Armz' weird re-write of GX - Episode 17 features Dio Brando

[Toffee.]

I'm too lazy to add punctuation and grammer and what-not, as some of it might be deliberate.

 

[spoiler=Lets play Pokemon Yellow - 01: Your First Pokemon!]

So we open up to a beautiful a sunrise over the city of DominoNew Jersey. Yes, New Jersey. The "camera" slides down a bit to show the rest of the city, it looks amazing(use your immagination), and then we finally welcome in our main charactorhero-type-person, Jaden. Honestly, his name sucks. So Jaden is 'dashing' twords Professor Oak's LabDuel Academe, because he slept in, and can possibly miss out on getting a Starter Pokemon forgot how early the "try-outs" for Duel Academe are.

[spoiler=He looks like Jet-Link from Cyborg009]

 

Anyway, Jaden is talking to himself as he flys as fast as Neo from the Matrix runs to the try-outs area, saying he has only 2 minutes left. Honestly, these hypethical 2 minutes last forever btw. Jaden, who is still running, cracks a joke that he can possibly be late and get detention, despite the fact how he cant.

Jaden: "Author, why do you hate me?"

Me: "Because your not Jim"

Jaden: "Hes not until season 2!"

Me: "[trollface.jpg]"

Alright, so Jaden just so happens to run up to Yugisome unknown character who decides to punch jaden in the face, mid-running-

[spoiler=and Jaden falls to the floor.]

 

Mysterious charactor tells Jaden that he sucks@Yugimonz, and gives him some randm card he bought at the flea market, thinking it can help this noob.

Jaden thanks him for the yard-sale card, and bows some kind of "Thank you".

Now in the 4Kids dub, Yugi gives jaden a thumbs up. No. Just no.

Instead, he flips Jaden off, because I know RAEG is probobly reading this and going "YESH! YEESH!!". But anyway.. Jaden still stands there for like a whole 2 minutes(hes late, yay) and then looks at his card are is somewhat "OMFGWUT" over how his free leapfrogfreebie-card has a built in sound recording of a Kuriboh. Yugi is only a "gangsta", because again, I know RAEG is probobly laughing really hard at these past moments. By this point, lets break for the theme song

Jaden: "FINDIN TRUBL NEVAH 2 HAR-"

*shoots jaden*

-This re-make has no theme song, as 4kids already killed it-

Jaden: "Cant we just start at the try-outs already?"

Me: "Fine, if it gets you to shut up"

So now were at the Duel Academe

The announcer tells us some stuff were too lazy to listen too, and now the "camera" focuses on Crowler, whos is over in some of the bleachers. In this version, Crowler carries around a shotgun. I dont know why. Crowler is thinking how bad the duelists are, Cyrus, for example, as we see him take a direct attack from a freakin' Leghul. Cyrus has a completly open field, because he sucks at dueling(but only for the first part). Anyway, lets shift our attention to the rest of the bleachers, as we see more random background characters, and Chazz, who is sitting with 2 of his friends who are not Chazz. Chazz is awesome. Above chazz, who are standng on an upper part of the bleachers(lets say it has no guard rail, screw saftey) are Zane and Alexis. They dont really say anything, because they are cool like that. Anyway, the announcer at the academe says more stuff we dont care about, and the "camera" moves to outside. The parkinglot has a bunch of random cars, and a hovercraft in it. Zane drives the hovercraft. The guy at the booth, yes, theres a booth, is like: "Ok ladys, I think thats everyone", and Jaden comes exploding through the fence like the Cool-aid man, and he ven says "Oh Yea! I made it!". The guy at the booth says "Ur late, nub, so u cant come in", but Jaden doesnt listen to him and just walks by like nothing even happened. Were skipping footage because we need budget cuts, and more screen-time of the better charactors.

Jaden: "BUT IM TEH HEERO!"

Me: "No."

So Jaden made it inside the try-outs, getting past the guards, and doing everything Snake would.

So theres a duel going on with an instructer guy and Bastion. Instructer is @1800 Lifepoints, and Bastion is @3200.Mr.RefereeInstructor-pants lists off options on moves, in which bastion is all like: "n0 u! 1 u53 m41 r1ng 0f d357ru(710n!!"

Were due for another image, so lets use one:

[spoiler=BASTION USES THE AMERICAN VERSION OF RING OF DESTRUCTION]

REAL, FREAKIN' GRENADES. ITS SO MANLY

 

He destroys his own monster(Vorce Raider@1900), which ends the game in Bastions favor, since he used his "l337 5k1l_l_z".

Teh instructor is like: "Congratz, newbie, you passed"

Bastion, nah, forget it. Bastion is promoted to the rank of RaMega-Chicken Yellow.

The "camera" now focuses more on Jaden, as he lacks the screen-time that other screen-hogging non-Chazz/Jim/Zane charactors do. Jaden is literaly LOLing@Cyrus because hes a rook, and how Jaden is "teh leetist 1 heer". He comments that Bastion did a "gud jawb", and we move on. K?

One of Crowler's employees is like "R A MAN OR A GRL LOLOL"We fired that employee, so we pass of this part. Crower decides to duel our fan-character, Jaden, because he figures we can just expell him now and save us all the trouble. And because everyone bugged him into "1 last duel". Oh and-

[spoiler=if Crowler had a lazor]

He would be firin it

 

Crowler decides to use him "real" deck, and wants to rid the world of Jaden now, to save us all the trouble.

Jaden: "But I can still win, right?"

Me: "No"

Jaden: "Please?"

Me: "No, and you cant use Chowder's extended 'please' to bug me into letting you win"

Jaden: [sadface.jpg]

Me: "FINE. BUT YOU STILL HAVE TO SUFFER."

Jade: *pays me 500$ because of some bet you didnt see*

Cowler calls up Shepard and tells him of his plans to build a new death star

Shepard makes a comment about that guy we fired earlier, and his un-needed comment.

Crowler tells him the guy we fired was a background charactr, and we dont care anyway. Shepard agrees. Back over on Jaden's side of the bleachers, hes like: "LOL IMA B TEH NEXT KING OV TEH GAEMS!". Bastion is like: "l0l n00bz", and Jaden walks down- No, he "teleports" over to the duel ring. Part 1 of episode 1 ends here, as the awesome duel with Crowler needs its own mini-episode, due to sheer awesomeness.

 

[spoiler=Episode 1, part 2 - SURPRISE GEAR GOLEM!]

Previously on episode 1, stuff that sets up this part. Jaden walks down some immaginary stairs, and onto the duel arena. Theres a randomly placed patch of grass over by where crowler would be standing. Jaden opens his Pokedex and uses it to look up the Pokemon called "Ancient Gear Golem". He learns(wow). He learns that Gear Golem can be found in an enviROment where Crowler might have ben at and/or where he might be at. So Jaden walks over to this random patch of grass, and-

*WILD POKEMON APPEARED!*

Crowler appears, using his ninja skills. Yes, ninja skills. and challanges Jaden to a duel. Jaden thinks Crowler's Duel Disk- ITS A GUITAR. CROWLER CAN PLAY EXPERT MODE ON GUITAR HERO. Jaden has the 1st move, so he starts off by Summoning E-Hero non-Celtic Guardian-Avian to the field. Avian shows off his manlyness by rising up into the air and then appearing in a shower of fire. Sort of like Captain Falcon. Avian is also in attack mode, because it doesnt matter. Jaden sets 1 face-down, and says his turn ends. Crowler plays Confiscation, its so pro, paysgains 1000 lifepoints to discard 1 of Jaden's card. He discard's Jaden's pot of Greed, because he uses that over Monster Reborn. Crowler sets 2 cards face-down and plays Heavy Storm. Jaden wishes he could ragequit beacause his face-down is Spellbinding Circle, but this isnt Wc10. Crowler's 2 face-downs were Statue of Manyless. when destroyed while face-down, they Special Summon 2 Manyless tokens. Both of which, resemble Super Macho-Man from Punch-Out Wii. Jaden calls out "BOGUS!" and then Crowler tells him "Lets release it!" Now before he "Releases"(Japanese term for Tribute btw..) his Tokens, the tokens also give the field this awesome dark cloudy appearence-

[spoiler=Like so]

 

Now even though that background disapears after the tokens leave, in THIS version the background stays, because it makes the field and the game look 500 times more awesome. So after crowler Releases the bogus his tokens, he Summons the manliest card in this entire episode, Ancient Gear Golem.

[spoiler=AND THIS FIC USES GEAR GOLEMS ANIME ARTWORK]

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

 

Crowler laughs like a mad-man as this giant mecha composed of roman armor and giant gears literaly builds itself from parts that were reserected from the ground, in a manner thats similar to

. Because detail like this, with giant mechas of impending doom, is quite rare.

Jaden: "But Avian didnt-"

[spoiler=*Gear Golem used Mechanized Melee*]

Avian takes 3000 damage

 

Jaden seems confused as hes already down by 3000 Lifepoints, and its not even the Battle Phase of Crowler's turn yet.

Crowler declares "The killing blow" of his giant golem, and we see the gears in this machine starts turning really fast, and it winds its fist back to break Jaden.

Jaden, at this point, is like "UR CHEETING!"

Crowler tells him this is how fan-fic are-

[spoiler=and Golem punches Avian again.]

Avian takes 3000 damage

 

Jaden, now at -2000, wonders why hes still in the game.

[spoiler=Gear Golem Punches Avian because Jaden is stupid]

Avian takes 3000 damage

 

(Jaden@-5000)

Jaden: "But I-"

[spoiler=Gear Golem Punches Avian because Jaden is stupid, Q4E]

Avian takes 3000 damage

 

(Jaden @-8000)

Jaden wines that this game is too hard for the "kids", and Crowler tells Jaden that hes really Dr.Wily-

[spoiler=And Gear Golem Punches Avian, again]

Avian takes 3000 damage

 

[spoiler=And again]

Avian takes 3000 damage

 

Jaden, currently half-dead because this children's card-game inflicts real damage via holograms, is somehow still standing@-14,000 Lifepoints. Crowler laughes some more at how awesome this is-

[spoiler=And Gear Golem Punches Avian yet again]

Avian takes 3000 damage

 

[spoiler=And again for teh lulz]

Avian takes 3000 damage

 

Jaden is currently @-20,000 Lifepoints, and wishes he could still win this. But he remembers that if watching long hours of Yugimonz season 1 has taught us anything, is that card games can BKSS anything to make it work. Jaden draws 1 card out of thin air, and Summons Winged Kuriboh. He explains that the BKSS of this game implies that regardless of what hapens, Jaden still wins.

Crowler's Lifepoints miraculously say "lose", and Jaden somehow is declared the winner, despite him having -20,000 Lifepoints. Just for laughs, we have the entire school be all shocked at how Jaden is the one who posses the BKSS, and how they all wants to auto-kill Jaden in future episodes.

Episode 1 ends here, we show a fast-forward version of the credits, and we pause somehwere in there because McDonalds is a sponcer to this "show".

 

[spoiler=Episode 2 - Stage Mini-Boss, Chazz]

This episode opens to what I think is the opening theme, but really we just have the "camera" watch the flower water go by. Ahh, what a nice view. We even see a dolphin jump, just for lulz. We now focus in on some random Helicoptor, because the whole population of 5 main charactors "just-so-happens" to fit inside of it. Either that, or we abandoned everyone els and just let Jaden, cyrus, and like 5 random people visit jurrasic park duel academe. Dont worry, theres no food on the island. We now focus on an ariel view of the island, because we want to emphasis on how "alone" this island is, and how no one can possibly help themfrom the dinosaurs

-Again, were skipping the themesong, as it sucks-

Alright, so now lets have the "camera" focus on the main building, which then fades to an inside view of the place.

[spoiler=We get a look at the inside]

and its your basic teaching area with a giant screen

 

Secretly, while the "camera" isnt looking, we watch youtube videos all day.

Also, if you noticed, the whole population of DA is in that screenshot. Again, we only had enough helicoptor space to fit just those people(its Jaden+his "friends" and a few background charactors. Were set)

Shepard explains something about how the dorms are like Stages in this Game, and how the better your skills are, the higher you can progress. Or something like that.

Anyway, we then get an outside view of Jaden and Cyrus sitting over by 1 of the statues. Jaden, for like 2 seconds, looks like a madman.

[spoiler=And I can only imaginae whats on that PDA-thing]

Hes really sending useless spam messages to everyone except Chazz and Zane.

Because he thinks everyone on this island can win a free PS3 if they tell him there social security numbers.

 

Sadly, it never worked. Bastion walks by, says some random jiberish on how he has "l337 5k1l_l_z" and how "J4d3n 1z 5u(h a n00b"

We then get a look at hotel mariothe red dorm. Its basicly a hotelcondo-type thing without an instruction booklet, wait, no, we see Cyus actually looking for that instruction booklet, because he needs help on getting into 1 of the 7 hotels. No, Bowser doesnt exist in this time frame.

Jaden opens the door to his room, and wow, just wow. It has 2 beds for the 3 people, and has a computer + youtube. AS LONG AS WE HAVE YOPUTUBE, WERE FINE. K, GUYS?. Cyrus makes a comment on how them being Slifer-Students, its likethe time of teh PharoahMike Smith(lolhypethicalname). JADEN IS NOT YAMI. Cyrus could MAYBE be Kaiba, but thats until much later.

Anyway, Jaden is SNOOOPING AS USUAL and decides to see who is sleeping in his bed.

[spoiler=and to our surprise, its...]

 

 

[spoiler=Jaden and Cyrus have a reaction to this]

No, hes not really Weegee. I only did that because its funny.

 

So we get a look at weegeeChumley, who appearently resembles a Koala. Wut.

Cyrus is trying not to laugh, but he keeps it together for the audience.

Mr.Koala-Pants explains hes lazy, then Jaden, Cyrus, and Chumley all introduce themselves. Chumley explains why we(The non-Chazz cast) are in the red base. We then focus our "camera" on a random image of Chazz, Not-Chazz-Bastion, and Not-Chazz-Jaden n a turn table infront of the main building, sort of like a Stage Select and/or charactor selection menu, before we play mortal combat. But no, this isnt that kind of game.

watch from 4:01 to 4:11.

IT MAKES PERFECT SENCE.

....

ANYWAY..

Some stuff happens and now we see Cyrus and Jaden walking outside the dorm, unaware of the Smoker that ontop of the building, and the Witch just behind the bush. PEELZ HERE! Shut up Luis! We need those for Bill!

......

We see Cyrus on fire, because its like one of those "IM GONNA BE THE VERY BEST, LIEK NO ONE EVAR WAZ!!1" moments.

we then have the "camera" move to an inside view of the main building's hallways, because Jaden and Cyrus are heading to the in-door tacobellduel arena. It went from being 12:00 in the morning, to 6:00 at night in a matter of 8 seconds. Shush.

