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Terrible Jokes


Lyfe.

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What's the difference between a dead dog and a dead Mexican lying in the middle of the street?

The dog has brake marks in front of it.

 

 

Why do Mexicans have big noses?

So they have something to pick in the winter

 

 

How do you blind an Asian?

Put a steering wheel in front of him

 

What do you name a retarded Asian?

Som Ting Wong


My wife was yelling at me. Yea' date=' can you believe it? She said I never tell her how much I love her anymore.

I didn't want to disappoint her.

[/quote']

 

I dun get it.

 

...

I didn't want to disappoint her by telling her how much I loved her...

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How did Germany take over Poland?

They marched in backwards and Poland thought they were leaving.

 

How do you sink a Pollock submarine?

Knock on the hatch.

 

 

Why do you throw a rock at a Mexican on a bike?

To get your bike back

Why do you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike?

To get your slave back

 

 

A white American, a black American, a white Canadian, and a white European are all riding horses out in the desert. The Canadian takes out a bottle of wine, and says, "In my country, ey, the wine is plentiful and the bottles are cheap." He then takes the bottle, stands it up on a cactus and shoots it. So the European takes out a bottle of bourbon, drinks it up, and says, "In my country, the liquor is plentiful and the bottles are cheap," and he then stands it up on a cactus and shoots it. The white American then takes out a can of beer, drinks it up, puts it in his saddlebag and shoots the black guy and the Canadian guy. He nods to the horrified European guy and says, "obviously you don't know this, but where I come from blacks and Canadians are plentiful but cans are worth something"


Epic win joke:

 

A Paki and a Black guy jump from a cliff at the same time who wins?

Society

 

A magic fairy greets all an American, An African American, and a Mexican. She says because there is three of them, they each get one wish. So the Black guy says, "I wish that all African Americans would be returned to Africa where they can live happily in their own country." And the Fairy instantly makes it true. Then the Mexican says, " I wish that all the Mexicans in America would be returned to their homeland of Mexico where they can live good, happy lives." With a wave of her wand the fairy makes it true instantly. Then she asks the American what he wants, and he says, "All the Africans are back in Africa?" And the Fairy replies, "Yes." And he says, "and all the Mexicans are back in Mexico?" and the Fairy says yes again. "OK," says the American, "I'll just have a Coke."


A Jewish boy comes home from school and tells his mother he’s been given a part in the school play.

“Wonderful. What part is it?”

The boy says, “I play the part of the Jewish husband.”

The mother scowls and says, “Go back and tell the teacher you want a speaking part.”

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What is blue and yellow and found at the bottom of a pool?

A baby with slashed floaties.

 

What is green-black and yellow and found at the bottom of a pool?

The same baby three weeks later.

 

What's red and yellow and floats on top of the pool?

Floaties with a slashed baby

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Why did the baby cross the road?

It was stapled to the chicken.

 

 

What has 4 legs and one arm?

A Doberman on a children's playground!

 

 

What is worse than a dead baby in a garbage can?

Ten dead babies in a garbage can.

 

What is worse than 10 dead babies in a garbage can?

One dead baby in a ten garbage cans.

 

What's red and lies in all four corners of the room?

A baby that's been playing with a chainsaw.

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What's the difference between me and Lust?

One's Bi' date=' and the other's a [b']girl[/b]. XD

 

How many computers does it take to screw a lightbulb in?

None- They can't!

 

I feel really low now... XD

 

=D No. Never.

 

I told my mother I may get banned.

 

She asked in a very mad mood, "Is it because you're posting something nasty?!"

 

I replied, "Nope, but I hope someone does."

 

then I remembered that J-Max was banned.

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What's the difference between me and Lust?

One's Bi' date=' and the other's a [b']girl[/b]. XD

 

How many computers does it take to screw a lightbulb in?

None- They can't!

 

I feel really low now... XD

 

=D No. Never.

