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Yu-Gi-Oh! GX! The Fan Fic (UPDATE: Episode 45 Started! Here's where it gets serious.)

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This is a story I got the idea for a few days ago. I decided, 'hey, yugioh GX is stupid. Let's ridicule it' and asked KaiKae to join me. He agreed to do every other episode, until after episode 2. So, here it is. Also I decide on a theme song. It's Japanese, perfect for even a fake anime, and it sounds cool. So, here you go.

[url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PmSKxQ2ESdg]Opening Song: "Wings Please" I think, from I guess the anime "K-ON!" I really don't know. Further study would be appreciated. I chose it because it sounds awesome and reminds me of going to school on an island with a volcano on it. And trading cards.[/url]
[url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sBvyF7up67E]Ending Song: "Kiri Tori Sen" from the [Zan] Sayonara, Zetsubou-Sensei Character Album. It sounds cool, so it's here. Somehow, it reminds me a lot of Syrus, I guess.[/url]

For the halibut, here are songs that you can use for the second half of the season.
[url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9vSjan46M5c]Opening Song: "Velonica" by Aqua Timez from Bleach. Yeah, overrated, but then again nobody gives me any suggestions. I like it because it makes me feel like 'kay, we just did something tough, and it's only getting harder from here. anybody who wants to leave can leave. everyone's staying? good. let's go.'[/url]
[url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkzYhlRWzQQ]Ending Song: "Mother Earth" from the Otonoishi album. I enjoy this song due to its simplicity (well, maybe?) and catchiness. It's a remix from a popular game series! Can YOU guess what it is?[/url]

[url=http://forum.yugiohcardmaker.net/thread-147569-post-3855195.html#pid3855195]Basically every other episode can be found here.[/url]
[spoiler=Episode One: The Next King of Games (Redone as of 6/17/10)]
Yu-Gi-Oh! GX: The Fan Fic
Episode One, The Next King of Games

We begin our first episode inside of a large, Domino City High School by the name of ‘Sakuragi Hanamichi High’. Inside, several once-middle school students were traversing the halls at their own leisurely pace, looking for the classrooms in which they’d be taking their entrance exams. One important boy in particular had his own circle of friends surrounding him, all eager for their new lives as high school students.

The kid in question had brown hair, odd for many traditional Japanese anime characters, and was strutting the halls with his large male friend, his cool, thinner male friend, and his shy female friend who seemed to be interested in him. “Jay-man, we’re finally here!” the large boy announced! “High school!”
“Remember when we were just little kids and we always dreamed about becoming cool high school ‘yankees’?” the thinner boy chuckled.
“Oh yeah, yo, that’s because we read ‘Chagecha’!” the kid recalled. “What a horrible idea! That story was cancelled after only eight chapters, right?”
“Oh, remember when we followed that yakuza guy last year, Jaden?” the thinner guy laughed. “We totally kicked is ass and saved those orphaned puppies!”
“Oh yeah! I remember, yo! We’ve had so many great adventures in our school years,” Jaden wistfully remembered. He turned to his female friend, who hadn’t said anything yet. “Hey, what’s up? You haven’t said anything yet.”
“O-oh,” the girl gasped. “Sorry, I was just thinking…”
“’Bout what, yo?” Jaden asked.
“Well… weren’t you going to go to those Duel Academy entrance exams today?” the girl asked.
“… OHCRAPYOU’RERIGHT!!” Jaden leaped out of the nearest window and ran off.
“AAAAAAW!!” the big guy wailed! “I KNEW THAT STUPID DUEL MONSTERS WOULD TEAR OUR FRIENDSHIP APAAAART!!”
“How COULD you?! We agreed we’d keep that from him, woman!!” The thinner kid punched the girl in the face.
“OH!” She fell onto another student’s feet, causing him to fall in turn. “You hit me… then It’s a good thing I brought THIS baby today!” She pulled out her lucky tommy gun and unleashed hell within the highly-populated school house.

Jaden bolted through the city as fast as he could, leaping over traffic, bounding over park benches and slamming into trash cans. As he dashed through the Domino City Park district, he began checking out his backpack. “Alright, I got my deck, I got my gear, and I ain’t goin’ to no REAL school! That’s because I like card games! Sadly I’m late for my entrance exams because my old friends I’ve known since elementary school tried taking me to an actual high school entrance exam! Ha ha, screw them, I’m going to Duel Academy! Wait, why’m I saying all this?”
“That’s one WEEEIRD kid,” an onlooker chuckled to himself.

Ahead of Jaden walked a mysterious previous main character with legendarily spiky hair! Somehow, he and his Yuginess didn’t actually notice Jaden heading towards him at a breakneck pace! “OH NO YO!” Jaden screamed, still running. “LOOK OUT, YO!!” Yugi looked to his left. “NO, BEHIND YOU!” Yugi looked to his right. “NO, RIGHT HERE!!” Yugi looked upward. “WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU?!?! Ow,” he screamed, slamming into the man. “Oh, sorry ‘bout that,” Jaden apologized, helping the man up. “… Sorry you’re such an IDIOT!” Jaden pushed the Yugi over again.
“Ow! Why did you do that?” the Yugey man whined.
“’Cause you didn’t just get out of the way while I kept yellin’ an’ screamin’ an’… screw it, I’m late for the DUEL ACADEMY ENTRANCE EXAMS!!”

Something clicked within the Yugi-like man. “Wait. Did you just say, ‘Duel Academy’?” he asked.
“Hellz yeah!”
“By that, do you mean the school where you duel?”
“The COOL school where you duel!” Jaden corrected. “Yeah, where ELSE could I be headin’ toward like this?”
“I don’t know, but have a FREE Duel Monsters card!” Yugi invited, handing Jaden a free card of some sort. The boy snatched it up.
“Cool! But why?”
“Because you bumped into me, which told me to believe in you and your [u]incredible[/u] Dueling adventures that are sure to follow!”
“Oh!” Jaden bowed in appreciation. “Thanks! I’ll be sure to bump into more people from now on!” Jaden ran off as Yugi dusted himself off. As the happy idiot boy ran off, that man did the COOLEST THING EVER… he gave Jaden a THUMBS-UP as he walked away.
“WAHAHAHAHA, FAREWELL, YOUNG DUELIST!! HA HA HA…” Yugi was suddenly run over by a bicyclist.
“… Oh, that guy was Yugi,” Jaden realized. “He’s a lot lamer than I thought. Well, I guess I should take a peek at this here Duel Monster card, yo!” With a small smile, he looked at the card he’d been given. It was… a Kuriboh. With wings. It was called ‘Winged Kuriboh’. “… I hate you, Yugi,” Jaden decided. “A Kuriboh with wings?! That’s insultin’, man! WHAT’RE YOU TRYIN’ TO SAY, BASTARD?!”
“OOH,” the Kuriboh cooed.
“… OH MY GOSH, MY CARD JUST TALKED TO ME!!” Jaden slipped the card into his handy-dandy deck box and began running back off to the task at hand. “Who cares, ‘cause I gotta go to school!”
“LOSER!” accused a man.
“Hey,” Jaden reasoned, “I can’t become the next KING OF GAMES if I’m LATE to the games!”
“BOO,” someone said.

Meanwhile, several miles away, inside of a large dome-shaped building…
Several nerdy kids were running around within a massive arena, constructed just so that kids can play card games and adults could watch. Something was wrong with that picture, though. “[i]All people who have won their entrance duels, please escort yourself to the left,[/i]” an intercom buzzed, “[i]and those of you who have lost, thus humiliating yourself against a badly-made deck and forever tainting your memory with the stench of failure, and the rejection of a school that teaches children to play simple card games… better luck next year. Or not, because I really hate you all.[/i]” A sexually-ambiguous person in a blue duelist uniform, complete with frills, was seated around several uncomfortable teachers up in the stands, sternly watching today’s youth fail at card games with intense intent. “And have fun at the Kaibaland-sponsored Duel Academy, mwee-hee-hee-hee,” it cackled.
“I despise you and also fear you,” a fellow teacher told it.

“Now, I summon Leghul,” a dueling proctor announced within the massive Duel Pit. “and now I will attack you directly! Bug Bite!” A large, spiky centipede flew out of a card and attacked a short, sad-looking kid with blue hair and glasses!
“Ow,” he recoiled. (Boy: 4000 Life Points -> 3700 Life Points) [i]I wish I was already enrolled so that I didn’t have to deal with these crappy, freaky cards, the boy thought. I also wish I knew why I had to duel this idiot, even a beginner could beat him. Oh yeah, and I wish I stayed home, too. I’m depressed with life in general. Hey, I bet I just declared what my character is all about! That’s not good…[/i]
“[i]All of you terrible kids who can’t play this game who also have NOT reported for a duel, please shame yourself now,[/i]” the intercom asked.