[spoiler=Jaden is still looking up, thinking theres a menu there, despite the fact how I crossed that part out]

 

Dont worry, I ordered us some take-out

Everyone in Red: "YAY!!1

Jaden: "But wouldnt that make you a Slif-"

SHUT IT.

THE RED ONLY MAKES ME GO FASTER.

AND YOUR ONLY GETTING SCREENTIME IS BECAUSE WE KNOW THE 8-YEAR-OLDS BACK HOME ARE OVER-OBSESSED WITH YOUR HERO-GIMMIC.

No, we cant say Marvelun-named hero company, or els we get sued, and the show can poissibly end.

....

MARVEL MARVEL MERVEL MARVEL MARVEL MERVEL MARVEL MARVEL MERVEL MARVEL MARVEL MERVEL MARVEL

.......

Wut? Marvel is a sponcer? DANG IT!!

CURSE US AND OUR GENERIC SUPERHERO FEDISH!!!

On-Topic: Cyrus comments on that it would be amzing to duel inside this area, and we see Cazz's's'z''zs(his name cant be plural). We see Chazz' non-Chazz friends who are standing ontop of the Chazz-owned arena. Chazz' to "friends" walk over anc omment that people who are stuck on stage 1 cant enter stage 3 unless they beat stage 2. Lawl. So Chazz decides to teleport over, because he remembers this is free-EXP week, and that random Slifer-newbies deliberatly come over to this arean to be PK'D by the higher-level students.

[spoiler=Chazz issues Jaden a Kaiba Glare]

And it lowers his DEF by 50%

 

Anyway, Chazz' friends taunt Jaden some more, because its so pro to be a level 60 and say "LOL UR A NOOB" to a level 59 player. Because as we all know, your only a non-noob until you reach level 60. Level 59 means you still fail.

Ok, lets stop the Runescape-shenanigens for now. K?

Chazz' friends say Chazz is going to be the new King of Teh yugimonz. Jaden says "NO U!" and tells that that its his job, and he is the main charactor. Chazz, in the background, wishes to put that theory to the test, and challanges Jaden to a 1-on-1 PVP match.

Chazz also coments that the author of this fic still plans to give Jaden the BKSS log- HEY!

Because of that, Jaden suffers. Happy now?

*Chazz pays me 500$*

*chazz gives me another 500$ so he can use B& cards*

Easy 1000$ :3

Alexist teleports in- You know what, no, she doesnt. We dont need a love interest. This show is too manly for that, unless it volves Zero and Iris.

So we see a few inside-shots of the dorms, eating there dinner. King Harkinain is a special guest inside the blue dorm. Its funny, K? We then have the "camera" show some water rushing up onto some rocks, and then it scrolls up to the area in which non-Chazz-Jaden is dueling Chazz.

Yea, we skipped the whole "slifer reds have dinner, chazz calls jaden, jaden excepts duel via PM" gimmic. Its just filler, and doesnt add to this plot.

And I like how the PDA has a timer on how long the message lasts. *sigh* if only this were James Bond, we could end it here and now. Also, we lack enough Rupees to have morshuour pyro technician rig us up and exploding PDA.

We use some old fottage to show that Jaden "walked" to the arena, where chazz is waiting.

Also I like how-

[spoiler=Jaden starts with 1 card, when compared to Chazz' 5 cards]

Thats not a typo, that edit actually reads 9000

 

Lets cut it here, let the author have a small break to post this, and then we begin the fight scene between main hero and Chazz, who is are home-world boss for the evening.

 

[spoiler=Episode 2/2 - Enter Chazz]

The duels starts off like it ended in episode 2/1, where Jaden starts with 1 card in his hand and 4kids Lifepoints and Chazz starts with his Chazz-hand of 5 cards and 9000 Lifepoints. This fanfic is awesome.

Chazz start off the duel-

[spoiler=And to our surprise, he topdecks into]

 

Chazz says to Jaden that this duel will end in like 5 second.

So right away, he uses the effect of Thunder Dragon. He discards it to add 2 Thuner Dragon from his deck to his hand. He then uses the effect of Dark Thunder Dragon, in which he discards that from his hand to send 5 DARKs from his deck to the Graveyard, and draw 1 card.

Chazz is on fire.

So Chazz decides to let the rook waste all his 1 card right away, so he summons a RebornDemonic Motor Zombie to the field, and sets 1 face-down(sparks), and ends his turn. The turn comes to Jaden, who is surprised at how awesome this Demonic Motor Zombie looks, and how he wishes he had a zombie with gears sticking out of it, that just-so-happens to have 1 laser eye. Sort of like Transmetal 2 Dinobot.

Anyway, Jaden draws a card, which just-so-happens to be Pot of Greed. He explains that Pot of Greed was a card made by Kazuki Takahasi, it has a green boarder, its a normal spell with an image of a jar on it, which has an evil face, it also has white text for its name, and also comments on how it looks good as an Ultra Rare. He then tells us that it lets him take his hand and placde it on his deck to take the 2 cards from it which is condered a draw and then he adds those 2 cards to his hand as its how the draw function of this game goes. Yes, it took about 3-5 lines to explain how Pot of Greed works, as we all know the audince can never remember how it goes, despite the fact how they have seen it at least 64564634634646 times in the anime.

Owait, the duel. Anyway...

Jaden's hand has Avian, Burst-lady, and Polymer in it. Jaden then tells us he fuses his cards together, but first, he comments that he will use Winged Kuriboh later. WE THEN USE THE SAME OLD FOOTAGE OF JADEN USING POLYMER, BECAUSE WE FORGOT THAT AND HAD TO DO A RE-DO IN THE ANIMATION, BECAUSE SOMEHOW WE ARE AS INTELLGENT AS 4KIDS ITSELF. Think I'm crazy?

Watch from 1:32 to 1:57. And just because we know the audience missed that, we replay that exact moment just to add more filler to this show. Jaden explans that he Summons E-Hero Flame Wingman, who appears in a glowing ball of awesome-

[spoiler=just like Captain Falcon]

 

 

We then see a glimpse of an actual Fusion monster being held by Jaden. Honestly, I didnt think Fusion monster existed in teh anime, mostly because when ever someone would summon it, the cards themselves would literaly merge to form a purpe card. But ehh, what can you do.

Anyway, Jaden summons his version of Batman, who clearly isnt Batman.

Chazz laughs at how stupid Jaden is, and uses the effect of Demonic Motor Zombie. By revealing his face-down Sparks, he can use that card's energy to turn Zombie into a perma-Brain control. Yes, Chazz now has Flame Wingman, and Jaden's field is empty. Hurray. Now because his monster was taken over by Zombie, Flame Wingman now has gears appear on its body, because its not Demonic Motor Wingman. A much more awesome version of E-Hero Flame Wingman. Cyrus makes a comment on how Chazz knows how to play a card. Wow. Jaden then Summons E-Hero Clayman in defence position, which makes a punching motion before it "appears" in defence position. Couldnt we have turned this card around to where he punches in Jaden's general direction? Honestly, who writes this stuff? Owait....

Chazz has a turn now who Summons Demonic Motor Awesome Soldier, and when its summoned, it auto-kills Clayman and deals 1800 damage to Jaden. Jaden is now@2200. Chazz then attacks Jaden with Demonic Motor Wingman, leveling Jaden's field and leaving him@100. Chazz reminds Jaden of

what Wingman does, and you guessed it-

[spoiler=JADEN GETS A FACE FULL OF FIRE! =D]

 

 

We could say this show ends now because Jaden dies via massive brns, but lets have it continue, K?

Fun-Fact: Slifer rhymes with any word that starts with S. Yes, this includes Slifer Ham.

Mmmmmm..... Ham......

So Chazzset 1 card face-down, which is obveiously what wins the duel, and ends his turn there.

Jaden has a mini-sizure and acts like hes crying, which turns into a laugh of "happyness".

QUICK! CALL THE WAAAAAAAAAMBULANCE!

>_>

<_<

Anyway, Jaden summons E-Hero Sparkman and attacks Demonic Motor Awesome Soldier, Chazz takes 1 bit of lifepoint damage, and Jaden takes exactly 99 damage, putting him @1 Lifepoint. He asks what happened, and Chazz reminds him of his Soldier's ability to inflict random amounts of damage to each player apon its destruction.

[spoiler=Oh, and the effect caused Jaden to be shot by a laser beam]

 

 

Anyway, Chazz reminds us that Jaden's best card is about to become his. Wait, are we really implying some kind of Pokemon logic here? Really? If so... GO CHAZZ! GO CHAZZ! GO CHAZZ!

Now in the Dub, Jaden makes a turn around. No, just no.

In THIS fanfic, we do it a little differently.

See, apon Jaden using his Mirror Gate, Chazz reveals his face-down, a card called Chaos-Emperor Calling. What this does, is it allows him to destroy all cards on the field as a cost to activate this card. And after that happens, he can freely Summon a Chaos Emperor Dragon to the field. Good thing his Graveyard has 3 LIGHTs and 5 DARKs in it from earlier(chazz discard his Thunder Dragons when you werent looking)

So now the field is full of 1 Chaos-Emperor Dragon. Jaden looks at it like, "O MAI GAWD, DAT CARD IZ LIEK TEST BEST THING EVAH!". Indeed Jaden, indeed it is. Chazz then announces his attack of Chaos Emperor, whith an attack called 'Doomsday Forever'. God, thats such an awesome attack name. Chaos Emperor, with its 3k ATK, attacks Jaden directly.But of course, just as that 1 Lifepoint hits 0, they all decide to leave for fear of the night-watch janitor. Really, they did.After, Jaden explains how he still would have won, because he could use Winged Kuriboh. My foot he would, because regardless of what happens, he still lost.

Chazz only lost 1 Lifepoints the enitre duel. Awesome.

Regardless, they still "technicly" called it off, before Chazz' awesomeness is too much for this fic to take.

Episode 2 ends here, with a theme-song-less credits that desplys all our sponsors.

 

 

[spoiler=Episode 3, Budget cuts]

Whole episode in a nut-shell:

Crowler sends Jaden a "love-letter" which is signed by Alexis, they were suposed to go to a Ric Astley concert, but contact with the outside world would reveal our wearabouts.

Cyrus gets the note instead, ugh, and tries to be all "OMG I LUV U 2!!!"

Cyrus uses a boathydrofoil to go across the 3 inch lake that is the creek that seperates the dorms. Basicly he used the hydrofoil as a bridge. Jaden duels Aleixis because Cyrus was "traped" in the Obelisk Blue Girl's dorm slash(/) dungeon. Wait, why dont Slifer and Ra Girls have there own dorms? What kind of island is this? Anyway, more of that is crap we dont need. Jaden duels Aleixis, some crap goes on about loldirectattacks and jaden wins agenst alexis. Fail.

Instead of still getting them expelled, cardgames have some sort of "honor" system to them, and they let Jaden and Cyrus go.

 

tl;dr: This episode sucks, so we skip it and move on to episode 4, which has giant killer robots in it. Awesome.

 

[spoiler=Episode 4 - Prelude to awesome]

So we open up with a nice view of the ocean. If it were up to me, we would be watching it all day, because its nice and relaxing. But ehh.... Anyway, the "camera" focuses on some navy helicoptors. Guys, there just trading cards. Seriously, they haad freakin' carriers, submarines, speed-boats, helicoptors- THERE JUST TRADING CARDS! But as we all know, your avarage over-obsessed player(me) would literaly go incredible hulkto great lengths to get the latest cards(Scrap monsters <3). On-Topic: We then see a sped-up scene where the "camera" shows us going a turbo speed. What? Somethings wong with the G-Difuser? WELL DO A BARREL ROLL! Slippy, wheres that health gauge? I cant tell how many times I need to shoot this island before it explodes.

........

So really, they hired the freakin' navy to get these tradeing cards over to jurrasic park. Now the reason why I didnt cross that out is because the students here at DA literarly are in raptor form, ready to tear these guys apart. no wonder they needed all this artillery.

Ok, I'm skipping ahead. Jaden is currently sleeping in, as usual, Cyrus thinks that he can get a lucky pull if he asks some poster of Slifer teh Executive Producer. No, this isnt abridged, we dont have THAT much money. Also, we lack Kaiba. So thats why. Anyway, Chumley says some stuff we dont listen too. The "Camera" now focuses on Cyrus who is going at turbo-speed to the card shop(TAKE ME WITH YOU!!!), and of course-

[spoiler=he falls over]

 

I dont know why we kept that footage, but it seemed so funny when he fell over. Anyway, we have the "Camera" pan up to see the main building, which we then get to fade to the inside of teh building.

Jaden wakes up an hour earlier(NOOO! E-HEROS ARE THE BEST TRADEBAIT!! DX)

And as hes running up the hill, he notices that Dorthy is stuck on the hill, her cargolf cart got stuck, and shes trying to push it up the hill. Really, I dont think its that hard. AND DORTHY IS CLEARLY STRONG ENOUGH TO PUSH THAT CART. But no, this part implies that our main hero can help this innocent bistandard for a card pack that contains the winning card. Oh how we <3 forshadowing. So somehow the combined strenght of The Incredible HulkDorthy and some wimpy 16(16?) year old, they fnally make it up the hill. At least they missed class, right? Anyway, sometime later Crowler is laughing at how much fail Jaden is, and somewhere along that line-

[spoiler=he makes such a lulz face]

 

Appearently our camera likes to record people doing stupid stuff. Oh well.

So later on, Bastion wakes up "73h n00bz"(Q4E) and reminds them they missed the cards. Bastion is so pro that he never bothered going. Somehow this is proof that hes "l337". Anyway, our main hero and his sidekick(no, not Batman & Robin). Jaden comments about how new cards spell good in the morning.

........

Fun-Fact: The rubbermaid tub in my closet that contains a bunch of random cards, still has that new card smell to it. It smells like lumber with a hint of cheese. I dont know why, but I

like that smell. LOLYUGIOCARDSARECRACK. Even if you read that, it makes sence.

Anyway, the whole 5 card packs arrive at the store, and really-

[spoiler=its like its Black Friday]

 

 

Anyway, our "Camera" got some shots of a bunch of guard-like-characters swaming the area because the population of 12 kids is too much for these hardcore guard-dude of sheermanlyness. OWAIT, THATS RIGHT, GUNS ARE ILLAGLE ON THIS ISLAND.

Ok, so maybe with that, the students COULD be pretty threatning.

So on with the story!

So now ome army general guy is like: "Looking for these?", and the whole 12 students are like: "*[awesomeface.jpg]*".