 

I told my mother I may get banned.

 

She asked in a very mad mood, "Is it because you're posting something nasty?!"

 

I replied, "Nope, but I hope someone does."

 

 

then I remembered that J-Max was banned.

 

19/6/10

 

Never forget.

 

How many dead babies does it take to change a tire?

Two, one to prop up the car and one to replace it incase it explodes.

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What's the difference between me and Lust?

One's Bi' date=' and the other's a [b']girl[/b]. XD

 

How many computers does it take to screw a lightbulb in?

None- They can't!

 

I feel really low now... XD

 

=D No. Never.

 

I told my mother I may get banned.

 

She asked in a very mad mood, "Is it because you're posting something nasty?!"

 

I replied, "Nope, but I hope someone does."

 

 

then I remembered that J-Max was banned.

 

19/6/10

 

Never forget.

 

 

How many dead babies does it take to change a tire?

Two, one to prop up the car and one to replace it incase it explodes.

 

What makes it so bad, they didn't delete the picture that he posted. =D

I know the Link. :P

 

@Bold: LOL

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What's the difference between me and Lust?

One's Bi' date=' and the other's a [b']girl[/b]. XD

 

How many computers does it take to screw a lightbulb in?

None- They can't!

 

I feel really low now... XD

 

=D No. Never.

 

I told my mother I may get banned.

 

She asked in a very mad mood, "Is it because you're posting something nasty?!"

 

I replied, "Nope, but I hope someone does."

 

 

then I remembered that J-Max was banned.

 

19/6/10

 

Never forget.

 

 

How many dead babies does it take to change a tire?

Two, one to prop up the car and one to replace it incase it explodes.

 

What makes it so bad, they didn't delete the picture that he posted. =D

I know the Link. :P

 

@Bold: LOL

 

LINK NAO

What's more fun than strapping a baby to a clothesline and then spinning it around at 200km/h?

Stopping it with a shovel.

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What's the difference between me and Lust?

One's Bi' date=' and the other's a [b']girl[/b]. XD

 

How many computers does it take to screw a lightbulb in?

None- They can't!

 

I feel really low now... XD

 

=D No. Never.

 

I told my mother I may get banned.

 

She asked in a very mad mood, "Is it because you're posting something nasty?!"

 

I replied, "Nope, but I hope someone does."

 

 

then I remembered that J-Max was banned.

 

19/6/10

 

Never forget.

 

 

How many dead babies does it take to change a tire?

Two, one to prop up the car and one to replace it incase it explodes.

 

What makes it so bad, they didn't delete the picture that he posted. =D

I know the Link. :P

 

@Bold: LOL

 

LINK NAO

What's more fun than strapping a baby to a clothesline and then spinning it around at 200km/h?

Stopping it with a shovel.

 

http://forum.yugiohcardmaker.net/thread-206679-post-4261164.html#pid4261164

 

=D

But baby jokes aren't funneh.

That's Animal Abuse.

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What's the difference between me and Lust?

One's Bi' date=' and the other's a [b']girl[/b]. XD

 

How many computers does it take to screw a lightbulb in?

None- They can't!

 

I feel really low now... XD

 

=D No. Never.

 

I told my mother I may get banned.

 

She asked in a very mad mood, "Is it because you're posting something nasty?!"

 

I replied, "Nope, but I hope someone does."

 

 

then I remembered that J-Max was banned.

 

19/6/10

 

Never forget.

 

 

How many dead babies does it take to change a tire?

Two, one to prop up the car and one to replace it incase it explodes.

 

What makes it so bad, they didn't delete the picture that he posted. =D

I know the Link. :P

 

@Bold: LOL

 

LINK NAO

What's more fun than strapping a baby to a clothesline and then spinning it around at 200km/h?

Stopping it with a shovel.

 

http://forum.yugiohcardmaker.net/thread-206679-post-4261164.html#pid4261164

 

=D

But baby jokes aren't funneh.