Meanwhile, outside the building, within the parking lot of destiny…
“Alright ladies, that’s it,” said a man of some sort with two women companions, all of which who worked for the school and such. “Mark all the no-shows ‘no-shows’, ha ha. I’m so funny.”
“WAIT, Y’ALL!!” cried a very unfitting voice! It startled everyone present into looking at the kid who had just climbed up the railing around the parking lot. “I’m no no-show, yo! You can count JADEN YUKI IN!!”
“… Like I said, mark ‘em. NOW,” the man stressed

**********

A few minutes and some intense negotiations (possibly street brawls) later, Jaden appeared next to the depressed blue-haired kid, cracking his shoulder. “Dislocated shoulders hurt, man… Oh boy, look at ‘em go!” he excitedly shouted, looking toward the duels down below.
“I activate Hammer Shot, destroying the monster on the field with the most Attack Points!” a boy said, just after summoning his Dark Magician. A large hammer fall and crushed his monster. “Aw, man, I really gotta stop doing that.”
“Oh, you mean that poor kid over there?” the blue-hair guy asked.
“No, I’m talkin’ ‘bout THAT poor kid!” And lo, Jaden pointed to a cool kid with swept-back grayish hair and a decidedly British voice. On his field was a guy who had a big raidin’ spear who somehow emanated the word ‘Vorse’. (Vorse Raider: 1900 Attack Points) His dueling, proctoring opponent with massive sunglasses had some sort of guard holding a big shield, along with a movable fortress constructed out of a golem covered in gears. (Big Shield Gardna: 2300 Defense Points, Gear Golem the Moving Fortress: 2200 Defense Points)
“Alright, new guy. Multiple-choice,” the man yelled, “You’ve got two monsters starin’ you down. Do you A: Throw in the towel, B: Beg for mercy, or C: Run home to momma?”
“I’ll take D;” the kid answered in his thick, British accent, “You’re an idiot!” He flipped up his Trap card: RING OF DESTRUCTION!! Basically the card’s art showcased a collar covered in grenades.
“A Trap?! IT CAN’T BE!!” the proctor screamed, in fear for his own life!!
“Yes, this card destroys one monster on the field, causing us both to take damage equal to the monster’s Attack Points!” the boy explained, quite confident in his success. The grenade ring appeared magically around his own monster’s neck.
(Shady Proctor: 4 Life Points) “OH NOOOOO!!” the proctor screamed! “But, wait, are you sure you really wanna do that?”
(Cool Kid: 1900 Life Points, Vorse Raider: 1900 Attack Points) “I’m DEAD-SURE.”
“You don’t say that, it’s dead-WRONG.”
“I KNOW WHAT I MEAN!!” The grenade ring then detonated, resulting in a stylish explosion of some sort. (Dumb Kid: 0 Life Points, Shady Proctor: 0 Life Points. TIE)

Up in the stands, a kid with noticeably extreme swoopy-yet-spiky black hair was sitting with his two groupies. “Wow, that guy’s purdy good, don’cha think Chazz, I reckon?” asked one in his offensively ‘hillbilly-ish’ voice, whilst having bluish hair swept over his shoulder and simultaneously having neat spectacles.
“Shut up, Billy Hills,” the Chazz kid groaned, “your accent is offensive to hill-folk everywhere!”
“Guess the rumors about that Bastion kid bein’ some kinda whizz-kid are true, huh, Chazz, huh?” his other groupie asked, complete with tallness, toughness, a large nose, blank expression and hair not unlike a freshly-cut lawn.
“Shut UP, Deep-Voice Dobbson,” Chazz growled, “your accent is offensive to deep-voiced men and women everywhere!”
“Boy, I reckon yer’ the best friend ever!”
“It sure is nice ‘ta sit with you, huh, Chazz, huh!”
“SHUT UP!! YOUR VOICES ARE IN[b]FU[/b]RIATING!!”

“Woo-ee,” Jaden whistled, “that kid sure was an idiot.”
“I heard that he came from a dueling prep school,” the sad blue-haired kid remembered, “and his name’s Bastion Misawa. He got the highest score on the written test, but he’s still stupid and rarely wins, just having tie matches. We should stay away from him. By the way, I’m Syrus Truesdale. I barely passed the written test, mostly because I couldn’t get any sleep last night. I was too scared about the rapidly rising population of the earth, and all the horrors we’ll face. I learned it from one of those depressing PBS ‘Nova’ specials and…”
“So what? You’re in like Flynn, mah min! And by that I mean ‘man’! You’re already in ‘da school, fool!” Jaden rhymed. “I will too, after the duel, so don’t be cruel! Ha ha, rhymin’ like that should be a crime… I mean rhyme, ‘cause ‘rhymin’ and ‘crime’ don’t rhyme…”
“While you were trying to rhyme, the last applicant just finished up and failed,” Syrus insisted, pointing down into the Duel Pit.
“[i]WAAAAGH, I FAAAAAILED!![/i]”
“OH CRAP, HE [b]DID[/b] FAIL!!” Jaden screamed!

Meanwhile, with the teachers…
“Looks like we have a pretty good crop this year,” one guy said to another.
“Yes indeed-y,” his accomplice answered in a freakily nasally tone.
“AAH! What happened to our voice?!”
“I DON’T KNOW!! HELP ME!!”
A guy in a cool suit walked over to the really scary teacher and told it, “Sorry to interrupt, but one last applicant is really freaking out over there, Mr. Crowler.”
It turned around and glared at him. “Did you just call me ‘Mister?’” it asked.
“Oh, sorry, I’m new here. But really, that kid’s goin’ crazy.” The man pointed to Jaden, across the stadium.
“WAAAAAAAAGH I GOTTA DUEEEEEL!!” Jaden screamed, irritating everyone present.
“Yes, I’ve noticed him…” Crowler noted, “BUT YOU MUST NEVER CALL ME ‘MISTER’!! I! AM! A! WOMAN!!”
“Oh, well I’m new here,” the man repeated, shaking uncontrollably.
“Well,” it growled, grimacing at him not two inches away from his face, “next time you should [b]probably[/b] call me [b]‘Doctor’[/b]. I didn’t spend all that time at Kaibaland Dueling College to be [b]MOCKED[/b].”
“Uh… uh…” the man whimpered.
“Either way,” Crowler sighed, getting back on track, “just tell that truant child to come back NEXT year like everyone else that stupid.”
“Uh… UH… UWAAAAAAAH!!” the new teacher cried, racing away as fast as he could.
“I don’t think he’s coming back,” the nasally man said.
“Come now, Ms. Crowler,” an old man goaded, “I want to see just one more duel before I die today of old age.”
“He’s serious, he’s ‘bout to croak any moment now,” another teacher recognized. “His eyes are REALLY dilated.”
“Yeah,” Mr. Nasal added, “The boy was only a LITTLE late. Give’m a chance.”
“GRR!! NO!” Crowler exploded! “I have no leniency for slackers!!” Suddenly, its Duel Phone™ beeped inside of its pocket. “And who might this be?” Crowler asked, placing the phone to its ear.
“[i]It’s Chancellor Shepherd here,[/i]” a man with a perfect police chief voice told.
“Ah, yes, what is it?”
“I just wanted to conveniently call now to make sure that you don’t do what you did last year for cutting a third of the applicants for calling you ‘Mister’. And… that’s it.” He hung up.
“That was oddly convenient,” Crowler growled. “Meh, I’ll give the slacker-boy a chance.”
“But wait,” the nasally man asked, “Which proctor should duel him, and with which crappy deck?”
“If you promise to never speak again, [u]I’ll[/u] do it. Deal?” Crowler offered.
“My voice isn’t my fault,” the man sniffed.