And I like how he says "Come and get it", implying there only 1 card packs.

[spoiler=Really, we only had enough for 1 pack]

 

But appearently Crowler wants to play a game of Tag, since he runs a fleamarket of cards in his jacket, and they are appearently "good" cards. So we need to chase after him. On second thought, no. Anyway, the store clerk tels the students that its a first come first serve gimmic. Now heres what I dont get, they opened the door like 3 seconds ago. So Crowler probobly stole them as soon at the breifcase was open. Wow. Now why cant other students have that kind of speed? Honestly.

Also-

[spoiler=Crowler tells us something]

Mah boi, these cards are what all true duelists strive for!

 

Anyway, Jaden and Cyrus make it to the store finally. And heres something I find interesting, Jaden asks if they have any card packs left, the store clerk says they only have 1, and gives/i] the pack to Jaden.

Now let me get this stright, the cards here are free?

.........

.............

*goes in time machine*

*punches crowler and steals his "disguise"*

*ends up being the one who takes EVEY pack*

So Dorthy tells our hero she had 1 pack left.

............................

*repeats the last time machine shenanigens*

This pack has a Winged Kuriboh in it!?! WHAT THE CRAP!?!?!

*time machines back and gives dorthy the pack*

Ok, so Jaden has a Winged Kuriboh now. Regardless, it still sucks.

So some time later Chazz is yelling at his friends for not getting him any cards. CHAZZ, YOU HAVE ENOUGH MONEY TO BUY THE WHOLE STORE. WHY DIDNT YOU!?!?

Chazz: "Because I'm not a plot device"

Thats true, as Chazz getting Winged Kuriboh would completely ruin the plot. So anyway, our mysteryman who obveiously was Crowler, tells Chazz that hes Crowler. Wow, just wow.

So Crowler informs Chazz that our script requires him to actualy beat Jaden, instead of calling it off because our hero used the "Run" function of our battle system. CURSE YOU RPGS!!

>_>

<_<

So now were at the duel arena, theres other people dueling in the background, but they suck anyway. Crowler tells Jaden that hes dueling Chazz. How nice. I like how they set up a floor audience, as we need all the casualtys we can get. But dont worry, all these background charactors are easily replaceable. I'm cutting it here, as the duel needs to take up a whole episode. Why? because we need to be "accurate" to the TV show: Plot first -> duel second -> ??? -> profit

We didnt use that many images, because we all know about the impending doom in the following episode.

Also, appearently Cartoon Network wants to hire us. OH JOY!

 

 

[spoiler=Episode 4.2 - Mighty Morphing Chazz Rangers]

Chazz: "Are we filimg or what?"

Sorry, I got sidetracked, as I was watching the latest episode of 5Ds

Chazz: "5Ds?"

Oh yea, its this cool series that takes place-

Yea, nevermind, that doesnt happen for like another 20-ish years.

Everyone els: "........."

..............

God, that was such an awesome episode.

Anyway, we continue episode 4.

So as we last left our hero, he was about the face off agenst then white rangerChazz.

Chazz, for this episode, your using a different deck.

Chazz: "Wait, what?"

Its has giant robots in it, and this time your victory counts infront of a live audience.

Chazz: "Casualties?"

A LOT.

Chazz: "This episode is win"

I know right? and We havent even started yet.

Ok, so Chazz is dueling Jaden, this time were starting it off "fair", with both of them @4000 Lifepoints.

Anyway, Crowler tells our Hero(Chazz) that hes dueling Jaden, and he hopes Jaden manged to get some of the new cards he stole, because clearly Chazz has the most awesome deck at this point.

Bastion, in the background, is like: "ITS A TRAP!". Bastion tries to be Admiral Ackbar for a minute, though he is correct. ITS A TRAP! GET OUT OF THERE CHAZZ! YOU DONT NEED TO DUEL THIS ROOK! THERE ARE BETTER OPPONENTS OUT THERE!

Chazz: "But I get to use giant robots in this...."

........ Oh yea, thats right.

Crowler has this obsession of seeing Jaden lose infront of everyone.

You know, plenty of people lose infront of everyone in this "school", and you know what happens? Absolutely nothing.

Ok, lets just get on with this awesome showdown of The White RangerChazz vs Lord ZedJaden.

Anyway, Jaden wants to start off this game, so he Summons a face-up E-Hero Clayman in upside down left-foot-on-green position, and ends his turn.

Chazz starts off by topdecking into Magical Mallet. This card lets him shuffle his hand, includng mallet, back into his deck and draw the same number of cards he had +2.

Cyrus says something about it being a "rare" card, and Bastion comments on how its a "d4ng3r0u5 0n3 @ 7h47".

Wait, Magical Mallet is both Rare and banworthy? What is this? Pojo?

So anyway, Chazz then uses a Spell card called "Command Center". This card does the same thing as Magical Mallet, but lets him actually pick out what cards he wants, as long as they have some relation to being machines and/or unions.

Chazz does so, and then Normal Summons-

[spoiler=White Tiger Zord]

Its actually white, the lens flare and the scenery make it look golden

 

Chazz then uses a card called "Docking Zone", which lets him Summon more 'Zord' monsters.

So next, he Special Summons-

[spoiler=Black Stealth Bomber Zord]

Again, the lighting in this area makes it appear blue, despite the fact how its really a dark blue/almost black color

 

If I get around to it, I will photoshop these images to be more accurate.

Chazz then tells us his 2 Zords can combine, just like any other Japanese mecha.

So now his field contins-

[spoiler=VW Megazord]

 

Cyrus complains that Chazz' turn is takes forever.

LOOK CYRUS, IF JADEN COULD RAGEQUIT, HE WOULD. BUT THIS ISNT WC10.

So now Chazz uses VW's ability, which causes a twister spinner to spin, and whatever it lands on, his monster has to go to that position.

It spins, and now Clayman has to be forced into Left-hand-red, Right-foot-yellow, left-foot-green, right-foot-red position. Oh, and tis causes Jaden to take damage if his monster is destryed.

In the Dub, Chazz' monster has an attack called "Heat Seeker Blitz", in which 3 of the 4 missles miss the target. Wow.

In this fic, all 4 missles hit the audience, and Clayman randomly explodes.

Jaden takes a random ammount of damage, because "his lifepoints are toast".

........

Jaden's Lifepoints currently stand@Toast

............

Thares a bunch of smoke from these dead bodies and destoyed arena, but Crowler and Shepard just stand from a distance IN THE ONLY SAFE BOX, and comment on what a good duel this is.

So for Jaden's turn, Chazz ended his turn btw, Jaden Summons E-Hero Sparkman in defence mode.

He "throws down a facedown". Jaden, why did you throw your card? Do you want to lose THAT badly? Really, that card could have saved you, but you threw it all the way across the arena.

Bastion says some comment about how this episode was doomed from the start, and how Chazz is obveiously more awesome at this game then Jaden is.

The whole audience is complang that that this match was "rigged". I'm not going to lie to you, it was. Realy, Chazz didnt even want to face this rook. Hes only doing so, because he gets to aim for the audience.

So now that its Chazz turn again, he Summons-

[spoiler=Blue Cannon Zord]

 

[spoiler=Yellow Tank Zord]

 

[spoiler=and Red Dragon Zord]

 

All in 1 turn, because I'm not going to list off all the cards he used to play them, he just plays them.

Chazz then has his 3 new Zords combine together to form-

[spoiler=XYZ Megazord]

 

He then tells our wanabee-hero(Jaden) that his Zords can cmbine even more, and then proceeds to Summon-

Wait for it, the Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers theme song needs to play a bit-

[spoiler=VWXYZ Ultrazord]

 

Chazz then tells us that his Ultrazord causes weaker monster to just "GTFO", and Jaden's sparkman does just that.

Also, our "camera" pans up to Chazz Ultrazord for a bit.

Why?

[spoiler=because I love this shot]

 

Jaden looks helpless agenst the power of this giant mecha, its so awesome.

Fun-Fact: the first un-censored cannon is aimed at jaden, and the 2nd cannon is aimed at the audience.

Oh how we <3 violence

Jaden would have had a chance to use that face-down card of his, but its far out of his reach.

Chazz has his Ultrazord attack Jaden directly, using its massive cannons to not only destroy 3000 points of Jaden's toast, but it also killed almost everyone in the audience.

The turn comes to Jaden, and I like how he comments that his deck is "a whole army of vicious monsters"

........

E-Heros, really? And a Winged Kuriboh?

.......................

Jaden obveiously works for Pojo or something.

Anyway, Jaden topdecks Transcended Wings. He Summons Winged Kuriboh and sets Transcended Wings, and ends his turn.

Chazz, right away, tells Jaden that his Kuriboh needs to GTFO, and it does just that.

BUT WAIT, JADEN REMEMBERS THAT HE CAN CHAIN HIS FACEDOWN AND STILL SUMMONED WINGED KURIBOH LEVEL 10.

......Chazz still has his cannons fire Winged Kuriboh because VWXYZ Ultrazord has two cannons, meaning his effect can be applied twice, as long as we spare the audience. Might as well, seeing as how Cyrus, Bastion, and Alexis cant die this easily.

(none of the other awesome charactors are here btw..)

Winged Kuriboh spontaniosly explodes, leaving jaden wide-open with 0 cards in his hand.

 

ULTRAZORD ATTACKS FOR GAME!

ULTRAZORD ATTACKS FOR GAME!

ULTRAZORD ATTACKS FOR GAME!

ULTRAZORD ATTACKS FOR GAME!

ULTRAZORD ATTACKS FOR GAME!

ULTRAZORD ATTACKS FOR GAME!

 

Chazz has his Ultrazord attack Jaden, dealing another 3000 points of damage to his Toast.

Jaden tells Chazz that his lifepoints are still @4000, and that Chazz was aming for Jaden's toaster.

Chazz grabs the toaster and throws it at Jaden, which causes Jaden to fall overbecome unconseious.

And as we all know how these "rules" go, if the duelist cant continue, then he "forefits"

Chazz, regardless, wins@DA, seeing as how a bunch of background characters died. Yay.

I'm cutting this episode here, as we need to re-build some of the stage for the next episode.

Oh, and Chazz-

Chazz: "Yea?"

You can keep that deck, as the "holograms" arent fake.

 

[spoiler=Episode 7 - Its not Halloween yet]

So we open up by having our "camera" show us the dock area, its all foggy and what-not, and we even see the lighthouse(yes, theres a lighthouse) shine in this fog. to be honest, it seems like a pretty nice spot to be at.

So Aleixis is SNOPPING AS USUAL we see, and she comes walking up to Zane(yay) and is all: "Zane? What are you doing out here!?"

But Zane is our serious cat, and he doesnt need to say anything, as Alexis gets the idea that Zane is too epic for any of this. Dont worry, thats what Episode 8 is for.

I dunno', Zane sort of complains that his brother shouldnt be here, as he only "pretends" to be "hopeless".

......................... Ok?

So now we have our "Camera" pan up to show some military vechicle heading for the red dorm.

PLEASE TAKE JADEN!

PLEASE TAKE JADEN!

PLEASE TAKE JADEN!

They all jump out of the vechicle, as it arrived at its destination, the red dorm. THERES LIKE 80 GUYS IN THAT VECHICLE.

Anyway, Banner wakes up, walks outside, and comments on how DA only uses a swat team when the dinosaurs escape fromjurrasic parkthings in DA go wrong.

TAKE JADEN!

So they walk over to Jaden's dorm-

TAKE JADEN!

And then the head officer walks over to the door

TAKE JADEN!

Opens the door.

DO IT! DO IT NAO!

And to our surprise

THEY TAKE JADEN!?!?

No.

They want Jaden and Cyrus.

EVEN BETTER!!! =D

So anyway, they explain that they are here for Jaden and Cyrus-

Wait, no, that would ruin the halloween episode.

>_>

<_<

So now Jaden and Cyrus are inside Darth Vader's room.

[spoiler=Really, it looks just like it]

 

So anyway, Jaden and Cyrus were reminded of un-seen event from a future episode that didnt happen yet. lol theres no logic to this.

Crowler decides that we cant just throw them out, even though we can, we instead have them "duel" to "keep there place". If I/Crowler dont want Jaden to be here, why dont we just feed him to the sharks now? I mean wouldnt that make Crowler(and myself) happier? So anyway, Crowler decides to arrange the whole thing. Why? Because he loves to have our 4th main charactor(1st being Jim, 2nd being Zane, 3rd being Chazz) suffer. JUST BOOT HIM OUT NOW! SAVE US THE TROUBLE!

But no.

Later on, Chumley and Alexis are at Shepard's office, and are trying to convince one of them to be Jaden's partner.

Guys, dont worry about it, Cyrus doesnt suck@dueling in this fic. HE RUNS GAOGAIGA- wait, that would ruin a future episode, but you already knew that :3

So back at the Red dorm Chumly gets back home, Cyrus runs up to "hug" him, when really he steals his wallet. How nice.

Anyway, we see Jaden on the table DELIBERATLY stacking his deck.

[spoiler=Think I'm crazy?]

 

Now heres where we go down hill, Jaden WANTS to duel with Cyrus.

Jaden, are you REALLY, REALLY sure you want to be overkilled like this?

owait, what do I care, I'm just the director/narator/script writer/YCM-user who is typing this fic.

So anyway, the Camera pans from the dorm to the volcano(DANG IT CHUMLY! YOU RUINED THE SHOT!), yes Chumley was standing there, to some random spot in which Jaden is dueling Cyrus.

We see some waves splash, for some sort of dramatic effect. Beautiful.

Chumly is above ground, as he knows he would just be a target for the duel, and Chumly mumbles some crap about how he hopes Jaden knows what hes doing. Alexis walks u to Chumley, and comments on how Jaden is freakin' doomed.

Yea, and Cyrus doesnt really look thrilled to go on with this, and killdefeat his best friend this easilyway. And as we can tell by Jaden's stacking, he uses the Wiki to build his deck. Seriously, he runs Negate Attack.

.................

So Jaden decides to Summon E-Hero Avian, and, as uaual, throws his face-down. So now his copy of Negate Attack is lost to the ocean. Hurray.

So we get to Cyrus' turn, and to our surprise, heres his opening hand-

[spoiler=no, its not a photo]

Cyrus' opening hand:

Steamroid

Drillroid

Submarineroid

Limiter Removal

Shield Crush

And he just drew Gyroid.

 

Cyrus decides to Summon Gyroid in attack position, and attacks Avian.

Avian dies, as hs ATK is the same to the once-per-turn-Marshmallon-Gyroid

Gyroid

.....Gyroid.

...........

[spoiler=GYROID!]

