(Casual Players fun attempt) Three turtle cards

[KidPhillip]

 

let me know what you guys think of 'em :)

 

[TheWanderingMist]

Well, the grammar needs a bit of fixing and there are other issues, like the tribute thing it does being unlimited. Imagine unlimited Tribute Summons in a Monarch Deck. Also, with how many effects "Shrine" has, it may as well be the archetype's Field Spell. Do you want the monsters to be able to attack while in Defense Position or just use their DEF when battling? Because the current way you have them worded leaves them with 0 ATK when being attacked, which I doubt is what you intended. I'll show you both options and just pick which one you meant. Also, turtles are reptiles in real life, so they'd probably go for that in game unless they had attributes of other creatures as well, which these don't seem to have. 

 

So, here we go:

 

Shrine To The Turtle Beasts

Field Spell

When this card is activated, send all other Field Spells to the GY. While this card is face-up on the field, your opponent cannot activate Field Spells. If you control a "Turtle-Beast" monster, you can conduct 1 Tribute Summon per turn in addition to your Normal Summon. If this card leaves the field by a card effect, the player who activated that effect must Tribute 1 monster. "Turtle-Beast" monsters you control cannot be targeted by Trap cards. Once per turn, you can add 1 "Turtle-Beast" monster from your Deck to your hand.

Grammar has been fixed and also it is no longer an insane power boost for Monarch Decks. Though Monarch Decks would probably still really like this card and play a "Turtle-Beast" just to use it.

The First Turtle-Beast

Level 4

WATER

Reptile

ATK 0/DEF 2100

You can Special Summon this card from your hand if your opponent Special Summoned a monster on their previous turn. If a player would Special Summon a monster, they must also Tribute 1 monster in addition to its other summoning conditions.

While this card is face-up on the field:

Option 1: All monsters can attack while in Defense Position, and if they do, apply their DEF for damage calculation
Option 2: If a monster battles, apply its DEF instead of its ATK for damage calculation.

 

Grammar fixed.

Shellshock Armored Turtle-Beast

Level 5

WATER

Reptile

ATK 0/DEF 3000

You can Special Summon this card from your hand if you control a "Turtle-Beast" monster with a different name. You can only use this effect of "Shellshock Armored Turtle-Beast" once per turn. While this card is face-up on the field:

Option 1: All monsters can attack while in Defense Position, and if they do, apply their DEF for damage calculation
Option 2: If a monster battles, apply its DEF instead of its ATK for damage calculation.

While this card is face-up on the field, any activated Spell cards which would be sent to the GY when they resolve remain face-up on the field instead. If this card is destroyed by battle or card effect (whether it is sent to the GY or banished), you can pay 500 LP: Special Summon it.

Grammar fixed and effect modified.

I'm guessing what you wanted by the Spells not going to the grave was to activate them once per turn, but even if they stayed on the field as Continuous Spells, you wouldn't be able to activate them again because they were already activated. So I modified it a bit to make them clutter up the Spell/Trap Zone instead.
 

I'm not the best at fixing cards, so you may want a second opinion.

[KidPhillip]

On 8/11/2020 at 2:56 PM, TheWanderingMist said:

Well, the grammar needs a bit of fixing and there are other issues, like the tribute thing it does being unlimited. Imagine unlimited Tribute Summons in a Monarch Deck. Also, with how many effects "Shrine" has, it may as well be the archetype's Field Spell. Do you want the monsters to be able to attack while in Defense Position or just use their DEF when battling? Because the current way you have them worded leaves them with 0 ATK when being attacked, which I doubt is what you intended. I'll show you both options and just pick which one you meant. Also, turtles are reptiles in real life, so they'd probably go for that in game unless they had attributes of other creatures as well, which these don't seem to have. 

 

So, here we go:

 

Shrine To The Turtle Beasts

Field Spell

When this card is activated, send all other Field Spells to the GY. While this card is face-up on the field, your opponent cannot activate Field Spells. If you control a "Turtle-Beast" monster, you can conduct 1 Tribute Summon per turn in addition to your Normal Summon. If this card leaves the field by a card effect, the player who activated that effect must Tribute 1 monster. "Turtle-Beast" monsters you control cannot be targeted by Trap cards. Once per turn, you can add 1 "Turtle-Beast" monster from your Deck to your hand.

Grammar has been fixed and also it is no longer an insane power boost for Monarch Decks. Though Monarch Decks would probably still really like this card and play a "Turtle-Beast" just to use it.

The First Turtle-Beast

Level 4

WATER

Reptile

ATK 0/DEF 2100

You can Special Summon this card from your hand if your opponent Special Summoned a monster on their previous turn. If a player would Special Summon a monster, they must also Tribute 1 monster in addition to its other summoning conditions.

While this card is face-up on the field:

Option 1: All monsters can attack while in Defense Position, and if they do, apply their DEF for damage calculation
Option 2: If a monster battles, apply its DEF instead of its ATK for damage calculation.

 

Grammar fixed.

Shellshock Armored Turtle-Beast

Level 5

WATER

Reptile

ATK 0/DEF 3000

You can Special Summon this card from your hand if you control a "Turtle-Beast" monster with a different name. You can only use this effect of "Shellshock Armored Turtle-Beast" once per turn. While this card is face-up on the field:

Option 1: All monsters can attack while in Defense Position, and if they do, apply their DEF for damage calculation
Option 2: If a monster battles, apply its DEF instead of its ATK for damage calculation.

While this card is face-up on the field, any activated Spell cards which would be sent to the GY when they resolve remain face-up on the field instead. If this card is destroyed by battle or card effect (whether it is sent to the GY or banished), you can pay 500 LP: Special Summon it.

Grammar fixed and effect modified.

I'm guessing what you wanted by the Spells not going to the grave was to activate them once per turn, but even if they stayed on the field as Continuous Spells, you wouldn't be able to activate them again because they were already activated. So I modified it a bit to make them clutter up the Spell/Trap Zone instead.
 

I'm not the best at fixing cards, so you may want a second opinion.

i appreciate you coming to this thread to post a reply! i read through your post and approve of your changes. 

 

i prefer option 2. and with Shellshock, that is exactly what i wanted albeit you had better card grammar.  not sure why shrine art isn't showing but it's supposed to be here: (attached)

 

i tried making one more; i want to know your opinion of this card haha..

 

 If a player would Special Summon a monster that has attack greater than it's defense, they must also Tribute 1 monster in addition to its other summoning conditions. You can Special Summon this card from your hand if you control atleast two different "Turtle-Beast" monsters and pay 500 LP. 

While this card is face-up on the field: 
 If a monster battles, apply its DEF instead of its ATK for damage calculation.

the overall theme i want to go for is, is using def instead of atk during battle, and making it increasingly hard to special summon while focusing on the oldest summoning mechanic of tribute summoning. Interested in hearing your second opinion on this and more thoughts about where you see these cards going ^^.