Jaden and Syrus both approached Bastion Misawa, the tie-match kid you’ve possibly forgotten about by now, thanks to the adventures of Crowler. Bastion ad just sat down onto one of the thousands of bleachers provided when Jaden popped up next to him, proclaiming “TIGHT duel, Bastion!”
“WAGH!!” Bastion screamed, caught off-guard by the sudden intrusion! “Uh, thanks.”
“Looks like you might be the SECOND-worst Duelist here!” Jaden supposed.
“Huh?!”
Suddenly, the intercom started to bother everyone again! “[i]Jaden Yuki, please report to Duel Stadium Four, or whatever.[/i]”
“Go time, yo!” Jaden cheered! “Wish me luck, dudes!”
“W-wait,” Bastion begged, reaching out to Jaden, “if I’m the second-worst, then who’s the first?”
“I dunno. Do you know anybody who always LOSES their duels?” Jaden checked. At this, Bastion clammed up with both shame that nobody thought tie-matches to be cool, and amazement at the fact that there very well COULD be a boy who always lost… interesting…
“Woah,” Syrus remarked, “He shut him up in an instant! He’s GOT to be good. Or I could be wrong. And then he’d fail, and I’d have no friends to be with, again. Unless Bastion’s my friend.” Syrus turned to Bastion. “Hey Bastion, are you my friend?”
“Hell no.”
“Aw.”

Jaden strutted into the Duel Arena like a real jive turkey. He was going to have a Duel Monsters card game Duel against a Duelist teacher, who happened to ALSO be a Duelist itself. Crowler stood its place to the far-right of the box-like arena, giving off a look of disgust, aimed toward the weird kid. Its Duel Disk of choice looked like a scary sword that could kill people. It had bloodstains on it. “Okay, test time!” it yelled in an effeminate voice.
“WAUGH!!” Jaden howled! “Oh, it’s only an ugly lady, yo. Wait, is that any better…?”
“Ugh. So, son, your name?” Crowler scowled, scowling.
“Are you REALLY a lady?”
“Answer the question.”
“Jaden Yuki,” Jaden Yuki said.
“Well, Jaden [u]Yucky[/u],” Crowler said, smirking, “I’m Doctor Velian Crowler, Professor of Useless Card Game Techniques here at Duel Academia.”
“Oh, a Professor! And here I thought you were just some sort of ugly lady! Or are you both? OOH!”
“Grr…” it growled. “Your humor is terrible, Mr. [u]YUCKY[/u].”

“Well, Chazz,” Billy Hills mentioned, “now that he mentions it, he DOES kinda look like a she, I reckon!”
“That kid’s got SOME lip, tellin’ the truth to Crowler like that, right, huh, Chazz, huh?” Deep-Voice Dobbson asked.
“GRRRRR…” Chazz punched his friends in the faces! “SHUT YOUR FACES ABOUT HER!!” Chazz unintelligibly screamed. [i]Nobody talks about my mum like that…[/i]

Crowler tapped a weird deck-holding mechanism strapped to its chest and chanted, “Duel vest, on,” gracefully removing five cards from its deck.
“Hey, that’s pretty elegantly unnecessary, Ms. Crowler, but how do I get one of those mad-slick duel blazers?” Jaden asked, interested.
“Oh, it only takes an extreme amount of effort, extremely high marks, and… how do you children say it… Mad Dueling skills. Yes,” Crowler answered after much thought, “But of course, first you must GET into Duel Academy, and I’m here to make sure that won’t be happening!”
“Well hey, if I beat you, then I’ll show mah MAD Duelin’ skills!” Jaden figured! “Thanks for the head-start, teach!”
“Oh, I’m SO going to enjoy this,” Crowler groaned, internally bursting a blood vessel.
“DUEL!!” both parties exclaimed. (Jaden Yuki: 4000 Life Points, Velian Crowler: 4000 Life Points)

“HERE GOES!!” Jaden drew his starting hand with intense effort. His hand was made up of Elemental Hero Avian, Monster Reborn, Draining Shield, Hero Signal, Polymerization, and The Warrior Returning Alive, whatever THAT means. “Sweet, yo! I’m gonna summon Elemental Hero Avian in Defense Mode!”
“Hmph!” yelled a man in an embarrassing green winged jumpsuit, complete with a wimpy clawed glove, leaping onto the field. Crowler stared at it with a combination of disgust and hilarity. (Elemental Hero Avian: 1000 Attack Points)
“I’ll also [i]throw-down[/i] a [i]face-down,[/i]” Jaden snickered, setting his Draining Shield Trap card. What does THAT do, you may ask? Well, stay tuned!
“BOO,” someone said.
“Alright, get your game on—”
“BOO,” someone said.

“Yes, very good,” Crowler complimented (WITH LIES!!) “[i]Just don’t tell me what to do, child.[/i]”
“Say something?”
“No,” Crowler answered. “[i]Ha ha ha ha ha. Also, since I’m using my own deck as opposed to those infinitely useless test decks,[u]I’LL[/u] be calling [u]ALL[/u] the shots![/i]”
“Oh, that’s cool!”
“Shut up, Mr. Yucky.”Crowler drew its next card, adding a second Statue of the Wicked card into its hand, constructed of the aforementioned card, Confiscation, Heavy Storm, Ancient Gear Golem and Emes the Infinity, though to be fair the last one was there due to a lack of sense on the animator’s part. “[i]I’ll fail this little upstart and send him home,[/i]” Crowler reassured itself.
“Okay, whatever ‘ya say, teach!” Jaden laughed! “Man, she is SUCH a riot.” Crowler frowned.
“Well then, enough with the ‘[i]comedy[/i]’. I think I’ll start off nice and easy with my Spell card: Confiscation!” Crowler announced in a grandiose fashion. As it held the card up, an intense psychedelic background and accompanying guitar riff explained HOW dangerous this was!
“Okay, so what’s it do?” Jaden asked. (Crowler: 3000 Life Points) “Wow, you have such dumb cards, Ms. Crowler! That’s what makes you funny!”
“IDIOT!!” some guy yelled.
“What it does is give me the chance to peek at YOUR hand and toss one of YOUR cards into the GRAVEYARD!!” Crowler informed. Holograms of Jaden’s cards instantly floated in front of Crowler’s face with a rainbow-themed background for no reason. “Oh yes, I remember some of these cards from your dad.”
“When did you see my dad?!” Jaden yelled!
“Last night! Burned!” Crowler insulted!
“GAY JOKE!” somebody guessed.
“I’M NOT A MAN!!” Crowler screamed!
“Yeah, dude, she’s a SHE!!” Jaden proclaimed radically!
“YEAH, RIGHT!”
“Sure showed THAT sucka’!” Jaden believed.

[i]Why do I even bother making jokes if they always end up like this?[/i] Crowler asked itself, questioning its life and career choices. “Hmm,” Crowler thought loudly, getting back to the tast at hand, “Which card shall I banish? Eenie meenie miney you.” Crowler poked the hologram of Monster Reborn. “MONSTER REBORN TO THE GRAVEYARD!!” It blew up and the other cards faded, along with their hip digital background.
“Darn it! The picture exploded!” Jaden lamented! Then after one stern look from Crowler, Jaden got a clue. “Sorry, should’a told me,” Jaden apologized, sending his Spell card to the Graveyard.
“I DID ALREADY. My word, how have you SURVIVED this long, being so STUPID?!” Crowler wondered. “[i]Okay, Crowler, take a deep breath… control yourself…[/i] Alright then, on with the game. I’ll set two cards face-down onto the field.” Two large, face-down holograms of cards appeared. “Then I’ll activate Heavy Storm, destroying all Spell and Trap cards on the field!” A uge hurricane, filled with a few screaming guys, a house ripped from its foundation, and a delightful cow stormed the field, ripping away all Spell and Trap cards and eating them up. Which means you’ll never know what Draining Shield does or looks like.
“Whoopsie,” Jaden joked, “Didja forget you had two Traps?”
“Now now, you mustn’t speak out of turn, young one,” Crowler shushed.
“I ain’t in school yet, so you ain’t the boss o’ me, lady! Yet.” Suddenly, the field transformed into a dark, twisted holographic land filled with curly clouds! “WOAH! What’s up wit’ this, yo?!” Jaden screamed!
“NOTHING’S happening,” Crowler said sarcastically.
“Oh, that’s good—”
“NOT YET!!”
“AAH, OH NO! AHH!!”Two wiggly golden idols appeared, somewhat demon-snake-ish in appearance!

“AHHHHH!!” the audience shrieked! Over half of the newly-accepted kids, weak of heart and mind, ran away in fear, exiting the building, running back into town, going home, eating dinner, and going to sleep. OR DID THEY…? Nah, half of them were killed in the ensuing trampling.
“I’m too depressed to run,” Syrus sighed, shaking vigorously.
“Indeed,” Bastion sighed.

