Because I wanted to see how small the text would be

[AGATHODAIMON BANGTAIL COW]

[img]http://i.imgur.com/TaVYV.jpg[/img]
Activate the following effect depending on how many cards are on the field (including this card):
1: Randomly select 1 card in your opponent's Hand; return it to the top of the Deck.
2: Destroy 1 card on the field.
3: Increase the ATK/DEF of 1 monster on the field by 1000 until the end of the next turn.
4: Look at your opponent's Hand and select 1 monster. That monster cannot be Summoned until your opponent's End Phase.
5: Randomly discard 1 card (from your opponent's Hand).
6: Special Summon 1 monster (from your Graveyard or Banish Pile) to your side of the field.
7: Gain 2500 life points.
8: Look at your opponent's Hand and discard 1 card from it.
9: Inflict 1000 points of damage to your opponent.
10: Destroy up to 2 cards on the field.
11: Draw 2 cards.
12: Inflict 1000 points of damage to your opponent and draw 1 card.
13: Banish all Spell and Trap cards on your opponent's side of the field.
14: Gain 4000 life points.
15: Banish all cards in your opponent's Graveyard.
16: Change the level of any number of monsters (the monsters do not have to have the same level as each other).
17: Your opponent cannot activate Spell or Trap cards until the end of the next turn.
18: Banish all cards in your opponent's Hand.
19: Draw 6 cards and destroy up to 3 cards on the field.
20: Banish all cards on your opponent's side of the field.
21: Inflict 4000 points of damage to your opponent and gain 4000 life points.
22: Win the duel.

Image is from Jazin Kay because I didn't want to get frustrated with Google.

Anyway, I decided to give it good-ish effects, then give it more broken effects as the amount of the cards relied more on your opponent. And having 22 cards on the field is such a rare occurrence that I decided that "win the duel" is worth it.

[M F]

extremmly powerful card
unfair conditions

[Sorin Markov]

the card is overpowered it got no drawbacks what so ever.
all the abilities of this card hurt your opponent and not you.
Should be a Normal Trap card so you at least wait 1 turn to use it, and at least it not continues trap or spell card.
This card rating is a 3/10

Hint- Try to make it more balance before making it longer.

[AGATHODAIMON BANGTAIL COW]

The "drawback" of this card is that you might not get the effect that you need, and I'm not going to give it effects like "send your hand to the graveyard" because your opponent can just chain effects to it and then make this card completely screw you over, though I considered it at first. Also, the fact that it is a Quick-play adds to the "all of the sudden, randomness" feel of the card. Also, making it Continuous would be utterly stupid because your opponent can easily manipulate this and if they can't, they can just blow it off of the field with a MST/Heavy.

But I made this just for a "small text!" card, and as thus, just started throwing effects together. But I did decide that some of the earlier effects were OP, so they got toned down a little. The later effects, however, would require a massive field presence from both players, which doesn't happen that often.

[Expelsword]

21 cards is the maximum, isn't it?
There can only be one Field Spell.

[AGATHODAIMON BANGTAIL COW]

According to Tag Force games, you can Set a Field Spell while your opponent has one that is active, and they'll both be there. :/

[Expelsword]

You know, that's true. But I never see it happening.
You can make this realistic, but it needs blanket ranges of effect (ie. 1-4 cards) that are slightly less variable. In the meantime, reading this card's effect would be considered unsportsmanlike stalling.

[AGATHODAIMON BANGTAIL COW]

Hence why I put this in AoC. You would need a telescope to read this thing and its 23 lines... :/

And I really just did this for the text, so I might not go on and make it realistic enough for RC/WC. Its job is pretty much done, but I might revisit this one day.