 

Anyway, the turn comes to Jaden who Summons E-Hero Sparkman, which attacks Gyroid, Gyroid survives, and Cyrus takes 600.

(Cyrus@3400)

Cyrus is acting "weak" again, and wishes to end this now, before Jaden actually takes damage.

Jaden wants Cyrus to continue, as its a duel to "boost his confidence".

wut.

Anyway, Jaden set 1 card, and ends his turn.

Cyrus draws, plays Pot of Greed, and doesnt exlain the effect. Why? Because secretly hes a pro.

In fact, using Pot of Greed in general is pro(for those who dont get it, "pro" on YCM=bad).

But eh, GX was made back in 2000 or something, so Pot of Greed was legal at that time(I guess?

Anyway, Cyrus draws 2, his cards are Power Bond and Vehicroid Symmetrical Docking.

Cyrus is staring at Power Bond, and thinking that if he uses it now, his next fusion monster(jumbo drill) would have an ATK of 6000. Add to it, that giant drill would be going at high speed in Jaden's direction.

POWER BOND PL0X?!?!

Anyway, in the Dub, Cyrus has some bogus flashback. No, that doesnt exist here. Cyrus is too manly for that.

Cyrus wants to spare Jaden's life(ugh) and uses Vehicroid Symmetrical Docking to fuse his Steamroid, Drillroid, and Submarineroid, to Fusion Summon Super Vehicroid Jumbo Drill. And he has it attack Jaden's Sparkman, and Jaden takes 1400 damage. Gyroid then attacks Jaden, and he takes another 1000. (Jaden is@1600) Cyrus ends his turn.

The turn comes to Jaden, who reveals to us that his set card is Warrior Returning Alive. Wow, this rook tries to bluff our hero? What is this?

Anyway, Jaden lays Polymerization and combines Sparkman and Clayman, to summon Thunder Giant.

the skies all turn dark and stormy, thunder rages, and then Thunder Giant sort of "hovers" down to the field, in an epic manner, and then does this pose to show us how powerful he is.

I dont know why I gave that detail, but I always liked watching his animation. Our camera even manged to get a god snapshot-

[spoiler=of thunder giant]

 

Jaden then tells Cyrus that his monster can auto-kill any 1 monster on the feld when its summoned.

Cyrus then tells Jaden that Jumbo Dril is JUUUUUUUUUUUMMMMMMBOOOOOOO and that because he used Connection Zone, its immune to destruction from his monster.

Instead, he targets Gyroid.

DANG IT! NOW I NEED TO DIG ANOTHER ONE O THOSE UP! >:U

Jaden then plays some bogus card called "Hero Boost", which gives his monster an additional 700, and lets it attack twice.

Thunder Giant is now@3100.

He thinks hes about to win, when really Limiter Removal, Cyrus Limiter Removal, set Limiter Removal Limiter Removal.

CYRUS ACTIVATES HIS FACEDOWN!

JUMBO DRILL BECOMES EVEN MORE JUMBO! AND NOW ITS ATK IS 6000!

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Jaden complains that "Hey! This wasnt in the script!"

Jaden, that was 4Kids. This is different.

Jumbo Drill's engine explodes with rage, and causes Cyrus' monster to literaly take off(its somewhat floating) in Thunder Giant's direction.

Thunder Giant's parts/guts/blood go flying all over the place in a sort of spinning motion, and the jumbo drill just tore through this sitting duck.

Cyrus runs off, as he knows doing so will also call the duel off, to save his "friend".

Later on, back at the Slifer dorm, Cyrus explains that his monster would have literaly killed Jaden, and that he doesnt want to get another warning from the cops for using deadly monsters outside of an official duel.

Also, main charactors cant be killed this easily, and not this quick.

This episode somewhat needs to end here, as the next episode features Zane.

Fun-Fact: ANY duel with Zane is treated as "official".

Since Zane is in Stage 4, the "Advanced Blue" level, they force you to always have official duels, as its a way of keeping your high-score.

 

[spoiler=Episode 8 - We finally get to see Zane doing stuff]

So with this episode, we start off with a view of DA from a distance, and we have our "camera" zoom into the building. We see some sliding doors open, and our hero-wanabee is the first charactor we see of the day. So we see Jaden walking down a hallway, he has a "flashback" about some crap that Alexis said about how Cyrus' brother is the most awesome duelist on this whole island. Later on, we find Jaden at teh card shop(it gives you free cards, yet, its deserted. wut?), and Crowler decides to go SNOOOPING AS USUAL we see, and he noticed that Jaden is writing a death sentanceduel request form. Wait, so on DA, we can fill out a form to force any random duelist, agenst there will, to have a duel with who-ever spent about 5 seconds filling out this piece of paper? With this sort of logic, why dont Slifers duel agenst Obelisks who have crap-tastic decks? Seriously, some of the Obelisks on this island run typical 60-card theme-less decks.

On-Topic: I like how Crowler thinks Jaden is "joking" about dueling with Zane, when he should be happy that Jaden would be easily defeated. Crowler, your "plans" are so unorthadox, its scary. Anyway, Jaden tells Crowler that he wants to die in a firery deathduel Zane in order to help Cyrus with some confidence gimmic. If we all know the events from last episode, Cyrus is obveiously better then Jaden. Again, Crowler disapproves of Jaden losing to Zane via a paper note. Wut.

Crowler tears up the paper, and has the most brilliant laugh as he does it. Its priceless.

So later that day(zomg were keeping track of time), we have our "camera" focus a bit on the red dorm. anyway, Cyrus is all concerned that Jaden will end up losing the duel for both of them. He has this "day dream" about the future duel, and I like how Trisian, yes, Tristian, is one of there opponents.

[spoiler=Really, im not joking]

 

And I like how Tristian comments that Cyrus did a "weak" move by just using Patroid, and he uses "a spell card" to take control of Patroid, when then attacks Jaden.

[spoiler=AND JADEN GETS OWNED BY PATROID!]

 

-INSTANT REPLAY!-

[spoiler=AND JADEN GETS OWNED BY PATROID!]

 

Cyrus is concerned, because Jaden just drew a card and ended his turn. and brain control shenanigans like that is so common now-a-days, its not even funny.

Later on, Jaden is walking through the forest for some unown reason, but my guess is that he wants to pester Chumley.

-WHEN DOES ZANE APPEAR ALREADY!?!?!?!?

....

Cumly is up in a tree, it adds to the "hes a koala" gag.

Jaden's "zomg teh formz had to be filled out in 402 copies and with a number#1337 pencil"

CROWLER, JUST LET JADEN DIE. THAT DUEL REQUEST FORM ALSO UN-BINDS CHARACTORS FROM THIS SHOW, AND LETS THEM BE KILLED FOR SERIOUS.

..............

[spoiler=Chumley thinks hes Spiderpig]

SPIDER CHUMLEY

SPIDER CHUMLEY

DOES WHAT EVER A SPIDER CHUMLEY DOES

CAN HE SWING, FROM A WEB

NO HE CANT, HES CHUMLEY

LOOK OUT!

HERE COMES A SPIDER CHUMLEY!

 

Ok, you know what, the rest of this is just some crap about Cyrus trying to escape Jurrasic ParkDA, because him and Zane cause too much awesome to be in the same area.

Oh, and our "Camera" got some amazing shots of this sunset-

[spoiler=under a bridge]

 

[spoiler=same bridge + lense flare + zane]

 

DANG IT MAN! EVEN SCREEN-TIME WITH ZANE BECAOMES EPIC.

Alrght, so Zane notices that Cyrus, Jaden, and Chumley are trying to practice under-water-basket-twister-Halo-64. Thing is, I'm just lazy, and want to see Jaden lose already.

Finally, its night time. Why? Because Cyber Dragon appearently looks cooler at night.

[spoiler=And because the light house is also voting for Zane]

 

Alright, ima cut it here so we can use another episode to record this whole epic game.

 

[spoiler=Episode 8.5 - Zane is serious cat.]

Read part 8, so you know whats going on.

Zane vs Jaden, in a duel to encourage Cyrus to not worry about Jaden, in the upcomming

 

tag-team duel.

Jaden has the frist move, so he obveiously is relying on the Avian that he topdecked.

Lol@using Avian agenst the top ranked duelist.

Jaden, as the usual idiot he is, throws more of cards all over the place.

Zane, you dont even need to try, Avian is defenceless.

Zane starts off with Cyber Dragon

Scratch that, Zane always starts with Cyber Dragon.

[spoiler=srsly...]

^I like this image for some reason^

 

Jaden is all like: "OMFG UR CHEETIN!!1"

Duah, but hes Zane, our only level 4 duelist. He also gets a bonus of being able to play level 5s without any tributes.

Zane announces his attack with Cyber Dragon.

STRIDENT BLAST TO E5!

CRITICAL HIT!

SUPER EFFECTIVE!

And I think it sunk Jaden's battle ship.

Jaden's Lifepoints@2900.

Next, Zane uses a card called 'Future Crab Helmet/Salty'

Wait, what?

Anyway, this card has the same effect as Different Dimension CapsuleGold Sarcophagus.

Zane gets to chose a card from his deck, and remove it from play face-up

[spoiler=apearently his deck does it for him]

LOOK CLOSLEY AT CYBER DRAGON, PEOPLE, ITS AN ANIMATION ERROR OF HIS EYE AND TONGUE BEING SILVER.

 

Even though its removed face-up, Jaden cant possibly tell what it is, since both duelists are about 8-12 feet from eachother.

Jaden comments that its probobly the strongest card in his deck.

PSSSST, READER, THAT CARD IS SHAPESNATCHPOWER BOND.

Zane ends his turn there.

Jaden comments that he might be 9001 times better then people say he is, but Jaden brags that his skill is a level of 9002. Wow, just wow.

Jaden topdecks Polymerization, fusing his Sparkman and Clayman, to Fusion Summon Thunder Giant.

Sadly, Thunder Giant doesnt get his epic animation from episode 7, as were using all our animation on Zane's cards. What? They are more awesome.

Jaden uses Thunder Giant's anime effect to destroy Cyber Dragon, and then declares a direct attack on Zane.

Thunder Giant used Boltic Thunder

Zane takes 2400 damage(Zane@1600)

Not very effective.

Jaden comments that Zane should act more like an anime character, and "flinch" apon being hit by a hologram.

Jaden actually sets a face-down for once, instead of throwing it.

Now that its Zane's turn, he comments that Jaden has the luck of your typical Wc07,08,09,10 wifi noob.

Yea, I know, its annoying.

BUT ZANE STILL RUNS 3 COPIES OF CYBER DRAGON, THUS, HE CAN SUMMON ANOTHER ONE FROM HIS HAND.

Zane acts like Phoenix Wright for 5 seconds-

[spoiler=as he plays Monster Reborn]

 

Zane then plays a copy of Polymerization, thus, he Summons Cyber Twin Dragon.

HEY JADEN, DID YOU GET THAT!? HIS MONSTER HAS MORE ATK THEN THUNDER GIANT AND CAN ATTACK TWICE!

.........

Zane declares an attack with Cyber Twin

[spoiler=like so]

 

Cyber Twin used Double Strident Blast!

CRITICAL HIT!

CUPER EFFECTIVE!

*Clayman gets destroyed*

Jaden used Hero Emerges

GO WOTWILTRUETRGE(how ever you spell that cards name)

*Wot-dog was destroyed*

Hit 2 times!

Jaden is currently@2500

Jaden's Wot-Dog's effect lets him add a Polymerization and Clayman from his Graveyard to his hand.

Now that its Jaden's turn, he Summons anime batmanBubbleman, which lets him draw 2 cards from his stacked deck.

He draws Transendent Wings + Winged Kuriboh.

Jaden then uses Polymerization to fuse batmanBubbleman with Clayman to Summon Mudballman, in defence, which has 3K Defence. Chumley makes a comment on how 3K defence means its "invincible". lolChumley

Cyrus comments that Jaden's "attempts" might luck-sack the victory.

Cyrus, really.. a 3000 defence monster agenst a 2800 double attacker. Zane could just play Machine Conversion Factory and still win >__>

Jaden ends his turn there, and taunts Zane by saying "Go ahead, I DARE you to double attack Mudball man and take 400 damage"

..........

The turn zomes to Zane, K?

He gets to add that ShapesnatchPower bond from his deck to his hand via the effect of 'Future Crab/Salty'

Zane comments that Jaden's resistence was futile, and that hes about to unleash an awesome force of mass destruction on this game.

Zane right away plays De-fusiontells his Twin Dragon to use Baton Pass, which lets him return his Double Dragon to send out his 2 Cyber Dragons.

Zane then selects 'Bag' and uses the item called 'Power Bond'

[spoiler=its so awesome]

 

This lets him Warp-Digivolve his Cyber Dragon by knocking out his other 2 Cyber Dragons.

What? Cyber Dragon is Evolving?

[spoiler=do]

 

[spoiler=not]

 

[spoiler=press]

 

[spoiler=B]

 

(even if you try to, secretly, there no B button)

CONGRATULATIONS! YOUR CYBER DRAGON EVOLVED TO-

[spoiler=CYBER END DRAGON!]

 

Zane then reminds us that his item causes his Pokemon to enter rage mode

[spoiler=AND ITS SURGING WITH UNSTOPABLE AWESOMENESS]

 

Chumley makes a comment-

[spoiler=that its ATK is 8000]

 

[spoiler=Yes Chumley, 8000]

THERES NO WAY THAT CAN BE RIGHT!

 

Oh, and since Jaden's field only has Mudball on it, Chumley comments that if his survives the different of 8000 and 3000(about 5000, when Jaden is current@like 2000), Jaden can still the duel.

Jaden, theres no hope for you.

[spoiler=Zane declares an attack with Cyber End]

 

Cyber end Dragon used Super Strident Blaze!

[spoiler=ITS A ONE HIT K-O!]

 

Jaden takes well over 2500 damage, and loses. Hurray.

After, Cyrus walks over to Jaden and says "you did the best you could, right?"

Zane walks off, Alexis follows him. Zane comments(hes talking to Alexis) that Jaden could maybe luck-sack the tag-duel, and miraculously stand a chance.

*is cutting the episode here*

 

[spoiler=Episode 9 - This episode sucks]

Chumley's dad arrives at jurrasic parkDA with a boat full of 'Sake'

.......

Guys, do we really need an episode 9? I mean all this episode is, is just some crap about how Chumley's dad wants Chumley back home, as hes still a Slifer, yada-yada-yada, they duel, Chumley's dad wins, blah-blah-bah, Chumley's dad goes back home since he figures Chumley has "good friends" here. Seriously, its just a filler episode, and we would rather see Jaden lose again.

Really, we dont need this episode.

