Bad Translator

[Northern Sage]

Original text:

"I'll now proceed to pleasure myself with this fish."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Now, I don't think it's a fish."

 

Still what.

[Forest Fire]

ori:

"The roaring fire that purges"

...23 translations later and Yandex give us:

"Cleaning"

 

What, when, and why

[Flash Flyer - Sakura]

Original text: "Being a moderator is not a popularity contest; moderators are chosen to lead the forum and make sure things don't devolve into a chaotic mess."

(I can't find the original quote by Night [language and everything] when he said this, so...)
 
Translation (33 times later): "What is the most popular level, the choice here, and make sure that everything is in chaos. "
 
Yeah, just no.

 

Translation (10 times later; random): "That admin is a popularity contest, the Guardians, who was elected to the Leadership of the forum and make sure that everything ended in chaos and disorder."

 

Well, it appears bad translation = chaos.

[Mr Dr Professor Spaz]

Charcoal Inpachi

"A wicked wooden spirit that has burned out. The barbecue grilled with this charcoal is so awesome that everybody thinks it's priceless"

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Dry the grill, which is good, because people think that the time has come for free. "

Dunames Dark Witch

"Even when all odds are against this brave fairy, she will press onwards in battle and never retreat."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Finally, tista'tibda war, adventure, tista'titlef."

Evilswarm Heliotrope (had to be done)

".ytilaer a maerd rieht ekam thgim yeht taht os ydob a rof gninraey ,sluos mrawsleetS gniregnil fo sthguoht eht era esehT "!etanimretxE !etacidarE !etanimilE""

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"You have the right scent pump yeht ydob gninraey labelling system. ytilaer Florida information between mrawsleetS ESET sthguoht gniregnil benches! etanimretxE! tacidar! etanimilE

Gigobyte

"He has a tranquil soul, but carries a destiny that one day his heart shall be tainted by evil...."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Everything was quiet, but this is not the fate of ħazin....."

[Forest Fire]

Alien Shocktrooper

"The Aliens have used a mysterious biological substance to create a supreme race of soldiers. They do not have the natural powers of the other Aliens, but can make stunning physical attacks."

16 translations later, Yandex gives us:

Using biological materials, the creation of a superior race, and soldier secret. The Board of Directors of gas and other foreigners, by the way, the unexpected attack.

Where on earth did "The Board of Directors" come from?

 

Atlantean Pikeman

"The Great Ocean Lord, who reigns over the depths, is served by these lancers. Deep-sea creatures exist in fear of facing the stream of attacks their lances are capable of."

10 translation later and Yandex gives us:

"The master of the great ocean, which was published on the background of the dominance of these pikemen. Fear, deep, water, water spear attack."

[Mr Dr Professor Spaz]

Warrior of Zera

"A wandering warrior who seeks the sanctuary where he can gain the power of the Archlords. To escape the temptation of evil fiends, he fights solo day by day."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Find the needs of the company, if you can find health, how to steal a skyscraper, fighter jet, plane, on foot, to avoid unpleasant monster war, just a day."

---

Sea Serpent Warrior of Darkness

"A warrior who defends the world of the Sea of Darkness. He prides himself on his fighting prowess both on the ground and, of course, in the water."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Black sea forces to protect the world. This beautiful military units, instead of the water cycle."

---

Nin-Ken Dog:

"A Ninja dog who has mastered extreme Ninjutsu. Through hard training, it learned the technique to metamorphose into a human being."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Ninja is a dog, a lot of discipline and education"

---

Skull Dog Marron

"A lost dog that wandered off 1000 years ago. He's still waiting for his master to come for him."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"So far the dogs have lost more than 1000 years. For the delay to your body."

[JessicaMuddy]

"A fiend with dark powers for confusing the enemy. Among the Fiend-Type monsters, this monster boasts considerable force. (This card is always treated as an ‟Archfiend" card.)"

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Demon from the dark forces of the enemy, this is not good, this time, a demon, a monster, a monster more powerful. (This card is always the biggest enemy of the report.)"

[Resident Fascist]

Original text:

"I am the wings of despair and the breath of ruin, I am the fell dragon, Grima..."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Last cry of the dragon, I think it's important..."

 

Original text:

"The Igknight tactician, renown for being calm, collected, and intellectual. In reality it just takes a while for the blood to rush to his head, so he's apparently always about to snap inside."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Tactical style, scary and smart IG Knight. In fact, the time, no blood in the face, but, of course, there is."

 

Original text:

"Booting in Replica Mode… An error has occurred when executing C:\sophia\zefra.exe Unknown publisher. Allow C:\tierra\qliphort.exe ? …[Y] Booting in Autonomy Mode…"

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"When I got off the plane... 错 误 ' C:\sophia\zefra.exe My husband knows about it. C:\tierra\qliphort.exe ? "

[TF2_The_Scout]

Original text:

 

"This legendary dragon is a powerful engine of destruction. Virtually invincible, very few have faced this awesome creature and lived to tell the tale."

 

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

 

"This legendary Dragon is a powerful engine of destruction. almost perfect,it's impossible. don't have anything to say in the letter."

[Flash Flyer - Sakura]

Original text:

 

"Yuya Sakaki should stop dueling and join the circus. He's a greater fool than the legendary Idiot Brothers from Naruto episodes 142 to 147, and that says quite a lot."

 

[Yes, this is anti-Yuya]

 

Translated text (33 randoms):

 

"Yuya Sakaki is to stop the fight and the circus, it's crazy, especially the legendary stupid brothers, when the family Naruto 142 147. "

 

(Hmm...)

 

--------------

Original text:

 

It does not matter if you joined before the moderators; while you are in this section, you are to abide by any commands given to you by a staff member; no exceptions.

We have zero tolerance for backtalk and there will be severe punishment if you fail to obey commands.

 

(Paraphrased version of basic rules 2-3 from CC, which should be common sense.)

 

Translated text:

 

"In any case, when the leader of the driveway, this is a team without exception. I have no tolerance for quality, can not be punished."

 

(What the hell?)

[Mr Dr Professor Spaz]

Frostosaurus:

"This monster's metabolism enables it to endure long periods of cold, harnessing the power to become a creature of solid ice! Nothing else can withstand such temperatures, especially victims of its glacial rampage."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"You għata riħ on the ice is a metabolism that will help you to focus your hard disk cd. High temperature, especially for the wrath of God."

Gem-Knight Sapphire:

"His Sapphire power commands the waters to protect him from attack. His comrades trust in his silent protection."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Delivery of bottled water, defence, attack, defense, faith, peace and friendship."

[GarlandChaos]

I ran the flavor text of Giant Mech-Soldier, one of my favorite old vanillas, through this thing.

 

This was the result.

 

Original text:

"This monster swings an earth-shaking axe that cannot be blocked by a common sword."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"This hack has shocked the world, can stop a normal sword."

 

Apparently he makes really good ROM hacks that jump out of your computer or other devices and protect you from death by blades.

 

I can dig it.

[Flash Flyer - Sakura]

Original: "How do you expect to win, if you can't destroy me with the power you have now?"
 
(Hint #1 from the Easter Event this year)
 
Translated: "How to make money if you can't kill me, it's a power that at the present time. "
 
------------
Original: "When two suns climb up to the sky, the grounds of a new world shall open up! Xyz Summon! Appear, Rank 8! DDD Twin Dawn King Kali Yuga!"

 

(Reiji's summoning chant)

 

Translated: "When two of the sun rising into the sky, the feet, a new world opened! Call XYZ! To look at level 8! Paradise, two sun king of Kali-Yuga!"

 

(Meh, close enough)

[Forest Fire]

D/D/D Oracle Overlord D'Arc's Summoning Chant:
"Proud knight, be absorbed into the crucible of disaster! Be reborn into a new king! Fusion Summon! Come forth! Ruler who carries the glory of God! DDD Oracle King - D'Arc!"
 
