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Hey guys, it's Thar.


Stormtrout

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So, first off... mods: Yes, I made an alt, and I'm aware of the consequences. So feel free to ban this account as well as the IP, but please don't erase this message.

 

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So I'm sure you're all aware I was permabanned a couple months ago for posting porn. What happened was someone got annoying on Discord and I kept telling him to stop, which got someone mad at me for being just as annoying and it made me hate myself, so I left. Upon realizing what I did, I asked to be invited back and they said no. At that point, everything I felt about not feeling needed in this community finally swelled up and I did what I thought was necessary to finally break the bond that kept me here.

 

Apparently I was wrong. Despite my efforts to keep my distance, I couldn't just leave. I tried begging, ranting, even threatening to kill myself to be let back in, but it was all pointless. Over time I've gotten less persistent and started moving on to other things, but part of me still wanted a second chance. Eventually I caved and made this alternate account (which I didn't think would work knowing the account maker was funked at one point, but I guess that makes little difference now.) I thought I could start anew and play amnesia to come across as a new member, but seeing as I can neither be myself nor be recognized as myself, there's just no point.

 

I'm torn. I really am. What I did was inexcusable but it all happened way too fast. I've been a member here for almost a decade now and I've been an active one for almost half of one, the latter being the one thing in my life that made me feel like a part of a community in my time of isolation and depression. To have that all torn away indefinitely over some drunken post of a porn pic that required less than a second of thought to not do? Words cannot describe it.

 

However, part of me is thankful, not only because I have a legitimate reason to stay away, but with all this hate towards the mods, banning me is a sign that they were doing their jobs right. When I posted that pic, I wasn't thinking straight and the state I was in at the time made things too unpredictable to trust even myself with. They did what they had to do. For that, I hope everyone who thinks mods are just emotionless robots with no sympathy for you all can look at them as people for once, people who go out of their way to keep a forum from becoming a cesspool for offenders to ruin it for everyone.

 

With all that aside, I really hope I can take this chance to say this last goodbye. I realized there was a funeral made for me, which is pretty funny, but considering it all happened so quickly, I've had the time to think about it and I'm finally at peace with letting this place go. Seriously you guys, I can't thank you enough for letting me be a part of this community for the past several years. Sucks that it all had to end this way, but there's nothing else to do but move on and not let this eat away at me. If you wanna keep in touch, I have Skype and Discord (and Steam, if any of you communicate through that.) I know this wasn't the best way to get this through, but I didn't just wanna disappear with a loaded conscience. Again, thank you all and I hope you have a wonderful day!

 

-Matt Lothe

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Sorry friend, didn't mean to offend. Things are pretty busy for me outside of YCM, I did plan on responding to your email but when I found out there was a problem with registration I put that at the highest priority. Like I said, I'm not interested in selling the site or transferring ownership. I can bucket my time to fixing issues / upgrading functionality about once every couple weeks. If you'd like to be in charge of aggregating issues and highest priority items and then emailing me occasionally, I will do my best to keep up communication and keep things rolling. How does that sound?

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