Chumley's Dad: "The 'Sake' that my company distributes contains 195% alcohol"

Me: "Really?"

Chumley's Dad: "How els do you think I made all this money?"

....................

Basicly we all got drunk and called it a day.

 

-----

Episodes from 11 - 17

[Mutant Monster RAEG-HAPYP]

Arm you are now my best friend

[Toffee.]

THIS POST NOW HOLDS MOAR EPISODES

Mostly because the OP is "to full" of text

 

[spoiler=YUGIMONZ EPIK TAG - Episode 10/1: I did this for teh lulz]

LOOLOOLOOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLNOITDOESNT

This episode starts off right, we skip the crap and go straight to the duel.

We have our "camera" pan down from the sky to DA(DAI), and were welcomed to a shot of Crowler's feet. Why? Because hes seriously walking down a serious hallway, seriously looking serious. Crowler, as usual, has his "happy" face on, and for liek 5 seconds, he reveals that hes voiced by the same guy who does Goku. WATCH FROM 0:16 TO 0:20. ITS SO FUNNY.

He even does a generic Goku poze, as if his power level is over- owait, we already did that.

........

...............

9000!!

<3

....

Anyway, e see some background students escaping the elevator, as its clearly the best spot to avoid Crowler's "HULK SMASH!" moment.

Sadly, we didnt record that.

So Crowler makes a comment that Jaden is doomed. hopelessly doomed.

but hes paired with someone who runs GaoGaiGar

And one of our main Chazz charactors walks up to Crowler, and suggests we switch Jaden with himself.

DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME IT WOULD BE TO SEE VWXYZ ULTRAZRD AND GAOGAIGAR IN THE SAME EPISODE!?!?!?!?!?

But sadly, we need Jaden in this episode, as we can use him for the "humor" aspect of this show.

Seriously, if I were writing this, which I am, I would have it Chazz and Cyrus vs the paradox guys. lol, I ruined the surprise of it being the Paradox "bros" as there opponents.

PARA IS THE DUDE IN THE ORANGE

DOX IS THE GUY IN THE GREEN

FRENZY IS RED

RUMBLE IS BLUE

BLACK IS LEFT

WHITE IS UP

LEFT EAR ON ORANGE

.........

Now where was I? O ya datz rite.

Anyway, Crowler tells Chazz that Para&dox, no, not 2 copies of Paradox, that movie is confusing enough as it is.

Later, we see Jaden and Cyrus "stacking" there decks@teh Red dorm before the upcomming duel. Its perfectly legitamit, as Para & Dox already have done so.

Chumley comments that both of them are calm.

Jaden is calm because hes the comic-relief, Cyrus is the Hero, and both of them are powered by the creator of this fic. What can possibly go wrong(to Cyrus)?

They also discussing Power Bond. The oh-so awesome card that wins games.

CYRUS KNOWS HOW TO PLAY IT, JADEN, QUIT EATING ALL THE FRIGGIN' JaAM!

Anyway, we know can get on with the duel. For reals this time.

And I like how they have to announce to the audince, who clearly isnt listning, that its a "sudden expulsion match".

Wait, why isnt it a duel? Matches take 2-3 games, so that gives them plenty of time side-deck and what/not t easly counter what Para+Dox are using.

....Jaden comments that this area has "acustiks"(w/e). Its a freakin' dome, what do you expect?

Oh, and Chazz complains that it should be a 2 on 1, Jaden+Cyrus vs him.

Chazz would win, no doubt.

Though GaoGaiGar would basicly be enough to win, Chazz can just pay Cyrus a bunch of money to "lose" on purpose. Really, Chazz is basicly another Kaiba is this dimension.

Oh, and "Camera" pans up on Zane real slow like. Because hes awesome, and hes another main charactor.

YAY! 3 MAINS IN 1 EISODE! =D

Anyway, Crowler introduces our Tag team of Non-Chazz(jaden) and Cyrus, and there opponents, Para and Dox.

Jaden, while watching there intro is like: "OMFGWTFIZTHIS!!!1!1"

Jaden, this whole episode is a 3 ring circus, and I R teh ring master

Jaden: "lolyc-"

SHUT IT.

Oh, and for the record, Para & Dox will have little to no actual lines in this.

Because I dont want to have to come up with a bonch of bogus(they already released it) lines that can rhyme with eachother.

But we did record there first/last words in ths, as the fail to rhyme

Para: "Salutations you fools"

Dox: "I hope your ready to duel"

Fools and Duel rhymes. Yep. Perfect sence.

inb4theyarenotsymetrical

Anyway, Jaden and Cyrus comment that they have no idea who these guys are.

Crowler reminds us, the audence, and the reader of this fic, that Para and Dox are "legendary" for the fact how they epic-failed to Yugi+Joey. THE DOOR ON THE LEFT IS THE LIE!!

Also, I dont get this. Crowler says they havent dueled in ages, but know all the current up-to-game rules/banlists/and what-not. Wut.

Alexis comments they are "dueling mercenaries".

I didnt know you could get a job as a mercenary who plays children's card games.

HEY DADDY, GUESS WHAT I WANNA BE WHEN I GROW UP!

Chazz, with his toast obsession, reminds Chumley that Toast-Jaden and Toast-Cyrus are both Toast.

Mmmm..... Toast... with JaAm on it......

And of course, this whole thing is on Crowler to pay for the fines/injurys/lawsuits/and what-not.

Just close the spoiler now, and save yourself the trouble.

BUT NO, WE MUST CONTINUE!

Jaden comments that they cant even beat male pattern badlness, so how can they win?

[spoiler=Crowler's reaction to that line is priceless]

 

Crowler then reminds everyone that the duelists should prepare to BADDLE.

Crowler also "reinforces" some kind of "no sharing" rule.

But Crowler, I made JaAm sammichs for everyone D:

Anyway, he also tells us that we can use whatever is on our partners field.

so if this is anything like Battle City, we can use monsters at meat shields for eachother.

JADEN, USE YOUR AVIAN AS A SHIELD FOR CYRUS, K?

Anyway, Lets end this bogus here, and save the next spoiler for the whole duel.

Because its a "staple" to this fic.

 

[spoiler=Epik Tag, part 10/2 - The "Rigged" Gate guardian]

[insert events from last episode here]

Everyone is@8000.

Cyrus has the first move, and decides to open with Gyroid. Because opening with a monster that cant be destroyed by battle, once, in a tag-duel, is so pro. And ebcause he wants to give Jaden a chance at this game. Cyrus ends there.

Afk.

*10-20 minutes later*

Ok, I'm back from 7-11.

They had a flavor of Slurpee called Orange Float. Its actualy pretty good.

So anyway...

The turn comes to Para Dox ParaMr.Orange, who starts off by Summoning Jurai Goomo. GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMO. He ends his turn.

Jaden comments that its a big bug, and that "its nothing his deck cant squash", and Summons E-Hero Burstiatrix.

OH YES, BECAUSE WE ALL KNOW THAT 1200 IS MORE THEN 2200. and of course, its in defence mode.

Jaden ends his turn.

The Incredible Dox(hes wearing green, get it? lololol) is up next, and Summons Kaiser Seahorse in attack mode.

[spoiler=GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMO is still the biggest creature on the field]

 

Dox then decides to use Tribute Doll on Paras own monster.

Real fast-

[spoiler=look at this mugshot of Dox]

His face looks like it has "built-in" Kamina Glasses

 

So as I was saying, Dox uses Tribute Doll on Paras Juri GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMO to Special Summon-

[spoiler=A monster that looks just like him]

How nice, they play a pseudo-teamkilling style, in which it somehow benefits them. JUST LIKE TAG DUELS IN WC10 LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL.

>_>

<_<

Also, why the heck does Bastion comment on how "This is how tag duels should be"

Bastion is right, in this aspect, as Cyrus is the one doing all the work.

YES LINK, YOU GO AND DO ALL THE HARD WORK, WHILE I, GANNON, JUST SIT BACK AND GET ALL THE POINTS.

I know Turtle is probobly reading that, and laughing the whole time, because I did that on purpose.

So next, the ever-so Incredible Dox, who is indeed incredible, plays Dark Designator.

Now although it says your opponent is the one who is effective by this, appearently in tag duels all of the players are treated as both teams and enemies at the same time.

........

TWO-PRONGED ATTACK IS A +2!!!

[trollface.jpg]

But anyway, Para adds Sanga of teh Thunder from his deck to his hand, because Para used Dark Designator on him and said some stuff that makes it work. And I find it funny, Sanga is the top-most card of his deck.

Really, watch from 9:22 to 9:28.

Also, I think Jaden is racist twords level 7 monsters, as he makes a comment saying "OMFG UR USIN MOAR LEVEL 7s!?!?!?"

Anyway, the turn comes to Jaden, who wants to list off everything the field has.

No, I'm not going to do that for you, as it would take up a lot of space.

EXCEPT THAT JADENS NOTICED THE LEVEL 7 MONSTER AGAIN.

Cyrus comments that we should just leave now, as Jaden is a tard.

Cyrus also says something about "serious dueling punch"

So its another flavor of Falcon Punch?

Fruit Punch -> Hawaian Punch -> Dueling Punch -> Falcon Punch -> FAEC PAWNCH!

.......

So since that its Cyrus turn, he Summons Steamroid

In this version, his turn works a little differently.

Cyrus declares a drect attack with Steamroid, and the Incredible Dox tells us that his monster can reduce its ATK to 0 for this damage step. Para takes no damage.

Cyrus then attacks directly with Gyroid, as Kazegen can only be used once.

SO TAKE THAT DOX!

-Para&Dox@7000

Main Phase 2, Cyrus uses Polymerization to Fusion Summon Steam Gyroid.

Why he did that, is beynd me. But I like seeing that thing animated. It looks cool :3

Crowler makes a comment that this wasnt in the script.

Crowler, that was your old job, this is your new job, an "actor" in a fanfic made some guy on YCM-Kun.

Cyrus comments that he might be overdoing it for Jaden, but Jaden actually encourages him to over-due it.

PLEASE CYRUS! OVERDUE IT!

Cyrus places a spell/trap face-down, and ends his turn.

Unlike Jaden, who throws his cards, Cyrus actually knows what hes doing.

So now the turn comes to Para, who uses Monster Reborn on, you guessed it-

JURI GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMO

Para then uses his copy of Tribute Doll on his JURI GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMO, which then lets Para tribute his monster to summon "another level 7 monster"

WHY DO YOU GUYS HATE LEVEL 7S SO MUCH!? ;-;

[spoiler=Anyway, he Summoned Suijin]

 

So then, he Tributes Dox' Kaiser Seahorse-

Dox, you dont need to remind us of what it does, Kaiba already exlained that.

[spoiler=He Summons Sanga of teh Thunder]

 

Para then declares that his ring provides Fire

Dox tells us that his ring provides Earth.

[spoiler=And by there powers combined with Wind, Water, and Heart]

 

[spoiler=I am..]

CAPTAIN PLANET!

 

Para declares an attack with there newly formed Captain Planet, which has an attack called "Elemental Mix-Up", and it ges like this:

water rises up, which gets 'shocked', and then streams of fire spin around the electrical water, water that also contains a bunch of rocks, and then wind blows it in the direction it needs to go. But dont worry, its powered by love.

It fires at Steam Gyroid, and the hero's Lifepoints drop to 6250.

.....Are we picking numbers at random, or what?

Anyway, Crowler is all trollface.jpg over how Jaden is terrible@this game.

Jaden comments that Para&Dox giant "koolaid man" can be "kicked in the tights", and then it will "go down" because "its very top heavy".

loldanecook

Para sets a face-down card, and ends his turn.

DUDE, DOX IS WIDE OPEN!

So the turn comes to Jaden then.

Yep, hes going to screw it up.

Jaden uses up his Normal Summon on Clayman, then plays Polymerization.

Yep, he screwed it up.

BUT GUESS WHAT GUYS, JADEN SUMMONED-

[spoiler=WC07S FAVORITE MONSTER!]

 

Also, he says "hes bad".

.....

............

(5:37 to 5:50)

And this is a first, its effect actually works, as Dox field is emty, so it fulfills the condition of its bogus ruling. Hurray?

Para&Dox@7000

So now The Incredble Dox plays Fairy Meteor Crush on Captain FireWaterElectricWindRockLovePlanet.

Seriously, all of this moves have ben incredible.

Dox explains that Planet can now use the power of the destroyed moon(lolgen1joke) to attack through defence.

Cyrus reveals his face-down, you know what, forget it. As we all know the anime punshes people for using meta cards.

Para then counters with Judgment of Anubis

DANG IT PARA, QUIT TROLLIN THE FIELD WITH UR CARDS!

It destroys the Male Rampart-Dude, and they take damage equal to its ATK.

Heros@4450

Dox then plays the monster with the most origional name evar, Defence Wall, and as usual-

[spoiler=its another Incredible Hulk-esque monster]

 

He reminds us that it also has the most origional effect ever, that draws all attacks to it.

Incredible.

Bastion in the crowed is like: "0MFG 4LL 0V D3R M0V35 l2 Fl_4Wl_355!"

Alexis replys back with a simple: "GTFO!"

Cyrus then Summons Cycroid, in defence-wall position, for teh lulz., and ends his turn.

Para, like the troll he is, draws and has Captain Planet attack Cycroid with his Watery-Fire-Rocks-of-Windy-Pikachu-Love!

Heros@1700

You know Para, your just trying get Cyrus(and me) to enter Rage mode, arent you.

I bet you and those other 8-year olds are just trying to prove that Gate Guardian is better then "Infernos" and other metagame shenanigans. Well you know what? This episode is where I draw the line.

The next episode, you guys are dead. No excuses, we do this MY way.

And every bit of it will be powered by boundeless courage!

(its a GaoGaiGar episode, yo)

((lolspoilers))

 

[With loving memory to Yugiohoverlord, who is quite possibly the best yugimonz player ever]

 

 

[spoiler=Episode#11 - Cyrus is really from the Green Planet]

ITS A GAOGAIGAR REFERENCE. SHUSH.

Alright, so our heros are currently "losing", but this is the episode in which the writer of this fic decides to "tweak" this part, and hopefully get the reader to laugh a bit.

So anyway, the announcer can stop trying to 'force' Jaden into doing his turn, when yet, hes doomd.

And as always, they have Captain Planet staring them down.

SMASHINGGROUNDFISSURELIGHTNINGVORTEXRAIGEKIBREAKTRIBUTETOTHEDOOMEDETC

Were skipping the 3-hour "dramatic tension" bit, but were pasuing with our "camera" to see Chazz and his evil Chazz-face, being all: "THERE LOSING!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!"

