JesusofChaos™ Posted March 4, 2009 Report Share Posted March 4, 2009 Beer and Ice Cream DietJustification for beer and Ice cream! But stay away from the pizza! As we all know, it takes 1 calorie to heat 1 gram of water 1 degree centigrade. Translated into meaningful terms, this means that if you eat a very cold dessert (generally consisting of water in large part), the natural processes which raise the consumed dessert to body temperature during the digestive cycle literally sucks the calories out of the only available source, your body fat. For example, a dessert served and eaten at near 0 degrees C (32.2 deg. F) will in a short time be raised to the normal body temperature of 37 degrees C (98.6 deg. F). For each gram of dessert eaten, that process takes approximately 37 calories as stated above. The average desser tportion is 6 oz, or 168 grams. Therefore, by operation of thermodynamiclaw, 6,216 calories (1 cal./gm/deg. x 37 deg. x 168 gms) are extracted from body fat as the dessert's temperature is normalized. Allowing for the 1,200 latent calories in the dessert, the net calorie loss is approximately 5,000 calories. Obviously, the more cold dessert you eat,the better off you are and the faster you will lose weight, if that is your goal. This process works equally well when drinking very cold beer in frosted glasses. Each ounce of beer contains 16 latent calories, but extracts 1,036 calories (6,216 cal. per 6 oz. portion) in the temperature normalizing process. Thus the net calorie loss per ounce of beer is 1,020 calories. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to calculate that 12,240 calories (12 oz. x 1,020 cal./oz.) are extracted from the body in the process of drinking a can of beer. Frozen desserts, e.g., ice cream, are even more beneficial, since it takes 83 cal./gm to melt them (i.e., raise them to 0 deg. C) and an additional 37 cal./gm to further raise them to body temperature. The results here are really remarkable, and it beats running hands down. Unfortunately, for those who eat pizza as an excuse to drink beer, pizza (loaded with latent calories and served above body temperature) induces an opposite effect. But, thankfully, as the astute reader should have already reasoned, the obvious solution is to drink a lot of beer with pizza and follow up immediately with large bowls of ice cream. We could all be thin if we were to adhere religiously to a pizza, beer, and ice cream diet. Happy eating! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bloodrun Posted March 4, 2009 Report Share Posted March 4, 2009 You mean: "Now I know why I have such a good shape" ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JesusofChaos™ Posted March 4, 2009 Author Report Share Posted March 4, 2009 You mean: "Now I know why I have such a good shape" ? Trust you to comment before i finish edit Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OMGAKITTY Posted March 4, 2009 Report Share Posted March 4, 2009 tl;dr.copypasta. Meh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
「tea.leaf」 Posted March 4, 2009 Report Share Posted March 4, 2009 Oh really? Eating ice cubes will turn me into a twig? How fast? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larxene Posted March 4, 2009 Report Share Posted March 4, 2009 Almost everything I eat is cold. =o No wonder I stay thin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Revan Posted March 4, 2009 Report Share Posted March 4, 2009 O.oThat's why I'm the skinniest person at school.That ice cream does help!And people said ice cream for breakfast, lunch and dinner was bad!Those bastards owe me 10 bucks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bloodrun Posted March 4, 2009 Report Share Posted March 4, 2009 You mean: "Now I know why I have such a good shape" ? Trust you to comment before i finish edit Sorry, I don't have time to wait and refresh your profile, for it to tell me:"Editing Post". So I took the next best route, and posted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Felix Posted March 4, 2009 Report Share Posted March 4, 2009 I require Ice Cream, forget the stuff that keeps me healthy, ICE CREAM FTW!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tekken Ham Posted March 4, 2009 Report Share Posted March 4, 2009 Forget ice cream and beer, I just starve myself. It works just as fine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jesus Posted March 4, 2009 Report Share Posted March 4, 2009 Forget ice cream and beer' date=' I just starve myself. It works just as fine.[/quote'] This. Seriously though, incredible article. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luna Lovegood Posted March 4, 2009 Report Share Posted March 4, 2009 Almost everything I eat is cold. =o No wonder I stay thin. you look fat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Willieh Posted March 4, 2009 Report Share Posted March 4, 2009 No. I think I'll stick to my diet of very greasy foods and lots of energy drinks and sodas. And don't forget the occasional thirty or forty Twinkies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Felix Posted March 4, 2009 Report Share Posted March 4, 2009 Go Willieh!!! I'm giving the owner of this thread a rep for EPIC post. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Crimson King Posted March 5, 2009 Report Share Posted March 5, 2009 I'm just gonna start chugging ice cubes because I feel like going anarexic so I can skip school. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jesus Posted March 5, 2009 Report Share Posted March 5, 2009 Actually, now that I think about it, This would only work if you did the running along with all of that ice cream. If you did nothing about the excess calories and fat in the ice cream you would be gaining more weight than losing. Think about it. If you just eat Ice cream, you'd be saying to the world 'I'm fat!!!' You have a high metabolism. That's the easy way to explain it. It says the same about those who do all the exercising. Most people I know have a high metabolism and they're lazy as anything and they stay as thin as can be. I'm sorry, I must say that you have high metabolism. =/. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Father Wolf Posted March 5, 2009 Report Share Posted March 5, 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tekken Ham Posted March 5, 2009 Report Share Posted March 5, 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cyber Altair Posted March 5, 2009 Report Share Posted March 5, 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yasu Posted March 7, 2009 Report Share Posted March 7, 2009 Advice dog is right, as always. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
「tea.leaf」 Posted March 8, 2009 Report Share Posted March 8, 2009 Explain how the energy conversion process functions in transforming fat into heat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huntar! Posted March 8, 2009 Report Share Posted March 8, 2009 this sounds good. I should stop eating hot food and eat shaved ice forever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dweller of Parables Posted March 8, 2009 Report Share Posted March 8, 2009 this sounds good. I should stop eating hot food and eat shaved ice forever. Epic is Epic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jesus Posted March 8, 2009 Report Share Posted March 8, 2009 *Still waits for a counter arguement against disproving my theory about this theroy* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JesusofChaos™ Posted March 8, 2009 Author Report Share Posted March 8, 2009 Actually' date=' now that I think about it, This would only work if you did the running along with all of that ice cream. If you did nothing about the excess calories and fat in the ice cream you would be gaining more weight than losing. Think about it. If you just eat Ice cream, you'd be saying to the world 'I'm fat!!!' You have a high metabolism. That's the easy way to explain it. It says the same about those who do all the exercising. Most people I know have a high metabolism and they're lazy as anything and they stay as thin as can be. I'm sorry, I must say that you have high metabolism. =/.[/quote']Obviously you cant read the article so I selected the bit to counter your argument This process works equally well when drinking very cold beer in frosted glasses. Each ounce of beer contains 16 latent calories, but extracts 1,036 calories (6,216 cal. per 6 oz. portion) in the temperature normalizing process. Thus the net calorie loss per ounce of beer is 1,020 calories. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to calculate that 12,240 calories (12 oz. x 1,020 cal./oz.) are extracted from the body in the process of drinking a can of beer. Frozen desserts, e.g., ice cream, are even more beneficial, since it takes 83 cal./gm to melt them (i.e., raise them to 0 deg. C) and an additional 37 cal./gm to further raise them to body temperature. The results here are really remarkable, and it beats running hands down. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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