the story is hideously generic - a mysterious guy with a deck of doom appears and fights an established character without any real setup other than LOLITSATOURNAMENT.

[/quote']

 

More mistakes.

 

First of all' date=' a card under the control of the opponent of its creator - whether on the field by the effect of something like Creature Swap, in the hand by the effect of something like Exchange, or in the deck by the effect of something like Parasite Paracide - will, when sent to the graveyard, return to the graveyard of its owner, [i']not[/i] the graveyard of the opponent. Thus, Dark Magician and Summoned Skull would be in Sorcerer's own graveyard, not Kaiba's, so by the established rules of these dark counterpart monsters, Sorcerer should not have been able to summon them.

 

There's no real reason for Kaiba to run something like Final Fusion when he could just use Dragon's Mirror - a card which, in his Dragon-based deck, would have an identical effect but would lack the cost of discarding the five-card hand he just drew?

 

Power Surge, incidentally, is a ridiculously overpowered card that would be put in every deck from the moment it was released until the moment it was banned. Compare it to Delinquent Duo - a card that only discards two cards, doesn't let you draw, and has a Life Point cost.

 

You've screwed up one again with Evil Thunder Dragon Magician - or, more specifically, with the Megamorph effect that it was using. Megamorph's effect doubles your monster's ATK if you have fewer Life Points than if your opponent does, but while your opponent is winning, your monster's ATK is cut in half. At that point in the duel, Sorcerer had 3500 Life Points, but Kaiba only had 2000; therefore, Evil Thunder Dragon Magician's ATK would have been sliced in half down to 1500, not doubled up to 6000, so it would be unable to defeat Blue-Eyes Ultimate Dragon.

 

I had thought that Chaos Dragon was an original card you created, but it now seems like it's supposed to be Chaos Emperor Dragon - Envoy of the End, a card used by Kaiba during the KC Grand Prix arc. If it is supposed to be that card, then you're getting its effect completely and utterly wrong.

 

ah' date=' to see Kaiba humiliated by somone other than Yugi, and this time it appears to be fairly done (unlike Noah and Dartz who cheated), I never thought I'd see the day

[/quote']

 

Is that so? Let's recap:

 

1) Kaiba carries an Idiot Ball by not simply winning with De-Fusion when he had the chance.

 

2) Kaiba carries an Idiot Ball by giving up all five cards he controls in order to inflict minor burn damage, leaving him with absolutely nothing at the end of his first turn.

 

3) Kaiba suffers from Character Derailment by sacrificing his three precious Blue-Eyes White Dragons for practically no reason.

 

4) Sorcerer breaks the established rules by not losing due to Final Doom's effect during Turn 4.

 

5) Kaiba carries an Idiot Ball by using Final Fusion in his deck instead of Dragon's Mirror.

 

6) Kaiba carries an Idiot Ball by activating Final Fusion while he still has a completely full hand instead of playing some of the cards from it first, essentially giving up five cards for no logical reason.

 

7) Kaiba, along with everyone else in the universe, carries an Idiot Ball by not including Power Surge in their deck.

 

8) Sorcerer breaks the established rules by Special Summoning Evil Dark Magician when his opponent's graveyard did not contain Dark Magician.

 

9) Sorcerer breaks the established rules by Special Summoning Dark Summoned Skull when his opponent's graveyard did not contain Summoned Skull.

 

10) Sorcerer breaks the established rules by having his monster's ATK double by the effect of Megamorph even though his own Life Points exceeded those of his opponent.

 

11) Assuming that Chaos Dragon is indeed supposed to be Chaos Emperor Dragon - Envoy of the End, both duelists break the established rules by pretending that its effect is essentially a weakened version of that of Cannon Soldier.

 

For those who don't know, a character "carries an Idiot Ball" when they do something unbelievably stupid for the purpose of advancing the author's plot (such as Kaiba deciding not to win with a play that he has used countless times in the past), and suffers from "Character Derailment" when they act completely against their established character for no apparent reason other than because the author wanted them to (such as Kaiba randomly sacrificing the BEWD's to which he is supposed to have a strong attachment).

 

And all of this took place during a single five-turn duel in the first chapter.

 

Fail.

 

If there's one thing I do know, Kaiba does try to make the smartest move he can.

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that's true. He'd never tribute one of this Blue Eyes for something like do a mere 500 points of damage. In fact I doubt he'd do it even if that would end the duel in his victory

 

He might do it if it would be sufficient for him to claim victory' date=' since another aspect of his established character is that he's entirely ruthless.

 

If there's one thing I do know, Kaiba does try to make the smartest move he can.

 

To be fair, he is handed an Idiot Ball by the real writers on occasion - if I remember correctly, he could have won his duel with Noah easily with Ring of Destruction if he had blown up the right monster, but didn't because he blew up the wrong monster instead - but considering that we're also told that he is a brilliant duelist whose "flaw" is that he is ruthlessly efficient, this is more a case of the writers being lazy than it is of such amateur mistakes being a legitimate aspect of his character, and thus would be an improvement upon the show that a half-decent fanfic author could easily make. (And besides, Noah's Arc was filler anyhow.)