Yea, you would think.

Alright, so since its Jaden's turn, he Summons E-Hero Sparkman to the field.

And then proceeds to equip Sparkman with-

[spoiler=his electrical AK-47]

 

Jaden tells Sparkman to aim at Gate Guardian-

[spoiler=BOOM! HEADSHOT!]

 

Dox says that shot was incredible.

Para claims he was using an aimbot.

Para, really....

And as any other videogame boss goes, bosses trigger a "hit state" when you hit them in the correct spot.

[spoiler=Sort of like something from Megaman]

 

Anyway, Jaden, YET AGAIN, throws down more of his cards. Ugh.

Now its the Incredible Dox' turn. He draws, sets 1 spell/trap, and ends his turn.

So now thats it Cyrus' turn, we are "treated" to sme flashback of Jaden coming up with an oh-so brilliant combo of using Sparkman's AK-47 to force a monster to stand down, and then kill it with a Shield Crush.

Wut.

Really guys.

[spoiler=even Cyrus isnt amused]

 

Anyway, Cyrus draws and Normal Summons Drilroid.

I <3 the way it was summoned. The grounds sort of 'explodes', and then this giant drilling machine comes popping out of the ground. Its almost as epic as Tunnel Rhyno's intro(Megaman X3, yo).

Defence Wall is destroyed because Drillroid "broke it", and our Heros lose 500 Lifepoints because Drillroid is weird in the anime.

Also, Cyrus actually uses a monster-destruction card, but he reminds us that its a slower and semi-situational card, and thus, the fic wont "bust him" for using something meta-esque.

Though I'm pretty sure no one really ran Shield Crush to begin with >__>

Anyway, Para complans they are "cheating". Para, this is the fate of all strong boss monsters.

They die to things like this at some point.

AND GET THIS, JADEN USES HIS SAME JOKE FROM EARLIER, BUT SAYS IT LIKE THIS: "The bigger they fall, the harder they fall"

WATCH FROM 0:37 TO 0:41

Anyway, Cyrus sets 1 card face-down, and ends his turn.

So now that its Para's turn. God....

He topdecks a card called "Dark Element", which works when a Gate Guardian is in the Graveyard.

FOOLISHBURIALWOULDHAVEBENLIKEONEHUNDREDTIMESFASTER

Anyway, this lets him Summon another monster with a really origional name, Dark Guardian.

[spoiler=And wow, his intro is epic]

 

And Bastion comments that its invincible in battle and has an TK like that.

WHAT? 3800!? THERES NO WAY THAT CAN BE RIGHT!!!

But seriously guys, its just 3800.

Para declares an attack with his monster, saying its attack is called "Axe Slash Bash".

REALLY GUYS, THESE DOODZ R SO PRO @ COMMING UP WITH THESE NAMES.

[spoiler=Para even tries to show off his fail-attempt at a Falcon Punch]

 

BUT WAIT, WHATS THIS!? JADEN FIGURED OUT HOW TO ACTIVATE CARDS HE THREW ACROSS THE ARENA!?!?

Jaden's face-down is Hero Barrier, which negates the attack.

When really, Jaden was just trying to except his "death", when Cyrus actually figured out how to trigger that card. Cyrus also has a necklace with a green stone on it., and it had a glowing G on it. And he was making a "rock-on" hand when he was doing so......If you think about it, Cyrus was like Momaru just now.

SHOOOSH. ITS PART OF THE PLOT.

Now that its Jaden's turn, he plays Fusion Gate.

He then Fusion Summons E-Hero Tempest.

He THEN plays 1 card face-down, and then "sacrifices" that to make Tempest another Marshmallon.

Hurray, more invincible monsters.

DOX DECLARES THAT HIS LARGE BOOMING VOICE CAUSES OUR HERO TEAM TO HAVE 200 LIFEPOINTS FOR SOME REASON!!!!!1

BECAUSE TALKING IN CAPS LIKE THIS IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL!!!!!!11

LOLILIKESTOTALKINALLCAPSLIKEANIDIOT!!!!!1!11!111oneone

............

*cutting it here for dramatic emphasis*

 

[spoiler=Episode 11, Part B - How is this related to part A?]

READ PART 1 FIRST, THEN COME BACK TO THIS PART.

K?

In short, Cyrus wins the duel. But if you want to continue reading, and witness epic GaoGaiGar-ness, then be my guest.

So since its Cyrus turn, he draws. He has a "short" flashback abot how Zane reminds him that hes Earth's only hope, as trolls and incredible people, and Jaden, tend to make for a non-awesome fic.

But really, this fic IS awesome.

Next, Cyrus reveals his face-down card, which is Chain Material.

Fun-Fact: This anime version has no draw-backs.

He then sends his Drillroid to the Graveyard, along with the Stealthroid in his hand, and the Expressroid and Truckroid in his deck.

This then lets him Fusion Summon the true god of destruction, and the ultimiate shape of courage. And its name is-

[spoiler=Super Vehicroid - Stealth Union]

 

Cyrus then says as long as its on the field, he can Special Summons a Galleonrid from his deck to the field.

Galleonroid is also treated as a Beast-Type, thus, can "union" with Stealth Union.

Just then, Stealth Union somehow "transforms" into-

[spoiler=A SURPRISE 'ULTIMIATE MODE']

 

Dox says thats just incredible.

Para comments that this fic is out to get him.

I bet the reader of this is just laughing the whole time.

Anyway, Cyrus announces an attack of Genesic Stealth Union, and it rushes forward tword Dark Guardian.

Genesic fires a 'Broken Magnum'

(which is a flying jet punch, only it spins and does more damage)

Dark Guardian miraculously "dodged" it, and fights back by using his giant axe.

Cyrus says that Genesic has a move called Protector Shade, which takes the slash's "energy wave" and forms it in the shape of a star, and then fires it back at Dark Guardian with twice its ATK.

Dark Guardian takes a hit, but it then regenerates itself, as Para declares that his monster is immune to battle.

But Cyrus, who is still on the offence, has Gadgetroid(which is the tail of the giant mech) send out a Gadget Tool which turns Genesic Union's right hand into a giant knife. It slashes at Dark Guardian, completly cutting it in half, and you see a large explosion.

Though Para&Dox are losing Lifepoints from this, Dox says that there monster's incredible powers wont go down that easily. And instead, the destroyed parts of Dark Guardian then form into completly new Dark Guardians.

-GENESIC VS LIKE 500 DARK GUARDIANS-

All the Dark Guardians attack Genesic at once, which causes our Hero team to lose some Lifepoints, as well as see bits of Genesic start to "break off".

But cyrus says that they can still win this, as Genesic flies into the air, which then has Gadgetroid create another Gadget Tool, the Deviding Driver(which is then attached to the right arm of Stealth Union, in place of the knife), and then Genesic Stealth Union goes flying into the groud with the devider, and causes like every single Dark guardian to completly disappear.

PARA CLAIMS THAT 1 OF HIS GIANT TROLL MONSTERS SURVIVED, AND ITS GOING TO DEFEAT STEALTH UNION, SINCE THAT LAST ATTACK HORRIBLY WEAKENED IT.

Dark Guardian then charges full-speed at at Genesic with an amense force.

But Cyrus declares that Genesic is going to win this with 1 final attack.

Genesic's hands then become larger, and golden.

Jaden comments to cyrus that using that move can result in insta-death.

Cyrus doesnt care, as he knows the victor of this last collision is what decides the victor of this battle, and that heros give there all, regardless of the outcome.

Genesic puts its hands together, and then rushes forward at Dark Guardian.

Genesic, at this point, has a green aura to it, ast its burning with courage.

The giant mech then goes flying twords Dark Guardian, and its hands completly tear through the middle of Dark Guardian, and then Genesic pulls its hands back as it removed Guardian's 'Core'.

Para explains that it was the scource of its power, and that it can no longer be invincible.

With that, Guardian explodes in a massive fireball.

Genesic is left standing, and Para+Dox' lifepoints drop to 0.

Dox comments that this last scene was beyond incredible.

Later, Zane meets up with Cyrus, and comments that hes finally become a real man.

AND THEN JADEN POPS UP, TO RUIN THE MOMENT, AND SAYS DARK GUARDIAN FELL FASTER THEN A FALLING GIANT WARRIOR-SPIDER LOLOLOLOLOLOL.

...........

Jaden then gets round-house kicked to the face by Zane.

Zane then just simply says "Shut it." to Jaden.

*cutting it here, as we need to higre a repair crew to fix up this area, and we might need a few ambulances*

 

 

[spoiler=Episode 12 - THISWHOLEEPISODEISBECAUSEOFBASEBALL]

Thing is, I was lazy to finsih this episode at first, becuase its a slow episode. Anyway...

This episode opens with an amazing view of the sun, and then has our "camera" scroll down to show that everyone, in an academe about Yugimonz, is playing Baseball.

........

Wut.

So anyway...

Cyrus tells Jaden to keep his eye on the impending doomball.

Jaden says that hes such a pro@this sport, and that he can easily send it flying.

WELL GOOD LUCK WITH THAT JADEN, AS WE ONLY HAVE 1 FREAKIN' BALL.

Jaden thinks he will hit the ball, and the ball will basicly hover in mid-air until the whole team(which is like 30+ people) gets a chance to lap the field at least 8 times.

And take a good guess at who comes up to "help".

No, its not Dox. Hes too incredible for this.

Instead, we see Bastion come running up.

Bastion is all like: "l_0-l_ l\l00l35, l\/l41 l_337 5l<1l_l_5 (4l\l 0i/\il\l 7l-l353 l\l00l35!"

.....I'm not sure we got that, but sure.

So Bastion is up to pitch agenst Jaden. BASTION, YOU DONT EVEN NEED TO TRY.

Jaden makes a comment that Bastion has no idea what hes doing here.

Jaden, like your any better >__>

Jaden: "YA BUT I KAN UZE TEH BAT 2 HIT A HOMER-RUN LOLOLOLYOUTUBECOPYPASTA!1!!!1"

>_>

<_<

Bastion then explains that with his l_337 5l

Bastion pitches, and appearently-

[spoiler=he throws 4 balls and a roaring Tiger@Jaden]

 

[spoiler=Seriously, I'm not making this up, Bastion cheats]

 

So now that Jaden is up to bat, he has the oh-so "brilliant" idea to give everyone a free base, just to pitch for Bastion.

JADEN, YOU DO REALIZE THEY ONLY NEED 1 POINT TO BEAT YOUR TEAM.

...........

Cyrus calls for few seconds before we continue, to ask jaden why he wants to be such an idiot.

Jaden says that if he beats Bastion he unlocks an achievemtn for beating a Ra at Baseball.

Ok look, I used that joke before, but its still pretty lulz.

So as Bastion is putting his helmet on, as its his turn to bat-

[spoiler=HE LOOKS LIKE JIM FOR 5 SECONDS]

 

GET OUT OF THERE JADEN! YOU CANT WIN THIS WAY!

But appearently we wanted Crowler to die, as he be trollin around the field, and the ball "just-so-happens" to get a headshot on Crowler.

[spoiler=srsly]

 

So Basties to apologyze that he was the one batting.

Crowler says that he doesnt need to, as its a way for him to get some money out of this "show", as he can sue for injuries.

......

And he says that Bastion should "team up" with Crowler, as he wants to start some crap with the other students.

Later on, Chazz is in "his spot" at the teaching part of jurassic parkDA, and some of the students are like: "GTFO"

Chazz is like: "Wait, what?"

And they reply with: "YA, WE DUN NEEDZ U HEER"

Crowler walks up and yells@Chazz that hes far too epic to be@DA, and that he should go farm for EXP@other higher-levelev remote islands that specialize in children's card games.

Chazz complains that there are none, and that the noobs here are perfect for farming.

Crowler says that if he wants to stay, he needs to go 'own' Bastion@Card games

Chazz 'takes' off running to go hunt down his target.

[spoiler=All teh students are liek]

 

Later, at the Yellow dorm, Bastion explains that hes such a pro@this game, that he wrote a bunch of cheat codes his bat that would let him target people, instead of the game.

Wow, just wow.

Laster, in Bastions room, he then explains that hes figured out how to 'h4x t3h g4me', as he figured out an exploit that causes people to become relaly fat. Wut.

Bastion then exlains that we need to erase these from his walls, as it then prints them all over google so that people can easily get them.

Lol?

Later, at the Ra's kiten area. THEY SURVE YOU LOBSTER IN RA!? LIEK WUT DE HECK!?!?!

And Bastion explains that Crowler came up with this gimmic that puts Bastion in Obelisk.

Later, in Chazz' room, hes watching some video of his brothers who are saying that DA isnt worth the effort, as there are better opponents out there.

But Chazz, these guys are stupid-easy to beat, give a lot of DP when defeated, AND THE STORE EVEN GIVES YOU FREE CARDS.

So Chazz is SnooooPING AS usua, and sees that Bastion, Chazz, and Cyrus are heading to the Slifer dorm for the night. Sure.

Later, Dorth informs us that she was unloading some drugs"goods", and she spotted some cards in the water.

So they analize the situation, and they come to the conclusion that someone wanted to teach his cards how to swim.

Bastion just laughs, as he knows who was behind it, and knows he has a giant target on his back.

So at the duel arena, finally we get there, Jadens appearently figures out that Chazz was the one who "throw down his cards". I dont know either.

Chazz explains that Bastions deck was above 40 cards, and the whole thing was basicly a random stack of cards.

[spoiler=seriously guys]

 

So Bastion explains that actually WAS just a random stack, and that he has ben needing to re-make it.

He then reveals to us that he has 6 other decks, under his jacket.

Chazz says his deck is better then Bastions, but Bastion doesnt really care.

Anyway, they agree to duel eachother.

Chazz starts by Summoning Red Dragon Zord in attack mode, sets 1 face-down card, and eds his turn.

Bastion opens by Summoning Hydrogeddon in attack mode, and declares an attack of his monster.

Chazz takes 100 damage, and Bastion gets another Hydrogeddon, which then attacks directly.

Chazz@2300

Bastion ends his turn.

During Bastions end phase, Chazz activates his face-down, which is a card called Sentai Zone. What it does, is that it lets him revive his Red Dragon Zord, and then add a Yellow Tank Zord from his deck to his hand. So now that its Chazz' turn, he Normal Summons Blue Cannon Zord, and proceeds to activate Frontline Base, which lets him Summon another Union monster from his hand. In this case, its Yellow Tank Zord.

He then tells Bastion that he can combine his Zords together, to create-

[spoiler=XYZ Megazord]

 

Chazz then uses its efect to discard 1 card from his hand to destroy Bastions Hydrogeddon, and then Chazz attacks the 2nd Hydrogeddon with his XYZ Megazord.

