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Yu-Gi-Oh!: Future Visions (Ch.16) (PG-16)


RyanAtlus

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Yo, lately I've felt badly about not reading further than the first chapter of your story, and so I read THE SECOND chapter today!! And my thoughts on them?

 

They were harshly realistic!! I felt badly when I realized that this girl wouldn't be winning today! We're not accustomed to seeing the good guys lose! So I think you helped us identify with the main character really well, and your realism is top-notch. The only bad things I noticed were FEW typing errors. Only two or three.

 

So that one loss taught me that you put SO MUCH EFFORT into this story, and I shall now read one chapter a day!! Hoorah!!

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I don't recall that from Ocarina of Time anywhere

 

That's because OoT only showed the last 20 minutes of the Tree's life. But he did say it very often when he still was alive. He just loved reading YuGiOh fanfiction.

 

Anyways: chapter 6 is being betaread at the moment.

 

EDIT: Chapter 6 is up. Hurray for terrible Decks that are qualified as being super special awesome in fanfiction.

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My thoughts on Chapter 3: I liked the duel, it had some cool stuff in it.

 

My only problem is... Agido. You said it was a red orb. It had a big eye and wore golden armor on its body. An orb... with a body?! That sounds a little funny.

 

I also liked your use of the Konami code, whether they used it in the actual anime or not.

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personally I dislike the use the bible in the chapter' date=' but fortunately that was only a small part of it

[/quote']

 

Then I advise you never to read 'His Dark Materials' by Pullman. Over a thousand pages and God was mentioned in more than half of them.

 

oh don't worry, I'll just think during that whole time what he said is complete BS anyway

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personally I dislike the use the bible in the chapter' date=' but fortunately that was only a small part of it

[/quote']

 

Then I advise you never to read 'His Dark Materials' by Pullman. Over a thousand pages and God was mentioned in more than half of them.

 

oh don't worry, I'll just think during that whole time what he said is complete BS anyway

 

Yes indeed. All hail the church of scientology.

 

My thoughts on Chapter 3: I liked the duel' date=' it had some cool stuff in it.

 

My only problem is... Agido. You said it was a red orb. It had a big eye and wore golden armor on its body. An orb... with a body?! That sounds a little funny.

 

I also liked your use of the Konami code, whether they used it in the actual anime or not.

[/quote']

 

Solution: Agido is an orb-like creature.

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I've finally read chapter 4. The things I liked:

 

1. The funky tune! Can't go wrong with the word 'funky'.

 

2. There's a guy with a mustache. No matter who it may be, if there's a guy with a mustache, the scene feels AWESOME.

 

3. Absolutely EVERYTHING is determined with card games! I wish the real world had to do with a game. Unless we killed people. That would be bad.

 

4. Greed hits you with a big block of gold in a comical way (or at least, that's how I see it). It's cool!

 

BAD STUFFS:

 

You called Greed a "Trad Card". What color is that kind of card?

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Okay, sorry to tell you guys, but I won't update anything until let's say the twentieth.

While I'm doing exams and things, you guys'll be pretty bored.

That's why I'm just going to give a little spoiler of what you're going to see in 2010:

[spoiler=Decktypes of which I'm sure a character will use on-screen]

Frogs

X-Saber

Exodia

Junk / Synchro

Dragon / Fiend / Beatdown

Blackwings

Counter Fairies

DAD

 

 

[spoiler=Decks that will be used, but not a guaranteed on-screen appearance]

Flamvell

Ice Barrier

Psychic

Red-Eyes

Ally of Justice

Penguins

Batterymen

 

 

Also, I'm still looking for a Deck that could be suitable for ... a midget vertically challenged person..

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  • 2 weeks later...

My exams are over, I'll get my report card tomorrow.

I will start working on the next chapter soon, and since I've been neglecting this fic, I'm going to leave a boring filler without any plot-realated things nor character development out, and whatever character development that was planned to be in it will be replaced. Chapter 7 will be a longer one, even with the Duel cut in 2 parts. Right now, this fic isn't satisfying yet. As I've mentioned before, the plot will thicken troughout December/January, and after that there will be loads of Duels with up-to-date Decktypes. I'm planning to use all the TCG Duel Terminal archetypes for the moment, but also some older ones.

 

Also; don't blame me for injuring your favourite 5D's character (me guessing around February), but I actually can't stand him because his Decktype annoys me IRL. (Spoilers!) I didn't want him to be in this fic originally, but since it takes place in the dimension of 5D's, somewhere in the six months between season 1 and 2, I'm kinda forced to include him.

I hope I can update soon.

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