But Chazz and his buddies commented as well! “I reckon a card THAT strong COULDN’T be in one o’ the test decks, Crowler must be usin’ her own!” Billy Hills noticed.
“She already SAID that, you idiot! Why don’t you kill yourself?!” Chazz snapped.
“Yeah, this is already over, huh, Chazz? No applicant can hope to beat the deck of an expert like Ms. Crowler, huh, Chazz, huh?” Deep-Voice Dobbson reckoned.
“Shut up! Stop stating the obvious, you two! Go drown yourself in Kool-Aid!” Chazz growled.
“Yeah, it’s impossible, I reckon, don’cha think, Chazz?”
“Yeah, whadda ya think, Chazz, huh?”
I think that you should both just go do a double suicide and leave me alone!” Chazz yelled!
“That Crowler’s an idiot,” some large-breasted blonde girl in a blue uniform announced, “That boy has ‘Yu’ in his name. EVERYBODY knows about THAT trend. He’s practically invincible.”
“You’re too soft, Alexis.”
“What are you talking about, Zane?”
“I just hope we get a chance to see that legendary monster Crowler has stashed away in that deck of his,” an older teen boy with DARK-BLUE hair grunted.
“What does that have to with ANYTHING I just said?” Alexis asked, irritatedly.
“…” Zane glared at her silently.
[i]I so want to make love to him right now,[/i] Alexis thought, trembling with excitement.

Back in ‘da Duel Pit…
“Ready for your next lesson?” taunted Crowler, as its two golden snake-demons wiggled around like wild.
“You bet!” Jaden cheered. “I can’t REMEMBER the last time learning was THIS much fun! Except for Schoolhouse Rock, yo! Now THAT video series was OFF ‘da HOOK, y’all.”
“Hm, well, I AM quite an excellent teacher. And yet…” It held a single card high into the air, causing it so shine unbelievably bright and blind all students unlucky enough to stare directly at it without protection!!
“MY EEEEEEYES!!” some kids screeched!
“Now I sacrifice my two Wicked Statue Tokens to summon the [b]LEGENDARY[/b] Ancient Gear Golem!!” The two tokens exploded into flames for some reason as Crowler smacked its shining card onto the Duel Disk Blade! And lo, upon the field appeared a giant, ancient fighting robot, covered in epic rust! It was patterned after a gladiator for some reason.

“There it is,” Alexis realized, now surprised, “He really DOES have a legendary Super Rare card! Why we forgot about it, I don’t know, and it’s not all THAT special.”
“And I’d say we’re about to find out what just MAKES it so legendary,” the second of the blue-hairs smirked.
“It’s not legendary.”

And so, our hero Jaden stared up at the giant robot in an intense mixture of fear, excitement, and hunger for he had skipped his breakfast!!

(CURRENT FIELD:
Jaden: 4000 Life Points; Elemental Hero Avian, DEF Mode (1000)
Crowler: 3000 Life Points; Ancient Gear Golem, ATK Mode (3000))

[i]I really wish I hadn’t skipped out on breakfast this mornin’, dawg,[/i] Jaden worried.

TO BE CONCLUDED...

RIGHT NOW!

“Ho ho ho ho ho,” Crowler laughed, “I hope you’re not TOO scared of my Ancient Gear Golem!”
“Aw, no way!” Jaden disagreed! “I’ve ALWAYS wanted to take one of those on!”
“GASP!!” the audience collectively gasped!
“HE’S A MADMAN!!”
“I’m still blind from earlier. What’s happening?”
“Either Jaden’s brave or he’s an idiot,” Syrus moaned, “And if he’s brave he’ll be doing some stupid things throughout my school years, leading towards the deaths of everybody we hold dear, possibly thanks to a cosmic horror or stupid occurrence of the past, making no sense in the end. So I really, really just hope he’s just an idiot, don’t you, Bastion?”
“Who’re you again?” Bastion asked.

“He’s staring down that legendary rare monster like he doesn’t have a care in the world!” Zane exclaimed exasperatedly. “I guess the youth and inexperience have their use after all, huh Alexis?”
“What are you talking about, Zane?” Alexis asked. “He’s probably never even seen one of those before today. Look.” Alexis leaned out toward the Dueling masses down below. “HEY, HAVE YOU EVEN [i]HEARD[/i] OF ONE OF THOSE BEFORE?!”
“[i]Uh, no, actually I just wanted to look popular n’ fly![/i]” Jaden explained.
“Told you.”
“There won’t be much left of it to show after this,” Zane remarked.
“…” [i]Next time, I need to love for the mind, not for the delicious body,[/i] Alexis decided.

“WAAAAAHAHAHAHA!!” Crowler laughed, as if they had just eaten sugar! “MECHANIZED MELEE!!” The comically-oversized gears inside the golem whirred around, causing its large, single eye to GLOW!! It propelled its massive robot fist through the air and into Avian!
“Don’t worry, I’ve got’m!” Avian assured. Then he was completely crushed by the fist, which was twice the size of his own body. Whoops.

Meanwhile with Syrus…
“Aw, Jaden’s monster didn’t stand a chance! Its Defense Points were way too low! It was hopeless, man, HOPELESS!!”
“And it’s about to get worse if you don’t shut up, Syrus,” Bastion warned.
“So you DO know my name.”

After crashing through Avian’s crappy body, the golem’s fist continued to fly through the Duel Pit into Jaden! “AAAAAARGH, THE PAIN!!” he screamed, being hit! (Jaden: 2000 Life Points) “Stupid special ability causing damage to Defense Position monsters!” Jaden lowered his head down due to the intense ‘pain’ of the hologram.
“Don’t feel bad, kid,” Crowler consoled, “This is the top dueling school in the country! Some people…” Jaden looked up and smiled. “Oh, poop.”
“Hahahaha!” Jaden giggled (?!). “I’ve never been hit by a hologram like THAT before!”
“Wh…Bu…He… BUT I JUST HALVED YOUR LIFE POINTS, YOU FOOLISH FOOLY FOOL!!” Crowler shrieked! “CAN’T YOU STOP LAUGHING AT EVERYTHING?! You will NOT be allowed to make a MOCKERY of MY DECK!!”
“Just keep tellin’ yourself that,” Jaden sighed, drawing his next card.
“OOH,” his next card said.
“… WHATTHECRAP. AGAIN.” Jaden picked up the WINGED KURIBOH!! “Why do ALL my cards keep talking to me?! And by that, I just mean Kuriboh and Avian, yo. I’ll show YOU what I do to Kuribohs!”
But then, he remembered the immortal words of Yugi: [i]‘Remember to wash your hands before and after every meal.’[/i]
“Y’know, I’m starting to believe that m’self, Yugi,” Jaden muttered.
“OOH,” Winged Kuriboh said, somehow winking from within the card art.
“Ew. Don’t do that. I’m making you a living sacrifice to the giant death golem, alright?”
“OOH.”
“Good! I summon Winged Kuriboh, yo, in Attack Mode, yo!”
“OOH,” it said, being summoned. (Winged Kuriboh: 200 Defense Points)
“Next I’ll throw down one face-down,” Jaden rhymed, setting a card onto the field.
“BOO,” someone said.
“Now what do you think o’ me now, teach?” Jaden asked, winking to the audience.
“I think you’re the biggest idiot I’ve ever seen or heard of, kid. In fact, you’ve made me so angry that I won’t even feel great about beating you.” Crowler pointed to the winged mascot. “Golem, destroy.” The golem crushed Winged Kuriboh, just like Avian.
[i]Oh yeah, he’s dead![/i] Jaden thought victoriously.
“So, what’s wrong with your Duel Disk?” Crowler asked, confused. “The Life Point logo should have appeared by now, signifying your defeat.”
“Check it out.” Jaden pointed to the Golem, who was retracting its fist, rather than smacking Jaden violently. “The only saving grace of that damn Kuriboh is that the turn he’s destroyed, I take ZERO damage! Take ‘DAT!”
“THAT’S ALMOST AS BAD AS YOUR ACCENT!!” Crowler screamed, attempting to rip out its hair!

But hold on, because it’s time for another pointless scene with that Zane-and-Alexis-combo…
“I told you,” Alexis chuckled, “that ‘Yu’ guy’s goin’ places. He should thank his parents, because otherwise he’d have no talent.” Sadly for her, though, her friend/lover was paying too much attention to the duel to care. “Why do I bother…?”

