The Horde

[Flame Dragon]

[spoiler=Old Version]

 

3 Level 4 Zombies-Type monsters
This card gains 1000 ATK and DEF for each Xyz Material. Once per turn: Sacrifice a Zombie-Type monster on your side of the field; attach that monster to this card. If this card is targeted or would be destroyed by a card effect: Detach 1 XYZ Material from this card; negate the activation and destroy it. 

[/spoiler]

3 Level 4 Zombie-Type monsters
This card gains 1000 ATK and DEF for each Xyz Material attached to it. Once per turn: You can Target 1 Zombie-Type monster on your side of the field; attach that monster to this card as an Xyz Material. Once per turn, If this card is targeted or would be destroyed by a card effect: You can Detach 1 Xyz Material from this card; negate the activation and destroy it. 
 
Its been a LONG time since I made a Yugi card. As such how it interacts with the actual meta game is nothing something I care about, nor did it influence how I made this. I am interested in how the design works over all and the power level in a vacuum. I'd also like to have the actual text match up with how the game writes things. I tried me best, but odds are its off.
 
 
Anyway, if this goes well I might make some more cards in honor of halloween.

[Not-so-Radiant Arin]

Given your M:tG history, "Sacrifice" means to ditch a card, right? If that's the case, you'll have to reword this effect. Actually, there's a couple of things that need to be re-written, but I'll get to that at the end of my review. Gogogo Zombies are a thing, given that they run 3 Zombie Master and can more than afford to make this card to instantly get out a 3k beater. The whole "Sacrifice" thing is redundant; if you wanted to attach a monster you control to the card, you would just say so: "Attach that monster to this card as an Xyz Material". The effect negation is a bit on the broken side however. Mainly starting off, it's not once per turn, which means you can just shut down any and all of your opponent's attempts to get rid of this card. With D-Prison now only at 1, it becomes a lot harder to take down cards like these. Add on to that that it can infinitely replenish itself so long as you keep Zombies out on the field, you've basically got a walking negater that renders all of your opponent's plays useless. I would only keep it to being destroyed, and say "You can Detach 1 Xyz Material from this card; Negate this card's destruction", so that your opponent isn't swamped trying to use up all their resources attempting to take down this card. If you decide to keep it to the original effect, however, I would strongly suggest a once-per-turn clause. Otherwise, it's pretty ridiculous.

 

Now, like I said to wrap up, I'll toss out my OCG fixes. Hover your mouse over underlined portions to see fixes.

 

 

3 Level 4 Zombie-Type monsters

This card gains 1000 ATK and DEF for each Xyz Material [acronym='Proper wording, more or less.']attached to it[/acronym]. Once per turn: [acronym='Like I said in my review, it's redundant to Tribute, or "Sacrifice", and then attach that card to it as an Xyz Material. You also need to specify a proper Phase in which to activate the effect, if it is a mandatory effect, or add a "You can" to the card to signify an Ignition Effect.'] You can Target 1 [/acronym] Zombie-Type monster on your side of the field; attach that monster to this card [acronym='Again, proper wording.']as an Xyz Material[/acronym]. [acronym='Tossing in my own balance here.']Once per turn[/acronym], If this card is targeted or would be destroyed by a card effect: [acronym='Same deal as before. Ignition Effect or Maintenance Cost?']You can [/acronym]Detach 1 [acronym='XYZ is an Archetype.']Xyz[/acronym] Material from this card; negate the activation and destroy it.

 

[Flame Dragon]

Given your M:tG history, "Sacrifice" means to ditch a card, right? If that's the case, you'll have to reword this effect. Actually, there's a couple of things that need to be re-written, but I'll get to that at the end of my review. Gogogo Zombies are a thing, given that they run 3 Zombie Master and can more than afford to make this card to instantly get out a 3k beater. The whole "Sacrifice" thing is redundant; if you wanted to attach a monster you control to the card, you would just say so: "Attach that monster to this card as an Xyz Material". The effect negation is a bit on the broken side however. Mainly starting off, it's not once per turn, which means you can just shut down any and all of your opponent's attempts to get rid of this card. With D-Prison now only at 1, it becomes a lot harder to take down cards like these. Add on to that that it can infinitely replenish itself so long as you keep Zombies out on the field, you've basically got a walking negater that renders all of your opponent's plays useless. I would only keep it to being destroyed, and say "You can Detach 1 Xyz Material from this card; Negate this card's destruction", so that your opponent isn't swamped trying to use up all their resources attempting to take down this card. If you decide to keep it to the original effect, however, I would strongly suggest a once-per-turn clause. Otherwise, it's pretty ridiculous.

Now, like I said to wrap up, I'll toss out my OCG fixes. Hover your mouse over underlined portions to see fixes.

 

Sacrifice would be a lot like Yugi's tribute. I looked at a handful of Xyzs while making this so I didn't see that you can just attach things on the field. That is helpful, thanks.

As I said, I know nothing of the meta in yugi (been 3 years since I played) so I can't design while trying to keep way from current decks.

What I was going for with the final effect was to make it so anything that targets it will drop its attack. For example trying to equip something to it will triggers. Its like if a horde of zombies is attacking you can easily take out one of them, but taking out the whole horde is much harder. It should also be able to be killed by anything that is bigger than it in battle though. I do think the final effect can be pulled back a bit but I'm not sure how without keeping those things true.

 

Either way, I'll go with your template while I try to solve that issue. 

[Not-so-Radiant Arin]

Ahh, it's beautiful.  :wub: