~YCM's Dating Club~ (Join, because we're cool ;D)

[DL]

Calm down, Swifty =0

Everythin will be okay


If she asked you out, destiny must have plans for you two ;DD

[Spirit of DMG]

Some people don't believe in Poly-Amerism. They think "More than two people per relationship? You're going to Hell." -.-; My response: "I'm going, don't worry. But not for that."
Anyway, ask her what she thinks of it. If she asks "What does that mean?" Then she doesn't practice it.
And, yes, Polygamy, though traditionally applied only to marriage, actually is any form of romantic relationship where one person is involved with multiple partners, with only the single person being involved with any of the others.
Poly-Am differs from this in that every partner is involved with the other partners.
Your case sounds like the former.

[Kōsuke Ueki]

Sure looks like it. Glad to know. Cause if it was the latter, I would have been dead already for over a year.

[Rapidfire]

Alright your in a big mess C4, but it's nothing that can't be solved. I'm not going to tell you to break up with her. Get to know her more, you can't judge a book by it's cover, or the first chapter. I'd be screwed if that was the case. If what you say is true, I really think you should talk to her more. Even if your scared out of your mind, your already screwed if you don't do anything. So why not try. Plus it's really easy to get a girl to break up with you, for me the big thing that bugs me is when a guy is clingy. If you still want to get rid of her be clingy, and get her number, and text her non stop. She will probably break in about 2 to 3 weeks. Now one thing I will tell you now is that ether way you will have a bad rep, but if you can get her to break up with you... It's not going to be as bad. If you need anymore help, feel free to Pm me~

[DL]

^ A good point

There's always the option of getting HER to break up with you

Of course, maybe she will like your clingyness, and like you even more? O.o


What do you think?

[Aerion Brightflame]

Oh life and it's mirrors.

I know what you are feeling, kinda. Well actually a lot, given I am stuck in a relationship I don't hugely want to be in, and I'm now faced with ending it without turning her into the same waste of a person I am. And I also know just how irritating Aspergers is to your judgement, and to your life in general. It's turned my head into an arse. But enough about me.

You have landed yourself into a situation which whilst it is unfortunate, you can get out of. But, no matter what, someone will be hurt by it, it's nothing you you can avoid. Now, there may be the slight possibility of you getting shot, but theres also the possibility that the other guy is just a regular guy like you. That's probably more likely. But the truth of it is one way or another she will be hurt more if you let her get more connected to things than if you don't. If you ever did care about her, then doing right by her given the situation is the best thing you can do.

And as for what people will do after its over you don't know that. I always expect things to have meaning in life, that conversations should matter but they don't. Conversations rarely happen like you think they should. If they ask, then just either go away from them, stay silent, or tell the truth. If they don't believe you, it doesn't matter becuase you gave the a reason. And when they don't believe you, tell them to ask her.

And now for my attempt at a motivational speech. You made a crappy decsion that will no doubt leave you hurt and probably her. You are human. It is our natured to be flawed, and to make mistakes, and to mess up peoples lives. There is nothing you can do to change that, and you will no doubt do it again over the course of your life. What matters now, and what will define you as a person is how you handle the situation. You can live in fear of an outcome that is unlikely to happen, or you can do the right thing. Theres nothing you can do to change what you did no matter how much you want to, no matter how much the guilt eats away at you. Now you can either be labeled a coward, or an arse. But in the case of the latter you can at least know you did the right thing you could in the situation.

Now Rapid's idea is a good one but... The only way you are certain to get out of the situation is to act yourself. Not rely on others to do things.

[Spirit of DMG]

... You call that a motivational speech?
...
Yeah, it's still better than what I'd end up doing...

[Aerion Brightflame]

I said attempt Besides, in my expierence you motivate someone more by being truthful than any of the rousing things you see in a movie. Since the truth hurts, and pain is the greatest way to get someone to do something.

Of course that's all from my own messed up expieriences but ti seems to work.

[Spirit of DMG]

Now make an attempt at a motivational speech by using the kind of rousing things you see in a movie.

[Lt. Colonel Remo]

"Alright men, this is it! The enemy is just over the woods in French Fry Field ( there was a NATGEO documentary on Vietnam late last night. First person to get what I referenced will get 10,000 points), hidden in their bunkers like ants in anthill! They cower like pests in fear of the pesticide we call Righteous Justice! We will cleanse them of this Earth so that all will remember of the cowardice they will display in battle today! Fight in the name of your homeland, that you may be remembered in the hearts of Men, such as Neil Strong-Arm and Aldrin the Great, who conquered The White Shores of the World Across The Dark Sea, during the thousand year War of Cold."

[Nathanael D. Striker]

Concerning Rapid's post, I had to learn about the clingy part the hard way. I get to clingy when I get close to someone I like. Guess that comes with me opening up to someone, though it isn't something I like that much in myself. So yea, do what you can and get out ASAP C4.

[Kōsuke Ueki]

[quote name='Rapidfire' timestamp='1356761789' post='6104911']
Alright your in a big mess C4, but it's nothing that can't be solved. I'm not going to tell you to break up with her. Get to know her more, you can't judge a book by it's cover, or the first chapter. I'd be screwed if that was the case. If what you say is true, I really think you should talk to her more. Even if your scared out of your mind, your already screwed if you don't do anything. So why not try. Plus it's really easy to get a girl to break up with you, for me the big thing that bugs me is when a guy is clingy. If you still want to get rid of her be clingy, and get her number, and text her non stop. She will probably break in about 2 to 3 weeks. Now one thing I will tell you now is that ether way you will have a bad rep, but if you can get her to break up with you... It's not going to be as bad. If you need anymore help, feel free to Pm me~
[/quote]

Wait, you want me to be CLINGY!? Uh, no. No way in hell. I suck at being that kind of person, and the suspicions would start flowing in if I f**k up. Now, I don't mind getting to know her better, so I'll keep that in mind when I get back to school. But everything else is off the table. Sorry.

[quote name='Fluttershy401' timestamp='1356781678' post='6104985']
^ A good point

There's always the option of getting HER to break up with you

Of course, maybe she will like your clingyness, and like you even more? O.o


What do you think?
[/quote]

Like I said, I've never been the clingy person before, so I'm pretty sure I would screw up the first time. So, that's out of the question.

[quote name='Overlord Barty' timestamp='1356795019' post='6105057']
Oh life and it's mirrors.

I know what you are feeling, kinda. Well actually a lot, given I am stuck in a relationship I don't hugely want to be in, and I'm now faced with ending it without turning her into the same waste of a person I am. And I also know just how irritating Aspergers is to your judgement, and to your life in general. It's turned my head into an arse. But enough about me.

You have landed yourself into a situation which whilst it is unfortunate, you can get out of. But, no matter what, someone will be hurt by it, it's nothing you you can avoid. Now, there may be the slight possibility of you getting shot, but there's also the possibility that the other guy is just a regular guy like you. That's probably more likely. But the truth of it is one way or another she will be hurt more if you let her get more connected to things than if you don't. If you ever did care about her, then doing right by her given the situation is the best thing you can do.

And as for what people will do after its over you don't know that. I always expect things to have meaning in life, that conversations should matter but they don't. Conversations rarely happen like you think they should. If they ask, then just either go away from them, stay silent, or tell the truth. If they don't believe you, it doesn't matter because you gave the a reason. And when they don't believe you, tell them to ask her.

And now for my attempt at a motivational speech. You made a crappy decision that will no doubt leave you hurt and probably her. You are human. It is our nature to be flawed, and to make mistakes, and to mess up peoples lives. There is nothing you can do to change that, and you will no doubt do it again over the course of your life. What matters now, and what will define you as a person is how you handle the situation. You can live in fear of an outcome that is unlikely to happen, or you can do the right thing. There's nothing you can do to change what you did no matter how much you want to, no matter how much the guilt eats away at you. Now you can either be labeled a coward, or an arse. But in the case of the latter you can at least know you did the right thing you could in the situation.