“… Grr… fine. So your LAME little monster managed to save you this turn,” Crowler said, regaining composure, “But you won’t be so lucky next time!”
“Hold up, teach!” Teachers aren’t ALLOWED to say ‘lame’! It’s too cool for them! So step off, yo!”
“Oh, well I’m sorry,” Crowler apologized seriously.
“You SHOULD be!” Jaden scoffed. “I activate my Trap card, Hero Signal!” His Hero Signal card, lying dormant previously as a face-down trap card, flipped up and revealed a cityscape with an ‘H’-themed Bat Signal!” The card fired a large, flying ‘H’ into the air!”
“Oh no, not an ‘H’!” Crowler gasped!
“And that brings out my second Elemental Hero, Burstinatrix!” Jaden whipped out a red-clad lady in a jumpsuit, covering pretty much the least skin they settled for. May people gasped. “Whoops, THAT’S not the censored version!” He put it away and pulled out the 4Kid’s version, covering everything! A raging flame appeared in front of its summoner as many people watching booed Jaden.
“Argh!” Crowler recoiled!
“Yah!” the monster yelled as she leaped out of the flames! (Burstinatrix: 1200 Attack Points, 800 Defense Points)
“BurstINATRIX?! THAT’S not an appropriate name!!” Crowler screamed!

“But it doesn’t stand for ‘dominatrix’,” Syrus corrected from his seat, “the suffix means ‘woman’. I wish people would do their research, or stay in school and whatnot, instead of stealing and murdering.” Bastion shot him a dirty glance.
“My turn!” Jaden’s new card was covered in a few dozen skyscrapers and a full moon. “Alright, Winged Kuriboh! Thanks for saving me one turn! Here goes nuthin’!”
“BOO,” someone said.
“First, I return Avian to my hand with The Warrior Returning Alive!” Avian staggered back from the grave, covered in arrows and blood, then shone with intense light, blowing it all away!
“AND I LIVE!!” Avian announced! Then he leaped into Jaden’s hand and faded away, being a hologram and such. Then Jaden pulled out one SPECIAL card from his hand. “Now I’ll fuse him and Dominatrix… I mean, BURSTinatrix…”
“COULD YOU BE ANY MORE OBVIOUS WITH YOUR PUNS?!”
“Quiet, damn audience member! Now I’ll activate the Spell card Polymerization!” Jaden threw one of his Spell cards away to the Graveyard slot in the Duel Disk, summoning a swirling portal of blue energy to the field. Avian and Burstinatix both flew into the portal from Jaden’s hand, disappearing within the spiraling void of kewlness. Then the portal faded into pixie dust and started to re-form itself… as a green, creature-like man, with one wing and one dragon head for a right arm. He stood at around eight feet-tall, serving as the only cool thing to come from this series as of yet. “HE’S ELEMENTAL HERO FLAME WINGMAN, Y’ALL!!” (Flame Wingman: 2100 Attack Points) “I hope your Golem’s ready to die a violent, flaming death!! Yeah!”
“You’ve fought valiantly, I do admit… somewhat…” Crowler acknowledged, “But next time, young boy, you may want to do something less stupid.”

“What’s he mean?” Syrus asked.
“Flame Wingman’s only got 2100 Attack Points, while that Golem of Crowler’s got 3000 Attack Points, meaning that Jaden’s still losing. But if Jaden’s Flame Wingman WERE to defeat a monster, he would deal extra damage to the owner equal to the ORIGINAL Attack Points of the destroyed monster.”
“… You lost me there, Bastion. As far as I can see, Jaden’s going to lose this next turn. Then he’ll be forced out of the school, only to try again next year, over and over again rather than getting a real education, forcing him to live in the streets until he dies of starvation. Game over, man, game over.”
“That’s nice. Weirdo.”

“Alright, young scholar, I don’t mean to rush you but I AM a busy lady. Are you done yet?” rushed Crowler.
“Do you think I’m really that stupid?” Jaden asked.
“I’ll refrain from answering that.”
“Well I don’t care, ‘cause I’m usin’ the Field Spell card Skyscraper!” Jaden tossed the cool building-filled card onto his Duel Disk, summoning tall pointy structures all around the field, and even making a fat moon take up the background, assisted by a starry night! (Note: You cannot see stars at night in the city usually.) In a hilarious juxtaposition, the Ancient Gear Golem stood in the middle of the city, as if it were a raging kaiju from a monster film, while the winged hero leaped to the top of the tallest and pointiest building in the city. “Flame Wingman, show her why I deserve to go to them schools to get my edjumacation! Use Skydive Scorcher!”
“Bring it on!” it invited smugly! “Your silly little Skyscraper field card hasn’t lowered my Golem’s Attack Points at all!”
“You’re right, teach,” Jaden agreed, “but my Field card was made to INCREASE the Attack Points of ANY Elemental Hero, while attacking, by [i]ONE-THOUSAAAAAND!![/i]”
“O-O-O-ONE-THOUSAND?!" Crowler screamed! "[b]THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE!![/b]” The amazing hero man flew several meters up into the sky and held is dragon-arm outward. Then dropping down into the golem at super-high speed, it engulfed itself in flames, melting the monstrocity as it was touched, allowing for a great and fun injury. The golem’s chest was pierced and began to wobble around dangerously.
“Noooooooooo!!” Crowler worried in an overly stupid way!
“GASP!!” gasped the audience, though they honestly should have seen it coming!
“NOOOOO!! This cannot BEEEE!!My very… best… card… ow.” Crowler was shut up as a massive robot hologram came crashing down upon its skull.
“Oh yeah, and my super hero’s super power?” Jaden snickered. “It causes your Golem’s Attack Points to be deducted from your Life Points!”
“[i]Oh screw you,[/i]” Crowler muffled-ly growled from underneath the hulking hologram. And so, it was finally killed. (Crowler: 0 Life Points) Then the golem, the city and all the other holograms faded away into obscurity once again, and Crowler got better.

The guitar BGM played a happy, peppy tune! “That’s game!” Jaden winked!
“BOO!” somebody yelled.
“Who keeps doing that?!”
As the holograms all faded away, Crowler slowly got to his feet. “Impossible. I was defeated... in a trading card game?!”

“HUH, WOW!” Deep-Voice Dobbson exclaimed!
“WOW, I RECKON!” Billy Hills exclaimed!
“It must be dumb luck, there’s no way some flunky with a great deck could beat Ms. Crowler!!” Chazz shivered in fear!

“I knew it.” Alexis acknowledged. “Told ya, huh, Zane…what?” Mr. Darkblue walked away rudely. What a jerk. "He's still hot," Alexis shrugged.

“I was wrong! I love being wrong!” Syrus cheered!
“I could use some competition here. Besides everybody else at this school,” self-corrected Bastion.

“I made the academy!!” Jaden screamed in happiness as he leaped around stupidly. “Ha ha! Yeah, bisshies! Woooo!!”
“Yay,” cheered the audience. Jaden removed Winged Kuriboh from his deck and stared at it. “You’re gonna be the best meat shield ever.”
“OOH,” it winked.
[/spoiler]
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eyeofthedeck Newbie

eyeofthedeck

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That was funny! "He can't possibly lose if he has Yu in his name!" It's true! You should make an abridged series out of this. Also, when Yugi walks off at the beginning and in the episode Jaden looks at his watch, you could make him say: "Hey, that guy stole my watch! Now I won't know if i'm late!" Can't wait for episode 2.

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Weather Report - Stand Newbie

Weather Report - Stand

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That was funny! "He can't possibly lose if he has Yu in his name!" It's true! You should make an abridged series out of this. Also' date=' when Yugi walks off at the beginning and in the episode Jaden looks at his watch, you could make him say: "Hey, that guy stole my watch! Now I won't know if i'm late!" Can't wait for episode 2.

[/quote']

 

KaiKae's writing every even-numbered chapter, so they'll be even better than mine, I reckon.

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Kaisu Newbie

Kaisu

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Like, now.

Also, I just skimmed over it, and it lacks a bit in the descriptions. Also, most of the TAS-y stuf is in the next chapter. SOOOOOO

[spoiler=CHAPTER 2]

[spoiler=Part 1]The loud engine of a chopper could be heard as a bunch of people approached a volcano on a random island in well, a helicopter. “Attention new Duel Academy students…” A raspy and mechanical voice started.

 

“What? I can’t hear you!” A distant voice yelled.

 

“If you haven’t gone deaf already, you would have realized we are approaching your new home away from home.” The raspy voice continued.

