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Chuck Norris jokes


The Slime Lord

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Chuck Norris Can Touch MC Hammer.

 

Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

 

If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

 

Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.

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Chuck Norris Can Touch MC Hammer.

 

Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

 

If you can see Chuck Norris' date=' he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

 

Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.

[/quote']

All already posted.

@Goldshine: It's a dwarf planet.

 

There is no 'Control' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.

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Chuck Norris makes Popsicle impossible (only makes sense if you saw the Man of Popsicle commercials)

 

Chuck Norris is the only one who can defeat Sunny'D (only makes sense if you saw the Sunny'D commercials)

 

yes I made these up...

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They once tried to carve Chuck Norris' face into Mount Rushmore, but the granite wasn't hard enough for his beard

 

There are only two things in the world that can cut diamonds ... other diamonds and CHUCK NORRIS!!!!

 

The Credits for Walking Texas Ranger were actully a list of fatalities that occured.

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I know that technically this isn't a joke, but, it made me burst out laughing. Earlier, I made a Chuck Norris card for a different thread. When I was cleaning my cards out, this popped up.

 

2hd04tv.jpg

 

I hope you like that as much as me and my friends did.

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nah i have the limit of pics i can have and the reasons i am not deliting them are

 

1. picture one is my result in my what haruhi character are you......i got haruhi as most and nagato as second, i have had this for a long time i will not get rid of it for awhile

 

2. i am defently not geting rid of my sos brigade club link (its my pervert club)

 

and 3. i am not getting rid of salior dude because thats the funnest thing i have seen on this forum (men dressed up in salior moon cloase really crack me up for some reason)

 

nway thats why sorry

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Chuck Norris was not happy with the social status of the world so he roundhouse kicked the planet and everyone went down a rank.

 

Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.

 

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

 

Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

 

Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.

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