Bastion@2800

Chazz ends his turn.

Bastion draws, Summons Oxygeddon in defence, and sets 2 face-down. His turn ends.

Now thats its Chazz turn, he uses the effect of XYZ to discard 2 cards to destroy Bastions 2 face-downs. Bastion chains 1 of them, which is a card called Water Stream, and it lets him destroy his own Dinosaur-Type monster to draw 2 cards. It also costs him 500 to activate it.

Bastion@2300

Bastion then uses his 2nd face-down, which is a card called Zero Barrier.

If its the only card he controls, Chazz cant declare an attack this turn, and he draws 1 card for each monster Chazz controls. Bastion draws 1.

Chazz complains that it was such a bogus move.

But who cares, we already released it.

Chazz then says that the card he used earlier, Sentai Zone, has another effect where you can send it to the Graveyard and Special Summon a Zord from your Graveyard. so he revives White Tiger Zord, and then Normal Summons Black Stealth-Bomber Zord, and has them merge together to get VW Megazord.

He THEN has those 2 merge together to get-

[spoiler=VWXYZ Ultrazord]

 

Chazz is moving in for the kill, and sets 1 card face-down.

The turn comes to Bastion, who right away plays a card called Dinosaus Logic. Which goes like this: If you were to use a card tha teffects Dinosuar types you control, you can remove them from play in your Graveyard instead. Its a weird version of Chain Material. He then uses Bonding H20 which lets him "Fusion Summon" Water Dragon.

Bastion then plays a card called Water Rush, and it lets him reduce the ATK of Bastions Ultrazord by 1000.

Bastion declares an attack with Water Dragon, But Chazz thinks otherwise. He flips his face-down card, which is Beckoning Light.

Chazz discards his 3 cards, and adds 3 LIGHT monsters from his Graveyard to his hand.

[spoiler=TAKE A GOOD GUESS WHAT THOSE 3 ARE]

 

By this point, it seems really obveious who won just now, as Ultrazord's ATK becomes 10,400.

Crowler explains that even if Chazz wins, he doesnt get EXP from this battle.

Chazz is mad about this, as Ultrazord completly blows Bastion to kingdom come.

Crowler explains that this was an unofficial match, and that Chazz will lose all of his exp because he battles with people who runs suckish cards.

Chazz runs off, as he knows that Crowler is being a weird stalker, and is out to get him.

DONT WORRY AUDIENCE, CHAZZ WILL RETURN AT SOME POINT!!

Just, he needs to rethink his approach to jurassic parkDA.

The ending was rushed, and it sucks. But to be honest, this episode is just slow >__>

 

[spoiler=I'm doing episode 14, because it features Jinzo]

Episode 13 sucks.

DIALGA ANd RAEG, I hope your reading this.

I'm eating mini bread sticks, which are pizza flavored, while I write this junk.

This episode basicly starts with some random Obelisk 'fellow'

....Sure

Random Obelisk X is running in terror because the pedobearJinzo is stalking him.

That joke makes sence either way.

And appearently its half-snowing, whith a red-ish glow over the horizon.

[spoiler=It looks amazing]

 

Jaden is losing agenst Cyrus in some duel which we used as filler, but the audience doesnt care.

LASERHANDSMAN

LASERHANDSMAN

LASERHANDSMAN

DERP

CRABHELMET

Regardless, I dont think Crab Helmet is going to review this episode.

Anyway... Appearnelty at the Slifer dorm, the students+teacher+cat are eating some fish/bread/marshmallow/I-dont-know sort of food.

On with the episode!

Random Obelisk X comes crashing through the wall.

No, hes not a talking bowl of punch

No, he didnt yell "Oh Yea!"

No, you cant kick him in the tights because hes topheavy

Dane Cook is so lulz

........

So Random Obelisk X manges to weak up, and inform us of the plot that we forgot to tell you about.

Appearently Random Obelisks X, Y, and Z were preforming ritural A, using device B to summon bad-guy C, which would then result in event H, which leads to event I, and finally event J.

Confusing, right? But I'm not going to spoil any of that, as I can make fun of it in some tardy manner.

......They used an O-Weegee board.

I know thats not how you spell Oijieiee(w/e), but spelling it that way makes it funnier if we use memes.

By this point your thining that both Pedobear and Weegee are out to get Obelisks X, Y, and Z.

Ehh, its close, but not exact.

I would photoshop Jinzo to look like Weegee, but it just wouldnt look right.

I mean as it is Jinzo is cosplaying as SkullMeramon from that time they invaded the real world.

[spoiler=srsly]

 

Wait, did I just put a digimon reference in there?

Thing is, I dont care. As SkullMeramon is basicly a demonic version of Skull Rider.

Really, its awesome.

MACHINEDRAMON IS THE MOST AWESOME DIGIMON EVER.

ITS A GIANT KILLING MACHINE THAT RESEMBLES GODZILLA AND HAS PROTON CANNONS.

Seriously....

Fun-Fact: Firefox ragequitted on us, so I need to boot up youtube aga- I mean... We need a new battery for the camera.

Look, I never memorized theses episodes exactly, I just now how most of them are/end up.

Also,

[spoiler=Jinzo fired a Coffee Beam at Random Obelisk X]

 

So later on, because we skipped some of this nonscenese, Jaden is now dueling none other then Darth VaderJinzo.

Expect puns relating to that.

Vader's opening move.

Yes, we re-named Jinzo to Vader.

Vader's opening move is Malice Doll of Demise, and he als activates Ectoplasmer.

Vader explains that he can sacrifice his monster to inflict Force Choke on Jaden, which also causes him 800 points of damage.

(Jaden@3200)

Vader ends there, because hes reckless. And manly. And seriously awesome.

Jaden notices his hand only has Avian in it. So he desicdes to just wing it.

.....No, I didnt intend that pun.

DONT QUESTION THIS FIC, ITS MESSED UP ENOUGH AS IT IS.

Jaden then decides to throw down the rest of his cards.

You know Jaden, you might have needed those.

Avian proceeds to Falcon Punch Vader, and he loses 1000 points.

Sparta.

Jaden also activates the effect of 'Rigged Draw Engine', which works where during Vader's turn, he can draw over nine thousaand 4 cards from his deck.

Now Jaden uses the effect of Force Choke to inflict 500 damage to Vader, at the cost of his only monster.

(Vader@2500)

Now that its Vader's turn, Malice Jedi of Demise.

[spoiler=I'm not kidding, the axe is actually glowing.]

 

So anyway, Malice Jedi now comes back, due to his effect.

And Jaden draws 4 because of his rigged card.

Vader then Summons Jedi Shinigami-Sama.

[spoiler=Thats right, Shinigami sama uses a lightsaber death-scyth.]

 

I'm sure Stein has something to do with this, but ehh...

At least Maka isnt throwing a book at Jaden.

So then Jaden uses his 'force' powers to activate 1 of the cards he threw, which is "Free Hero-realted card summon". This lets him Summon Sparkman and battle with Shinigami-Sama.

They both "die", but sparkman becomes a Kishin Souls.

Shinigami simply teleported back home.

Vader then reminds us of Shinigami's effect, and how it lets him add a Thousand Eyes Idol from his deck to his hand, as well as let Jaden add Burstinatrix from his deck to his hand.

THOUSAND EYES IDOL HAS OVER NINE THOUSAND EYES!

MORE MEMES!!!

Vader then proceeds to attack Jaden with Malice Jedi of Demise.

....Am I the only one who thinks that name sounds really awesome?

(Jaden@2400)

Also, Vader uses his Force Choke to deal 800 to Jaden, provided, he loses Malice Jedi.

(Jaden@1600)

Now that its Jaden's turn, he Summons Clayman in attack mode.

He then uses more of his force powers to activate the cards he threw earlier.

So Clay Wrap activates, and equips itself to Clayman.

He then activates Polymerization, from afar, and fuses Burstinatrix with Clayman to create 'E-Hero Wc07 Blaster'

Jaden then says Clay Wrap lets him destroy the Force Choke Spell card on Vader's side of the field.

Rampart then attacks directly.

(Vader@500)

Since Jaden ended his turn there, the turn moves to Vader.

Malice Jedi Apprentice comes back.

Vader then 'sacrifices' it to Summon himself.

Thats right, wild Vader appeared.

Jaden comments that he "cant summon himself"

Vader just laughs and says "I JUST DID!!!11"

Jaden, your pretty much doom-ed.

But wait, whats this?

[spoiler=Vader is also a Pokemon Trainer?]

 

Vader selects Bag

Vader moves over to the 'Ball' section

Vader picks Pokeball, and then selects 'Use'

Vader used a Pokeball.

3...

2.....

1....

Caught!

Give a Nickname to Wc07 Blaster?

Vader picks yes, and names it 'Rulings Fail'

This also costed Jaden 400 points of damage.

(Jaden@1200)

On Jaden's turn, he Summons Wotdog-thing(I can never remember how to spell it)

Chumly for some reason reminds us what it does, and Cyrus just comments that its a stupid play.

Cyrus, even though ive ben spelling your name wrong the whole time, your still better then like half the charactors who get screen-time on this fic.

Vader then Summons Spirit Caller in attack mode.

HURRAY FOR MORE REFERENCES TO OLDER GAMES.

Vader, who is appearently going through a Pokemon fetish, now throws a Pokeball at Jaden's dog-thing.

Its a level 5 Pokemon, its an easy catch.

Vader caught it and nick-named it 'Spelling Fail'

Spriti Caller attacks Jaden-

[spoiler=WITH A GIANT LAZOR]

 

(Jaden@200)

Vader then proceeds to equip himself with Amplifier, which lets him screw the rules and use trap cards.

Jaden turn now, who Summons E-Hero Batman-coslayer, AKA Bubbleman.

He then equips Bubbleman with Bubble Blaster, which gives him a giant proton cannon.

Jaden then destroys Spirit Caller with it.

ITS A TRAP!

VADER ACTIVATES FORCE BARRIER!

Now with this, Vader takes no damage, provided, he still stands on the field.

Jaden throws a face-down and ends his turn.

Vader throws a Pokeball at Bubbleman, catches it, and nick-names it Batman.

Vader sets a card and ends his turn.

During Jaden's turn, he does some crap to Summon Madballman and destroy Amplifier.

Vader goes back to his 'ghost' self as he 'died'.

Jaden then proceeds to attack Vader directly.

Vader: "But Jaden, you dont know the truth about your father!"

Jaden: "Ben told me you dueled my father, and beat him in a children's card game!"

-SPOILER-

Vader: "No Jaden, I am your father!"

Jaden: "THATS IMPOSSIBLE!!"

Vader: "Search your deck, you know it to be true!"

Jaden: "NNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! *overly-dramatic*"

God, this fic is such a mess.

Jaden 'fell' off the platform they were on, and went sliding down an escape hatch onto the Millennium Frisbee.

Yes, its a giant version of the Millennium Ring, except its a spaceship.

In the end, Vader won, as Jaden's oh-so brilliant move to fall/escape somehow counted as a forefit.

I dont get it either.

[spoiler=List of memes used in this episode, in no real order]

Pedobear

Laserhandsman

Crab Helmet

Derp

Weegee

Falcon Punch

Its a Trap

Vader+Luke's famous scene

Over nine thousand

Shoop Da Woop

Screw the rules

Fail-Blog

Millennium Frisbee

Shinigami-Sama

Maka-Chop

Soffee Beam/Godot

Sparta

 

 

[spoiler=Epiosde 16, Clobberin' Time]

This episode starts off when we see a large nuclear explosion appear out in the forest, and then some dude goes "flying" with his cards all over the place.

Kamina-Golem tells this victem: "Your cards are horrible, and I need to confiscate them"

[spoiler=Did I mention Kamina-Golem has Kamina glasses?]

 

Fun-Fact: Nickolodeon is paying for this episode. So we need to keep it "kid-friendly"

........

DUDE, KAMINA-GOLEM STABBED THIS GUY WITH A CHAINSAW, AND HIS GUTS WENT FLYING ALL OVER THE PLACE, AND ITS JUST A BIG BLOODY MESS!

I'm sure the 8-year-olds who watch this show are now scared for life.

Really, do we care? No.

.... I just noticed something about that above image I posted. Kamina-Golem has a lense flare from the moon.

Appearently hes just THAT epic.

Oh, and heres a screenshot of the guy he clobbered

[spoiler=duelist fail]

 

So back at DA, all the Obelisks are chatting about how some guy with Kamina Glasses keeps clobbering the fail-duelists, and stealing there cards/blazers.

Is this guy awesome or what?

Anyway, our "Team" of Heros:

Jaden is the Speed charactor

Chumly is Power

Cyrus is the Fly charactor

Yes, that was a Sonic Heros reference.

Charmy: ZOOM! ZOOM! ZOOM! ZOOM! ZOOM!

.......

*Espio throws a Kunai at Charmy*

*Tobi walks in and starts stealing stuff*

*Gannon hits Link because he wants link to all the hard work, and he just fnish everyone off*

*Link attacks gannon for said reason*

*Blue team loses*

*Red team wins!*

Bogus was already released to some crazy ammount. But its funny, and you know it.

...Yes, we can get back on topic now.

So Jaden/Cyrus/Chumly are walking, and the random Obelisk are like: "OMG ITS NOOBS!!!", and run off.

Wow, that was fast.

Cyrus, not Jaden, comments that the Obelisk are just as fail as the rest of the other background charactors.

Jaden just yells back: "UR MOM WAS OMG ITS NOOBS IN BED LAST NIGHT!!!1!1!!"

Can I stab Jaden now?

Please, can I?

Pretty please?

Pretty please with Jaden's blood all over the floor?

Seriously, lines like that are so steriotypical for your generic fail-noob in an online community.

/ANYWAY/.....

Chumly informs Jaden, as Cyrus already knows about Kamina-Golem, that somene who claims to be a "Kamina-Golem" is going around, yelling "Its clobberin time!", and owning people who suck.

Basicly hes a high-leveled PVP champion.

Thing is, hes only here because he wants Chazz to return.

Chazz, we all miss you.

Chumly also tells us, and the reader of this fic, that Kamina-Golem has this "Ante" ability with him, in which if he can clobber you, he also steals your best card and your jacket.

Jaden just says: "OMG REPORTED!!!1!1"

Cyrus slaps Jaden and says: "[WRONG!.jpg]"

Cyrus also tells Jaden that its a perfectly legitamit ability, as there are no real rules to this game, just as long as a children's card game gets plyed.

.....Does this mean we can do it Russian Roulete style?

>_>

<_<

Anyway, SURPRISE CROWLER!

