-SJ- Posted February 21, 2011 Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 [img]http://i53.tinypic.com/1omzbs.jpg[/img] Effect: This card can only be Summoned if you control a LIGHT monster. If your opponent activates a card that removes a card on the field or Graveyard from play, you can have this card lost 400 ATK and DEF to negate that card's activation and effect and destroy it. Once per turn, if this card would be destroyed by a card effect, it is not. I was concerned that this card would be a lower version of Light and Darkness Dragon. But the effect is goes according with the image. I try to contain myself so it will not be overpowered, but this is not my best work. Engage your critique mode. Destroy this card. But I want a good base for your arguments. Forget about the image, because the image is awesome itself. It came from Jazin Kay's Archive. EDITED : No more mistakes, I think so. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FTW (For The Wynn) Posted February 21, 2011 Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 For future reference, you should probably post the effect as well with the card. It makes it easier to make critiques for those of us who tend to be lazy ^^ Anyway, your grammar is off some. What kind of card does your opponent have to activate? I'll go into detail after you fix it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-SJ- Posted February 21, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 [quote name='FTW (For The Wynn)' timestamp='1298313102' post='5023821'] For future reference, you should probably post the effect as well with the card. It makes it easier to make critiques for those of us who tend to be lazy ^^ Anyway, your grammar is off some. What kind of card does your opponent have to activate? I'll go into detail after you fix it. [/quote] Sorry , I forgot this detail. Anyway, I edited it. Now critique me until I die. I will give you a Positive Reply for reminding me of this Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blizz3112 Posted February 21, 2011 Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 Text of card should be better worded, also the first effect makes little sense. I would change it so people won't be able to abuse Foolish Burial method and use this card's effects in their advantage over normal summoning it: This card cannot be Special Summoned from your Graveyard. This card can only be Tribute Summoned using at least one LIGHT monster as a sacrifice. If your opponent activates a card that would remove a card(s) from play, you can have this card lose 400 ATK and DEF to negate that card's effect and destroy it. Once per turn, this card is not destroyed by a card effect that would destroy it. Overall a great attempt to a card... 8/10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WTFauKorean Posted February 21, 2011 Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 im not really an ocg master... in fact i suck at ocg, but theres one thing i know you can fix is the grammer. uhhhhm i think 1 ocg is instead of card activation you can just use negate card's effect. i like the art work seems pretty balanced uhhhhm i dont know about the effect yet but grammer fixes and ill look at that again also i recomend asking BT for ocg help he's a pro Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FTW (For The Wynn) Posted February 21, 2011 Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 [quote]This card can only be Summoned if you control a LIGHT monster. If your opponent activates [b](what? A Spell? A Trap? Any card?)[/b] that removes a card on the field or Graveyard from play, you can have this card lose 400 ATK and DEF to negate that card's activation [s]and effect[/s] and destroy it. Once per turn, if this card would be destroyed by a card effect, it is not.[/quote] Other than a few small mistakes, not bad. It isn't all that original, considering it is basically an improved Light and Darkness Dragon. Perhaps it is OP'd, but I'm not sure what to tell you on that because I'm not sure what you could do to balance it atm. Overall 7/10 Good job ^^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-SJ- Posted February 21, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 Thanks for the critiques. And Blizz, you do not ever say sacrifice. But thanks for the Summon clause, it clears my eyes. People, I see that I screwd up big on this because I am such a mess today. I am sick and full of homework. But do not stop, keep commenting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.Ash Posted February 21, 2011 Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 [quote name='FTW (For The Wynn)' timestamp='1298313102' post='5023821'] For future reference, you should probably post the effect as well with the card. It makes it easier to make critiques for those of us who tend to be lazy ^^ Anyway, your grammar is off some. [b]What kind of card does your opponent have to activate?[/b] I'll go into detail after you fix it. [/quote] One that removes a card from play. Basically, if this is a Quick Effect (like LADD), it'll respond to pretty much anything that isn't a Counter Trap. As for the card, the summoning requirements are quite awful. At least it can actually be Special Summoned, although I've yet to think of good practical way. The restriction of LIGHT monsters being needed is unnecessary, although personal testing with Lightsworns mean that the card is viable, although they have better Tribute Summon options in the form of Celestia. Aside from that, the effect is similar to Light and Darkness Dragon, although this card's effect pales in comparison. Where Light and Darkness Dragon responds to almost anything, there are few played cards that this would activate in response to, cutting playability even more. If there was a good practical way of summoning this card, it probably still wouldn't be great - again due to needing LIGHT monsters on the field, and a lack of versatility in it's effect. As for OCG, look for someone who spams other cards with just an OCG fix, because frankly I couldn't care less about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FTW (For The Wynn) Posted February 21, 2011 Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 [quote name='.:Snowy:.' timestamp='1298313963' post='5023859'] One that removes a card from play. Basically, if this is a Quick Effect (like LADD), it'll respond to pretty much anything that isn't a Counter Trap. As for the card, the summoning requirements are quite awful. At least it can actually be Special Summoned, although I've yet to think of good practical way. The restriction of LIGHT monsters being needed is unnecessary, although personal testing with Lightsworns mean that the card is viable, although they have better Tribute Summon options in the form of Celestia. Aside from that, the effect is similar to Light and Darkness Dragon, although this card's effect pales in comparison. Where Light and Darkness Dragon responds to almost anything, there are few played cards that this would activate in response to, cutting playability even more. If there was a good practical way of summoning this card, it probably still wouldn't be great - again due to needing LIGHT monsters on the field, and a lack of versatility in it's effect. As for OCG, look for someone who spams other cards with just an OCG fix, because frankly I couldn't care less about it. [/quote] I repped for an actually decent review. I misread a part. However, you forget that L&D's effect isn't optional, it's required. This is more specific and optional and can't be destroyed by card effects (even if it is hard to summon). Edit: Also, I knew how the effect activated, it just didn't show it too well in the card. That was the point I was trying to make ^^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Icy Posted February 21, 2011 Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 It really does feel like a low powered LaDD... Maybe change the effect to RFP a card they control instead of actually negating the effect? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.Ash Posted February 21, 2011 Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 LADD is good, regardless of it's effect being compulsory. If it were optional, I imagine you'd activate it's effect whenever possible. As with this card, due to the main targets of it's effect being cards such as Chaos Sorcerer, Bottomless Trap Hole, Dimensional Prison (although the last two have not seen as much play nowadays admittedly), you would likely want to activate this card's effect whenever possible. There are other possibilities, such as Macro Cosmos and Dimensional Fissure but I'm unsure on how much they're actually used. I would state further examples, but it is like I said - there are not many valid targets for this card nowadays. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-SJ- Posted February 21, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 [quote name='JoshIcy' timestamp='1298316214' post='5023943'] It really does feel like a low powered LaDD... Maybe change the effect to RFP a card they control instead of actually negating the effect? [/quote] My first though was a copy of Stardust, but Once per turn and no tribute, but this is a good idea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGenuine Posted February 21, 2011 Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 It seems really effective and I like Light and Darkness Dragon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BT Posted February 22, 2011 Report Share Posted February 22, 2011 cool card and effect... umm... when you write the effect plz set it on justified... i forgot to put that in the template ^^" This card can only be Summoned if you control a LIGHT monster. If your opponent activates a Spell or Trap Card whose effect removes a card on the field or in either player's Graveyard from play, you can decrease this card's ATK and DEF by 400 to negate the card's activation and effect and destroy it. Once per turn, if this card would be destroyed by a card effect, it is not. Original: 8/10 Creative: 9/10 Pic: 19/20 OCG: 15/20 Usage: 9.8/10 ATK/DEF/Level agreement: 19.5/20 Effect: 9/10 O.R. 89.3/100 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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