This is a card i had made for a fanfic and wanted y'all's opinion on it

[SpiritFoxAlf]

Witchcrafter Caomhnoir LV5 Dark

Spellcaster/Effect

If a Monster or Spell targets a Witchcrafter Monster you control (Quick Effect): You can discard a spell, and if you do, change that target to "Witchcrafter Caomhnoir" instead. When this card becomes the target of a card effect (Quick Effect): You may discard a Spell, and if you do, counter that Effect. You can only use each effect of "Witchcrafter Caomhnoir" once per turn.

ATK 500, DEF 2000

[Noah akabane]

I like it.It really helps that it's basically a negate though the cost is quite annoying and also the fact that it doesn't work against traps other than that it's a good card.

[SpiritFoxAlf]

Yeah, I understand what you mean. It's just supposed to fit the Archetype it was built for.

[Noah akabane]

You do have a point there.Also what Is the name of the fanfiction and what site Is it on I might read it since I enjoy a good Yu-Gi-Oh fanfiction and I'm working on one myself.

Edited May 12 by Noah akabane

[SpiritFoxAlf]

I haven't started writing it yet, but I'll get back to you when I have.

[Luna Otto]

Interesting Card

[Messoras]

Hey there,

We have another bold attempt of a target deflecting ability, as I see :)

I always loved the idea of changing targets for effects, as cards like "Deflecting Swat" or "Bolt Bend" do in MTG. The problem with effects like these is the difference between a chain in Yugioh and the stack in MTG. As soon as you start resolving a chain in Yugioh, it keeps resolving until the last Chain Link has resolved, and any triggered abilities that would trigger during the chain form a new chain on resolution. So after resolving one Chain Link, there is no way to activate another card or Quick Effect. In MTG the game rules allow you to activate new instant speed spells and abilities whenever a spell or ability resolves on the stack.
(I assume you also play Magic, because you used "counter" instead of the Yugioh term "negate")

Keeping this in mind, a card like this, with two Quick Effects can only either deflect the target of an effect that targets a differnt Witchcrafter monster you control, OR negate an effect that directly targets it.

The way you worded the second effect

Quote

When this card becomes the target of a card effect (Quick Effect): You may discard a Spell, and if you do, counter that Effect.

is a good idea to solve the problem, since you could chain it to itself (if the first effect targets the card itself), BUT in that case it would negate it's own effect, as the window to interact with the activation of the effect that had its target changed is over.

To tackle this problem while staying inside the borders of the rulebook, we could use a continuous or lingering effect, which doesn't start a chain, instead of a Quick Effect. Those are effects as the burn effects on Trickstar cards, which squeeze inbetween Chain Links when they resolve. These kinds of effects are often difficult to word when they include more than just 1 very specific thing, but let me try finding something for you.

My attempt at the PSCT for this:

Quote

When your opponent targets exactly 1 "Witchcrafter" monster you control (and no other cards) with a card or effect, if this card would be an appropriate target (Quick Effect): You can discard 1 Spell; that effect now targets this card. You can negate any card or effect, that targets this 1 card. You can only use each effect of "Witchcrafter Caomhnoir" once per turn.

I used these official cards as reference:
- Shift
- Cerulean Skyfire
- World Legacy's Secret
- Chaos Command Magician

What I've changed:
- The redirection effect now checks if the card is an appropriate target (so we don't run into ruling issues like trying to attach materials to a non Xyz Monster or stuff like that)
- The negation effect now doesn't start a chain (when it's time to resolve the opponent's spell, you can then declare that you want to negate the effect with your continuous effect), also it doesn't discard a Spell for cost

I know you actually wanted to discard another Spell as cost for the negation effect, but I haven't found any recent Konami cards that use cost in Continuous effects. If you just want to discard another Spell, you could use something like "Once per turn, you can negate any card or effect that targets this 1 card, also discard 1 Spell." This would discard the Spell as part of an effect, not a cost, but I don't think that that is relevant for Witchcrafter Spells.
But I don't even think that that's necessary, as this is already a Level 5 monster with no easy way of cheating it out on its own, so a version that doesn't discard another card for negating the effect, doesn't seem to strong.

I love creative challenges like this one. It's a fun gameplay mechanic and I like the overall feel of the card. 

Sorry for the wall of text, I hope I could hep.

Greets,
Messoras

Edited May 28 by Messoras

[SpiritFoxAlf]

So would it be better to say

"Your opponent cannot target any other Witchcrafter Monsters but 'Witchcrafter Caomhnoir' with card effects. Once per turn: When this card becomes the target of a card effect (Quick Effect): You may discard a Spell, and if you do, counter that Effect."?

Edited June 9 by SpiritFoxAlf

[SpiritFoxAlf]

[Messoras]

This version is much easier to handle and honestly works absolutely fine aswell. Even though it's less experimental, I actually prefer it this way, as it is much tidier and easier to understand.
Here's a small PSCT fix for you:
Discarding a Spell as cost:
 

Quote

You opponent cannot target other "Witchcrafter" monsters you control with card effects. When a card or effect is activated that targets this face-up card on the field (Quick Effect): You can discard 1 Spell; negate that effect.

 

Discarding a Spell as part of the effect:
 

Quote

You opponent cannot target other "Witchcrafter" monsters you control with card effects. When a card or effect is activated that targets this face-up card on the field (Quick Effect): You can discard 1 Spell, and if you do, negate that effect.

Greets,
Messoras

Edited June 10 by Messoras

[SpiritFoxAlf]

Your opponent cannot target other "Witchcrafter" monsters you control with card effects. Once per turn: When this card becomes the target of a card effect (Quick Effect): You can discard 1 Spell; negate that effect. (Quick Effect): You can put any number of Spells with different names from your Deck in your Graveyard, and if you do, your battling monster gains 1000 ATK/DEF for each card revealed until the end of this turn; you can use this effect of "Witchcrafter Caomhnoir" only once per turn.

I wanted to have a soft, once per turn, and a hard, once per turn.

Edited June 10 by SpiritFoxAlf