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even so' date=' I don't see him tributing his blue eyes for that smart move if it's only a small burn

[/quote']

 

Indeed - that was entirely out of character.

 

There was one instance in the anime where he effectively sacrificed his Blue-Eyes, but that was for a good reason (he did it to stop Yugi from being instantly killed), and the way he did it - taunting Lumis and Umbra about how they weren't going to attack him because they were afraid of his BEWD's awesomeness - was constructed to make BEWD sound even more awesome than it really was.

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the only time he probably shouldn't is the very first duel against Lumis and Umbra' date=' where he sacrificed his 3 blue eyes for Obelisk. Personally I felt that was abnormal for him

[/quote']

 

Just adding on: When Kaiba got Obelisk, he didn't tout it as the most wonderful thing beyond Blue Eyes. And changing his fave from BEWD to Obelisk would mean it wasn't his childhood fave.

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the only time he probably shouldn't is the very first duel against Lumis and Umbra' date=' where he sacrificed his 3 blue eyes for Obelisk. Personally I felt that was abnormal for him

[/quote']

 

At that point, though, he had the card game equivalent of being drunk with power - he was fascinated by Obelisk's godness. Look at what cards Kaiba uses to finish his duels (or has out on the field when he loses), and you'll see:

 

Kaiba v Yugi - Kaiba loses with 3 BEWD on the field.

Fake Kaiba v Yugi - Fake Kaiba loses with BEWD on the field.

Kaiba v Yugi - Kaiba wins with BEUD.

Kaiba v Pegasus - Kaiba loses with... Saggi the Dark Clown. But Crush Card had ensured that BEWD couldn't be summoned.

 

Suddenly, Kaiba gets Obelisk, and becomes obsessed with its power.

 

Kaiba v Duel Computer - Kaiba wins with Obelisk.

Kaiba v Random Guy - Kaiba wins with Obelisk.

Kaiba v Lumis and Umbra - Kaiba wins with Obelisk... using 3 BEWD as tributes.

Kaiba v Lumis and Umbra - Kaiba wins with Obelisk.

 

This reverses when the finals arrive and Kaiab rediscovers his connection to BEWD or something silly like that:

 

Kaiba v Ishizu - Kaiba wins with BEWD...which was Tribute Summoned with Obelisk as a tribute.

Kaiba v Lector - Kaiba wins with BEWD.

Kaiba v Noah - Kaiba loses with BEWD.

Kaiba v Gozaburo - Kaiba wins with BEWD.

Kaiba v Yugi - Kaiba loses with 3 BEWD.

Kaiba v Joey - Kaiba wins with BEWD.

 

In each case, Kaiba's last card is the card with which he currently has the strongest connection - except Saggi, of course, who doesn't count because of Crush Card's shenanigans. Kaiba snaps back to normal when he tributes Obelisk for BEWD against Ishizu.

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Kaiba snapped back against Ishizu's duel because he saw something he didn't believe in.

 

Even Marik was confused as to why he sacrificed a god.

 

And you left out the duels against Alister in WTD' date=' where he used the Fang of Critius, to which he also didn't believe, and I'm unsure how strong a connection with

[/quote']

 

I was going to stop there, but if you want to go into Season 4:

 

Kaiba v Alister - Kaiba ties with Doom Virus Dragon, but this was mainly a device for introducing the Fang of Critias. Also, guess what card he used to defeat Alister's Toon strategy, after which he revealed his true identity and completely switched decks? It was BEWD.

Kaiba v Alister - Kaiba wins with Blue-Eyes Tyrant Dragon, a Fusion created from BEWD

Kaiba and Yugi v Dartz - Kaiba loses with Mirror Force Dragon, having summoned BEUD (and with Yugi's help DMK) at the start of the duel before Dartz even took a turn.

 

Eh, he got a bit hijacked by the arc McGuffin, but it's filler anyhow.

 

Kaiba v Siegfried - Kaiba wins with all three Blue-Eyes White Dragons (plus Luster Dragon and Chaos Emperor Dragon - Envoy of the End)

Kaiba v Bakura - No final results, but this whole duel was about BEWD. On his second turn, Kaiba Special Summons BEWD. It gets weakened by the Diabounds, so on his next turn, Kaiba tributes the weakened BEWD and another monster to summon another BEWD. And when that gets destroyed? Monster Reborn Special Summons BEWD again. It's at that point that Bakura leaves, so Kaiba's last card is indeed BEWD.

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*shrugs* Yeah well I guess the writers felt because Joey didn't get a God card in BC' date=' he should have something special in season 4

[/quote']

 

True, but the entire point of Joey is that he's a normal person - he's not an expert duelist, he doesn't have a Millennium Item, he doesn't have a God Card, he doesn't have an ancient Egyptian counterpart, he's not rich, he has no alternate personality, and his deck doesn't contain any amazingly powerful monsters like Dark Magician and BEWD - the closest things he has to those are Jinzo and REBD, neither of which is presented as being nearly as powerful as other duelists' key cards and both of which he actually had to win by defeating their original owners.

 

Letting him get an ancient artifact McGuffin deus ex machina like that goes completely against the purpose of Joey.

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