 

“What!? In a volcano!?” Someone yelled, but of course, everyone had gone deaf so they couldn’t hear him,

 

“Yay! We’re gonna be all nice and toasty!” Some idiot yelled, and again no-one heard him.

 

“Now now, I know you’re exited but don’t shout. And for your information, a volcano is a perfectly safe place to live.” The voice said yet again.

 

“I wanna go home!” Someone yelled, but of course no-one told him not to shout, because they were all deaf.

 

“Tighten your seatbelts and adjust your seats into an upright position because we’re about to land on Academy Island.” The raspy voice said, and the helicopter strafed and every hit their heads on the ceiling.

 

“Hey… Wait a second… We teleported!” Jaden exclaimed, surprised. They were in a large dome thingy and there were seats on one side and a giant screen on the other, reading DA.

 

“I can apperate! My mum will be so proud!” Random Voice sang.

 

“BOO!” Another voice shouted. Well anyway, back to the story. They were all standing there in ranks of red, blue and yellow uniforms.

 

“Good… Now if I get led to my untimely and bloody death I won’t have to worry about by clothes getting bloodstained…” Syrus said emo-ly. A few people blinked. Someone got poked in the eye by Syrus’s hair, and they fell to the ground. “Why can’t I get poked in the eye?” Syrus muttered. Suddenly the screen changed to reveal a bald person in a brown uniform, and he held the world record for ‘longest goatee’.

 

“Good Morning.” He said and and several people went, well… “Lee Gasp!” The collective gasp was echoed throughout the crowd. Suddenly Someone pulled a jar into the air and closed it quickly.

 

“Yes! The ultra-rare limited-edition ‘Lee Gasp’ gasp is mine!” Someone said. “Well anyway, my name is Someone. Good to meet you.” He said, and being a minor character, he disappeared.

 

“It’s Professor Dumbledore!” Random Voice gasped.

 

“’elcome my students.” The Dumbledore/Goatee/Computer virus continued.

 

“No! You minor characters made us miss the ‘and’ and the ‘w’ in ‘welcome’!” Alexis screamed.

 

“Sheperd or master and YOU!” He paused to point at a snoring Jaden. “Are the brightest and best duelists in the world.”

 

“SNORE!” Jaden snored.

 

“Now please, get yourself settled in at your assigned dorms. I think you’ll find them quite comfortable, depending on how you ranked of course…” He gave an evil laugh.

 

Jaden and Syrus teleported and now they were sitting on a rock/tablet thing, both holding GreyBerrys.

 

“Well, I don’t know about you Sy, but I’m in the Slifer Red dorm.”

 

“That’s sad! Same as me!” ‘Sy’ replied. Bastion walked by, hoping no-one would bully him.

 

“Hey! You in red too?” Jaden shouted and Bastion ran away. He soon re-appeared with an evil smile.

 

“Well, let’s see here, yellow sleeves, yellow buttons, I don’t think so.” He replied.

 

“Oh! I get it, that’s why Sy and I are in red.” Jaden said, suddenly being smart for once.

 

“Please don’t tell me you just figured that out now…” Bastion sighed. Is he colorblind or something? He thought.

 

“So what! Ever think I’m colorblind!” Jaden shouted with sudden rage. How did he know? Bastion thought.

 

“Uhh… No actually, I didn’t think you were colorblind… Erm… Boo?” Bastion stammered.

 

“No but I could have been.” Jaden said with a chuckle, and he saw Bastion sneaking off. “See you around the dorms!” He shouted at him, waving, and Bastion darted off.

 

“I doubt that, your dorm’s over there…” His voice drifted. Jaden looked up from his GreyBerry, and saw a thing with a red roof.

 

“Teleport power!” Jaden shouted. And he and Syrus were on the deck of a cream colored building with a red roof.

 

“This isn’t a dorm, It’s like one of those outhouse thingies. Only it has a deck. Not to be associated with cards. Oh well, at least our bodies will be intact if the building topples and we fall to our untimely deaths.” Syrus sighed.

 

“Hey! Check out the view! It’s sweet! Hey seagull! What you lookin’ at? Hey… Ahh! Help!” Jaden screamed. He opened a door. Jaden now had blood stains on his uniform, but it was censored by 4Kids.

 

“Kinda small huh?” Syrus said weakly.

 

“Hey, you’re tiny! It’s me we need to worry about! I’m going through puberty and I’m living in this palace! And for our first year here” Jaden said loudly. In case you don’t know, he’s a bouncy optimist.

 

“It’s weird isn’t it, meeting at the entrance exams and now roommates?” Syrus said, mustering all the enthusiasm he had. “You think we were connected to each other in some ancient life Jaden? Like you were the Egyptian Pharaoh and I was the guardian seto?” He continued blabbering.

 

“No offence, but that’s just lame.” Jaden said, bemused.

 

“B-b-but it could be true!” Syrus bawled.

 

“Forget it! They broke the molds when they made the two of us.” Jaden continued, ready for a duel to the death. Of wit.

 

“Yeah… but for different reasons...” Syrus sighed.

 

“We’re going to have to work on that confidence, but first, let’s work on this pad!” He said.

 

“I’m an emo! I’m not supposed to-” Syrus protested as Jaden ripped the curtains open.

 

“ROOOOOOOOOOOOAR!” Something roared. “Those were closed for a reason!” Something continued. Something had a low and very annoyed-sounding voice.

 

“Sor-” Syrus began, but was rudely interrupted by Jaden. “Sorry, we didn’t see you up there…”

 

“Well, can you see me now!?” Something shouted menacingly, and a large koala bear sat up on the top bunk. “ROOOOOAR!” The koala bear roared again and Jaden and Syrus hugged each other, screaming.

 

“I always loved you Syrus!” Jaden wept.

 

“Stop screaming! Who are you and what are you doing in my room?” The koala roared again. Jaden and Syrus gave a sigh of relief.

 

“Oh, sorry. My name’s Jaden Yucky. I mean Yuki.” Jaden said, rubbing the back of his head.

 

“Yeah, I’m Syrus.” Syrus said in a soft voice, so soft that he had to say it through a microphone.

 

“We’re your new roommates!” Jaden added quickly. The Koala grunted and rolled around in his bed.

 

“You’re new all right, so let me tell you how things work here.” The Koala said.

 

“Oh, I know how things work. You duel and they give you a color. Like we’re Red for Red-Hot Awsome!” Jaden shouted, punching the air.

 

“No, we’re red for blood-red.” Syrus said, but no-one heard him.

 

“Actually. There aren’t any other things, so ignore what I said before and just pretend I said ‘Uhh.. What things?’ instead, okay?” Jaden said over Syrus.

 

“Yeah, say I said “Like what parent’s we get?” Syrus said loudly for the first time. I should note that he’s a Scientologist.

 

“Uhh.. Like how the color thing works. That’s more important than anything.” The Koala said, and Jaden spoke. “But we-“ He stopped when he thought of Koala-Scars. “IGNORE ME!” Jaden shouted and he sunk under the bed.

 

“You got three different kinds of students here.” He paused while the animater/writer person changed the scene. Oh right, I’m supposed to do that. The screen… Erm, page changed to show and castle with a bunny rabbit in front of it. The castle had a blue roof, and the bunny was wearing a blue uniform. He had spiky black hare, I mean ‘hair’, and he’s holding up a large sign saying “I’M ZANE YOU *****”. And now he’s holding a sign saying “DON’T WRITE DOWN THE SIGNS” and the bunny is now turning red. Wait… Omigosh! That was Zane! Oh well. “Obilisk Blue Students,” The Koala started listing. Anyway, we’ll change the page to a yellow mansion-like building with a green roof, and there’s a stupid idiot who plays card games bouncing in front of it. He’s wearing a yellow uniform and has Bastian’s hair. Hmm… I think I should buy Bastian a wig for Christmas. Or write one. Anyway, he has Bastian’s face and, I think it’s his brother. “Ra Yellow Students” The Koala continued. The page is now going to show a cliff with a toolshed with a red roof driving off it, and in front of it a kid in a red uniform and Jaden’s body is crouching down and shaking his head like one of those bobble-head thingies. “And Slifer Red Students” The Koala said, and Jaden started jumping up and down and chewing his nails. Hmm.. Maybe I should change the voice acter. Or the animator. Yes, definetly the animator who choses the font. “The blues are the highest ranked Students. Some kids are in there because they’re great, other’s because they’re rich. Or they bribed the Kazuki Takashi. Yellows are the second highest. Mostly because they’re the younger students with a lot of potential. Even Bastian. Who care’s if he has an IQ of 16 and never made it past Kindergarten.” The Koala paused for a second. He pulled out his ‘Dramatic Voice’ medicine and gulp in down, and in a dramatic voice he said “Then, there’s us.” Jaden gave a gasp. “The Red Wonders.” The Koala finished. Syrus gasped.