Now Rapid's idea is a good one but... The only way you are certain to get out of the situation is to act yourself. Not rely on others to do things.
[/quote]

Now I know 3 people, minus myself, with Asperger's. Soon, I'll have to make a club for us! [/sarcasm]

Now, to put it simply, I do care about her, mainly about what goes on in her mind. Something about her is wrong and I would love to explore it better so that I can try to help her through any pain she's going through in her own personal life. I know somebody's gonna be hurt, but I don't want it to be her. Cause then, that same hurt would come onto me for putting her through this, and I wouldn't forgive myself by telling the truth. You don't know how many times I've wanted to ask her, but it always ended up the same way: I'm at a loss of words before I even ask her that question. I've been afraid of lots of things for most of my life, but this takes the cake.

And if any of you didn't know, for most of my life as a kid, I always isolated myself from everyone else, always waiting for that one person to actually care about my feelings and comfort me. But, that never happened. And I've always done it, either by instinct or on purpose, to get attention and have people actually care about how I feel. Soon enough, I waited long enough and just decided to get involved. I was scared, but I got over it as time went on. What's happening now is a different story. There are so many possibilities of what'll happen if I just tell her the truth, I feel like I'm in an episode of Doctor Who (Never watched the show, so don't correct me if that's not how the show works). I had thought this fear would have disappeared a long time ago, but now it's back full force in a new way I can't even imagine to overcome.

Now, I get I have to act on my own instinct, that's how I've been able to survive. But sometimes you have to rely on others to help you through this kind of stuff. I can't do this alone, tbh. If I did all this on my own, it would take at least a few years to actually grow a pair and tell her the truth. That's why I'm talking to all of you about it. If I kept this to myself, I would have ended up going crazy and probably end up in an insane asylum given enough time. But that's just me.

I will tell her, I just need the motivation to do it. Until then, even though you've all been helpful, now's not the time to do it.

[Nathanael D. Striker]

[quote name='Double C4' timestamp='1356805407' post='6105179']
And if any of you didn't know, for most of my life as a kid, I always isolated myself from everyone else, always waiting for that one person to actually care about my feelings and comfort me. But, that never happened. And I've always done it, either by instinct or on purpose, to get attention and have people actually care about how I feel. Soon enough, I waited long enough and just decided to get involved.
[/quote]

This is where we are similar. I think a lot of people who know my story (or even pieces of it) can testify that this is how I've been.

[Althemia]

[quote name='Double C4' timestamp='1356805407' post='6105179']
And if any of you didn't know, for most of my life as a kid, I always isolated myself from everyone else, always waiting for that one person to actually care about my feelings and comfort me. But, that never happened. And I've always done it, either by instinct or on purpose, to get attention and have people actually care about how I feel. Soon enough, I waited long enough and just decided to get involved. I was scared, but I got over it as time went on. What's happening now is a different story. There are so many possibilities of what'll happen if I just tell her the truth, I feel like I'm in an episode of Doctor Who (Never watched the show, so don't correct me if that's not how the show works). I had thought this fear would have disappeared a long time ago, but now it's back full force in a new way I can't even imagine to overcome.
[/quote]

Then take a damn gamble for once in your life. Life would be boring if we could figure out all the answers. Go with whatever you find best and just roll with it, that's the best course of action you can take. Besides, you're going to end up hurting her either way. The more time you spend fretting over this, the less affection you'll be showing her and the less she'll feel wanted. The less she'll feel wanted, the less comfortable she'll be. Less comfortable, less loved. Better not keep her waiting for too long or else you'll mess yourself up in the end

[Akira]

@C4 - I think all of your problems could be immediately solved by doing precisely 57 barrel rolls (no more no less)

Thank me later.

[Aerion Brightflame]

As much as I would love it to be, life is not predictable. Eventually you have to take a risk, even if its the one thats most logical. I know how hard it is, but whatever you do it will help make you as a person. Becuase as it's been stated, if life was entirely predictable, it wouldn't be fun.

