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Yu-Gi-Oh! Rise of Dragune (Chapter 1)


ShootingTheMoon

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Duel Machine: I PLAY POT OF GREED WHICH LETS ME DRAW 2 CARDS. I ACTIVATE FOOLISH BURIAL AND I CHOOSE TO DISCARD "WULF, LIGHTSWORN BEAST"(ATK/2100) DUE TO HIS EFFECT HE IS SUMMONED TO MY FIELD.I SUMMON HIM IN ATTACK MODE. I END MY TURN.

Spark:Okay my turn! I activate "Polymerazation" to fuse "Mech Sparky" "Bubble Sparky" and "Fire Sparky" to summon "Blue Mechaflame Sparky" in attack mode. Now due to his effect i draw 2 cards. Now I summon "Tempest Sparky" in ATK mode now I activate his effect I send the top three cards on the top of my deck todestroy 3 cards on your field! I end my turn.

Duel Machine: I SUMMON A MONSTER IN FACE-DOWN DEFENSE POSITION. I ACTIVATE A SPELL CARD "MONSTER REBORN". I SPECIAL SUMMON "WULF, LIGHTSWORN BEAST" BACK TO MY FIELD. I ATTACK "TEMPEST SPARKY"


SPARK 3300 COMPUTER 4000

Duel Computer: I END MY TURN

Spark: My turn. DRAW! I summon "Chochu" in Def Mode (DEF1500) Now I tune my Blue Mechalame Sparky with my chochu to Synchro Summon "Wonder Sparky" in ATK 2300. I attack your WULF!

LP Computer 3800 Spark 3300

Duel Computer: I DRAW-

Spark:I play Sparks of Greed I discard my entire hand to draw a new hand (5 cards).

Duel Computer: I ACTIVATE FOOLISH BURIAL AND DISCARD WULF LIGHTSWORN BEAST. NOW HE IS SPECIAL SUMMONED TO THE FIELD. NOW I TRIBUTE HIM TO SUMMON GRAGONITH, LIGHTSWORN DRAGON

(ATK 2000---> 2300).

Spark: I activate Bottomless Trap Hole. Now its removed from the game.

Duel Computer: I END MY TURN.

Spark: I draw. I play Calling all Elements so I can summon every card fwith "Sparky" in its name from my graveyard. So Blue Mechaflame, Fire, Bubble, and Mecha in my grave.

(Blue Mechaflame)ATK1200, (Fire) Atk1200, (Bubble) ATK800 (Mecha) ATK 1400 = 4600

Spark 3300 Duel Computer 0

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Okay, I got a request to review this, so get ready for the Christmas epoisode of WEATHER REPORT. Full of holiday cheer.

Duel Machine: I PLAY POT OF GREED WHICH LETS ME DRAW 2 CARDS. I ACTIVATE FOOLISH BURIAL AND I CHOOSE TO DISCARD "WULF' date=' LIGHTSWORN BEAST"(ATK/2100) DUE TO HIS EFFECT HE IS SUMMONED TO MY FIELD.I SUMMON HIM IN ATTACK MODE. I END MY TURN.

This is... STUPIIIIIIID!! WHERE'S THE CHAPTER TITLE?! WHERE'RE THE PEOPLE?! WHY IS THIS MACHINE IN OUR FACES?! WHY IS THIS A SCRIPT?! WHY DOES THIS MAKE NO SENSE?! Hm... I suppose this plot will soon surface...

Spark:Okay my turn! I activate "Polymerazation" to fuse "Mech Sparky" "Bubble Sparky" and "Fire Sparky" to summon "Blue Mechaflame Sparky" in attack mode. Now due to his effect i draw 2 cards. Now I summon "Tempest Sparky" in ATK mode now I activate his effect I send the top three cards on the top of my deck todestroy 3 cards on your field! I end my turn.

Hm. So the plot is that inside of Kaibaland, there's an evil duel machine run amok, dueling people that dare to come near it! A lone electrical spark tries to save the land from... being dueled... and challenges the computer with his rip-off cards!! Seriously, I see E-Heros written ALL OVER THESE guys. A bunch of monsters with a huge list of fusions. Yeah, THAT'S COOL, RIGHT?! NO!! Your ideas are dumber than the plot I made up for you!! And what, 'Blue Mechaflame Sparky'?! It's a blue, robotic spark of electricity on fire. HOW DOES THAT WORK?! What are the stats? Why does it have such a basic ability? Why is Tempest Sparky so much better than most cards we have today? Why didn't he just attack? Why did he discard three cards if there was only one card on the opponent's field? Why is this such a retarded story--NO. Wait, this is the MIDDLE of a random story. THAT'S why all of the important details have been left out! Although your style STILL sucks and I DESPISE script format, that fact makes the story a whole lot better.