 

“They should gave called us the Red Blood Pool!” Syrus protested.

 

“Ooh! Red Wonders! I should make a fan club!” Jaden said dreamily.

 

“No, Wonders as in ‘I wonder how these blunders even got this far’.” The Koala said, and Jaden’s face lit up.

 

“That rhymed!” He exclaimed happily.

 

“Look, we’re bottom of the barrel here.” The Koala said. Actually, I think we should give him a name. Like Koala Ko Ala. Okay, his name is now Koala Ko Ala. “Oh, I’m Chumley by the way.” Koala Ko Ala said. Drat. So much for Koala Ko Ala. Nah, let’s keep it as Koala Ko Ala.

 

They teleported to a cliffy bit, and Syrus is all hunched up and Jaden’s acting like he owns the place. I better call HEIL KAIBA!!!! Seto about this. Syrus sighed. Humph. He’s ruining my page time.

[spoiler=Part 2]“Aww, don’t tell me you’re still depressed!” Jaden said, annoyed, but Syrus remained hunched up.

 

“But Chumley said we’re the worst….” Syrus sighed. Suddenly an assassin jumped behind Syrus and pulled a knife to his back.

 

“Call him Koala Ko Ala.” He muttered menacingly, and he disappeared. Ha. Teach him for ruining MY names. Anyway, I made them walk on an endless path, so they’re still walking.

 

“Forget that. Red’s a sweet color!” Jaden said happily like he always does. “Think about it, where does Red Hot come from? From red baby!” Jaden continued. Syrus stopped and started to cheer up. And he was supposed to be emo. “Besides, the year hasn’t even started yet! So how can we be the worst?” Jaden continued yet again.

 

“Yeah! Your Right! Red is for Blood! Dripping! Dead! Wet! I’m like a murder scene! Or one of those vials of blood right?” Syrus asked, suddenly becoming strange and Jaden turned for some reason.

 

“Hey, I’m not a bottle!” Jaden protested and started dashing towards the main building. “There’s some kind of duel action taking place in there!” Jaden called to Syrus and he entered the building. It had three large domes. One Red, at the lowest point, one yellow, at the halfway mark, and one blue, and the top. On top of that was a large white dome.

 

“Hey! Wait up! How do you know?” Syrus asked, out of breath, while Jaden merely replied with a “I just know.” They teleported. “It was this way. I’m sure of it.” Jaden said, while Syrus had an uncertain look on his face.

 

“How do you know?” Syrus asked.

 

“I just do. Be quiet and come.” Jaden snapped, and the rest of the journey was in silence. Idiot. Can’t he smell it in the air? Jaden thought. Hmm.. Knowing him, he’s going to way he could smell it. Maybe I could if the pollen count wasn’t about to bring about by super-sensetive allergies… Syrus thought. “Oh! Wow! Cool!” Jaden made noises of admiration was they entered are large dome-shaped building with rows of chairs climbing up, and a large duel arena in the middle.

 

“Yeah, no kidding. This stainless place is full of deadly chemicals that would kill us in a millisecond.” Syrus said, while gasping at the site of two people standing on the arena. “People!” Syrus exclaimed, tugging Jaden’s sleeve franticly.

 

“Boby! I say it would be awesome to duel here!” An irritating voice said.

 

“Yeah Hill, it would.” A deep voice replied.

 

“Let’s find out!” Jaden exclaimed and rushed up to the two.

 

“Don’t! If you slip you would land on the floor and choke on your own tounge!” Syrus exclaimed desperately.

 

“Hey look! Slifer Rejects! I reckon.” The irritating voiced person said.

 

“Look at the crest. Huh kid huh?” The deep-voiced person said, pointing above the entrance. There was a dead deer’s head on a plate stuck to the wall.

 

“You know, if people start hunting at the massive rates they do know, the world would be extinct of all animals within less than a hundred years.” Syrus sighed.

 

“Hey! Let’s duel!” Jaden called at one of the people there.

 

“Hey! You’re a kid!” Irritating Voiced Person said, bug-eyed.

 

“Hey Chazz, it’s that applicant you beat Mrs. Crowler! Huh Chazz huh?” Deep Voiced Person called into the sidelines. Immediately Chazz appeared. He frowned.

 

“Deep-Voice Dobbson, Billy Hills! YOUR VOICES INFURIATE ME!!!” Chazz screamed. Jaden gasped.

 

“My names Jaden!” Jaden shouted, but he started breathing out of-control-y after. “Wussup Chazz.” He finished.

 

“Hey, that’s Chazz Princeton. Top Duelist at Prince Dueling School. He’s gonna be the next King of Games! Top Duelist in the World!” Billy Hills and Deep-Voice Dobbson said together.

 

“Impossible.” Jaden grunted, folding his arms. Deep Voice Dobbson and Billy Hills collapsed onto the floor, dead. “You see, I’m top!” Jaden finished. He rushed up to where Chazz was and bumped into him. “Can I have my free card now?” Jaden asked. Chazz snorted and Jaden teleported back where he was before. Suddenly Deep-Voice and Billy jumped up and started lol-ing.

 

“CAN IT YOU VOICE REJECTS!” Chazz screamed. “This… Erm… Kid might be right.” Chazz continued, stepping down from the sidelines.

 

“Waddaya mean Chazz?” Dobbson asked.

 

“I mean, he did beat my mum and her legendary monster. It’s gotta take some skill to do that.” Chazz said, and Billy Hills gasped.

 

“Mr.- I mean Mrs. Crowler’s your mum?” She asked, slackjawed.

 

“Or, what it luck?”

 

“Never! Let’s Duel!” Jaden screamed.

 

“Don’t! The only reason he exists is because his dad bribed the writers. He had for ten years. Then his dad made this place. And then Chazz’s uncle got kidnapped. So he was made by the animators. Yes. Seto Kaiba and ??? Crowler are Chazz’s parents.” A voice said. They all turned to face Alexis.

 

“My room is off limits! Even during the night!” Chazz screamed. “Screw the off-screen stuff! I got money! Tons of it! AND MY DAD GAVE IT TO ME!!!”

 

“Fine then~ No dinner for you.” Alexis said in a mother-like tone and walked off.

 

“No!” Everyone but Syrus and Jaden screamed and they rushed off.

 

“She’s haawt.” Syrus drooled.

 

“By the way, sorry if Chazz rubbed you the wrong way. By honey-bunches can be like that with Slifers. Bye~” Alexis suddenly said.

 

“Don’t worry. I’ll free of labor.” Jaden said happily. Alexis blushed.

 

“You don’t know me.” She quickly said with a wry laugh and disappeared again.

 

“Hey, we should be having dinner as well!” Syrus suddenly realized and he teleported. Jaden was jogging on the spot then, almost ready to go.

 

“What’s your name again?” He asked.

 

“Alexis Rhodes.” Alexis replied, and Jaden teleported as well. In the Obelisk castle everyone was drinking fruit cocktails and champagne, Chazz’s mum and some other ‘haawt’ teacher telling everyone to ‘not tell their parents’. In the Ra Mansion, everyone was drinking ancient Japanese tea, ones that were made a hundred years ago, and eating fish. In the Slifer Toolshed, everyone was starving, only having rice, tuna and curry to eat. The Headmaster started a speech when Jaden suddenly cried “This stuff’s good!”, scoffing down his meal. The large figure of the headmaster towered over him.

 

“If someone does not feel like waiting… Let’s eat!” The headmaster exclaimed.

 

They teleported and Syrus was pouring tea, muttering about how if he spilled the kettle he would have his hand burnt to ashes. After offering some Tea to Koala Ko Ala and being snapped back at, Syrus shrank into a corner and held a knife at his wrist. The knife was trembling in his hands, almost touching his wrist.

 

“I… Must… Not… Hair… Tells… Me… Not… T-to… Must… Not… Kill… Self..” He was muttering. Something beeped and Jaden pulled out his YugiNav™ and a message from Chazz played.