That's Animal Abuse.

 

May. I'd Mega Pound her if you know what I mean!

 

What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies?

You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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What's the difference between me and Lust?

One's Bi' date=' and the other's a [b']girl[/b]. XD

 

How many computers does it take to screw a lightbulb in?

None- They can't!

 

I feel really low now... XD

 

=D No. Never.

 

I told my mother I may get banned.

 

She asked in a very mad mood, "Is it because you're posting something nasty?!"

 

I replied, "Nope, but I hope someone does."

 

 

then I remembered that J-Max was banned.

 

19/6/10

 

Never forget.

 

 

How many dead babies does it take to change a tire?

Two, one to prop up the car and one to replace it incase it explodes.

 

What makes it so bad, they didn't delete the picture that he posted. =D

I know the Link. :P

 

@Bold: LOL

 

LINK NAO

What's more fun than strapping a baby to a clothesline and then spinning it around at 200km/h?

Stopping it with a shovel.

 

http://forum.yugiohcardmaker.net/thread-206679-post-4261164.html#pid4261164

 

=D

But baby jokes aren't funneh.

That's Animal Abuse.

 

May. I'd Mega Pound her if you know what I mean!

 

What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies?

You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

 

Bi and desperate?

 

14,500.

 

This means in the past 2 1/2 days, I've made 700 posts. :D

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What's the difference between me and Lust?

One's Bi' date=' and the other's a [b']girl[/b]. XD

 

How many computers does it take to screw a lightbulb in?

None- They can't!

 

I feel really low now... XD

 

=D No. Never.

 

I told my mother I may get banned.

 

She asked in a very mad mood, "Is it because you're posting something nasty?!"

 

I replied, "Nope, but I hope someone does."

 

 

then I remembered that J-Max was banned.

 

19/6/10

 

Never forget.

 

 

How many dead babies does it take to change a tire?

Two, one to prop up the car and one to replace it incase it explodes.

 

What makes it so bad, they didn't delete the picture that he posted. =D

I know the Link. :P

 

@Bold: LOL

 

LINK NAO

What's more fun than strapping a baby to a clothesline and then spinning it around at 200km/h?

Stopping it with a shovel.

 

http://forum.yugiohcardmaker.net/thread-206679-post-4261164.html#pid4261164

 

=D

But baby jokes aren't funneh.

That's Animal Abuse.

 

May. I'd Mega Pound her if you know what I mean!

 

What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies?

You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

 

Bi and desperate?

 

14,500.

 

This means in the past 2 1/2 days, I've made 700 posts. :D

 

DONT JUDGE ME

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What's the difference between me and Lust?

One's Bi' date=' and the other's a [b']girl[/b]. XD

 

How many computers does it take to screw a lightbulb in?

None- They can't!

 

I feel really low now... XD

 

=D No. Never.

 

I told my mother I may get banned.

 

She asked in a very mad mood, "Is it because you're posting something nasty?!"

 

I replied, "Nope, but I hope someone does."

 

 

then I remembered that J-Max was banned.

 

19/6/10

 

Never forget.

 

 

How many dead babies does it take to change a tire?

Two, one to prop up the car and one to replace it incase it explodes.

 

What makes it so bad, they didn't delete the picture that he posted. =D

I know the Link. :P

 

@Bold: LOL

 

LINK NAO

What's more fun than strapping a baby to a clothesline and then spinning it around at 200km/h?

Stopping it with a shovel.

 

http://forum.yugiohcardmaker.net/thread-206679-post-4261164.html#pid4261164

 

=D

But baby jokes aren't funneh.

That's Animal Abuse.

 

May. I'd Mega Pound her if you know what I mean!

 

What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies?

You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

 

Bi and desperate?

 

14,500.

 

This means in the past 2 1/2 days, I've made 700 posts. :D

 

DONT JUDGE ME

 

Too late, baby <3

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