Duel Machine: I SUMMON A MONSTER IN FACE-DOWN DEFENSE POSITION. I ACTIVATE A SPELL CARD "MONSTER REBORN". I SPECIAL SUMMON "WULF, LIGHTSWORN BEAST" BACK TO MY FIELD. I ATTACK "TEMPEST SPARKY"


SPARK 3300 COMPUTER 4000

How does he do so much damage? Tempest Sparky could KILL that guy, since his ATK is... uh... WHY DID YOU ONLY PROVIDE STATS FOR THE ONLY TCG CARD PLAYED SO FAR?!?! You're such a stupid writer that your story's making ME stupid. Any why are you such a GRAMMAR HATER? You never use periods or anything, so that gives you +8 Idiot Points. Now you have 69 Idiot Points. When you hit 100, you lose.

Duel Computer: I END MY TURN

Spark: My turn. DRAW! I summon "Chochu" in Def Mode (DEF1500) Now I tune my Blue Mechalame Sparky with my chochu to Synchro Summon "Wonder Sparky" in ATK 2300. I attack your WULF!

LP Computer 3800 Spark 3300

What does this crappy random tuner of blank level look like, anyways? What stats does that disgustingly named Wonder Sparky have? What does it look like and what does it do? Is it supposed to give you 12 more Idiot Points? I think so.

TOTAL SCORE: 81 IDIOT POINTS

Duel Computer: I DRAW-

Spark:I play Sparks of Greed I discard my entire hand to draw a new hand (5 cards).

Okay, that's random. You never said you set that card, Mr. Electrical Spark.

TOTAL SCORE: 84 IDIOT POINTS

Duel Computer: I ACTIVATE FOOLISH BURIAL AND DISCARD WULF LIGHTSWORN BEAST. NOW HE IS SPECIAL SUMMONED TO THE FIELD. NOW I TRIBUTE HIM TO SUMMON GRAGONITH, LIGHTSWORN DRAGON

(ATK 2000---> 2300).

You don't even know how to RUN a Lightsworn deck, at all. You use the same strategies over and over again and nothing (really) changes?

TOTAL SCORE: 86 IDIOT POINTS

Spark: I activate Bottomless Trap Hole. Now its removed from the game.

Duel Computer: I END MY TURN.

STOP ACTIVATING TRAPS FROM YOUR HAND!!

TOTAL SCORE: 93 IDIOT POINTS

Spark: I draw. I play Calling all Elements so I can summon every card fwith "Sparky" in its name from my graveyard. So Blue Mechaflame, Fire, Bubble, and Mecha in my grave.

(Blue Mechaflame)ATK1200, (Fire) Atk1200, (Bubble) ATK800 (Mecha) ATK 1400 = 4600

Spark 3300 Duel Computer 0

What the heck was that?! He activated a super-cheap card and summons everybody and then the game... sorta just stops. He never attacked, he never won, and nothing ever happened afterwards. Here's my guess of what happened...

Duel Computer: I USE I WIN. THE CARD SAYS I WIN. SO I WIN.

Sparky: Nooooo!!

Sparky blows up and the world turns into a bowl of tapioca pudding. Then the sun grabs the pudding and enjoys it before exploding, leaving nothing left in the solar system except for grape jam and the Intergalactic Girrafe Police Force.

TOTAL SCORE: 112 IDIOT POINTS.

EPIC FAILURE

 

I have NOTHING good to say here except quit while you're ahead. This story is CRAP CRAP CRAP, makes no eff-ing sense, and is a totally useless waste of space! Somebody lock this crap NOW!! YOU HAVE NO PLOT, NO CHARACTERS, NO EXPOSITION, NO LOCATIONS, NO EXPOSITION, NO HOPE, NO CHANCE AND NO FREAKING LITERARY EXPERTISE!! JUST STOP TRYING!! PLEASE!! AND HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

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