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What is the Master Hand?

nobody9999

By nobody9999
in Polls

What is the Master Hand?  

1 member has voted

  1. 1. What is the Master Hand?

    • An over imaginative child
      3
    • The entity of creation
      4
    • A big glove
      6
    • Other (Please specify)
      7

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Egnio Newbie

Egnio

Posted
Posted

Master Hand is:

 

A) Master Chief's name inspiration

B) The thing that makes possible the Masterbation

C) Some random hand with Master prefixed to sound more creepy

D) Sakurai's idea of stealing a boss of his own Kirby series and use him as a final boss on his Smash Bros series.

 

While D might be the correct one, you can't argue against B ;3

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HORUS Newbie

HORUS

Posted
Posted

Master Hand was conceived by King Goblingus, Creator of Existence and Himself. Master Hand was born of an immaculate conception, and attached himself to the arm of a human bizarrely named "Jesus". Master Hand manipulated Jesus similarly to the manipulative power of goblins. Jesus, under Master Hand's control, created Super Smash Brothers Melee, almonds, and spiders, which are all pretty frickin awesome. When Jesus died, Master Hand's power was transferred to Static's penis to give him an extra boost, and Static then wrote, directed and Filmed the movie ET, to defer beliefs of humans that Aliens existed by providing an animatronic psycho loser alien thing. Three days later, Jesus came back from the dead, and Master Hand tried to re-enter Jesus' mind.

 

Surprisingly, the attempt failed. The police were all-upon him after John the Baptist performed a citizens arrest, and Master Hand was exiled to Final Destination, where he was forced to lose to cartoon heroes day after day.

 

A sad, but true, story.

 

 

BTW, Master Hand also wrote the Bible. "Bible" in the Goblin language is a term for "Stupid sheet i made up for the entertainment of myself and the impending enslavement of hooman kind."

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Static Newbie

Static

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Posted

Master Hand was conceived by King Goblingus' date=' Creator of Existence and Himself. Master Hand was born of an immaculate conception, and attached himself to the arm of a human bizarrely named "Jesus". Master Hand manipulated Jesus similarly to the manipulative power of goblins. Jesus, under Master Hand's control, created Super Smash Brothers Melee, almonds, and spiders, which are all pretty frickin awesome. When Jesus died, Master Hand's power was transferred to Static's penis to give him an extra boost, and Static then wrote, directed and Filmed the movie ET, to defer beliefs of humans that Aliens existed by providing an animatronic psycho loser alien thing. Three days later, Jesus came back from the dead, and Master Hand tried to re-enter Jesus' mind.

 

Surprisingly, the attempt failed. The police were all-upon him after John the Baptist performed a citizens arrest, and Master Hand was exiled to Final Destination, where he was forced to lose to cartoon heroes day after day.

 

A sad, but true, story.

 

 

BTW, Master Hand also wrote the Bible. "Bible" in the Goblin language is a term for "Stupid s*** i made up for the entertainment of myself and the impending enslavement of hooman kind."

[/quote']

 

So what I am getting from this is that my penis has the power of God's prodigy?

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HORUS Newbie

HORUS

Posted
Posted

King Goblingus was not God, as Kingy was created by himself, and, well, frankly, God kinda makes himself look better than he is...with all that Ten Commandments and Sins nonsense.

 

Basically what I am saying is very difficult to say in English. Simplified, it all means your penis is that of King Goblingus. This fact was hidden from you for years, and it took a lot of planning to keep you from reading your own mind and discovering your true identity.

 

Great powers will come in time.

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Sixty Newbie

Sixty

Posted
Posted

It's a kid wearing a glove playing with action figures. Plush dolls.

 

Exactly.

 

In the first game, MH floats around the room, then takes a Kirby plush and a DK plush from a toy box. MH then makes a stage on this desk out of a pencil jar and some books. Snapping his fingers, the the table becomes an arena, made from the kid's imagination.

 

In later games, he sounds even more ominous, with his strange OOH-AH-HAHAHA. Who knows what the Master Hand is?