 

“Duel me. Midnight. Don’t tell anyone about be and Alexis. Winner get’s loser’s best card. Over.” Chazz said through the machine.

 

“Bye!” Jaden called. He teleported into the arena, followed by Syrus. There he saw Chazz and co.

 

“Well, well, well. You came. Wait… Oh shoot. Mum’s gonna kill me…” Chazz said.

 

“Yeah. So, what is it with you and Alexis?” Jaden asked.

 

“Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah I can’t hear you.” Chazz said absentmindedly.

 

“Let’s see who’s the real king of games. And have your best card ready.” Chazz grunted. Heh heh. I’m gonna give this idiot a Slifer the Sky Dragon. Heh heh. Ultimate-Rare cards rule. Chazz thought. Finnaly I can get rid of my stupid Wing Kuribroh. Jaden thought.

 

“Duel.” The both said and their Duel Disks started shifting into Duel Mode. Their lifes points flashed to 4000. “Reborn Zombie! Defense Mode!” Chazz called, slapping down his card.

 

“Hey, you can’t-” Jaden started but Chazz cut him off. “Screw it. I’ll give you a Wing Kuribroh.” The Reborn Zombie was a fleshed skeleton, with no eyes, several bones revealed where the flesh was ripped.

 

“Brains brains brains.” The Zombie said.

 

‘I set one card and end.” Chazz finished.

 

“BOO!”

 

Jaden checked his cards. He drew an Elemental Hero Avian.

 

“OOH” A voice said.

 

“Fluffball! I need a vacuum cleaner for you.” Jaden said. “Okay! I use Swirly Lines! I fuse Elemental Hero Avian and Angry Girl!” Jaden finished. The swirly lines started to swirl and the two cards were surrounded in a bright light.

 

“BOo? Booh.”

 

“Elemental Hero Flame Wingman!” Jaden called and the green machine came out.

 

“L.O.L.O.L.O.L.O.L. You set off my trap. Gessodian Polymer do your stuff!” Chazz laughed. A strange purple aura emitted from the card.

 

“Oh noes!” A voice yelp in shock. Alexis came walking into the arena, cutting cords with her high heels. The Reborn Zombie shattered and the aura washed over E-Hero Flame Wingman, and he jumped to Chazz’s side of the field. Covered in the purple aura, the colors of the monster became much darker.

 

“Heh heh. N00b.” Chazz heh-heh-ed.

 

“Hey, I can summon another monster according to it’s effect though.” Jaden said. “Alright then. Elemental Hero Action Figure! Defense Mode!” Jaden called and a large brown figure appeared. With large balls of mud for parts, it obviously had a high defense.

 

“Heh heh. I summon Gesonian Soldier! Flame Dragonarm! Attack!” Chazz shouted. The Elemental Hero jumped into the air and burst into flame. It came crashing down on Action Figure, destroying him easily. The Flame Wingman sent a ball of fire at Jaden, making him take a bunch of damage, then the Gesonian Soldier came and cut Jaden. His life points were now down to 2000.

 

“You may have felt like something at home, but in reality, you’re worse than an amateur.” Chazz said enticingly. “One face-down will end my turn.” He said and he ended his turn. Jaden started sobbing hysterically. “Aww.. What’s wrong?” Chazz asked, stiffing a laugh. Jaden was laughing.

 

“This is too fun! I’m losing and I don’t even care because my ‘Yu’ protects me!” He exclaimed.

 

“BOO!”

 

“If Jaden didn’t have that ‘Yu’ in his name, he would have lost by now.” Alexis was saying gravely.

 

“Elemental Hero Sparkman! Let’s go!” Jaden said as he ‘threw down’ a card. The monster made a big fuss of flexing it’s muscles, the blue and gold armor shining from the electricity around him. “Dude! Attack with Static Shockwave!” Jaden called and a large beam of electricity burst out of Elemental Hero Sparkman’s outstretched arm. The Gesonian Soldier turned to dust and Chazz took 400 Life Point damage, bringing him down 3600 points. A sword was spinning in the air and it flew towards Jaden, hitting him square in the stomach. He cried out from the pain of 2-D holograms, and Chazz laughed. Jaden grunted and inserted a face-down card, and ended his turn. “Flame Dude! Attack before I draw my card!” Chazz shouted, and a trap card activated. “A trap!” CHazz exclaimed as if he had never heard of one before.

 

“Right.” Jaden nodded. “So our monsters swap sides.” Jaden said. The two monsters wer covered in a golden beam and they teleported to the other’s side, and they lunged at each other. They struggled against each other for a moment. “All right! Go Wingman!” Jaden shouted, punching the air. Soon the plates of armor on Sparkman started to release electricity, a bright blue light filling the room, and soon he shattered. Chazz screamed in pain as he took 500 LP damage. “Like you said before, don’t forget Wingman’s super power.” Jaden said enthusiasticly. The released electricity headed for Chazz and went through him, causing more damage as he screamed again from the pain a hologram with no physical form caused.

 

“Oh, now the electricity’s gonna hit us too, and eventually the building, and all the lights will flick on, and everything will go poof.” Syrus sighed.

 

“Nice move Jaden!” Alexis cheered.

 

“More like lucky move.” Chazz grunted and he pulled out a spell card from his hand. “I activate Gesonian Blast!” He continued. “Now, since my monster was destroyed, now one of yours is destroyed as well! Say goodbye!” Chazz shouted. A small whirpool formed underneath Wingman.

 

“Err.. Goodbye?” Jaden said, confused.

 

“And you take damage equal to half of it’s attack points.” Chazz finished as Wingman shattered. Jaden let out an annoyed “Oh.” As he took his damage. “My Wingman.” He said as his Life Points were now at a grand total of 550.

 

“Now, I activate Call of the Haunted!” Chazz shouted, pointing a finger at Jaden. His face-down card flipped up. “It let’s me special summon one monster from my grave in attack mode!” His Gesonian Soldier came up from the ground with no special effects. “And now I sacrifice him to special summon Meythis the Infernal General!” A soldier clad in black armor and holding a large trident-like weapon appeared on his black horse, which had head armor.

 

“Not bad.” Jaden nodded.

 

“Not bad. Especially since this card will bring your doom!”

 

“Never! My ‘Yu’ will protect me!”

 

“OOH.” A fairy-like voice ‘OOH’-ed. He pulled out his card, which was a Wing Kuribroh.

 

“I hate you fluffball.” He said and he drew his card in a semi-dramatic manner. He smiled when he saw his card. Alexis and Syrus heard footsteps and turned to look at the entrance.

 

“GUYS! We got cops comin’ this way! RUN FOR IT!” Alexis shouted.

 

“Why?” Jaden asked as the holograms disappeared.

 

“The Law of KaibaLand Duel Academy states that no off-hour duels are allowed. CHazz knew that, and lemme guess, he didn’t tell you.” She said as Chazz blushed.

 

“Well well well. You lucked out this time.” Chazz grunted as he walked off.

 

“You had him in the bag, huh Chazz huh?” Deep-Voice Dobbson said in a deep-voice.

 

“Yeah, you did. I reckon.” Billy Hills said in an irritating voice.

 

“YOUR VOICES INFURIATE ME!” Chazz screamed.

 

“HEY! I was about to lose!” Jaden protested.

 

“Jaden, we gotta get out of here or we’ll be locked up!” Syrus yelled as he broke into a sprint.

 

“Stoopid.” Jaden moaned as they teleported. Three black-clad police officers stepped into the arena, looking for people to lock up. But everyone had teleported away.

 

“Thanks for showing us the back way.” Syrus panted as he dragged Jaden.

 

“Sorry you couldn’t finish your duel.” Alexis apologized.

 

“Neh. I knew I would win anyway.” Jaden said.

 

“What? Because of your ‘Yu’?” Alexis asked.

 

“No, because of this.” Jaden grinned as he pulled out a Monster Reborn. He had a vision where the shining card caused his Flame Wingman to fly out of his graveyard zone. The Flame Wingman was on fire as headed for the general and a mushroom cloud took up the page. Chazz was coughing as his Life Points shrunk to zero.

 

“But the Yu-Gi-Oh Wikia states that that’s impossible.” Alexis gasped.

 

“See ya!” Jaden called out, waving his hand as he headed for his dorm. Syrus chased after him shortly after. This is gonna be one interesting year… Alexis thought as she watch the two walk off.

 

[spoiler=Author's Note]I appoligize. The person who wrote this kept on putting random post-it's on the pages, and they got uploaded as well.

 

 

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