Jump to content

The Truth About Vampires


Mehmani

Recommended Posts

The truth is they don't bite the neck (various), seduce women (Dracula), are immune to staking in cases (Buffy) or drink from the legs and have a crazy race of cousins (Darren Shan). The truth is that vampires sparkle.

 

Discuss opinions and how they can be oh so fun.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

"The Truth About Vampires" is that they don't exist.

 

And if they did, they wouldn't f***ing sparkle.

 

This.

 

If they did exist, we'd be in constant war for them.

 

They see us as prey and will try to domesticate us.

 

They'll breed the strongest ones with the strongest, while killing the smartest ones.

 

We won't stand for it and will try to completely wipe them out.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You people are so stupid. And Futbol is gay, it's called Football and us English invented the modern game. It involves kicking a round ball around, not prancing about in helmets.

How the F*ck Did a Vampire Topic Turn to a Futbol, or Football, or Whatever Topic? And I Don't Even LIKE Football(both) or Futbol or Whatever the Heck It Is, It's Just Two Sports with the Same Name. So Stop Trollin'

 

On Topic:

Twilight is Not The Truth, The Truth is They Don't Exist, but If They Did Here Would Be The Most Likely of Possibilitis(or As I See Them):

 

Vampires don't have fangs, they just have harder teeth

They Drink Blood from Anywhere on the Body of Any Mammal

They Blend in with Us, and Aviod Most Contact Until They Get Thirsty, or Something

They Have a Sophisticated Hierachy

They Don't Die in the Sun, They Just Sunburn Easily

They Can't Shape Shift

They Are Not Immortal, They Age Slower, and Live Longer

You Can Kill Them with Any Conventional Means(i.e. Grenade Launcher, Sniper Rifle, Chainsaw, etc.)

They Have Heightened Senses and Are Stronger, and More Agile

They Don't Sleep in Coffins

THEY DO NOT F*CKING SPARKLE!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

How the F*ck Did a Vampire Topic Turn to a Futbol, or Football, or Whatever Topic? And I Don't Even LIKE Football(both) or Futbol or Whatever the Heck It Is, It's Just Two Sports with the Same Name. So Stop Trollin'

 

On Topic:

Twilight is Not The Truth, The Truth is They Don't Exist, but If They Did Here Would Be The Most Likely of Possibilitis(or As I See Them):

 

Vampires don't have fangs, they just have harder teeth

They Drink Blood from Anywhere on the Body of Any Mammal

They Blend in with Us, and Aviod Most Contact Until They Get Thirsty, or Something

They Have a Sophisticated Hierachy

They Don't Die in the Sun, They Just Sunburn Easily

They Can't Shape Shift

They Are Not Immortal, They Age Slower, and Live Longer

You Can Kill Them with Any Conventional Means(i.e. Grenade Launcher, Sniper Rifle, Chainsaw, etc.)

They Have Heightened Senses and Are Stronger, and More Agile

They Don't Sleep in Coffins

THEY DO NOT F*CKING SPARKLE!

 

Cake mentioned "Futbol". And why are you even saying "DO NOT WANT F*CKING SPARKLE" when I said I was trolling for a reaction? Don't be a noob.

 

Yes, this topic is about OPINIONS, as the sparkle thing was a faux opinion used for trolling by me.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You people are so stupid. And Futbol is gay, it's called Football and us English invented the modern game. It involves kicking a round ball around, not prancing about in helmets.

 

successful-troll-is-successful.jpg

 

Have a Rep, my fellow Liverpudlian.

 

Why were vampires dubbed "Creatures of the Night"? Because they would die in the day. Simple. As. f***.

 

Seriously, Vampire badassery died in recent years, the most recent examples of good vampires being Helsing, Legacy of Kain and Twilight.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

ENOUGH OF F***ING FUTBALL, OR FOOTBALL, OR FATBALL, OR WHATEVER!!!!!!! STAY ON TOPIC YOU *** **** ** ***** *** ***.

 

Anyways, Twilight turned vampires into ice-cold douchebags. Douchebags who sparkle, leave forever, come back, propose (i think..), and fight anthropomorphic dogs for no apparent reason.

 

Why cant Hollywood just make normal, nonsparkly, creatures of the notdaytime with a thirst for human blood.

 

Speaking of which (going slightly off topic), I have yet to see anyone drink blood in Twilight.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

ENOUGH OF F***ING FUTBALL, OR FOOTBALL, OR FATBALL, OR WHATEVER!!!!!!! STAY ON TOPIC YOU *** **** ** ***** *** ***.

 

Anyways, Twilight turned vampires into ice-cold douchebags. Douchebags who sparkle, leave forever, come back, propose (i think..), and fight anthropomorphic dogs for no apparent reason.

 

Why cant Hollywood just make normal, nonsparkly, creatures of the notdaytime with a thirst for human blood.

 

Speaking of which (going slightly off topic), I have yet to see anyone drink blood in Twilight.

 

Werewolves. Another mythos that Meyer has f***ed up.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Why is it that people say that vampires don't sparkle? Have you seen one? Vampires can sparkle in one's imagination and it just so happened that one person made a book out of this idea. I'm not saying I like Twillight, but he fact that people bash it for stupid reasons like "Vampires don't sparkle" makes me angry. Grr. And stuff.

 

Also, Twillight's supposed to be a dramatic romance book, so you can expect it to be bad to about 99.9% of males. The main story's not much about the vampires but the messed up story about a human and a vampire making lubs and vampihuman babies. I think. ._.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
×
×
  • Create New...