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Ask Carl Anything


Carl

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best tasting body part?

 

Gotta go with hands. Always fun to yank the knuckles apart and munch on the dismembered fingers like ribs.

 

Know Carl from Retroville?

 

I've never heard of him, but since I know how to Google things now, I searched his name and watched some videos of him. He sounds like Paul before puberty.

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Will you describe what you would do to a member, other than myself? Take your pick, whoever is fine.

 

What a fantastic question. The options are limitless, but considering my laziness and lack of knowledge of people here, I don't really know who'd be the best pick. I could start with this Striker fellow, though the question is should I eviscerate him or turn him inside-out? If it's the latter, should I do it through the mouth or the anus? The anus would be easier cause there's more to grab at arm's length, but the mouth would allow for better slip-in. That being said, I could turn his entire body into a necklace for one of my sculptures with his digestive system being the chains and his body being some kind of weird pendant, though weirdness shows character, so it's fine. Now would a chain of digestive organs work or should I just braid up the nerves and use the organs to make more sculptures? It's hard to find a meat grinder these days, so mashing them up would be a pain, but braiding the nerves is hard work too, so it's really just a matter of what colors go good with what. I could use the organs and bind it with nerves just to get the best of both worlds.

 

Hard to say, man. I usually just go with the flow. I don't really think about what I'm gonna do most of the time.

 

Also, nothing personal, Striker. Consider it a compliment, cause I only choose the best for the best results.

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Where did you get that hat? It's so fresh.

 

It's actually Paul's. He used to wear it when he sleeps, but I started wearing it as a joke and I couldn't get myself to take it off cause his sweat gets me off.

 

Of course, that was the explanation I had back when I thought he was a woman... now I only wear it cause it reminds me of him... still kinds gets me off, though, not gonna lie.

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How does Black's infatuation with you make you feel? XD

 

It's about time someone truly appreciated my work. I'm long due for an admirer, to be honest.

 

How is a llama a monster?

 

I know right? All I want to do is grow as an artist and people give me the worst feedback ever. Can you explain to me how screams of pain and terror are considered criticism? People need to look at the big picture for once.

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What do you feel about Paul? Aside from the sweat thing.

 

He was always a bit of a stiff, but I honestly like that about him. One thing I miss is his reactions. Those are always fun to see.

 

When is your marriage to Black going to be held?

 

Why would I marry anyone? I'm a sociopathic animal that kills anyone I find suspicious, so it might not last long either way. Plus if there was a wedding, I would advise that the marriage wouldn't involve family or friends cause there's a chance something bad will happen to them.

 

To add to Giga's question, what would be an ideal wedding gift?

 

If someone could get me some middle-eastern child refugees, that'd be nice. I heard they have unique anatomy to add variety to my work.

 

Are you considering formaldehyde in any of your future works?

 

Nah, I'm not a big fan of chemicals personally, though I'll use it only if it's necessary and efficient. Atom bombs seem to get me everything I need.

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