As much as I hate to admit it, I'm glad that everything that went wrong for me in the past year happened as much as I hate that it did. Simply becuase it's made me a more complete person. I have people who give a damn about me, who will go out of there way to help me. And all of it comes becuase I made did the right thing in the crappiest situation I've ever been in. And then if you are anything like me, this is your chance to become a better person, and to not let your fears dictate your life.

Waiting will never achieve anything but give you regrets. Make you regret not doing things sooner. Maybe it'll end badly, maybe it'll end well. You never know till you do it.

[Kōsuke Ueki]

[quote name='Akira' timestamp='1356807156' post='6105213']
@C4 - I think all of your problems could be immediately solved by doing precisely 57 barrel rolls (no more no less)

Thank me later.
[/quote]

I should shoot you now, but I'm confused as to what you're talking about, so I'll wait until the ridiculousness shines through.

@Barty: I know I shouldn't wait. But for now, I have to wait, because I got no means of contact with her to set things straight, at least not directly-

0_0 THAT'S IT!! I think I know what to do now. Thanks guys, I appreciate the support. I'll get back to you when I finally get things straightened out.

LATER!

[Lt. Colonel Remo]

;_; My inspiring speech that typed from my phone was ignored

And as to c-4's dilemma, there isn't much that was already said. But above all else, don't do something you will regret

Trust me, if you truly love her, the regret of missing your chance is arguably even worse than anything anybody could do to you physically

[Kōsuke Ueki]

Good to know Remo.

BTW, my progress on finding her is slowly but surely getting somewhere. Problem is, I found her Facebook, turns out she hasn't used it in 2 months, meaning she doesn't use it. Now I'm trying to get her number through her friends one by one. I'll get to her somehow, I just got to find out the best link to get to her.

[Rapidfire]

[quote name='Double C4' timestamp='1356828961' post='6105603']
Good to know Remo.

BTW, my progress on finding her is slowly but surely getting somewhere. Problem is, I found her Facebook, turns out she hasn't used it in 2 months, meaning she doesn't use it. Now I'm trying to get her number through her friends one by one. I'll get to her somehow, I just got to find out the best link to get to her.
[/quote]

Just ask her directly.

[♦~Thug-Life~♦]

Username - Thug Life
Gender?:I'm a man!
Are you in a relationship?:Yes! :3
Do you have love experience?: I've done it all c: Some good situations, and some bad :c
Do you mind having your relationship status open to public?: Well duh! Who in the world wouldn't want to know they are dating someone they really care for, and love <3

[Kōsuke Ueki]

If only that were easy.[list=1]
[*]I have no idea where she is.
[*]I'm not given enough independence to go out and look for her.
[*]I wouldn't know where to start.
[/list]
In all honesty, I would love to ask her directly, but her location is unknown to me so I have to rely on her friends to give me her contact info. And to be honest, that's about all of the resources I have.

[Spirit of DMG]

Remo, what are you talking about. Clearly, it was only after reading that speech you typed from your phone that C-4 was able to figure out what to do. It's the only logical explanation.

[DL]

[quote name='♦~Thug-Life~♦' timestamp='1356833102' post='6105694']
Username - Thug Life
Gender?:I'm a man!
Are you in a relationship?:Yes! :3
Do you have love experience?: I've done it all c: Some good situations, and some bad :c
Do you mind having your relationship status open to public?: Well duh! Who in the world wouldn't want to know they are dating someone they really care for, and love <3
[/quote]
You seem like my type of guy

...I mean that in the least homosexual way possible.

Anyway, accepted. :3

[Kōsuke Ueki]

[quote name='Deuce Gorgon' timestamp='1356842357' post='6105865']
Remo, what are you talking about. Clearly, it was only after reading that speech you typed from your phone that C-4 was able to figure out what to do. It's the only logical explanation.
[/quote]

Not even close. I saw that speech as off topic, so I ignored it. No offense Remo.