Crowler is all: "Jaden mah boi! This Kamina-Golem is what all fail-duelist strive for!"

Jaden makes a comment saying that the fail-duelists are being targeted ON PURPOSE!?

Cyrus says that it forces them to get better at the game, and stop using decks that make you look bad.

Really, have you seen some of the non-Chazz, non-Zane Obelisk running around? They all run stupid crap like Reinforcements, Light of Intervention, and always stack Marauding Captain.

Really...

Crowler then asks Jaden if he wants to go looking for free EXP.

Jaden, like the tard he is, is all: "OMG FREE EXP!!!!!11!!1!1!one"

Crowler then says that if you stalk Kamina-Golem, you can get an achievement for it, which gives you +5,000 EXP, provided, you have to also defeat him.

Cyrus just walks off, knowing Jaden is doomed.

Chumley says it is possible to beat him, as he knows this guy IRL that beat him with a Shapesnatch deck.

*cough*Me*cough*

....I'm also the guy who gave Mr.Golem his Kamina glasses btw

So some time later, Jaden and his friends are SnooPING AS usual, and are watching some random Ra duelist battle an Obelisk who stacked a Marauding Captain.

Obelisk is @200

Ra@300

Observe, the fail-obelsks in there natural habitat, they pressure some guy in a lower dorm to make wrong moves.

Thing is, I'm only "stressed" with this episode, as it reflects how bad fail players are in online games, and how they are only as "good" as the words they can copy-pasta from google.

Ra-dude loses, as he decides to just attack with Mad Sword Beast, and of course, fail-obelisk uses his face-down card, Reinforcements.

And then as usual they continue to spam: "PWNED!", "OWNED!", AND "U FAIL!!11"

Really guys, its not rocket science to play a deck that badly.

Obelisk: "UR MOM ISNT ROCKET SCIEN-"

For that, Kamina-Golem is going to tear you apart.

I hope your happy.

Obelsik: "UR MOM IS HAPP-"

And hes going to steal your cards and jacekt.

Because he is better then me- *interupted*

Obelsik: "UR MOM IS BETTER THEN ME!"

...

I'm not even going to reply to that.

Bastion comes in to tell us that the random Ra-duelist has a "thing" for dueling in public, as it somehow "kills" his ability to duel.

The random Obelisks continue laughing at how Ra "fails".

Really, where did these guys come from? The same tard-mart where the other fail-players comefrom?

Later on, you know what, skip it.

The fail-duelists in Obelisk are just BEGGING to be killed by Kamina-Golem.

So later tonight, Jaden N' Friends are all looking for Kamina-Golem.

Jaden, it bad enough you lose to everything, but do you /REALLY/ want to waste Kamina-Golem's time? Hes busy killing-off the fail-players.

Jaden first off, runs into a defeated Obelsik who is all sad-like because Kamina-Golem took his "best card".

Serves you right, tard-face.

So Jaden is still wandering through the tall grass, and-

[spoiler=WILD KAMINA-GOLEM APPEARS!]

 

Jaden, good luck.

Jaden@4000

Kamina-Golem@4000

Kamina-Golem shouts out: "Its Clobberin Time!", and Summons Giant Ork in attack mode, and sets 1 face-down spell/trap.

Jaden draws Winged Kuriboh, who "tells" him to Summon him in attack position.

Jaden does so, and ends his turn.

Kamina-Golem draws, and proceeds to clobber Winged Kuriboh.

Jaden says: "noob, Kureebo lets me taek 0 damge"

Kamina-Golem says: "This isnt your GX crap, this is Arm's version of it, you tard!"

Winged Kuriboh asplodes from the awesomeness of Giant Orks ability to clobber things.

Jaden@2000

Jaden then says that Ork has to switch to defence, as its "forced" to.

Kamina-Goblin then equips Ork with Kamina Glasses, which gives Ork another 300 and keeps it in attack position.

Kamina-Golem sets another spell/trap and ends his turn.

Jaden, for his turn, plays Polymerization and fuses Burstinatwix with Clayman to Summon Wc07 Blaster. And with its "broken" effect, it attacks directly.

Kamina-Golem@3000

Jaden comments saying that he did damage to Kamina-Golem, and that his "costume" should come off now.

The Ra guy from earlier and some other guy named "Boureguard" go walking by and say "Hi jaden"

Jaden looks at Kamina-Golem again, noticing that it ISNT who he thought it was.

Jaden: "Oshi-"

Kamina-Golem then Summons Goblin King in attack mode, and Special Summon 2 Half Goblins(because he can), and then reveals 1 of his face-down cards, which is called: "Kamina-Buster"

Now, Goblin King is already@3000, and Kamina-Buster gives Goblin King another 5000ATK, and lets it do piercing damage.

[spoiler=for serious]

 

The now over-killing Goblin-Kamina clobbers Wc07 Blaster, and Jaden takes 5500 points of damage.

Jaden@0

Kamina-Golem walks off saying: "Not even worth it"

tl;dr - Jaden lost.

Hurray.

Also, Kamina-Goblin gets to continue kiling off all the fail-players.

Another hurray.

 

 

---------

[spoiler=Episode 17 - Tarzan is Dio Brando]

[*This episode is kinda' short-ish*]

GRAAAH! IT SANDVICH DAE! DAR BETR BE BOLOGNA!!!1

Jaden: "Its first come, first serve, heavy!"

Cyrus: "DUCK, JADEN!"

*Jaden ducks*

*Boolets go flying everwhere*

Heavy: "SASHA AND I R HUNGRY FOR SUM BOLOGNA!!"

*Heavy walks in, takes bologna sandvich, and leaves*

Wow, theres dead bodies all over the place.

Now if only Jaden DIDNT duck >__>

Regardless, who cares. The background charactors alwasy die in some crazy manner.

*Several hours later, after we cleaned up the bloody hallway*

Also, some crap about how we "Hint" at Jaden and Alexis' 'love interest'

Team Fortress 2 reference > This.

Anyway, Jaden, Alexis, and Cyrus are discussing the Golden Eggwitch, and they recall some time ago when a Golden Eggwitch was 'drawn' by someone named 'M.Bison'. They recall him taking a bite and shouting:

.

.......

Dorthy then walks up to our Chumly-less crew and informs us that someone has ben stealing all the rupeesGolden Eggwitches in HyruleDuel Academe recently.

So Jaden comes up with this "brilliant" idea to go camping by the Blu Team's Intelegence, as they are trying to stop that Spah from getting it. Guiyz, Sentreez wont help.

SENTRET

FURRET

NIDKING

BLASTOISE

AT LEAST ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTEY, OR MORE TO SEE!

TO BE A POKEMON MASTER IS MA', DESTINEEE!

........

...........

Sure.

So later that night, with Jaden, Alexis, Cyrus, and whos that?

[spoiler=ITS CHUMLEY!]

 

Anyway, Cyrus wonders what Alexis is doing over there on that computer.

Shes actualy on YCM, and writing this whole fanfic your read- owait

Actually, no, no she isnt.

No, you cant say the writer of this is Alexis, as she cant be writing this fic and on TV at the same time. It doesnt work that way.

Anyway, Dorthy comes in with some 'Stake-Out Snacks'

DUDE! THIS IS A FIRST! THEY ARE ACTUAL RICE-CAKES, AND ARENT DOUGHNUTS!

Though I wuld give 4Kids a +1 Internets, Dorthy still said they are "pastries", and are filled with chocolate, cherry, and/or lemon.

But hey, at least its "accurate", as Rice-Balls are usually filled with stuff anyway.

Later, when they decide to get serious and actually start SnooPING AS usual, AND TURN THE FREAKIN' LIGHTS OFF, our mysterious plot-device wants to pay us a visit!

So as soon as he appears, Jaden and his 'friends' are all like: "OMG STOP TAEKIN DA BLU TEAM'S INTELGENCE!

But as soon as they get the chance to 'stop' him-

[spoiler=HE DECIDES TO 'CHEAT']

 

On his way 'out', he rams the sammich cart through the metal door, and yells "Oh Yea!"

Its almost as if the Kool-Aid Man himself were doing this.

owait, thats right.

Anyway, Dio Brando is running like a madman as Jaden, Cyrus, Chumley, and Alexis are all following him.

He abandoned the cart, as he already eated the golden eggwitch.

Dorthy Informs us that its an upcoming boss battle with a "former student".

Yes, he used to be someone named Damon. No, not Matt Damon, the guy with the weird speach. This is some other Damon, another guy with weird-

DANG IT 4KIDS! STOP TRYING TO BE CLEVAR! >:U

.....I blame Family Guy. But ehh-

Actually, screw that last part. 4Kids has his name as Damon, in MY Fanfic, hes Dio Brando.

Jaden then, out of nowhere, wants to challange Dio Brando do a duel.

[bOSS BATTLE - DIO BRANDO'S ULTIMIATE MOVE]

Jaden@4000

Dio@4000

Jaden has the 1st move! Jaden starts off by playing E-Hero Avian in attack mode, and throws 1 card face-down.

A staple for this fan-fic, Jaden literaly throws his cards.

Jaden ends his turn.

Dio's turn, he set 1 card and proceeds to summon-

[spoiler=A GIANT STEAM ROLLER]

 

Now, Steamroller has a "gimmic", in which it causes its controler to return all the cards in said owner's hand to his/her deck.

Steamroller proceeds to run over Avian, in a dramatic WRRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY fashion.

Jaden@3000

Dio ends his turn.

Jaden's turn, he plays Polymer to Fusion Summon Wc07 Blaster.

He THEN uses its effect to attack directly via 1000 damage.

Dio@3000

Jaden ends his turn.

Before Dio's turn, he plays a card called 'Miraculous Top-deck'

He guesses what card is on the top of his deck. If hes right, Jaden takes 1000 damage.

Dio guesses that he will topdeck a card called "Card Bargin".

He guesses correctly, and Jaden takes 1000 damage.

Jaden@2000

He then proceeds to activate said card, and it's effect is as follows:

Dio Draws 1 card, but at the end of the turn that card is shuffled back into his deck.

He then draws 1, and plays it, which is a card called "Thief Control". This card works as follows:

Jaden draws 1 card, and Dio guesses is, and if its correct, all cards on Jaden's side of the field and in his hand are returned to his deck.

Jaden's field now contains 0 cards.

Dio then proceeds to use his ultimiate move

[spoiler=First off]

 

Now that time stopped, Dio throws a bunch of knives at Jaden.

Then he says some words about his attack, then time 'unfreezes'

Lastly-

[spoiler=The steamroller goes flying at Jaden]

 

Jaden takes 2000 damage.

Jaden@0

Dio wins, how obveious.

As we all know Jaden isnt as epis as someonme who can stop time and drop a steamroller on you.

The episode basicly ends with Dio getting away, and continusing his "rampage" of stealing more sammiches. Because appearently its funny.

 

 

[Headmaster Monokuma]

This is so awesome. I want more, and I want Avian torture again. It's quite sad, this is better then the show already. GOOD JOB!

[TheTurtleOnceCalledGod]

Genius.

[Toffee.]

This is so awesome. I want more' date=' and I want Avian torture again. It's quite sad, this is better then the show already. GOOD JOB!

[/quote']

Because there is no logic to it.

 

Genius.

<3

 

EDIT: Part 1 of episode 2 is up.

[Mutant Monster RAEG-HAPYP]

NIce job again :)

[Toffee.]

NIce job again :)

 

Episode 2 is now finished :3

[Headmaster Monokuma]

NIce job again :)

 

Episode 2 is now finished :3

 

YES. YES. YESS. Awesome, and maybe you should abuse Jaden more. He needs to be kicked around. Okay?

[Mutant Monster RAEG-HAPYP]

The fact that Jaden lost to ced made this more awesome

[Toffee.]

NIce job again :)

 

Episode 2 is now finished :3

 

YES. YES. YESS. Awesome' date=' and maybe you should abuse Jaden more. He needs to be kicked around. Okay?

[/quote']

.....Sure?

 

The fact that Jaden lost to ced made this more awesome

Chaos Emperor wins teh internet.

[Weather Report - Stand]

I strangely feel ripped off...

 

Shaking off the feeling, I like the style you're employing here.

[Toffee.]

I strangely feel ripped off...

Then that was an accident.

 

I like the style you're employing here.

To be honest, its a weird/awkward way of doing of fanfic, but also somehow works.

[Mutant Monster RAEG-HAPYP]

Where's Episode 4 D:

[Toffee.]

Where's Episode 4 D:

 

Episode 4, part 1 is up.

I'll get the rest of it up later, because its getting kinda' late where I am >__>

[RAEGING D0GKING]

Awesome :D

[Toffee.]

Episode 4 is done! =D

[Mutant Monster RAEG-HAPYP]

Keep up the good work

[Toffee.]

Wild Episode 7 appeared!

[Mutant Monster RAEG-HAPYP]

I <3 this fic

[Guest Supreme Gamesmaster]

I'm guessing line breaks is on the list of things you're not bothering with?

 

It's waaaay too fast-paced, and the horrendous formating doesn't help. Even utterly bizarre shows like Excel Saga and Pani Poni Dash know how to take it slow; this winds up more like the last segment of the Lucky Star OVA, where everyone turns into frogs somehow.

[Toffee.]

I'm guessing line breaks is on the list of things you're not bothering with?

Line breaks = latest part I added

 

It's waaaay too fast-paced' date=' and the horrendous formating doesn't help[/quote']

Thats on purpose.

 

Even utterly bizarre shows like Excel Saga and Pani Poni Dash know how to take it slow;

I admit I was lazy with the time aspect' date=' but when I usually say "so anyway", it means some bit of times has passed since the previous event.

 

this winds up more like the last segment of the Lucky Star OVA, where everyone turns into frogs somehow.

I do it for teh lulz

[Headmaster Monokuma]

Arm, by Jim you do mean the Crocodile Eye guy, right? That guy is awesome, and you better not kill him off. He made GX slightly interesting.

[Toffee.]

Arm' date=' by Jim you do mean the Crocodile Eye guy, right? That guy is awesome, and you better not kill him off. He made GX slightly interesting.

[/quote']

 

Yes, Jim is the same Jim Crocodile Cook.

Sadly, we have to wait until Season 2 for that.

 

But in the mean time, Zane finally appears.

[Headmaster Monokuma]

Arm' date=' by Jim you do mean the Crocodile Eye guy, right? That guy is awesome, and you better not kill him off. He made GX slightly interesting.

[/quote']

 

Yes, Jim is the same Jim Crocodile Cook.

Sadly, we have to wait until Season 2 for that.

 

But in the mean time, Zane finally appears.

 

 

Good. Zane will have to do in the meantime though.

 

Cut off right when Zane appears, of course.