10 Translations later and Yandex gives us:
Proud Knight, crash! King was born in stock, new! The fusion, as you know! Be!!! Director, is presented very well. The prophecy RAYA in the Palace of the king.

m'k.

[Tojin]

Original text:

"Gluttony may be destructive, but that doesn't mean abstinence is constructive."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Good food, I know what happens, but it does not mean that it is a good length."

(And yes, I nicked it from Forest Fire's signature.)

[Forest Fire]

"There is no god, so why not bow to the truth of death?"
 

15 translations later and Yandex gives us:

"There is no other God in the truth, it's about time"
 

 


 

[Northern Sage]

Original text:

"we put the wink in tiddlywinks"

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

" Watch"

…What?

[Forest Fire]

 

Original text:

"we put the wink in tiddlywinks"

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

" Watch"

…What?

 

dafaq...

[Mr Dr Professor Spaz]

DN's last announcement (4/1 Banlist)

"DN is using the new Forbidden/Limited List. To use a deck in Advanced or Traditional, please double-check your deck adheres to the new ban list and resave your deck. All duelist ratings have been reset to 100 for the new format."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"List kumpaniji can be used in square metres, on two floors, on the couch, or if you want to make sure that you are on the list,can you tell me if you want to try and another song 100."

---

Hunter Dragon:

"This dragon has taken down countless prey with its sharp fangs. It strikes very quickly, because if it does not strike first, it is vulnerable to a counter-attack."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Many people said. The teeth of the first image, even if you do not hurry because of the attack."

---

Renge, Gatekeeper of the Dark World

"His renowned athletic physique has made him famous with the populace of Dark World. They call him "Iron Wall Renge" because no one can break through his incredible defenses."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"I'm an athlete known that the object of the world's population. In steel, this is due to the protection of the magic word on the wall, in a corner."

[Flash Flyer - Sakura]

Original: "The fact that you are from 2008 is irrelevant; we do not care if you've been here longer than us. While you are a member of this forum, you are to obey any and all commands given to you by a moderator without question."
 
(Excerpt from a warning given to someone for backtalking to myself and Nai a while back. You needn't know whom it was given to, however.)
 
Translated (10 + Yandex): "In fact, since 2008; we believe that if you stay here more time with us. I am a member of this forum, You must comply with all team leaders, no doubt. "
 
(First part makes no sense; last one is acceptable enough)
 
-------------
Original: "Unusual plaything possessed by demons! Destroy and root out the plebeians who dare rebel against you!"

 

(Sora's summon chant for Deathtoy Mad Chimaera)

 

Translated (10 + Yandex): "An unusual game, diabolical obsession. The dismantling and destruction of the country that dares to stand against you!"

[Northern Sage]

Original text:

"The inquisition has ingeniously solved the query by disregarding it."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Research still I have an idea to solve this problem, you can ignore."

[Resident Fascist]

Original text:

"Aha! I have done it! Behold the absolute power of Wilfred Fizzlebang! Master Summoner! You are bound to me, Demon!"

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"!!!!Do it! I did it!!! This is a good thing, of course, Wilfred fizzle out with a bang! God is a prerequisite for The administrators."

Original text:

"Trifling gnome! Your arrogance will be your undoing!"

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"This little fairy! It's terrible!"

Original text:

"Come on and slam and welcome to Japan"

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"The faith Welcome to Japan."

Original text:

"Rudimentary creatures of blood and flesh. You touch my mind, fumbling in ignorance, incapable of understanding. "

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Blood and body B is the most important thing, so let's not,in my opinion,stupid,stupid. 

[Northern Sage]

Original text:

"The exhausted Barrier Trio struck one final Barrier pose. It was spectacular."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Once there, the three things appear in Fig. she is the best. "

 

Original text:

"She was also living on the border of Gensokyo."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"We will focus on line."