 

 

Here's what Wikipedia says:

Master Hand (マスターハンド, Masutā Hando?) appears in all three games to date, serving as the final boss of Classic Mode and, in Super Smash Bros. Melee, the 50th Event Match "Final Destination Match". Super Smash Bros. Melee introduced a left-hand counterpart to Master Hand named Crazy Hand (クレイジーハンド, Kureijī Hando?), which appears alongside Master Hand in some scenarios. Master Hand also makes several appearances in Kirby & the Amazing Mirror as a miniboss, and partnered with Crazy Hand as the bosses of Candy Constellation. He also makes an appearance in Kirby: Squeak Squad as a gray hand that can shift its shape to form swords and the like.

 

Master Hand and Crazy Hand look identical aside from their laterality, but Crazy Hand's fingers act in a more erratic and chaotic way. While Master Hand is more relaxed and mature, Crazy Hand is impulsive and destructive and his fingers move differently when he's preparing for an attack. His attacks are also wilder and faster than those of Master Hand. When being fought simultaneously, Crazy Hand and Master Hand are able to execute moves together, including a series of claps, and the two hands making fists.

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  • 4 weeks later...
Guest Supreme Gamesmaster

Guest Supreme Gamesmaster

Posted
Posted

Master Hand is:

 

A) Master Chief's name inspiration

B) The thing that makes possible the Masterbation

C) Some random hand with Master prefixed to sound more creepy

D) Sakurai's idea of stealing a boss of his own Kirby series and use him as a final boss on his Smash Bros series.

 

While D might be the correct one' date=' you can't argue against B ;3

[/quote']

 

Master Hand was in Smash Bros. before he was in Kirby. Anyway, I think the being that can best answer this question would be Master Hand itself.

 

Greetings' date=' muahaha. BTW, I'm VERY insulted about the (B) statement in the above quote. Although I did write the Bible. Kinda dumb how people take it so seriously and don't give me ANY credit. Curse you even more, Aten.

 

ANYWAY. My existence began with that of the universe's, as did all of ours. The first atom of matter and the first atom of anti-matter randomly appeared and multiplied, eventually exploding into the first universe. However, dark matter was vacant from this universe, so, some time after fully sentient life had developed akin to this universe's, that universe collapsed upon itself. A boy named Ray Sakron and a girl named Hana Razaniel lucid dreamed themselves and all of their friends to another, previously nonexistent universe, known as Saqrundica. It was made entirely of anti-matter waiting to be converted to matter. However, Ray had only enough imaginative energy left to create one other thing, so he cheated and created me, the Master Hand, manifest in his own severed right hand.

 

I then created all seventeen Saqrundican universes. Later, it became necessary to destroy one of the universes that had been turned completely to darkness, so on August 19 of an unnamed year, Hana, now dubbed Ahocaz, created the Crazy Hand to bring about the Apocalypse and reset the world. Now, Crazy Hand and I are brothers and companions.

 

The last ditch effort of my creation led to the unfortunate circumstance of me going insane once every five years, so Ray, now the Supreme Gamesmaster Xenyar, had to face me in a bizzarely judged form of all-out combat (Xenyar had to inflict so much damage, which was turned into 444 points; that is now the Super Smash Bros. damage percentage system to settle me down for the next half a decade). He was visited from the future by the current Supreme Gamesmaster, Yddisac, and told Xenyar that instead of facing me directly, he and Crazy Hand should throw a tournament to select a dimensional champion, with the knowledge that one year, the I would be settled forever. That's how Super Smash Bros. came about. When I was beaten by Link, I organized the SSBM tournament, and led the protagonists against Azrdvfk Vreighar during SSBB. That's how Super Smash Bros. came about.

 

So you see, all of the poll options are right. Though beyond the Rift, I am but a figment of a child's imagination, within it, I created all of its inhabitants, living or otherwise. Quintessentially, in battle, I'm a giant glove. And yet, given my unique lack of omnipotence, I am completely different from all of them. The only ones that got me wrong were the ones that thought I was related to Static's penis. I have nothing to do with Static's penis, and am infinitely more powerful than it.

[/quote']

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