JadenxAtemYAOI Posted November 10, 2011 Report Share Posted November 10, 2011 Twilight, a story of a girl's choice between Necrophilia and Bestiality. The story begins with a narration by a young girl named Bella that is as pale an albino human. The characters Jacob Black, Charlie the father, and Edward Cullen are introduced rather early. On Bella's first day of school she is hit on by many boys, well known, and well liked enough some people want her for dinner. In each of her classes she sees a young man named Edward Cullen staring at her with angry eyes which were actually signs of intense craving. Oh look out Bella, I think he likes your tuna. After school she meets up her old friend Jacob Black. Now let us focus on the character Jacob black. He is a shapeshifter and drives a motorcycle. Oh how original. Isn't there another shapeshifter that turns into a dog and rides a motorcycle, oh yes, Sirius Black. So now we know so far about Stephanie Meyer, the author is; she lacks originality, she knows her diseases, and she is a woman with some weird fetishes. So half-way through the movie Bella starts suspecting Edward is different and researches possibilities. One day after she has done a lot of research she gets kidnapped by Edward and doesn't scream. He later exposes he is indeed a vampire. a 117 year old vampire that apparently sparkles like a fairy. He then confesses that he wants to do nothing but eat her and drain her of her blood. Is it just me or does it appear as if this girl is suicidal already? Jacob takes notice of this and shows hate and jealousy towards the young vampire which indicates the love triangle forming. Towards the end of the movie she is forced to leave her house to save a loved one and says a few last words to her father. Now onto her father, her mother left her saying a few last words out the door. her father has an unusually strong friendship with Jacob's father. After saving Bella's life Edward wants Bella to marry him l. So in the end, this story teaches young girls to 1) marry their stalkers 2) date the man that kidnaps you in the woods 3) Your best lovers are a fluffy dog and a dead human. 4) That vampires sparkle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tentacruel Posted November 10, 2011 Report Share Posted November 10, 2011 It's tween porn. What'd ya expect? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
·Toot Posted November 10, 2011 Report Share Posted November 10, 2011 funny way to put it I lol'd at teh homosexual relationship part Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Agro Posted November 10, 2011 Report Share Posted November 10, 2011 Jsyk. I work at a movie theatre... yeah. Stuff goes bat-s*** crazy and I want to tear my face off just to avoid having to talk to twilight fans (or as they're better known: 10-16 y.o. girls with no idea what they're talking about. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thar Posted November 10, 2011 Report Share Posted November 10, 2011 Yes, and the love triangle. Totally ripped from She's the Man which was ripped from a Mid-Summer Night's Dream. Society. Is. Pathetic. [quote name='Tentacruel' timestamp='1320889296' post='5629664'] It's tween porn. What'd ya expect? [/quote] I expected the publishers of this book to convince the author otherwise. Same with the producers of the movie. Society. Is. Pathetic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Revan of the Sith Posted November 11, 2011 Report Share Posted November 11, 2011 [quote name='JadenxAtemYAOI' timestamp='1320889181' post='5629660'] Twilight, a story of a girl's choice between Necrophilia and Bestiality. The story begins with a narration by a young girl named Bella that is as pale an albino human. The characters Jacob Black, Charlie the father, and Edward Cullen are introduced rather early. On Bella's first day of school she is hit on by many boys, well known, and well liked enough some people want her for dinner. In each of her classes she sees a young man named Edward Cullen staring at her with angry eyes which were actually signs of intense craving. Oh look out Bella, I think he likes your tuna. After school she meets up her old friend Jacob Black. Now let us focus on the character Jacob black. He is a shapeshifter and drives a motorcycle. Oh how original. Isn't there another shapeshifter that turns into a dog and rides a motorcycle, oh yes, Sirius Black. So now we know so far about Stephanie Meyer, the author is; she lacks originality, she knows her diseases, and she is a woman with some weird sexual fetishes. So half-way through the movie Bella starts suspecting Edward is different and researches possibilities. One day after she has done a lot of research she gets kidnapped by Edward and doesn't scream. Is it just me or does it seem this girl has a really slutty past to not be afraid of getting taken in the woods by a young man. He later exposes he is indeed a vampire. a 117 year old vampire that apparently sparkles like a fairy. He then confesses that he wants to do nothing but eat her and drain her of her blood. Is it just me or does it appear as if this girl is suicidal already? Well, anyway, falling in love with her predator and wanting him sexually a week after dating we can already presume young Bella is either a whore or a cum dumpster wanting children. Jacob takes notice of this and shows hate and jealousy towards the young vampire which indicates the love triangle forming. Towards the end of the movie she is forced to leave her house to save a loved one and says a few last words to her father. Now onto her father, her mother left her saying a few last words out the door. her father has an unusually strong friendship with Jacob's father, more than likely a homosexual relationship. After saving Bella's life Edward wants Bella to marry him before they get sexual. So in the end, this story teaches young girls to 1) marry their stalkers 2) date the man that might rape you in the woods 3) Your best lovers are a fluffy dog and a dead human. 4) That vampires sparkle [/quote] OMJ This is great! I can't stop laughing... In regards to the movie it wasn't bad, but it still sucked... I ended up giving that movie a good 4/10 and New moon I gave a 2/10 but I did gve Eclipse 7.7/10 say what you want about the movie byut I believe David Slade saved the franchise... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ragavan.g43 Posted November 15, 2011 Report Share Posted November 15, 2011 Its a nice story,,its like a triangle love story ,,but one thing i can say that girls heart is like a ocean and no body can understand them....? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarbleZone Posted November 15, 2011 Report Share Posted November 15, 2011 Cute and all, but the language just isn't acceptable. Sorry if it loses its charm that way, but kids read these books. Keep that in mind. Edited. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Randy al'Thor Posted November 15, 2011 Report Share Posted November 15, 2011 If the book was really written seriously in your interpretation, it would've been even better than what we have now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Great Unclean One: VK Posted November 16, 2011 Report Share Posted November 16, 2011 Vampire Kisses is way better then this piece of crap. [img]http://static1.minitokyo.net/view/15/04/415215.jpg[/img] At least the Vampire in that story was at least rich and had a goddamn mansion to himself and not to mention a half vampire brother that tried to kill him and his gf. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bury the year Posted November 19, 2011 Report Share Posted November 19, 2011 [quote]Oh look out Bella, I think he likes your [b]tuna.[/b][/quote] Whether this was the OP or Marbles... Best. Euphemism. Ever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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